Light Of My Life (3/3)
Title: Light Of My Life
Rating: NC-17
Length: 5, 667
Fandom: One Direction
Characters: Louis Tomlinson, Harry Styles, Zayn Malik, Nick Grimshaw,
Ships: Louis/Harry, Harry/Zayn,
Notes: Based off of the novel Lolita by Vladimir Nabokov. (the next few parts will be much longer)
Summary: Harry, light of my life, fire of my loins. My sin, my soul...
After a while Louis began to see the old shine that Harry would get in his eyes whenever he came around was fading. He seemed almost unimpressed by Louis’ presence. No amount of food or toys Louis bought him could make Harry happy. He realized he was depriving Harry of his boyhood. When they’d drive through towns they’d see other children at play on the sidewalk, laughing and happy, and Harry would just sigh and scowl at Louis. Louis was guilty. He had turned Harry into his own personal play thing and had forgotten entirely that Harry was still a child.
They would sit in the rocker together, Harry reading his newspaper, his hair still dripping from his shower and his tiny legs stretched over Louis’. Louis would move Harry so he was positioned perfectly. He’d ease his way inside of him causing Harry to gasp in pleasure pain. He would throw his head back and lay it against Louis’ chest. Moaning and pumping his own hips so Louis was angled inside of him perfectly. And Louis knew this should dirty, he knew he was going to Hell and he knew he was a bad person. But it just felt so good getting Harry off, just from his cock. It felt so good to fill him up and tell him just how beautiful he was.
He decided to enroll him in Beardsley, a prestigious private school with an enriched background in the fine arts. Harry liked to sing, in fact, he was very good at it. He liked to dance and he liked to draw. He had a lot of talent just waiting to be exposed. But Louis rarely let him stay after school for any type of functions. He was weary about Harry’s flirtatious side. The heads of the school were well aware of it and encouraged Louis to let Harry date. Louis was appalled, the thought of Harry going out with some pretty little girl. He demanded Harry stay home.
Most people thought this was just Louis being a protective old fashioned father. They were completely unaware of what he was really keeping Harry home for. They were unaware of what he really wanted for Harry. And Harry was catching on. He knew how to make Louis do whatever he wanted. With just the right flick of his tongue and the perfect movement of his hips and hands he could make Louis like putty in his hands.
“You know how my allowance is a dollar every Friday?” Harry asked Louis one day as he was picking at his cuticles and Louis was reading the newspaper.
“Yes,” Louis replied tersely.
“Well, I really think it should be two dollars,” Harry suggested innocently.
“I think it should just stay a dollar,” Louis wasn’t giving up this easy.
Harry crawled over to Louis’ lap and slowly began to drag his hands across Louis’ thighs. Louis let out a deep groan and peered over at the younger boy below him. Harry’s eyes were devious. He was a wild one and Louis couldn’t take it anymore.
“A dollar fifty,” Louis said weakly.
“Is that all I get?” Harry whispered. “Is that all you’re gonna give me daddy?”
He palmed him through his trousers, running his hot mouth along Louis’ thighs. Louis gasped and bit his lip. He hated when Harry did this, he just wanted to bend him over the desk and take him right there. He wanted to make Harry beg for him instead. Harry was mischievously smirking up at him; he knew just what he was doing. Just the right touch and Louis was begging to cum, begging to feel Harry, begging to be inside.
“I want it to be two dollars,” Harry begged sweetly. “And I want to do the play, please.”
“God yes,” Louis caved and moaned and nodded. “God, yes, anything you want.”
Harry freed Louis’ swollen dick from his trousers and let out a hot breath over the tip causing Louis to grasp onto his curls, “I knew you’d give me what I wanted, daddy.”
One day as he walked in to pick Harry up from his play practice he noticed a tall shadowy figure standing at the back of the auditorium. He was smoking a cigarette and Louis’ eyes grew wide. It couldn’t be…
“Hi Mr. Tomlinson,” one of Harry’s young friends smiled up at him.
It was young Nick Grimshaw. He was one of the few people Louis actually let Harry spend time with. Mostly because Harry had assured Louis that Nick had a girlfriend and couldn’t be bothered with him half the time. Louis replied back genially. He kept his eyes focused on the figure in the back.
“What are you looking at Mr. Malik for?” Nick asked him.
Louis was startled and looked back down at Nick, “Oh, I um, I just knew I saw him from somewhere. What is he doing here?”
“He wrote this play,” Nick said proudly. “We’re very lucky to have him. He was very particular about having Harry play the lead role too. He said he’d be perfect for it.”
“Did he now…” Louis replied suspiciously.
He should have known it was Zayn. That should have been his first clue. What did he want with Harry? Why did he insist on having him everywhere he went? Ever since the hotel he couldn’t seem to shake this man. He immediately pulled Harry out and insisted they needed to go home. The sooner he got Harry away from Zayn the better. Harry kicked and screamed at Louis the whole way home. Louis knew it was wrong but he couldn’t let someone else take Harry away from him. He wouldn’t allow it.
Harry grew less aroused by Louis. He would fight him, and he would scream at Louis that he was a pervert and that he wasn’t allowed to touch him. Louis was perplexed. He had been paying Harry for the past few weeks. Harry demanded that if he had to blow him he deserved to be paid for it at least. But Harry became more greedy and wanted more money. Money that he didn’t actually earn. He’d smack Louis mercilessly just for a few coins. He insisted he needed it for something important and refused to tell Louis just what it was for.
He came in the living room one day to see Harry reading another one of his magazines and he barely looked up when Louis came in.
“How have your piano lessons been going?”
“Really, really well actually,” Harry nodded. “I’ve gotten quite good. Maybe I’ll be better than you.”
“That’s funny, considering you’ve skipped the last two classes,” Louis pursed his lips.
Harry looked to the side and then replied coolly, “I was in the park with Nick. We were rehearsing for the play. Nick needed help with his lines and I figured I’d help him.”
Louis mulled this over before replying, “Give me his number.”
Harry gulped, “You want…Nick’s phone number.”
“Yes, I do,” Louis nodded.
Harry gave it to him with a very annoyed look on his face. He got up to the kitchen and came back with a glass of milk by the time Nick’s mother had given the phone to him.
“Hello Mr. Tomlinson!” Nick replied cheerily. “Anything I can do for you?”
“Yeah, there is, actually,” Louis said. “Harry’s been skipping out on piano rehearsals for the past two weeks. He says that he was with you in the park rehearsing lines for the play.”
“That’s true,” he could sense Nick’s fear through the phone. “You see, we didn’t want to tell you because we figured you’d be mad and say no. But I’ve been having a lot of trouble and the play is coming up soon and I-“
Louis hung up the phone sparing himself from the petty rehearsed story.
“Did he confirm?” Harry asked starkly.
