unc: gargoyles for beating duke.
unc: gargoyles for beating duke.
Originally uploaded by minervacat. Dean Smith made basketball a religion in our family, rivaled only by Presbyterianism, barbeque, and the Democratic Party. For many years, our dream scenario had gone something like this: Dean beats archrival Duke and its coach, the detested Mike Krzyzewski, for the national championship in April, then runs for the Senate (for which he had long been rumored a candidate) and whips the antediluvian Jesse Helms in November! Then we all eat barbeque from Allen & Sons, on Highway 86, to celebrate. Then we go to church to thank God for sending us this wry Kansan to make our state safe for hoops and liberals. Sadly, this never happened. -- Will Blythe, from To Hate Like This Is To Be Happy Forever
internets, today is the third holiest of my personal high holy days1: today is carolina at duke, carolina at cameron indoor, the hands-down greatest rivalry in college sports. (it's the greatest rivalry because eight miles. michigan/ohio state goes back further, and there are some others that contend, but -- and god help me that i'm admitting this -- coach k explained it best when he said, "we go to the same dry cleaners." the summation of this rivalry: dry cleaners. it's one of the only subjects in the whole world on which i will not hear any other opinions2, no matter how well-reasoned -- well, i'll hear the opinions, but while you're talking, in my head i'll be singing the carolina fight song and thinking about reyshawn terry's arms. i won't be listening, because i don't need to: this is the best. rivalry. ever.)
campus is sizzling with excitement. i keep twitching, and reloading google reader in hopes that there will be more coverage of the game spoon-fed to me. i have booze, i am washing the loss off the lucky sweatshirt, and now we sit, and wait, and tip off is at 9 pm on espn, unless you're in charlotte in which case tip off is at 9 pm on your local cbs station. no, i have no idea why. at least you won't have to listen to dick vitale.
rageprufrock wrote me a story today -- it's my birthday story3, and it's about sam seaborn at duke law school, and josh lyman, and the way that it's impossible to understand what this game means if you haven't been a part of it. it's cameron, and it made me clap my hands with glee in about 14 different spots, because a) josh, sam, carolina basketball! and b) it's a delightfully sly little manifesto about what people will do for this rivalry.
if you've never lived this rivalry, bled sky blue or royal blue, flung something at your television (or, worse, the television at the bar where you're no longer welcome, after flinging something at their television) in a fit of disgust or joy, there's nothing i can say that will explain it to you. i'd recommend will blythe's delightfully bitter, hysterically funny, absolutely true book to hate like this is to be happy forever, but i'm not sure that anyone who isn't a carolina fan would make it past the first ten pages before passing out from boredom. (i also recommend blythe's cynical, doom-saying post on deadspin.)
understanding doesn't really matter today, though. it's carolina at duke day. it's a holy day, down here on tobacco road. the sky is clear, and the color of our uniforms. go heels -- duck fuke.
1: the two high holy days in my pantheon that trump carolina at duke are #2, pitchers and catchers reporting to spring training, and #1, duke at carolina, which is pretty much the entire reason i came to carolina for graduate school. one of the best library schools in the country? eh, whatever. free tickets to duke at home? sign me up, baby.
2: i will defer to carolina/state as another great rivalry on tobacco road, but only if sidney lowe keeps them competitive. ain't been much of one, before this year, lately.
3: yes, my birthday is in march; no, you didn't miss a whole month. back in december, pru asked if she could use my birthday story as part of 14 valentines, and as this meant that i could have it five weeks early, i very magnanimously said of course.