bad joke of the day
*stands and raises her hand* "My name is Mindy and my dog is addicted to water and snow." My back and hip were really bothering me tonight (from playing outside today with Gibbs in the cold today) so i decided to pour a super hot bath. Thinking that i had closed the door tightly, i went to the other bathroom to get a towel. When i came back, there was Gibbs, happily doggy paddling around the tub, covered in bubbles. The dog needs help! Anyway, in totally other, useless news...i made dinner tonight and broke three eggs for my eggs and toast and 2 of said eggs, had double yolks! Okay, i thought that it was pretty cool. My interview is on Wednesday but if the weather is bad (like they are calling for it to be) I am not going. It's not worth it. Today is December 7 and here is today's joke:
Twas the day after Christmas and all
through the house
Children sat slack-jawed, bored on the couch.
Wrappings and toys littered the floor,
An incredible mess that I did abhor.
With Mom in her robe and I in my jeans,
We waded in to get the place clean.
When suddenly the doorbell started to clatter,
I sprang to the Security-View to check out the matter.
The new-fallen snow, now blackened with soot,
Was trampled and icy and treacherous to foot.
But suddenly in view, did I gasp and pant,
An unhappy bill collector and eight tiny accountants.
The door flew open and in they came,
Stern-looking men with bills in my name.
On Discover, on Visa, on American Express,
On Mastercard too, I sadly confess,
To the top of my limits, to the top of my worth,
Then over the top I had charged, in a frenzy of mirth.
The black-suited men, so somber, so strict,
I wondered why me that they had first picked.
They stared at me with a look I couldn't miss,
That said "Buddy, what are your plans for paying for this?"
I shrugged my shoulders, but then I grew bolder,
Went to the cabinet and pulled out a folder.
"As you can see," I said with a smile,
"It's bankruptcy that I'll have to file."
And with a swoop of my arm, my middle digit extended
I threw the bills in the fire: the matter had ended.
The scent of burnt ash came to my nose,
As up the chimney my credit-worthiness rose.
Without another word they turned and walked out,
Got into their limos, but one gave a shout:
"You may think that's the answer to all of your fears,
But it's nothing you'll charge for at least seven years!
see you tomorrow!
Twas the day after Christmas and all
through the house
Children sat slack-jawed, bored on the couch.
Wrappings and toys littered the floor,
An incredible mess that I did abhor.
With Mom in her robe and I in my jeans,
We waded in to get the place clean.
When suddenly the doorbell started to clatter,
I sprang to the Security-View to check out the matter.
The new-fallen snow, now blackened with soot,
Was trampled and icy and treacherous to foot.
But suddenly in view, did I gasp and pant,
An unhappy bill collector and eight tiny accountants.
The door flew open and in they came,
Stern-looking men with bills in my name.
On Discover, on Visa, on American Express,
On Mastercard too, I sadly confess,
To the top of my limits, to the top of my worth,
Then over the top I had charged, in a frenzy of mirth.
The black-suited men, so somber, so strict,
I wondered why me that they had first picked.
They stared at me with a look I couldn't miss,
That said "Buddy, what are your plans for paying for this?"
I shrugged my shoulders, but then I grew bolder,
Went to the cabinet and pulled out a folder.
"As you can see," I said with a smile,
"It's bankruptcy that I'll have to file."
And with a swoop of my arm, my middle digit extended
I threw the bills in the fire: the matter had ended.
The scent of burnt ash came to my nose,
As up the chimney my credit-worthiness rose.
Without another word they turned and walked out,
Got into their limos, but one gave a shout:
"You may think that's the answer to all of your fears,
But it's nothing you'll charge for at least seven years!
see you tomorrow!