Louis sighed and replied, “Yes, he did. And I have no doubt he was well instructed by you.”
He pushed Harry’s legs off the table and Harry gave him a bewildered look, “Whatever game you’re playing, Harry, you can’t play it with me. I won’t let you.”
Harry raised his eyebrows and put his legs back up on the table, “I thought you liked games.”
Louis knocked his legs off again causing Harry to spill his milk on himself and he jumped up and shouted, “Hey, easy mister!”
Louis grabbed ahold of his arms, “What do you think you’re doing? Trying to run away from me?”
“Get away from me you pervert!” Harry screeched at him. “Anyone would try and run away from you, you sick pedophile.”
“You show me every penny you’ve earned!” Louis roared at the younger boy, shaking him furiously by the wrists.
“I earned that money!” Harry screamed in his face.
Louis struck him across the face, regretting it almost instantly. Harry fell into the chair and held onto his red cheek. Looking up at Louis in pure horror the tears began to pour from his eyes. And Louis tried to reach out to touch him but Harry slapped him away. He stood there for a moment his eyes bearing into Louis’. He refused to look away.
He composed himself before replying firmly, “Go ahead. Murder me. Murder me like you murdered my mother.”
“Harry, I’m sorry I-“
“Murder me like you murdered my mother, murder me! Go on and murder me!” Harry’s voice began getting louder and shriller and Louis begged him to stop, implored him to listen.
“Murder me, murder me, murder me,” Harry screamed through sobs whacking Louis on the arms. “Fucking murder me!”
He ran away from him and screamed hysterically running down the stairs leading out of their apartment. Louis sprinted after him begging for him to stop and trying to apologize. Harry wouldn’t listen, he refused to listen, and he just kept running and screaming. Neighbors were peering out of their doors asking Louis what was wrong but Louis just ignored them. Louis was trying to gain on him but he sped around the corner faster than Louis’ legs could carry him. It was pouring down rain now and Louis could hardly see his hand in front of him.
He prayed to some God above that Harry hadn’t contacted the police. That Harry wouldn’t be that cruel, that Harry wouldn’t defy him like that. But he knew it was too late for him. He was sick. He needed professional help and he was going to get it soon enough. He wanted Harry for his own but then he realized that no one could have Harry. It was almost like trying to catch smoke with your bare hands.
By some miracle he found Harry sitting inside an ice cream parlor, the same one he and Louis frequented. He let out a sigh of relief as Harry came bouncing up to him. He had the goofiest grin on his face, the familiar grin that Louis was used to. Louis looked at him with his mouth agape. Surely this wasn’t the same Harry that he had just been screamed at by an hour ago?
“Dad there you are!” Harry was good at faking happiness. “I was just about to come looking for you. I wanted some ice cream, my throat’s sore.”
Louis nodded and smiled nervously at the woman who was behind the counter. He ordered Harry his ice cream and watched the boy eat it in silence. He didn’t know where to go from here. He didn’t know what was going to happen to them. He was sick of Harry’s sudden mood swings. One moment he would be angry; screaming and slapping Louis. The next he could be so affectionate; kissing Louis sweetly and saying how much he loved him and was so glad he had him. But what happened when one day that all stopped? He woke up and Harry was gone?
As they left the ice cream shop and walked down the street together Harry wrapped his arm around Louis. And Louis returned the favor, smiling down at the little boy. Harry smiled back up at him.
“Let’s blow this joint,” he said suddenly.
“And go where?” Louis grinned down at him.
“Anywhere I want to,” Harry demanded with a smile. “I want to travel the states. I’ve always wanted to but mom was too crabby. She drank too much and she couldn’t drive.”
“I’ll take you anywhere you want,” Louis assured him.
The next day they hit the road at noon. Harry drew all over the map in red pen, marking the places he wanted to go and smiling and kissing Louis profusely. He felt relieved to have his little boy back. Harry seemed more than pleased to be back in the car. Louis decided that Harry was born to travel. He must not have lived much outside of Ramsdale and there was a whole world to see.
But halfway through his anxiety took hold. He was worried about a blue sedan that had been following them for quite some time. He lit a cigarette. He rarely did this around Harry but he was too anxious and worried and he didn’t want to startle him. He tried not to think the worst of the situation. But if someone was following them they had to know about him and Harry. He couldn’t be put away now.
“Harry, reach into the glove box and get out the pad of paper,” he instructed.
Harry didn’t question why this time and did as he was told. On command he wrote down the license plate number: Conn PJ44396
“What’s this for?” Harry asked.
Louis grabbed it out of his hands and inspected it, “I think that car’s following us.”
Harry turned around, “What makes you say that?”
“It’s been behind us for three hours,” Louis sighed.
After a while the car was nowhere to be seen. Louis needed to get gas and stopped at the nearest gas station he could find. He instructed Harry to stay in the car and not speak to anyone. He was inside browsing for various candies and snacks he thought Harry might like. When he peered out again he saw Harry talking to a man in a hat. And he gasped when he saw that man had a cigarette. He threw the snacks down on the ground and sprinted out to the car. He looked around and saw that there was no blue sedan, no man with a cigarette. He was perplexed.
He got into the car and Harry was singing along obnoxiously loudly to some song on the radio and Louis asked him hastily, “Harry, who was that guy? What did he want?”
Harry didn’t answer and just kept singing. Louis reached across him and angrily slammed the door and turned off the radio. Harry turned it back on almost instantly.
“Harry, answer me!” Louis demanded. “What did that man want?”
Harry rolled his eyes, “Calm down. He was lost and he just needed a map. He was probably a traveler and had no idea where he was.”
“You gave him our map?” Louis had to keep himself from shouting.
“Yeah, what other map would I have given him? Besides, I know where I want to go. And it’s more fun this way. We just kind of keep driving aimlessly-“
“Harry, what did I tell you about talking to strangers?” Louis scolded.
“But he was nice,” Harry sighed. “I don’t get the big deal, dad.”
They had a flat. They were in a forest, alone, with a flat tire. Louis wanted to scream at the misfortune. But he wanted to scream even more when he saw what was coming his way. A blue sedan, smoke pouring out of the windows. Louis began to run up to the car, but just as he came close the car began to back away quickly. He turned around again when he heard a yell and saw the car was lunging down the hill.
“Oh no,” he gasped.
He ran back and saw Harry in the front seat guiding the wheel. He looked over at Louis frantically and Louis told him to pull the emergency brake. Eventually the car was stopped, the tire fixed, and Louis could rest easy for now. Once they were on the road again he remembered the blue sedan. Who could that possibly be, in the car? Who wanted to catch him? Was it Harry they were after or was it him? His mind was racing with thoughts.
“Harry, let me see the pad of paper with the numbers and letters,” Louis asked Harry later as they were driving through barren desert lands.
