(no subject)
wow, its been a long time since i last posted.
to be fair having a little recap, im such a fucking drama queen man.
woah like seriously.
calm the fuck down.
my tooth hurts :'[
meh naths at work ash and izzy are downstairs and i have a spliff and the used
mhm, lifes pretty good.
been listenin to such old music lately, not really old, but old in the sense i heard it along time ago.
i miss those days
those care free days
i like how it makes me rememeber them, iw as so confused and so emotional and just wow. insane basically
i like to reflect on my self on self progress in thinking and physically
been thinking about alan as well. which is weird, cause i never do really. and he just poped into my head the other day and i was looking on youtube and found videos of him hypotizing people in a pub and it just made me think of lying in his bed next to him with his breath on my face looking into my eyes and talking to me softly. its wierd how those memories come back to you. its wierd how those 4 days at that moment felt like everything to m, felt like my whole entire world was contructed on those few hours and it was like the entire foundations of my life were shook and broken when it all came tumbling down, but im glad it id, im glad i had the opertunity to restart myself and take a step out of the emotion and look at the situation and the man i was actually dealing with, cause i got nathan, its like waking up from a dream and long hazy endless fog that lasted a life time. and i feel so... different.
ive come to realise that all life is is a serious of perceptions and reactions and choices. and the only moment you truely have it now. this very second and instant that you breath and blink is all that is truely yours, and you can choose to know it or not. you can choose to acknolage.
ive been thinking about pike, and whats been going on in his mind. its scary to see someone you thought you knew change so much, and i wish i knew how to help. but i think to help you need to understand and thats alot easier said than done.
its just another reminder to keep my life balanced and stable.
i guess i just have to try.
to be fair having a little recap, im such a fucking drama queen man.
woah like seriously.
calm the fuck down.
my tooth hurts :'[
meh naths at work ash and izzy are downstairs and i have a spliff and the used
mhm, lifes pretty good.
been listenin to such old music lately, not really old, but old in the sense i heard it along time ago.
i miss those days
those care free days
i like how it makes me rememeber them, iw as so confused and so emotional and just wow. insane basically
i like to reflect on my self on self progress in thinking and physically
been thinking about alan as well. which is weird, cause i never do really. and he just poped into my head the other day and i was looking on youtube and found videos of him hypotizing people in a pub and it just made me think of lying in his bed next to him with his breath on my face looking into my eyes and talking to me softly. its wierd how those memories come back to you. its wierd how those 4 days at that moment felt like everything to m, felt like my whole entire world was contructed on those few hours and it was like the entire foundations of my life were shook and broken when it all came tumbling down, but im glad it id, im glad i had the opertunity to restart myself and take a step out of the emotion and look at the situation and the man i was actually dealing with, cause i got nathan, its like waking up from a dream and long hazy endless fog that lasted a life time. and i feel so... different.
ive come to realise that all life is is a serious of perceptions and reactions and choices. and the only moment you truely have it now. this very second and instant that you breath and blink is all that is truely yours, and you can choose to know it or not. you can choose to acknolage.
ive been thinking about pike, and whats been going on in his mind. its scary to see someone you thought you knew change so much, and i wish i knew how to help. but i think to help you need to understand and thats alot easier said than done.
its just another reminder to keep my life balanced and stable.
i guess i just have to try.