Lies, dammed lies, and the things we tell our parents.
Well, today I had an interview with centrelink vis Newstart allowance. Need to get a separation certificate from the company I used to work for, which no longer exists!
All the fun of the fucking fairground, really.
It is important to note that despite the subject, I have not lied to my parents. Today. Much. With malice aforethought.
My mastery of the culinary arts increases every day. Today, I prepared Fishcakes! From the finest tinned salmon and mashed potatoes, to a crunchy, wholesome treat, in less time than it takes to write a telephone book out by hand.
Space mutant invasion repelled through power of love. Trying to get J-pop saviour of humanity replaced with Norah Jones, or maybe the chick from The Waifs. Is some concern, however, that blues lacks vital poor dubbing to shatter alien morale. Research required. If Science demands that I abduct Norah Jones and make her sing for me, then so be it. Hurrah for skimpy hospital gowns.
And because I know you're all gagging for it, l'journal du 7th Faulcone, part troix
Realm Year 760, 4 of Resplendent Earth
Subject: Serendipity
Har-di-fucking-har!
Stupid Wyld Hunt has been conned by fat dragon Meru into investigating same problem I was before they caught me (See entry for 25 Ascending Earth) They can give excuses like "Disruptions to localized river traffic affects the Satrapy of Piers and, by extension, the Realm" all they like, but I can smell the old worm's opium on their clothes.
Still, this means more walking with heavy chains on, more low-grade physical abuse from withered old psycho hag Green Poison, and more lectures from Ming on the disgusting state of the world, that coarse Terrestrials should dare chain and plan to enslave their rightful masters. Given half a chance I would have them subjected to the Void-Space Enhancer, and see how cocky they are when I've extracted their worthless souls to use as...
Ahem. Excuse me while I discipline my left hand.
Edit: Have been attacked by small army of hungry ghosts. Forced to use my key to break out and save Morgan. Green Poison not eaten, v. disappointed. Suspect the ghosts have something to do with the drop in river level.
Music: Jonny Cash "I fought the Law"
Mood: Lighter, by about 50lb of chains.
All the fun of the fucking fairground, really.
It is important to note that despite the subject, I have not lied to my parents. Today. Much. With malice aforethought.
My mastery of the culinary arts increases every day. Today, I prepared Fishcakes! From the finest tinned salmon and mashed potatoes, to a crunchy, wholesome treat, in less time than it takes to write a telephone book out by hand.
Space mutant invasion repelled through power of love. Trying to get J-pop saviour of humanity replaced with Norah Jones, or maybe the chick from The Waifs. Is some concern, however, that blues lacks vital poor dubbing to shatter alien morale. Research required. If Science demands that I abduct Norah Jones and make her sing for me, then so be it. Hurrah for skimpy hospital gowns.
And because I know you're all gagging for it, l'journal du 7th Faulcone, part troix
Realm Year 760, 4 of Resplendent Earth
Subject: Serendipity
Har-di-fucking-har!
Stupid Wyld Hunt has been conned by fat dragon Meru into investigating same problem I was before they caught me (See entry for 25 Ascending Earth) They can give excuses like "Disruptions to localized river traffic affects the Satrapy of Piers and, by extension, the Realm" all they like, but I can smell the old worm's opium on their clothes.
Still, this means more walking with heavy chains on, more low-grade physical abuse from withered old psycho hag Green Poison, and more lectures from Ming on the disgusting state of the world, that coarse Terrestrials should dare chain and plan to enslave their rightful masters. Given half a chance I would have them subjected to the Void-Space Enhancer, and see how cocky they are when I've extracted their worthless souls to use as...
Ahem. Excuse me while I discipline my left hand.
Edit: Have been attacked by small army of hungry ghosts. Forced to use my key to break out and save Morgan. Green Poison not eaten, v. disappointed. Suspect the ghosts have something to do with the drop in river level.
Music: Jonny Cash "I fought the Law"
Mood: Lighter, by about 50lb of chains.