He had no idea where they were but Harry didn’t seem to mind. He preferred not knowing where they were going. It just made Louis more anxious. Harry rolled his eyes and handed it to Louis. Louis flipped it open and saw that what was written previously had been erased and written over.
“Wha-What have you done?” Louis necessitated.
He jerked the car over to the shoulder of the road and looked at the back of Harry’s head for a moment. He was so angry he could barely see. What was Harry playing at? Why was he always toying with Louis’ mind like this?
“Harry,” Louis called to him through a shaky voice.
Slowly Harry turned his head to look at him. He looked blank and Louis was thankful, because if he had been smug he would have been thrashed. He slapped Harry square across the cheek. Harry looked shocked as he turned to look up at Louis, cradling his stinging cheek in his hand. He began to cry and threw open the car door and ran as fast as his little legs could carry him. Louis wasn’t far behind, apologizing and frantic.
He tried to hold Harry in his arms but Harry just screamed, “Get away!”
He finally allowed Louis to hold him. Sobbing into his chest and begging for Louis to let him go. He hugged him back, though. Louis rested his chin upon the young boy’s head, begging for forgiveness and promising for it to never happen again. He didn’t want Harry to leave him. He couldn’t be without Harry. He refused.
In another hotel Louis said he was going to walk down the street to the store and get Harry some fruit. Harry insisted on bananas. Naturally, he was gone longer than he expected. The line was long and people would stop and make casual, pointless conversations with him. He shuddered to think of what Harry was getting up to while he was away. He wanted Harry to be faithful, he told Harry to be faithful. He was a fool to think that Harry would really listen to what he had to say.
And when he arrived, bag of bananas in hand, he saw the bed that he had left Harry in was messy, clothes discarded and he peeked around the doorway of the adjoining room and saw Harry sitting on the bed. He was naked besides the large, oversized white shirt he had borrowed. Louis recognized it to be his own. Harry’s hair was a mess. He had a wet face and he looked like he’d just been through a windstorm. Louis wasn’t stupid, he knew what he had done.
“Harry, did you leave while I was gone?”
“No,” Harry shook his head, caught in a lie. “I’ve been here the whole time.”
“Don’t lie to me,” Louis replied as calmly as he can.
“Well, I did step out for a minute,” Harry replied softly. “It’s just you were gone for so long and I wanted to see if you were coming back.”
“Who is he?” Louis pressed.
Harry let out a chuckle, “Who’s who? What are you talking about?”
Louis through the bag of bananas on the ground and slipped on them carelessly and fell on top of Harry. He began to cry, tears streaking the white shirt and Harry’s face. Harry just laughed at him, he was as cruel as a child on the playground. He begged into Harry’s neck, he wanted to know who he was. Harry unbuttoned Louis’ pants, spreading his legs and allowing Louis an easier access. He gasped as Louis entered him, barely thrusting. Louis was still crying and Harry just remained laughing at him, and Louis could tell he didn’t even have an erection. He was just doing this to tease Louis. Louis let out a strangled cry as he came, begging Harry to tell him.
“Please, Harry, please,” Louis gasped through tears. “Who is he?”
Harry just laughed. He didn’t stop laughing. And he never told Louis. They never spoke of it again they didn’t have time. They were on the road again the next day. They didn’t speak until nightfall and when they arrived at the next motel Harry didn’t look well at all. He was pale and shaking and the woman at the check-in counter insisted that Harry be taken to the hospital. This was the last thing Louis wanted to do, but Harry began to vomit and whined that his stomach was hurting.
The doctors insisted it was nothing serious but they’d have to keep Harry overnight. They refused Louis’ offer to stay with him for the night and sent him to stay at a motel just down the road. It was his first night without Harry and it was full of nightmares. He constantly reached across the bed for a warm, soft body but it wasn’t there. He woke up early the next morning. He had to see Harry. He couldn’t bear the thought of another second without him.
“Hello?” The warm receptionist answered.
“Hi, this is Mr. Tomlinson, just calling about Harry Styles. I’m on my way to pick him up so-“
“Oh, sir, that’s not really necessary. He already left about half an hour ago,” the woman’s kindness practically oozed through the phone.
“With whom?” Louis practically shouted.
“He said he was his uncle. He came in a blue sedan. He was smoking a cigarette and he had nice brown eyes and dark hair. He had a little dog with him too, oh he was so nice. He was so polite,” she gushed.
Louis hung up the phone. It couldn’t be Zayn Malik. What was he after Harry for? He couldn’t believe they would just let him leave with some stranger. He sped to the hospital and sprinted inside, still wearing his pajamas. He peered in the hospital room he had last seen Harry in and it was completely empty. He saw the doctor down the hall by the front desk and ran to him. He knocked him over on the ground and grabbed him by the throat. He slammed his head into the concrete floor without mercy.
“Where is he,” Louis growled. “Where. Is. My. Son.”
Two men in white came out and detained Louis. Demanding he needed to be taken to the mental ward. Louis fought them viciously. Kicking out his feet and legs, trying to bite at their hands and arms. Suddenly he stopped when he looked out the window. He saw two police officers. He quickly calmed down much to the dismay of everyone around him. He apologized profusely insisting that it was early morning and he was worried about his son. He told he forgot his brother was coming to pick him up. They let him go after several mental tests.
After this Louis began searching at various hotels and rest stops. Asking if anyone had seen people looking like Harry. He wasn’t sure what Zayn had done with him or where he had taken him. But if anything were to happen to Harry, Louis would be entirely responsible.
And one day he just gave up. He realized that maybe Harry didn’t want to be found. Even though the names in the registries would change, the handwriting never did. He should have known he was only a temporary lover, someone Harry would use for pleasure when he needed it. But he knew one thing; he would love Harry until the day he died. He could never forget Harry. He wouldn’t allow himself.
Five Years Later
He received a letter in the mail one day. He felt like he was in a bad dream when he saw it was addressed to him from Mr. Harry Styles. He took a deep breath before reading:
Dear Dad,
Hi. I know it’s been so long since we’ve spoken. But I’m in desperate need of your help. I didn’t know if you knew this, but I’m married now. I’ve been married to Caroline for almost a year now, and she’s just great. But we’re struggling with our money. We’re in so much debt and I can’t find any way to get out. I’m working, and so is she. But what makes this even worse is that Caroline’s pregnant. The baby should be here within the next few months and if we get no money by then I’m not really sure what we’ll do. You don’t have to do this, Dad, if you don’t want. I know I probably broke your heart. But I need you.
Sincerely,
Harry
Louis pressed the letter into his chest and let out a loud cry. Harry had moved on. He was with someone else, a woman, and she was with child. This made it even worse. He couldn’t see Harry, he didn’t think he could bear it. But he wanted to give Harry a good life. He wanted Harry to be happy. God knows he’d robbed him of enough already. He couldn’t let another child go to ruin.
