"This is to a girl who got inside my head with all the fucked up things I did."
And you're restless, and I'm naked.
You've got to get out, you can't stand to see me shaking.
Sometimes when I'm alone at night, probably a little drunk like I usually am, I think about lying in her bed at night, listening to music... talking when we felt like it. And I get the biggest fucking smile on my face. And then I maybe feel sad. But it's okay, because it was so good.
I'm happy for her. I am. I think I am. But if I actually put myself in that situation it might kill me. I can't take the chance. I'm screwed enough as it is.
She msn's me and calls me and says come and stay. Come see my new flat, my new life, my boyfriend (he's not new, I already know him), see what it's like without you. See how great it all it without you.
I don't think it's intentional tbh. We said we'd try and be friends, we were and we weren't and we were. I just didn't tell her when I couldn't take it anymore. I just let it fade.
But if I go and stay with her for a few days, fuck it - for a few hours, I don't know if I can handle it. I think it might just be like pressing the self destruct button, really.
I loved her more than I hated myself. Which, back then, was quite a feat lol. She was like nothing else ever was. Which is why I can't just forget her, I think. Well, and the phone calls. Those don't help. And the memories; truths told, tears shed, the things she said. They don't help either. So maybe I'll just hold onto the good stuff.
Lying in her bed at night, listening to music... talking when we felt like it. The biggest fucking smile on my face. Yeah.
You've got to get out, you can't stand to see me shaking.
Sometimes when I'm alone at night, probably a little drunk like I usually am, I think about lying in her bed at night, listening to music... talking when we felt like it. And I get the biggest fucking smile on my face. And then I maybe feel sad. But it's okay, because it was so good.
I'm happy for her. I am. I think I am. But if I actually put myself in that situation it might kill me. I can't take the chance. I'm screwed enough as it is.
She msn's me and calls me and says come and stay. Come see my new flat, my new life, my boyfriend (he's not new, I already know him), see what it's like without you. See how great it all it without you.
I don't think it's intentional tbh. We said we'd try and be friends, we were and we weren't and we were. I just didn't tell her when I couldn't take it anymore. I just let it fade.
But if I go and stay with her for a few days, fuck it - for a few hours, I don't know if I can handle it. I think it might just be like pressing the self destruct button, really.
I loved her more than I hated myself. Which, back then, was quite a feat lol. She was like nothing else ever was. Which is why I can't just forget her, I think. Well, and the phone calls. Those don't help. And the memories; truths told, tears shed, the things she said. They don't help either. So maybe I'll just hold onto the good stuff.
Lying in her bed at night, listening to music... talking when we felt like it. The biggest fucking smile on my face. Yeah.