{one} Sin S(e)oul

[minewsadvocate]

title: Sin S(e)oul
word count: 3043w
pairing: Onho, Jongkey
genre: crime, drama, action, romance
overall rating: NC-17
warning: Presence of violence, (consensual and not) sex, prostitution, gambling and mafia activities in general
summary: What happens when you become part of a powerful organization that could make you feel alive as much as dead? And

Comments

[hitoshisakurai]

And I'm late with this comment -.-
*excited to see you got so many comments <33333*
Okay, so now just lemme bask in the perfection of this chappie.
I love Jonghyun's and Kyuhyun's friendship. Their dialogue is so natural, unforced and full of understanding and some teasing and it's just awesome. I've never seen Kyuhyun as Jjong's friend, so it's a very refreshing and original concept.
But. Jongho friendship is beyond precious I LOVE HOW YOU DESCRIBE PEOPLE'S INTERACTIONS, OKAY? They all come out so realistic and they have such a great flow. I don't know how to say it, but it's more to this than just a, you know, simple description of one's actions. It's as if I were watching a movie actually.
I love the plot I freaking love it and it's just amazing. Minho's got some serious problem now... dang. GOSH IT'S SO EXCITING I CAN'T EVEN
And, wah, Key and Minho being in such a not-good relationship is something I rarely get to experience in the world of fiction... it's quite suprising and really nice. I love it how Minho just leaves with a neat excuse (I LOVE YOUR DIALOGUES).
And, JongKey. Oh my, that wasn't a kiss, wasn't a proclamation of love or anything like that, but it felt like more than all those things. This scene was so precious and beautiful and extremely intimate... I love it to pieces. Oh my.
And, ngl, when you wrote that Key refused Jonghyun as to walk him home, I was like 'OH MY GOD NO SOMETHING'S GOING TO HAPPEN TO HIM' but, fortunately, it's just Minho... again, I FREAKING LOVED THE DIALOGUE. LIKE, GIRL, I COULD QUOTE ALL OF YOUR DIALOGUES. BELIEVE ME. THEY'RE SIMPLY AWESOME.
And, GOSH, I JUST CAN'T WAIT FOR THE NEXT CHAPTER
And I won't complain about the slow pace of the fic because, gosh, IT'S WONDERFUL. As long as you don't drop it somewhere halfway (DON'T, I BEG YOU. JUST, DON'T), I'll be absolutely okay with it!! It's amazing when we get to read some slowly but well developed plot to read...
And, you're so welcome, dear, you're so welcome ;~~~~~; and, btw., by 'feedback' you meant a comment or what? :DD /feels dumb OTL
And it's okay, but I wouldn't object for a spot in the next chappie :DDD HWAITING!! CAN'T WAIT, REALLY. UNF.

[minewsadvocate]

Aww don't worry about it ;__; I read on your journal that you were sick :( I hope you feel better now^^

I don't know how to describe the perfection of your comment ;__;

You know… I've always sucked at dialogues. I don't know if you noticed, but there is not much dialogue xD I prefer describing things ;__; because I thought my dialogue was always so lame :/
After reading your comment… I think you made me the happiest first-time writer ever *__*
I love you for loving my dialogue <3

I know Jonghyun and Kyuhyun's friendship is quite unusual (actually, I didn't know xD cause I don't read many fics) It's just that I see Kyuhyun's dorky personality perfect for Jonghyun's one haha

Recently Minho and Kibum said they used to not be in a really good relationship when they debuted… And to be quite honest I've always seen them very different from each other. I'm extremely happy that now they have got over their awkwardness and they are more close to each other…
in this fic though… they can't stand each other xD but it's not that they hate each other, it's just that they like to fight^^

To me… Jonghyun and Minho have the best friendship ever. (which is not love, I don't ship Jongho and never will lol) I'm glad you felt it in this chapter :)

It's funny, you said that the way I write actions is like a movie. That's the exactly what I think too. I guess I like to go deep with details, just like movies?

I think I need to stop here xD Because if I talk about the Jongkey scene I'd be able to write a novel about it lol

Thank you my dear, your comment was perfect, amazing and you are awesome.

Here sexy Jinki for ya~

[hitoshisakurai]

More than sick, I was fed up with some things, but, yupp, I'm alright now ;3

You know... we're kinda the opposite xD Like, I've always been way more confident about writing dialogues than describing, so.. x"D but, girl, they are really great. Now that you mentioned it, yup, there's not so many dialogues in it, but when they appear they're there for something, they're meaningful and really well-though and well-written and I really love them <3

Hahaha, there was a variety show in which Key said that Minho's a close friend of his *my JongKey heart kinda broke back then XDDDD*. But yeah, they're just so different and I love the way their relationship works in this fic, it's very refreshing ^w^

Me neither, I don't ship Jongho x"D And yupp, bff!Jongho is precious... bff!Jongyu too, but bff!Jongho is the best of a kind.

Yupp, and I really admire you for that, I wish I could make descriptions like you ;~~~;

OHMYGODSEXYJINKIWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH <3333

Can't wait for the next part!!!!!!>////////