The house Harry owned was small, made out of wood, and looked something out an old western film. He was greeted by a large border collie. He knocked on the door and his hands shook nervously as he waited to be let in. When he looked up he was face to face with Harry. He was almost unrecognizable. His curls were as unruly as always, but he was taller. He had broad shoulders and kind, soft green eyes. He looked like a man and Louis found himself completely spellbound once again. Harry smiled at him and he saw the familiar dimples that he loved so much.
“Hi, dad, I didn’t think you would come,” Harry’s voice was so much deeper. “Come on in.”
The house was dirty and unorganized. And Harry looked around anxiously, judging his own house for himself. Louis kept looking at his long torso, his collar bones protruding. He was almost miserable just looking at him. He invited him to sit on the couch with him. Louis sat as far away as he could.
“Where’s your wife?” Louis asked.
“She’s outside feeding the chickens,” Harry grinned. “I think we’re gonna have to sell them. We’re really fucked.”
Louis let out a puff of air, “Harry, this was really…really short notice and I-“
“I know, dad, I know,” Harry nodded. “I get it. I didn’t know who else to call. I don’t have anyone else. You’re basically the only family I have. No one else knows where I went, y’know. So it’d be a shot in the dark calling anyone else. Besides, who else would give it to me?”
“You think I will?” Louis raised his eyebrows.
Harry smirked, “Of course you will.”
Louis began to think. He wanted Harry. He wanted Harry from the moment he first saw him, and he wanted him now. He didn’t care that Harry was a man and that he probably had enough.
Before Louis could stop himself, “Haz, where did you go?”
Harry looked a bit guilty and he scratched the back of his neck, “It was Zayn Malik, dad. I was waiting for you to pick up on that.”
He lit a cigarette as Louis eyed him, “Why did you go?”
“God, he was a dream, practically,” Harry sighed. “He was the only man I was ever crazy about.”
“What about me?” Louis blanched.
Harry didn’t answer, instead he stood up and paced back and forth, blowing smoke and looking uneasy.
“You know what he did?” Harry asked, and Louis shook his head. “He filmed stuff. I had no idea. Sometimes it was with two boys, sometimes two girls. Sometimes it was with himself. And sometimes it was with four men, even. And I remember I said to him one day ‘No I will not blow all those beastly men’. I wanted you. And so he threw me out.”
They grinned at each other for a moment. And Louis was dumbstruck. Even when he was doing all those things, Louis was still on his mind. Harry hadn’t forgotten about him. He loved him, he must have.
“Harry, it’s 25 paces out to the car from your front porch,” he wet his lips and nervously continued. “Make those 25 paces with me. Be with me.”
“What? You want to take me to a motel or something?” Harry snorted.
“No,” Louis said. “Die with me, live with me, be my everything with me.”
“What is this about the money?”
“Even if you say no, I’ll still give you the money,” Louis nodded.
“Really?” Harry was in awe.
“Yes, of course,” He pulled out the envelope addressed to Harold and handed it to him.
Harry opened it while smiling widely at Louis. He pulled out the four stacks of money. They were all labeled with $1000. Harry gasped.
“You’re giving us four thousand dollars?”
He reached out to embrace Louis but Louis jerked away, “Don’t touch me, please. I’ll die if you touch me.”
Harry looked at him apologetically, “I’m…I’m really sorry, Dad. But…I can’t. You should move on, be happy. Find someone like I did”
“Easy for you to say,” Louis spat.
“Dad, really, thanks for the money. I…I really appreciate it.”
Louis nodded back, “It was no trouble, Harry.”
“Dad,” Harry stopped him as he began to walk back to the car. “Louis…do you still love me?”
Louis’ voice caught in his throat, “I couldn’t stop loving you. I’ve never loved anyone like I love you. I want you to love me like this. But you won’t, you can’t. I love you more than I’ve loved anything in my whole life.”
Harry watched him as he walked back to the car and waved furiously at him as he backed away. And he felt a tear slide from his eyes. He was gone. Harry was someone else’s now. But he knew what he had to do. He had to find Zayn Malik. This was all Zayn’s fault and Louis was going to kill him for it.
When he arrived at Zayn’s mansion he felt the venom pulse through his whole body. He kept the gun he had brought with him hidden in his breast pocket. He walked in without being invited. The entire place was dark, just like Zayn. Zayn was a dark figure, he was mysterious and sick. Louis walked into the parlor and found Zayn standing there in a robe smoking a cigarette. Zayn peered at him curiously. He felt disgusted just standing with him.
“Are you Bruce?” Zayn asked. “You look a little too…pale to be Bruce.”
“No,” Louis answered. “You don’t know who I am?”
Zayn looked him up and down and sat down in a chair facing him, “Well, no, I don’t.”
“Try Louis Tomlinson,” Louis snapped.
Zayn let out a loud laugh, “Well I’ll be damned. What took you so long, Tomlinson?”
“You took him from me,” Louis’ voice quivered in anger.
“He wanted to go,” Zayn said simply with a shrug. “He had enough. Who can blame him, really. He needed some real men.”
“You’re going to die, don’t you know that?” Louis hissed.
Zayn looked up at him, “Oh? Why? Because I proved to be a better lover?”
Louis pulled out the gun, “I know what you did, Malik. You’re sicker than the rest of us.”
Zayn stood up instantly and his eyes grew wide and he held up his hands, “Why?”
“You took advantage of me. You took advantage of Harry,” Louis said. “You took him away from me because you scared me. You played games with me. You took advantage of a little boy and tried to make him some sort of…sex slave? He was safe in my hands.”
“Like what you did was so much better,” Zayn sneered.
Louis pressed the trigger. A bullet was lodged into Zayn’s chest. Louis fired again, impaling random parts of Zayn’s body. Zayn staggered past him and Louis followed. He shot him once more in the back, causing Zayn to fall to the ground. Zayn crawled to a vacant bed by the window. He bloodied the white sheets. His entire face covered in blood and Louis was bewildered that he managed to even still be alive. It felt good to watch him suffer. It felt good to make him feel pain. He wanted him to die, he wanted him to see just how it felt to have to lose something special to you.
“Get out of here,” Zayn shouted at him. “Get out of here!”
Louis shot him in the chest again. And this time, Zayn fell back and his chest stopped moving. He had succeeded. Louis didn’t care about the blood on his face or the gun he was still carrying. He got back into his car and drove away. He had made up for it, he thought. Zayn was sicker than anyone he’d ever met, even himself. And he swerved all over the road, too careless to think about the possibility of getting pulled over by the police. Careless to think about the possibility of being charged with the murder of Zayn Malik.
Harry died Christmas Day in an automobile wreck on the way to the hospital with his wife to give birth to their child.
