joke for the weekend

[miniboy]

An English ventriloquist visiting Australia walks into a small village and sees a local sitting on his porch patting his dog.

He figures he'll have some fun, so he says to the Aussie "Can I talk to your dog?"
Villager: "The dog doesn't talk, ya dumb galoot!"
Ventriloquist: "Hello dog, how's it going mate?
Dog: "Fair dinkum"
Villager: (Look of extreme shock)

Ventriloquist: "Is this villager your owner?" (Pointing at the villager)
Dog: "Yep"
Ventriloquist: "How does he treat you?"
Dog: "Real good. He walks me twice a day; feeds me great tucker and takes me to the billabong once a week to play"
Villager: (Look of disbelief)

Ventriloquist: "Mind if I talk to your horse?"
Villager: "Uh, the horse don't talk either. I think"
Ventriloquist: "Hey horse, how's it going?"
Horse: "Bonser!"
Villager: (Absolutely dumbfounded)
Ventriloquist: "Is this your owner?" (Pointing to the villager)
Horse: "Yep"
Ventriloquist: "How does he treat you?"
Horse: "A better man never stood in two shoes. He rides me regularly, brushes me down often and keeps me in the barn to protect me from the
elements"
Villager: (Total look of amazement)

Ventriloquist: "Mind if I talk to your sheep?"
Villager: (In a panic) "The sheep's a f*ckin' liar"