More Than This (4/5)

Feb 28, 2012 18:01

Title: More Than This (4/5)
Rating: NC-17
Length: 2, 631
Fandom: One Direction
Characters:Harry Styles, Louis Tomlinson, Zayn Malik, Liam Payne, Eleanor Calder, 
Ships: Harry/Louis, Eleanor/Louis
Notes: ANGST. ANGST. So many tears shed.
Summary: Harry's feelings for Louis bubble to surface after meeting his new girlfriend.


Harry’s lips still burned from Louis’ kiss, his heart still ached, and the dull throbbing between his legs ceased to stop. He hadn’t left his room for nearly two days at this point, scared to come out. He had only stepped out to use the restroom, and found some left over candies and snack foods from his bag from their last tour. God only knows if the food was any good, but Harry, who wasn’t really hungry anyway, didn’t care. Harry didn’t know that Louis was hurting too, struggling to make it day by day, lying for Harry, saying that he was just sick.

But Louis knew that Zayn knew the truth, Harry had to of told him, because whenever Louis would answer with “Oh, he’s just a bit sick with the flu, hasn’t left the bathroom in ages,” Zayn would give him a scathing look and down the rest of his drink. When finally Louis could take no more of Zayn’s glares, he asked him if he would go outside with him, to talk. Zayn readily agreed and they exited the club, the music still blaring faintly in the background, and the dull lights of cars passing by heightened Louis’ senses. Or maybe he was just drunk.

“What the hell is your problem?” Louis asked him tersely, as Zayn didn’t answer, but stuck a cigarette in his mouth, lighting it, and exhaling the toxic smoke.

“What do you mean?” Zayn asked, pretending as if he didn’t know.

Louis narrowed his eyes, “Spare me.”

“Don’t you think you’re being a bit unreasonable?” Zayn asked him calmly. “I mean, you can’t sit there and say you didn’t know, how could you not know?”

Without thinking Louis shouted in agony, “I don’t know! I don’t know, okay? Don’t you fucking think this isn’t killing me too? Don’t you think that I’m not upset?”

“I know how you feel about him, Louis,” Zayn replied evenly, never once losing his cool, he made Louis feel like a child. “I’m not an idiot, and the fact that you’re playing Harry around like that is not okay. Do you really want to fuck everything up? Not just for you, but for all of us?”

“Way to make this about yourself,” Louis snapped bitterly.

“Well, actually, I’m not,” Zayn’s voice rose a little. “Because, you see, if you and Harry are fighting, I have a problem with that, and if I have a problem Liam and Niall have a problem, and if they have a problem, I have a problem, and it goes on. When one of us is upset, we’re all upset, or have you not got that in your head by now?”

“We fooled around the other night,” Louis confessed, taking a swig of his drink. “But I had to stop...I couldn’t do that.”

“Why? Because of Eleanor?”

“Well, yeah,” Louis shrugged. “It’s not just Harry hurting, I am hurting too. Ellie’s gonna hurt, we’re all going to get hurt. So how do I fix this?”

“You don’t,” Zayn replied simply.

“Oh that’s real helpful,” Louis replied coolly.

“Well, what do you want me to say? I’m not in love with my best friend. I don’t know, I wish I did, Lou, believe me, but you’ve got to fix this, what are you even doing with Eleanor if you’re so in love with Harry?”

“I thought those feelings for Harry had died,” Louis answered, lowering his voice slightly. “I just kind of pushed them aside, I mean, that’s not normal, right? To love your best friend?”

“Isn’t that where most relationships start?” Zayn shot back.

“Maybe I’m gay,” Louis sighed, giving up the fight. “Maybe I’m not normal. Since when the fuck is any of this normal?”

“Being gay is perfectly normal and fine,” Zayn smiled reassuringly, he stamped out the cigarette and came closer to Louis, ensnaring him in a hug. “You’re too hard on yourself, Lou, you are completely normal. Maybe this situation isn’t normal, but feelings are normal, and you cannot help them sometimes, don’t bottle it up like me.”

“But I love Eleanor too,” Louis mumbled into his shoulder.

“You’ve been dating her for a couple of weeks, mate, slow down,” Zayn said.

“Well, not love her, but I do like her and I like her a lot. That’s what makes this so hard. I don’t want to lose Harry, you don’t think he’d be cross with me if I-”

“He’s already cross with you,” Zayn replied sternly. “And I want you to listen to me, you’re not hot shit because you go around fucking anyone you like. You’re not hot shit because you can hold people in the palm of your hand. And you are most certainly not hot shit just because you think you are hot shit, you’re not invincible. I love you, Louis, but sometimes, you’re a fucking idiot.”

