Boy Am I Tired!!!
I finally have a day off that I don't have anything to do. I slept till noon. It is a sweet indulgence I don't enjoy that often anymore. The heavy season has hit the CFS unit where I work. I am working 12 hour days 5 days a week and then an 8 or 10 hour day on the sixth. I am making good money, but I am so damned tired. It will be another month or so of this. I am looking for another job and have a few options. I am praying to move back to NY soon. The USCIS is taking its time with our file. LOL. I finally became a morning person. I am up at 530 am. I get home usually at 10 pm these days. I fall into bed and get up to do it all over again. My poor husband is being drug along for the ride. No wonder my sex life sucks.
I got the all clear from my OB. I am healthy and clean. We can start trying to concieve in April if we so choose. My husband is ify on all of that. I think he is scared shitless of me miscarrying again as the physical and emotional pain was great. I still have my down days, but there are more up days than down. My husand is having a crisis of sorts that was brought up by the miscarriagae. We all grieve in our own ways. It has also brought up other issues. I think he is torn b/w Eastern and Western values as well as some family developments in Pakistan. It is a terrible place to be in the middle with no clear direction to take on top of grief and pain associated with your wife's miscarriage. I have been in the middle. It is a confusing place to be.
I am now under 210 lbs. I am tring to follow my diet. I don't have time to exercise nor the energy when I do. I am in a size 16. I haven't been this small in a long time...since my sophomore year in college. Loosing weight has also changed my bra size. I am now in a D cup. It is amazing what loosing a bit of weight around the middle will do. I lost a total of 20 pounds last year.
Valentine's Day sucks for couples as well as single people just for different reasons. I won't have time to spend it with my husband at all. Work. I just keep reminding myself it is not a day for love but of sex. It is the first of the fertility festivals of the pagan religions that fall b/w Feb., Mar., Apr., and May depending on where you live in the world. Sex is good, but it pales to the companionship that a mate gives. I dont' even pretend I was happy single. I am very happy married. There are days I wish I had some of the benefits of being single, but I would not trade where I was emotionally with where I am now for anyhing.
I would not suggest to any of my "single and hating it" friends to hang out with anyone that has a significant other on Vday. Hang out with other singles, go to movies, or just hide in bed for the day. It can be the most depressing day of the year.
I got the all clear from my OB. I am healthy and clean. We can start trying to concieve in April if we so choose. My husband is ify on all of that. I think he is scared shitless of me miscarrying again as the physical and emotional pain was great. I still have my down days, but there are more up days than down. My husand is having a crisis of sorts that was brought up by the miscarriagae. We all grieve in our own ways. It has also brought up other issues. I think he is torn b/w Eastern and Western values as well as some family developments in Pakistan. It is a terrible place to be in the middle with no clear direction to take on top of grief and pain associated with your wife's miscarriage. I have been in the middle. It is a confusing place to be.
I am now under 210 lbs. I am tring to follow my diet. I don't have time to exercise nor the energy when I do. I am in a size 16. I haven't been this small in a long time...since my sophomore year in college. Loosing weight has also changed my bra size. I am now in a D cup. It is amazing what loosing a bit of weight around the middle will do. I lost a total of 20 pounds last year.
Valentine's Day sucks for couples as well as single people just for different reasons. I won't have time to spend it with my husband at all. Work. I just keep reminding myself it is not a day for love but of sex. It is the first of the fertility festivals of the pagan religions that fall b/w Feb., Mar., Apr., and May depending on where you live in the world. Sex is good, but it pales to the companionship that a mate gives. I dont' even pretend I was happy single. I am very happy married. There are days I wish I had some of the benefits of being single, but I would not trade where I was emotionally with where I am now for anyhing.
I would not suggest to any of my "single and hating it" friends to hang out with anyone that has a significant other on Vday. Hang out with other singles, go to movies, or just hide in bed for the day. It can be the most depressing day of the year.