And you're the only one, that's understood.
Ah to live without illness, that would be the dream I hold in highest regards.
What am I supposed to be doing?
1. Studying for a marketing exam.
2. Reading Silas Lapham.
3. Writing my prospectus.
4. Finishing an assignment for marketing.
5. Reading for Malone (I think I saw some mansard roofs).
What am I actually doing?
1. Picking my fingernail beds.
2. Watching American Idol.
3. Reading up on the Cubs.
4. Worshiping from afar (oh TR you and I are meant to be, can't you see?)
5. Looking to blow some money.
6. Trying not to wheeze.
I love Chicago. I have not been, yet it has already taken my breath away. By the way. I wrote an article about Providence recently for POST. Not the best thing I've ever written but good; oh I should just repeat the mantra "some things just are." EJG you confuse me so.
I'm enamoured with many things recently. One is not my health, another is not the gym. To look foward to: Baseball season, the spring, my twenty first birthday, disney world, hong kong, tokyo, commencement, the summer summer summer. Flip flops, skirts, looking cute for a reason, carousels, parks, two nin concerts, NEXT YEAR'S SUITE!!, brown in the summer, applying to graduate school, sleeping in two days a week.
I'm listening to perfect drug. It makes me think of the part in woody allen's manhattan when he asks what makes life worth living. its a confusing thing to ponder, if I thought of today in retrospect, could i pick something out that made it worth living. I awoke feeling that everyday pain in my chest, stumbled to the rat lab, went to english, got a not so hot grade back on a paper I wrote when I was sick, went to the doctor, got frustrated, took a nap, awoke to ice cream and bunny box. i can tell you nothing made today particularly important, if not more annoying in the scope of things.
this is the only time i really feel alive. well trent, if you truly only feel alive while fucking, all the more reason you should visit brown, there will be plenty of that. well, i mean, you should visit in a week or so when i'm not sick. "swim in it until i drown my moral standing is lying down, nothing quite like the feel of something new." I'd have to agree with that, there's nothing better than experiencing something different, living something new. i know he's talking about losing his virginity, but i'm trying to break away from talking about sex with frequency as all of my friends insist that i do.
Maybe i should have giving up talking about sex for lent, but something about that spells sacralige, and that's probably not spelled correctly but if people have gotten this far in my lj, than you should really not give a damn. I don't give a damn about spelling any more than I give a damn about liberal arguments. i think the longer i stay at brown the more conservative i get, and its not like i have conservative tendencies, i just find some of the rhetoric they tout to be absolutely teeth grinding. it makes me want to roll my eyes and wave an american flag. i'm by no means a flag waver.
I've got to give up talking politics, I really suck at it. What I am good at, making an argument where one doesn't exist. Taking the opposite sides of realistic arguments is also a speciality.
I'm writing on a little piece of paper, I'm hoping someday you might find. I'll hide it behind something, they won't look behind. I AM STILL INSIDE. A LITTLE BIT COMES BLEEDING THROUGH. I WISH THIS COULD HAVE BEEN ANY OTHER WAY, BUT I JUST DON'T KNOW, I DON'T KNOW WHAT ELSE I CAN DO.
I love that song. I feel I should quote it everytime it comes on. A WITHA TEETHA. Hahaha. I laugh at myself. This entry is getting boring, but I am jittery from my inhaler and cannot concentrate. I hate marketing. what bull shit. spend your moneys elsewhere. i don't really like any classes this semester, maybe pop culture abroad, but i feel i do not fit in in this amciv environment all the time. i wonder if i should just do history, it is what i do, but it is more what i make it. life is so confusing. maybe i should just fess up to smulyan. kind of freaks me out to think of.
What am I supposed to be doing?
1. Studying for a marketing exam.
2. Reading Silas Lapham.
3. Writing my prospectus.
4. Finishing an assignment for marketing.
5. Reading for Malone (I think I saw some mansard roofs).
What am I actually doing?
1. Picking my fingernail beds.
2. Watching American Idol.
3. Reading up on the Cubs.
4. Worshiping from afar (oh TR you and I are meant to be, can't you see?)
5. Looking to blow some money.
6. Trying not to wheeze.
I love Chicago. I have not been, yet it has already taken my breath away. By the way. I wrote an article about Providence recently for POST. Not the best thing I've ever written but good; oh I should just repeat the mantra "some things just are." EJG you confuse me so.
I'm enamoured with many things recently. One is not my health, another is not the gym. To look foward to: Baseball season, the spring, my twenty first birthday, disney world, hong kong, tokyo, commencement, the summer summer summer. Flip flops, skirts, looking cute for a reason, carousels, parks, two nin concerts, NEXT YEAR'S SUITE!!, brown in the summer, applying to graduate school, sleeping in two days a week.
I'm listening to perfect drug. It makes me think of the part in woody allen's manhattan when he asks what makes life worth living. its a confusing thing to ponder, if I thought of today in retrospect, could i pick something out that made it worth living. I awoke feeling that everyday pain in my chest, stumbled to the rat lab, went to english, got a not so hot grade back on a paper I wrote when I was sick, went to the doctor, got frustrated, took a nap, awoke to ice cream and bunny box. i can tell you nothing made today particularly important, if not more annoying in the scope of things.
this is the only time i really feel alive. well trent, if you truly only feel alive while fucking, all the more reason you should visit brown, there will be plenty of that. well, i mean, you should visit in a week or so when i'm not sick. "swim in it until i drown my moral standing is lying down, nothing quite like the feel of something new." I'd have to agree with that, there's nothing better than experiencing something different, living something new. i know he's talking about losing his virginity, but i'm trying to break away from talking about sex with frequency as all of my friends insist that i do.
Maybe i should have giving up talking about sex for lent, but something about that spells sacralige, and that's probably not spelled correctly but if people have gotten this far in my lj, than you should really not give a damn. I don't give a damn about spelling any more than I give a damn about liberal arguments. i think the longer i stay at brown the more conservative i get, and its not like i have conservative tendencies, i just find some of the rhetoric they tout to be absolutely teeth grinding. it makes me want to roll my eyes and wave an american flag. i'm by no means a flag waver.
I've got to give up talking politics, I really suck at it. What I am good at, making an argument where one doesn't exist. Taking the opposite sides of realistic arguments is also a speciality.
I'm writing on a little piece of paper, I'm hoping someday you might find. I'll hide it behind something, they won't look behind. I AM STILL INSIDE. A LITTLE BIT COMES BLEEDING THROUGH. I WISH THIS COULD HAVE BEEN ANY OTHER WAY, BUT I JUST DON'T KNOW, I DON'T KNOW WHAT ELSE I CAN DO.
I love that song. I feel I should quote it everytime it comes on. A WITHA TEETHA. Hahaha. I laugh at myself. This entry is getting boring, but I am jittery from my inhaler and cannot concentrate. I hate marketing. what bull shit. spend your moneys elsewhere. i don't really like any classes this semester, maybe pop culture abroad, but i feel i do not fit in in this amciv environment all the time. i wonder if i should just do history, it is what i do, but it is more what i make it. life is so confusing. maybe i should just fess up to smulyan. kind of freaks me out to think of.