Louis died of a heart attack in jail just a short week later.
Rating: NC-17
Length: 5, 667
Fandom: One Direction
Characters: Louis Tomlinson, Harry Styles, Zayn Malik, Nick Grimshaw,
Ships: Louis/Harry, Harry/Zayn,
Notes: Based off of the novel Lolita by Vladimir Nabokov. (the next few parts will be much longer)
Summary: Harry, light of my life, fire of my loins. My sin, my soul...
After a while Louis began to see the old shine that Harry would get in his eyes whenever he came around was fading. He seemed almost unimpressed by Louis’ presence. No amount of food or toys Louis bought him could make Harry happy. He realized he was depriving Harry of his boyhood. When they’d drive through towns they’d see other children at play on the sidewalk, laughing and happy, and Harry would just sigh and scowl at Louis. Louis was guilty. He had turned Harry into his own personal play thing and had forgotten entirely that Harry was still a child.
They would sit in the rocker together, Harry reading his newspaper, his hair still dripping from his shower and his tiny legs stretched over Louis’. Louis would move Harry so he was positioned perfectly. He’d ease his way inside of him causing Harry to gasp in pleasure pain. He would throw his head back and lay it against Louis’ chest. Moaning and pumping his own hips so Louis was angled inside of him perfectly. And Louis knew this should dirty, he knew he was going to Hell and he knew he was a bad person. But it just felt so good getting Harry off, just from his cock. It felt so good to fill him up and tell him just how beautiful he was.
He decided to enroll him in Beardsley, a prestigious private school with an enriched background in the fine arts. Harry liked to sing, in fact, he was very good at it. He liked to dance and he liked to draw. He had a lot of talent just waiting to be exposed. But Louis rarely let him stay after school for any type of functions. He was weary about Harry’s flirtatious side. The heads of the school were well aware of it and encouraged Louis to let Harry date. Louis was appalled, the thought of Harry going out with some pretty little girl. He demanded Harry stay home.
Most people thought this was just Louis being a protective old fashioned father. They were completely unaware of what he was really keeping Harry home for. They were unaware of what he really wanted for Harry. And Harry was catching on. He knew how to make Louis do whatever he wanted. With just the right flick of his tongue and the perfect movement of his hips and hands he could make Louis like putty in his hands.
“You know how my allowance is a dollar every Friday?” Harry asked Louis one day as he was picking at his cuticles and Louis was reading the newspaper.
“Yes,” Louis replied tersely.
“Well, I really think it should be two dollars,” Harry suggested innocently.
“I think it should just stay a dollar,” Louis wasn’t giving up this easy.
Harry crawled over to Louis’ lap and slowly began to drag his hands across Louis’ thighs. Louis let out a deep groan and peered over at the younger boy below him. Harry’s eyes were devious. He was a wild one and Louis couldn’t take it anymore.
“A dollar fifty,” Louis said weakly.
“Is that all I get?” Harry whispered. “Is that all you’re gonna give me daddy?”
He palmed him through his trousers, running his hot mouth along Louis’ thighs. Louis gasped and bit his lip. He hated when Harry did this, he just wanted to bend him over the desk and take him right there. He wanted to make Harry beg for him instead. Harry was mischievously smirking up at him; he knew just what he was doing. Just the right touch and Louis was begging to cum, begging to feel Harry, begging to be inside.
“I want it to be two dollars,” Harry begged sweetly. “And I want to do the play, please.”
“God yes,” Louis caved and moaned and nodded. “God, yes, anything you want.”
Harry freed Louis’ swollen dick from his trousers and let out a hot breath over the tip causing Louis to grasp onto his curls, “I knew you’d give me what I wanted, daddy.”
One day as he walked in to pick Harry up from his play practice he noticed a tall shadowy figure standing at the back of the auditorium. He was smoking a cigarette and Louis’ eyes grew wide. It couldn’t be…
“Hi Mr. Tomlinson,” one of Harry’s young friends smiled up at him.
It was young Nick Grimshaw. He was one of the few people Louis actually let Harry spend time with. Mostly because Harry had assured Louis that Nick had a girlfriend and couldn’t be bothered with him half the time. Louis replied back genially. He kept his eyes focused on the figure in the back.
“What are you looking at Mr. Malik for?” Nick asked him.
Louis was startled and looked back down at Nick, “Oh, I um, I just knew I saw him from somewhere. What is he doing here?”
“He wrote this play,” Nick said proudly. “We’re very lucky to have him. He was very particular about having Harry play the lead role too. He said he’d be perfect for it.”
“Did he now…” Louis replied suspiciously.
He should have known it was Zayn. That should have been his first clue. What did he want with Harry? Why did he insist on having him everywhere he went? Ever since the hotel he couldn’t seem to shake this man. He immediately pulled Harry out and insisted they needed to go home. The sooner he got Harry away from Zayn the better. Harry kicked and screamed at Louis the whole way home. Louis knew it was wrong but he couldn’t let someone else take Harry away from him. He wouldn’t allow it.
Harry grew less aroused by Louis. He would fight him, and he would scream at Louis that he was a pervert and that he wasn’t allowed to touch him. Louis was perplexed. He had been paying Harry for the past few weeks. Harry demanded that if he had to blow him he deserved to be paid for it at least. But Harry became more greedy and wanted more money. Money that he didn’t actually earn. He’d smack Louis mercilessly just for a few coins. He insisted he needed it for something important and refused to tell Louis just what it was for.
He came in the living room one day to see Harry reading another one of his magazines and he barely looked up when Louis came in.
“How have your piano lessons been going?”
“Really, really well actually,” Harry nodded. “I’ve gotten quite good. Maybe I’ll be better than you.”
“That’s funny, considering you’ve skipped the last two classes,” Louis pursed his lips.
Harry looked to the side and then replied coolly, “I was in the park with Nick. We were rehearsing for the play. Nick needed help with his lines and I figured I’d help him.”
Louis mulled this over before replying, “Give me his number.”
Harry gulped, “You want…Nick’s phone number.”
“Yes, I do,” Louis nodded.
Harry gave it to him with a very annoyed look on his face. He got up to the kitchen and came back with a glass of milk by the time Nick’s mother had given the phone to him.
“Hello Mr. Tomlinson!” Nick replied cheerily. “Anything I can do for you?”
“Yeah, there is, actually,” Louis said. “Harry’s been skipping out on piano rehearsals for the past two weeks. He says that he was with you in the park rehearsing lines for the play.”
“That’s true,” he could sense Nick’s fear through the phone. “You see, we didn’t want to tell you because we figured you’d be mad and say no. But I’ve been having a lot of trouble and the play is coming up soon and I-“
Louis hung up the phone sparing himself from the petty rehearsed story.
“Did he confirm?” Harry asked starkly.