Zayn left him there, having to swallow his bitter words and make some sense of them. Louis looked at his half finished bottle of alcohol, and spun it around in his hands.  He knew what he had to do, he had to go see Harry, before it was too late, before Harry did something drastic, or even worse, not ever want to speak to him again. He started to stumble towards the car but fell flat on his knees. Being as drunk as he was, he only felt a portion of the pain. He managed to get himself up and walk back into the club, trying desperately to find Liam.

Once he had reached him, he clapped him on the back and whispered, “I need a ride back home.”

Liam shouted over the music, completely missing Louis’ prompts to be subtle, “Why are you okay?”

Louis rolled his eyes and yelled, “Yes, I’m fine! I just need a ride and you’re the only sober one I trust, so let’s go, come on, you can come back.”

He coaxed Liam out of the club, and they searched for his care, Liam nervously chatting about how he had random girls coming up to him all night, and worried that his girlfriend would find out.

“I doubt she’d care,” Louis drawled carelessly, too drunk to really care about anyone but himself at the moment, and only half listening to what Liam was saying.

“It’s just hard having a girlfriend, sometimes you know,” Liam asked gently, climbing into his car once they’d found it, and unlocking it for Louis. “All these people all over you all the tieme, don’t you find it difficult?”

Louis blinked and slurred, “Yeah, sometimes. But, if they really love you, they’ll stick around, and if you love them, you’ll stick around, it all evens out.”

Liam nodded intensely, trying to keep his eyes on the road, but Louis might as well have been driving, seeing as Liam didn’t even have a driver’s license.

“Are you trying to fucking kill us!” Louis squeaked as Liam approached the stop a little too abruptly.

“Fuck off,” Liam shouted back irritably. “I’m trying my best! I’m not about to let you drive with how messed up you are right now.”

Louis tossed him a drunken smile, “Thanks, mate, I’m sorry I’ve been a tool to you.”

Liam grinned, not looking at Louis, “It’s alright, don’t worry. Why did you want to go home anyway?”

Louis sighed, “Well, for one thing, I fell and ripped my fucking trousers. Two, I’m getting a headache, and that music is ridiculous. And three, I need to go home and check on Haz, make sure he’s not puking up half his body weight.”

Liam cooed, “Aw, well that’s sweet of you. Tell him I said to feel better, okay?”

And before he knew it, Liam approached the curb, or rather, ran over the curb, and threw the emergency break on, “Shit! Do you have to have that bush right there?”

“Okay, Liam, try not to get pulled over alright?” Louis stumbled out of the car. “We need your voice.”

Liam leaned over and shouted a final, “Fuck off!” before slamming the door in Louis’ face, and Louis grinned. He turned to face that flat that he and Harry shared, and his heart began to beat fast, his brain spinning with thoughts that he was too drunk to even begin to comprehend. He made his way up the walk, trying to maintain his calm, and figure out what exactly he wanted to share with Harry, trying to push Eleanor far from his mind. All that mattered was Harry, and all he wanted was Harry.

He quietly slipped inside, trying not to let Harry hear him, he wanted to surprise him, and he knew that if Harry heard him slip in, he might try and run, maybe lock his door, like he had been doing recently. He nervously pried open Harry’s door, and found Harry just as he had left him, fast asleep, in nothing but his tight black boxer briefs, body sprawled across the bed. Louis smiled at the younger boy, he had never seen someone of so much beauty until Harry. Whenever he looked at him, he could just feel his heart quicken inside his chest, fighting its way out of the cage it was locked in.

He slowly sat down beside Harry’s sleeping body, and ran his hand along the small of Harry’s soft, warm back. He closed his eyes, and reveled in the pure pleasure of just being beside Harry, it was all he really needed. Suddenly, he felt Harry’s body stir and a heavy sigh came from him. He rolled over and blinked slowly at the older boy, his eyes scrunched, still filled with sleep.

“Evening, sleepyhead,” Louis giggled.

“What do you want?” Harry asked, in a harsh sleepy voice. “I thought you were out.”

“Yeah, but I came back,” Louis smirked.

“What for?”

“For you,” Louis smiled.

He leaned forward and pressed his lips to Harry’s, and yes, they were just as he had left them. He was just as he had remembered, and Harry welcomed him in, pulling Louis by the hem of his shirt closer to him, Harry gasped as Louis began to suck on his collar bone, leaving him week, he struggled to get Louis’ trousers of, not before noticing the rip in the knees.

