Candles In The Window~ Decemeber 23rd . . .
A/N: Part two of the Holiday series inspired by Cris’ question, regarding Teddy’s holiday experience with the Kaplans given their difference in traditions.
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Candles In The Window
Previous Parts:
~December 20th~
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December 23rd . . .
Billy trudged down the hall half coherent, the night’s chill sending tiny shivers down his spine. His feet knew the way down the hall even if his brain was still too asleep to consciously plan his route.
It was late, or was it very early? Whatever it was, it was an ungodly hour to be out of bed. Yet, when he had made a late night pitstop at the bathroom and noticed Teddy’s door ajar, his groggy vision failed to find his boyfriend in his room. The bed, in fact, was neatly made, making him wonder if Teddy had made an attempt to sleep at all, or if he just woke up with no intention of returning to bed.
A faint flickering light bled down the hall from the family room, so he ambled along with all the coordination of a zombie hoping it would lead him to his AWOL boyfriend. Sure enough, a blonde head was peaking over the back of the sectional, where Teddy sat gazing up at a lit menorah.
Billy scratched a shoulder, yawning around his words, “Not ‘pose to light ‘em till the next night- ahh-haaw, once they’ve been put out.”
Teddy tensed, noticeably shifting when he whirled around, before his gaze found Billy’s sleep swollen eyes. His alarm quickly morphed into bewildered dismay, “Oh man … Seriously? Sorry, I just thought …”
Billy snorted, padding to over on socked feet to wrap his arms around Teddy’s shoulders, burying a chilled nose into the back of his neck, “Oh, you’re in trouble now. The Big Guy might just smite you for being over-enthusiastic with candles.”
“Your nose is cold,” Teddy flinched, but his hand ruffled Billy’s hair gently.
“Hmm, all of me is cold,” he whined, snuggling closer, “Tee… what you doing out here?”
The world did a small flip as Teddy easily dragged him over the back of the couch and into his arms. Grabbing the fleece throw off the cushions, he wrapped it around them both, settling his chin on Billy’s shoulder as he pulled him against his chest.
“Better?” Teddy asked against his cheek.
Billy hummed contentedly, shuffling and leaning closer to him, “Best. Boyfriend. Ever.”
Teddy’s chuckle ghosted warm breath across his cheek as he looked up at the lit menorah, but he said nothing else as his gaze returned to the flickering candlelight. He pulled the edge of the throw, sliding it continually between his fingers as the silence stretched. Billy counted forty swipes of the blanket before he decided to press.
“Also the most evasive boyfriend ever … ” Billy stressed, twining his fingers with Teddy’s to stop the nervous tick the other probably didn’t even realize he had.
“We should put out the candles …” Teddy answered in a listless mumble, “If I wasn’t supposed to light them.”
“That would mean getting up.”
“You could always magic them off.”
“Then it would be dark,” Billy traced his thumb over the back of Teddy’s hand. “Something tells me you don’t want to sit here in the dark … ”
Teddy’s mouth opened to argue, then clicked it shut. Billy resisted the urge to sigh. His boyfriend was like a Chinese finger trap when it came to talking about the things that bothered him. Sometimes, the harder you pried, the tighter he’d clam up; but sometimes a gentle push in the right direction would get him to release.
“It’s really cold in here,” he changed the subject, feeling Teddy relax behind him. “I dunno how you can stand it.”
“Alien physiology,” Teddy smirked, though it was a little weak.
“If only we were all so fortunate in our genetic makeup,” Billy elbowed him, “Ah! I know just the thing that will warm us up, and keep us out of the dark … IwantafireplaceIwantafireplace-”
The wall in front of the them glowed blue, shifting and morphing, the flatscreen tv mounted there lifting higher, a hearth formed underneath it and a fire burst into life, crackling and hissing as it filled the room with a comfortably warm glow. Another murmur and two steaming cups appeared in Billy’s hands. He passed one off to Teddy.
“Coffee?”
“Cocoa.”
“Billy Kaplan. Are you trying to seduce me?”
“That depends … ”
“On what exactly?”
“On whether or not it’s working,” Billy waggled his brows with a sly grin that set Teddy to snickering into his shoulder.
Billy smiled gently, feeling a weight lift off of Teddy’s shoulders, almost as clearly as if it had been on his own. His fingers threaded through the short hair at the nape of Teddy’s neck, prodding no further; all that was left now, was to wait. Their cups were half empty before Teddy broke the silence.
“I was thinking about Mom and stuff … ”
“What kind of stuff?” Billy’s fingers resumed their soothing caresses as Teddy sighed.
“What we … used to do this time of year- together. And …”
“You miss it,” Billy finished when Teddy trailed off.
“I miss her …” Teddy swallowed thickly, “A lot.”
Billy placed their mugs on the coffee table, tugging at Teddy until they were stretched out along the length of the chaise, Teddy’s head pillowed on his chest and throw tucked around them as he ran soothing fingers through blonde hair.
“Did you guys do a lot of shopping this time of year?”
Teddy took a steadying breath, arms tightening around Billy as he huffed a short laugh, “Not really, ‘cause we didn’t have anyone but each to shop for. That was always a trip, trying to get her present without her seeing- ‘cause, I mean when I was younger I couldn’t go to the store by myself. And mom actually, would have to pay for her own present, God. It was so pointless, but she always let me wrap it and put it under the tree. And she’d act so surprised when she opened it on Christmas, as if she hadn’t helped me wrap it up or anything.”
Billy smiled wide, his heart squeezing a little, “That’s … actually kinda adorable. Maybe a lot adorable.”
Teddy nodded against his shoulder, “She’d go crazy with the lights every year too, put them on all our windows, along the ceiling of the apartment, even the fire escape. I can’t tell you how many fuses she blew. The landlord used to get so mad …”
Billy laughed at the image of Sarah Altman entangled in Christmas lights, but slowly sobered up as something clicked, “Is that why you lit the menorah again?”
“I just … wanted some lights … Mom would get stuck with a lot of extra shifts this time of year, worked real late most nights, but I’d always wait up for her. In the living room, with all the lights off except- Except the tree and the Christmas lights. I’d just … watch them blink and shimmer on the ornaments- Mom had those crazy lights that blinked in time with music. She’d get home, and … and no matter how late- she’d always have a bag of these holiday nut mixes. And we’d stay up a little longer, cracking and eating them up before bed …”
He trailed off, unable to steady his voice an longer. When he spoke up again his breath hitched.
“I keep hoping … She’s just working late again … And she’ll be home, any minute-”
“Oh- oh Teddy,” Billy held him tight as Teddy broke down in his arms, wishing- not for the first time- that he had been stronger, strong enough to save Sarah that day.
He rubbed at his own eyes, forcing himself to breathe evenly; the least he could do was to be strong for Teddy now. Rubbing small circles into his back, Billy held him close until the sobs subsided, and all that was left was the crackling of the fire.
Tomorrow was Christmas Eve, and even though it might be a tight press for time, Billy wondered …
“Teddy? Do you think-” Billy looked down only to realize his boyfriend had fallen asleep, “Of course, pfft …”
Rolling his eyes with a fond sigh, he pressed a kiss into messy blonde hair before settling closer, keeping a protective arm around the other boy.
“G’nite, Tee …” he whispered, drifting off alongside him to the soft crackle of the fireplace.
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Next~ Decemeber 24th . . .
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