Louis sighed and replied, “Yes, he did. And I have no doubt he was well instructed by you.”
He pushed Harry’s legs off the table and Harry gave him a bewildered look, “Whatever game you’re playing, Harry, you can’t play it with me. I won’t let you.”
Harry raised his eyebrows and put his legs back up on the table, “I thought you liked games.”
Louis knocked his legs off again causing Harry to spill his milk on himself and he jumped up and shouted, “Hey, easy mister!”
Louis grabbed ahold of his arms, “What do you think you’re doing? Trying to run away from me?”
“Get away from me you pervert!” Harry screeched at him. “Anyone would try and run away from you, you sick pedophile.”
“You show me every penny you’ve earned!” Louis roared at the younger boy, shaking him furiously by the wrists.
“I earned that money!” Harry screamed in his face.
Louis struck him across the face, regretting it almost instantly. Harry fell into the chair and held onto his red cheek. Looking up at Louis in pure horror the tears began to pour from his eyes. And Louis tried to reach out to touch him but Harry slapped him away. He stood there for a moment his eyes bearing into Louis’. He refused to look away.
He composed himself before replying firmly, “Go ahead. Murder me. Murder me like you murdered my mother.”
“Harry, I’m sorry I-“
“Murder me like you murdered my mother, murder me! Go on and murder me!” Harry’s voice began getting louder and shriller and Louis begged him to stop, implored him to listen.
“Murder me, murder me, murder me,” Harry screamed through sobs whacking Louis on the arms. “Fucking murder me!”
He ran away from him and screamed hysterically running down the stairs leading out of their apartment. Louis sprinted after him begging for him to stop and trying to apologize. Harry wouldn’t listen, he refused to listen, and he just kept running and screaming. Neighbors were peering out of their doors asking Louis what was wrong but Louis just ignored them. Louis was trying to gain on him but he sped around the corner faster than Louis’ legs could carry him. It was pouring down rain now and Louis could hardly see his hand in front of him.
He prayed to some God above that Harry hadn’t contacted the police. That Harry wouldn’t be that cruel, that Harry wouldn’t defy him like that. But he knew it was too late for him. He was sick. He needed professional help and he was going to get it soon enough. He wanted Harry for his own but then he realized that no one could have Harry. It was almost like trying to catch smoke with your bare hands.
By some miracle he found Harry sitting inside an ice cream parlor, the same one he and Louis frequented. He let out a sigh of relief as Harry came bouncing up to him. He had the goofiest grin on his face, the familiar grin that Louis was used to. Louis looked at him with his mouth agape. Surely this wasn’t the same Harry that he had just been screamed at by an hour ago?
“Dad there you are!” Harry was good at faking happiness. “I was just about to come looking for you. I wanted some ice cream, my throat’s sore.”
Louis nodded and smiled nervously at the woman who was behind the counter. He ordered Harry his ice cream and watched the boy eat it in silence. He didn’t know where to go from here. He didn’t know what was going to happen to them. He was sick of Harry’s sudden mood swings. One moment he would be angry; screaming and slapping Louis. The next he could be so affectionate; kissing Louis sweetly and saying how much he loved him and was so glad he had him. But what happened when one day that all stopped? He woke up and Harry was gone?
As they left the ice cream shop and walked down the street together Harry wrapped his arm around Louis. And Louis returned the favor, smiling down at the little boy. Harry smiled back up at him.
“Let’s blow this joint,” he said suddenly.
“And go where?” Louis grinned down at him.
“Anywhere I want to,” Harry demanded with a smile. “I want to travel the states. I’ve always wanted to but mom was too crabby. She drank too much and she couldn’t drive.”
“I’ll take you anywhere you want,” Louis assured him.
The next day they hit the road at noon. Harry drew all over the map in red pen, marking the places he wanted to go and smiling and kissing Louis profusely. He felt relieved to have his little boy back. Harry seemed more than pleased to be back in the car. Louis decided that Harry was born to travel. He must not have lived much outside of Ramsdale and there was a whole world to see.
But halfway through his anxiety took hold. He was worried about a blue sedan that had been following them for quite some time. He lit a cigarette. He rarely did this around Harry but he was too anxious and worried and he didn’t want to startle him. He tried not to think the worst of the situation. But if someone was following them they had to know about him and Harry. He couldn’t be put away now.
“Harry, reach into the glove box and get out the pad of paper,” he instructed.
Harry didn’t question why this time and did as he was told. On command he wrote down the license plate number: Conn PJ44396
“What’s this for?” Harry asked.
Louis grabbed it out of his hands and inspected it, “I think that car’s following us.”
Harry turned around, “What makes you say that?”
“It’s been behind us for three hours,” Louis sighed.
After a while the car was nowhere to be seen. Louis needed to get gas and stopped at the nearest gas station he could find. He instructed Harry to stay in the car and not speak to anyone. He was inside browsing for various candies and snacks he thought Harry might like. When he peered out again he saw Harry talking to a man in a hat. And he gasped when he saw that man had a cigarette. He threw the snacks down on the ground and sprinted out to the car. He looked around and saw that there was no blue sedan, no man with a cigarette. He was perplexed.
He got into the car and Harry was singing along obnoxiously loudly to some song on the radio and Louis asked him hastily, “Harry, who was that guy? What did he want?”
Harry didn’t answer and just kept singing. Louis reached across him and angrily slammed the door and turned off the radio. Harry turned it back on almost instantly.
“Harry, answer me!” Louis demanded. “What did that man want?”
Harry rolled his eyes, “Calm down. He was lost and he just needed a map. He was probably a traveler and had no idea where he was.”
“You gave him our map?” Louis had to keep himself from shouting.
“Yeah, what other map would I have given him? Besides, I know where I want to go. And it’s more fun this way. We just kind of keep driving aimlessly-“
“Harry, what did I tell you about talking to strangers?” Louis scolded.
“But he was nice,” Harry sighed. “I don’t get the big deal, dad.”
They had a flat. They were in a forest, alone, with a flat tire. Louis wanted to scream at the misfortune. But he wanted to scream even more when he saw what was coming his way. A blue sedan, smoke pouring out of the windows. Louis began to run up to the car, but just as he came close the car began to back away quickly. He turned around again when he heard a yell and saw the car was lunging down the hill.
“Oh no,” he gasped.
He ran back and saw Harry in the front seat guiding the wheel. He looked over at Louis frantically and Louis told him to pull the emergency brake. Eventually the car was stopped, the tire fixed, and Louis could rest easy for now. Once they were on the road again he remembered the blue sedan. Who could that possibly be, in the car? Who wanted to catch him? Was it Harry they were after or was it him? His mind was racing with thoughts.
“Harry, let me see the pad of paper with the numbers and letters,” Louis asked Harry later as they were driving through barren desert lands.