“What happened?” he breathed.

“Oh, I um,” Louis panted, and snorted. “I tripped, I’m a little drunk.”

He reached up and pulled off his shirt, wanting to feel more of Harry against him, but Harry didn’t welcome Louis back as easily as he had before.

“What?” Louis pulled away, looking into Harry’s eyes.

“Are you sure that you aren’t just doing this because you’re drunk?” Harry asked shakily.

“Harry, I want you, in every way,” Louis pulled a hand to Harry’s cheek. “I want this so much, and I’ve wanted it for a long, long time.”

He began to kiss him once more, with a bit more passion this time, and even though his movements were staccato due to his intoxication, he still had a firm grip on Harry’s hip, grinding his crotch against Harry’s feeling Harry’s want for him. He slowly removed the rest of his trousers, never breaking eye contact with Harry. Harry’s hands splayed across Louis back, legs wrapped around his waist, never wanting anything more in his entire life. He was tired of playing and he wanted Louis right then, fuck the foreplay, he just wanted to feel Louis in every possible way.

“Louis, I want you now,” Harry growled, trying to maintain his composure. “I want you to fuck me.”

And Louis, without hesitation, slid down his own boxers before removing Harry’s, marveling at Harry, and he was just as beautiful as he had imagined he would be. He slowly moved his hands down Harry’s long torso, till he reached the spot Harry wanted the most. He grabbed the length in his hands, and Harry moaned loudly, and Louis couldn’t help but smile a little. Even though he was pissed out of his mind with alcohol, he was still the one with the most control. Slowly he spread Harry’s legs, wanting to relive this moment each and every single day. He pressed himself against Harry’s entrance, Harry muttering breathless pleas against his arm, trying not to yell out with pleasure.

“Are you sure, Hazza?” Louis breathed.

Harry nodded his head and groaned, “God, I just want you so bad, Lou.”

The press inside is tight and hot and perfect. Harry pants shakily and his face is wet with perspiration. Louis moves cautiously at first, trying not to hurt Harry, but Harry grabbed Louis’ hips and gasped, “Lou, faster.”

Louis buries himself inside and angles to hit Harry’s prostate. He stays nestled there for a moment or two before pulling out and slamming back in, setting a fast, punishing pace and watching Harry’s open, moaning mouth, and he tries not to come right then and there, and it all just feels so good. He’s expecting this is a dream he’ll wake up from, but Harry was real, he was living and breathing flesh, wiggling below him. Louis brought his mouth down and sucked on Harry’s bottom lip, stifling his moans if only slightly. Louis tries so hard not to cum, trying to get Harry to the finish line first. But Harry is just as stubborn as Louis, sinking his teeth into the older’s boy’s shoulder, clawing at his back. Finally, when Louis can take it no more, he surrenders himself to ecstacy, his moans loud and whiney, his movements became sloppy and disorganized. Harry came shortly after, looking into Louis’ eyes, arching his back off the bed, and bring Louis’ face into the crook of his neck.

They lay there for awhile, Louis still inside of Harry, feeling every inch of his body with his fingers, Harry moving Louis’ sweaty Harry from his face, and kissing his forehead.

“So, what now?” Harry finally sighed, daring to break the sweet silence.

Louis pulled himself out of Harry, and lay down beside him, entangling his legs with Harry’s. He grabbed Harry’s hand and kissed it, and grinned at him, “I have no idea.”

“Shouldn’t we have some sort of a plan?”

“Why? That would just ruin all the fun,” Louis teased.

Suddenly, footsteps sounded down the hallway, Louis tried to fumble around for his clothes, but it was too late, he was still too drunk to move efficiently or quickly, all of his movements delayed and flimsy. Eleanor’s voice sounded, “Louis?”

Harry whispered frantically, “Oh, shit!”

But it was too late, it was too late for them, Eleanor turned the corner into Harry’s bedroom, seeing them laying there together, naked, the room smelling of stale sex. Eleanor’s mouth parted open, disbelief and agony flooding her face. She pressed a hand to her mouth, and Louis just stared at her, unsure of what to say or even do. She shook her head as he began to move, and spun around on her heels and ran out of the house.

Louis looked at Harry with a worried look, and Harry squeezed his hand in sympathy, “We fucked everything up.”

character: eleanor calder, rating: nc-17, character: liam payne, pairing: louis/harry, character: harry styles, fandom: one direction, length: 2000+ words, character: louis tomlinson, character: zayn malik, fic: more than this, pairing: louis/eleanor

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