He had no idea where they were but Harry didn’t seem to mind. He preferred not knowing where they were going. It just made Louis more anxious. Harry rolled his eyes and handed it to Louis. Louis flipped it open and saw that what was written previously had been erased and written over.
“Wha-What have you done?” Louis necessitated.
He jerked the car over to the shoulder of the road and looked at the back of Harry’s head for a moment. He was so angry he could barely see. What was Harry playing at? Why was he always toying with Louis’ mind like this?
“Harry,” Louis called to him through a shaky voice.
Slowly Harry turned his head to look at him. He looked blank and Louis was thankful, because if he had been smug he would have been thrashed. He slapped Harry square across the cheek. Harry looked shocked as he turned to look up at Louis, cradling his stinging cheek in his hand. He began to cry and threw open the car door and ran as fast as his little legs could carry him. Louis wasn’t far behind, apologizing and frantic.
He tried to hold Harry in his arms but Harry just screamed, “Get away!”
He finally allowed Louis to hold him. Sobbing into his chest and begging for Louis to let him go. He hugged him back, though. Louis rested his chin upon the young boy’s head, begging for forgiveness and promising for it to never happen again. He didn’t want Harry to leave him. He couldn’t be without Harry. He refused.
In another hotel Louis said he was going to walk down the street to the store and get Harry some fruit. Harry insisted on bananas. Naturally, he was gone longer than he expected. The line was long and people would stop and make casual, pointless conversations with him. He shuddered to think of what Harry was getting up to while he was away. He wanted Harry to be faithful, he told Harry to be faithful. He was a fool to think that Harry would really listen to what he had to say.
And when he arrived, bag of bananas in hand, he saw the bed that he had left Harry in was messy, clothes discarded and he peeked around the doorway of the adjoining room and saw Harry sitting on the bed. He was naked besides the large, oversized white shirt he had borrowed. Louis recognized it to be his own. Harry’s hair was a mess. He had a wet face and he looked like he’d just been through a windstorm. Louis wasn’t stupid, he knew what he had done.
“Harry, did you leave while I was gone?”
“No,” Harry shook his head, caught in a lie. “I’ve been here the whole time.”
“Don’t lie to me,” Louis replied as calmly as he can.
“Well, I did step out for a minute,” Harry replied softly. “It’s just you were gone for so long and I wanted to see if you were coming back.”
“Who is he?” Louis pressed.
Harry let out a chuckle, “Who’s who? What are you talking about?”
Louis through the bag of bananas on the ground and slipped on them carelessly and fell on top of Harry. He began to cry, tears streaking the white shirt and Harry’s face. Harry just laughed at him, he was as cruel as a child on the playground. He begged into Harry’s neck, he wanted to know who he was. Harry unbuttoned Louis’ pants, spreading his legs and allowing Louis an easier access. He gasped as Louis entered him, barely thrusting. Louis was still crying and Harry just remained laughing at him, and Louis could tell he didn’t even have an erection. He was just doing this to tease Louis. Louis let out a strangled cry as he came, begging Harry to tell him.
“Please, Harry, please,” Louis gasped through tears. “Who is he?”
Harry just laughed. He didn’t stop laughing. And he never told Louis. They never spoke of it again they didn’t have time. They were on the road again the next day. They didn’t speak until nightfall and when they arrived at the next motel Harry didn’t look well at all. He was pale and shaking and the woman at the check-in counter insisted that Harry be taken to the hospital. This was the last thing Louis wanted to do, but Harry began to vomit and whined that his stomach was hurting.
The doctors insisted it was nothing serious but they’d have to keep Harry overnight. They refused Louis’ offer to stay with him for the night and sent him to stay at a motel just down the road. It was his first night without Harry and it was full of nightmares. He constantly reached across the bed for a warm, soft body but it wasn’t there. He woke up early the next morning. He had to see Harry. He couldn’t bear the thought of another second without him.
“Hello?” The warm receptionist answered.
“Hi, this is Mr. Tomlinson, just calling about Harry Styles. I’m on my way to pick him up so-“
“Oh, sir, that’s not really necessary. He already left about half an hour ago,” the woman’s kindness practically oozed through the phone.
“With whom?” Louis practically shouted.
“He said he was his uncle. He came in a blue sedan. He was smoking a cigarette and he had nice brown eyes and dark hair. He had a little dog with him too, oh he was so nice. He was so polite,” she gushed.
Louis hung up the phone. It couldn’t be Zayn Malik. What was he after Harry for? He couldn’t believe they would just let him leave with some stranger. He sped to the hospital and sprinted inside, still wearing his pajamas. He peered in the hospital room he had last seen Harry in and it was completely empty. He saw the doctor down the hall by the front desk and ran to him. He knocked him over on the ground and grabbed him by the throat. He slammed his head into the concrete floor without mercy.
“Where is he,” Louis growled. “Where. Is. My. Son.”
Two men in white came out and detained Louis. Demanding he needed to be taken to the mental ward. Louis fought them viciously. Kicking out his feet and legs, trying to bite at their hands and arms. Suddenly he stopped when he looked out the window. He saw two police officers. He quickly calmed down much to the dismay of everyone around him. He apologized profusely insisting that it was early morning and he was worried about his son. He told he forgot his brother was coming to pick him up. They let him go after several mental tests.
After this Louis began searching at various hotels and rest stops. Asking if anyone had seen people looking like Harry. He wasn’t sure what Zayn had done with him or where he had taken him. But if anything were to happen to Harry, Louis would be entirely responsible.
And one day he just gave up. He realized that maybe Harry didn’t want to be found. Even though the names in the registries would change, the handwriting never did. He should have known he was only a temporary lover, someone Harry would use for pleasure when he needed it. But he knew one thing; he would love Harry until the day he died. He could never forget Harry. He wouldn’t allow himself.
Five Years Later
He received a letter in the mail one day. He felt like he was in a bad dream when he saw it was addressed to him from Mr. Harry Styles. He took a deep breath before reading:
Dear Dad,
Hi. I know it’s been so long since we’ve spoken. But I’m in desperate need of your help. I didn’t know if you knew this, but I’m married now. I’ve been married to Caroline for almost a year now, and she’s just great. But we’re struggling with our money. We’re in so much debt and I can’t find any way to get out. I’m working, and so is she. But what makes this even worse is that Caroline’s pregnant. The baby should be here within the next few months and if we get no money by then I’m not really sure what we’ll do. You don’t have to do this, Dad, if you don’t want. I know I probably broke your heart. But I need you.
Sincerely,
Harry
Louis pressed the letter into his chest and let out a loud cry. Harry had moved on. He was with someone else, a woman, and she was with child. This made it even worse. He couldn’t see Harry, he didn’t think he could bear it. But he wanted to give Harry a good life. He wanted Harry to be happy. God knows he’d robbed him of enough already. He couldn’t let another child go to ruin.
The house Harry owned was small, made out of wood, and looked something out an old western film. He was greeted by a large border collie. He knocked on the door and his hands shook nervously as he waited to be let in. When he looked up he was face to face with Harry. He was almost unrecognizable. His curls were as unruly as always, but he was taller. He had broad shoulders and kind, soft green eyes. He looked like a man and Louis found himself completely spellbound once again. Harry smiled at him and he saw the familiar dimples that he loved so much.
“Hi, dad, I didn’t think you would come,” Harry’s voice was so much deeper. “Come on in.”
The house was dirty and unorganized. And Harry looked around anxiously, judging his own house for himself. Louis kept looking at his long torso, his collar bones protruding. He was almost miserable just looking at him. He invited him to sit on the couch with him. Louis sat as far away as he could.
“Where’s your wife?” Louis asked.
“She’s outside feeding the chickens,” Harry grinned. “I think we’re gonna have to sell them. We’re really fucked.”
Louis let out a puff of air, “Harry, this was really…really short notice and I-“
“I know, dad, I know,” Harry nodded. “I get it. I didn’t know who else to call. I don’t have anyone else. You’re basically the only family I have. No one else knows where I went, y’know. So it’d be a shot in the dark calling anyone else. Besides, who else would give it to me?”
“You think I will?” Louis raised his eyebrows.
Harry smirked, “Of course you will.”
Louis began to think. He wanted Harry. He wanted Harry from the moment he first saw him, and he wanted him now. He didn’t care that Harry was a man and that he probably had enough.
Before Louis could stop himself, “Haz, where did you go?”
Harry looked a bit guilty and he scratched the back of his neck, “It was Zayn Malik, dad. I was waiting for you to pick up on that.”
He lit a cigarette as Louis eyed him, “Why did you go?”
“God, he was a dream, practically,” Harry sighed. “He was the only man I was ever crazy about.”
“What about me?” Louis blanched.
Harry didn’t answer, instead he stood up and paced back and forth, blowing smoke and looking uneasy.
“You know what he did?” Harry asked, and Louis shook his head. “He filmed stuff. I had no idea. Sometimes it was with two boys, sometimes two girls. Sometimes it was with himself. And sometimes it was with four men, even. And I remember I said to him one day ‘No I will not blow all those beastly men’. I wanted you. And so he threw me out.”
They grinned at each other for a moment. And Louis was dumbstruck. Even when he was doing all those things, Louis was still on his mind. Harry hadn’t forgotten about him. He loved him, he must have.
“Harry, it’s 25 paces out to the car from your front porch,” he wet his lips and nervously continued. “Make those 25 paces with me. Be with me.”
“What? You want to take me to a motel or something?” Harry snorted.
“No,” Louis said. “Die with me, live with me, be my everything with me.”
“What is this about the money?”
“Even if you say no, I’ll still give you the money,” Louis nodded.
“Really?” Harry was in awe.
“Yes, of course,” He pulled out the envelope addressed to Harold and handed it to him.
Harry opened it while smiling widely at Louis. He pulled out the four stacks of money. They were all labeled with $1000. Harry gasped.
“You’re giving us four thousand dollars?”
He reached out to embrace Louis but Louis jerked away, “Don’t touch me, please. I’ll die if you touch me.”
Harry looked at him apologetically, “I’m…I’m really sorry, Dad. But…I can’t. You should move on, be happy. Find someone like I did”
“Easy for you to say,” Louis spat.
“Dad, really, thanks for the money. I…I really appreciate it.”
Louis nodded back, “It was no trouble, Harry.”
“Dad,” Harry stopped him as he began to walk back to the car. “Louis…do you still love me?”
Louis’ voice caught in his throat, “I couldn’t stop loving you. I’ve never loved anyone like I love you. I want you to love me like this. But you won’t, you can’t. I love you more than I’ve loved anything in my whole life.”
Harry watched him as he walked back to the car and waved furiously at him as he backed away. And he felt a tear slide from his eyes. He was gone. Harry was someone else’s now. But he knew what he had to do. He had to find Zayn Malik. This was all Zayn’s fault and Louis was going to kill him for it.
When he arrived at Zayn’s mansion he felt the venom pulse through his whole body. He kept the gun he had brought with him hidden in his breast pocket. He walked in without being invited. The entire place was dark, just like Zayn. Zayn was a dark figure, he was mysterious and sick. Louis walked into the parlor and found Zayn standing there in a robe smoking a cigarette. Zayn peered at him curiously. He felt disgusted just standing with him.
“Are you Bruce?” Zayn asked. “You look a little too…pale to be Bruce.”
“No,” Louis answered. “You don’t know who I am?”
Zayn looked him up and down and sat down in a chair facing him, “Well, no, I don’t.”
“Try Louis Tomlinson,” Louis snapped.
Zayn let out a loud laugh, “Well I’ll be damned. What took you so long, Tomlinson?”
“You took him from me,” Louis’ voice quivered in anger.
“He wanted to go,” Zayn said simply with a shrug. “He had enough. Who can blame him, really. He needed some real men.”
“You’re going to die, don’t you know that?” Louis hissed.
Zayn looked up at him, “Oh? Why? Because I proved to be a better lover?”
Louis pulled out the gun, “I know what you did, Malik. You’re sicker than the rest of us.”
Zayn stood up instantly and his eyes grew wide and he held up his hands, “Why?”
“You took advantage of me. You took advantage of Harry,” Louis said. “You took him away from me because you scared me. You played games with me. You took advantage of a little boy and tried to make him some sort of…sex slave? He was safe in my hands.”
“Like what you did was so much better,” Zayn sneered.
Louis pressed the trigger. A bullet was lodged into Zayn’s chest. Louis fired again, impaling random parts of Zayn’s body. Zayn staggered past him and Louis followed. He shot him once more in the back, causing Zayn to fall to the ground. Zayn crawled to a vacant bed by the window. He bloodied the white sheets. His entire face covered in blood and Louis was bewildered that he managed to even still be alive. It felt good to watch him suffer. It felt good to make him feel pain. He wanted him to die, he wanted him to see just how it felt to have to lose something special to you.
“Get out of here,” Zayn shouted at him. “Get out of here!”
Louis shot him in the chest again. And this time, Zayn fell back and his chest stopped moving. He had succeeded. Louis didn’t care about the blood on his face or the gun he was still carrying. He got back into his car and drove away. He had made up for it, he thought. Zayn was sicker than anyone he’d ever met, even himself. And he swerved all over the road, too careless to think about the possibility of getting pulled over by the police. Careless to think about the possibility of being charged with the murder of Zayn Malik.
Harry died Christmas Day in an automobile wreck on the way to the hospital with his wife to give birth to their child.
Louis died of a heart attack in jail just a short week later.