happy face
sup? life is alright here. for all of you not keeping in regular contact with me, i am now a real estate appraiser. i go around central florida, visit people's homes, go back to the office and then carefully craft reports informing them of how much it's worth. boo-yah. it's kind of fun going into people's houses, especially if they're excited about it and really want to show it off but i've had more than a few awkward moments. to illustrate, the very second house i ever looked at happened to be inhabited by three men. at least one of them was gay, which normally wouldn't matter but when you have to take pictures of the interior and there's homosexual erotica hanging on all of the walls and vases full of condoms everywhere, it becomes a little uncomfortable. dad was like, 'um, i think that's enough pictures emily, how about you get some shots of the backyard and then go wait in the car?' on the other hand, that day we also got to see big tony's house. big tony is a friend of my dad's and a millionaire and italian. naturally we think he must be involved with organized crime. his home had been completely remodeled with the motherland in mind PLUS he was smoking a cigar. as soon as i got home that night i crossed italy off my places to go list, seeing as i'd now practically been there.
anyways, tonight i finally watched some tv. since i've been home i think i've only seen 2 pimp my rides and 1 episode of the cosby show. but that isn't to say i don't spend time in front of the television. i've been on a movie binge since day one of the homecoming. i am a proud member of the 'blockbuster-version-of-netflix' online rental service. IT HAS CHANGED MY LIFE. since about the age of 12, i have been spreading the word that blockbuster is the devil. at 14 i became particularly irate when they overtook my beloved 16,000 movies, jacked the rental prices up $1.50 and shut down the free popcorn machine. at 16 they became my foremost enemy when they wouldn't let me rent a movie because i didn't have a credit card, car, or utility bill. i had to go home that night sans rush hour. sniff.
but somehow i signed up and i gotta say that since subscribing to their online program, i have changed. my mind has been opened and i no longer discriminate against movies just because of an unenticing trailor or a less than momentous past performance by one of the actors. for example: if my sister says, 'hey em, lets rent phonebooth.' the pre-blockbuster emily would have said 'hell no lily, there's no way i would EVER see a colin ferrel movie or a katie holmes movie. and the two of them combined in one film just gives me the willies. now go away and don't talk to me for at least two days.' but post-blockbuster i would and did say 'alright, i'll queue it when i get a chance.' once i said no to movies such as the bourne identity and the last samurai, but now i see that i was wrong and i'm not afraid to admit that.
which reminds me, batman begins was awesome. on top of it being a great movie, we all know i'm in love with liam. plus christian bale has been the man since i first saw him in treasure island, and cillian murphy is exactly what i meant when i said irish boys with blue eyes are the way to go. for all these reasons i tried to persuade myself that katie holmes wouldn't completely ruin the movie. she was doing a great job convincing me that she was in fact bruce waynes childhood friend until the very end when i guess the role became too much for her to handle and she reverted to joey potter, the least favorite and most annoying of dawson's crew. for real, did anyone understand her convoluted confessional? 'oh bruce, your not the man who left me, you're someone else with a mask, but not the bat mask... another mask, and someday maybe he will come back...but until then i will send you and the audience mixed signals.' but to be fair, i'm not even sure it was her fault, what were these screenwriters thinking anyways? whatever it was, it was definitely lost in her translation.
um...i think i got off track. the whole point was that i watched some tv tonight. and on the tv was tim burton. it went something like this: 'oh me oh my, i am god's gift to cinema. in my new masterpiece, charlie and the chocolate factory, i went exactly by the book unlike that god awful atrocity made back in the 70s. oh, i just positively cringe to even speak of it. i'm sure roald dahl would just have LOVED how i stuck with his book to a T. except for where i changed this. and that. and added this...and, well i know he was thinking it anyways.'
GAG ME. as far as i was concerned the biggest problem with the original movie was the oompa loompas (not that i didn't love them). the book, as we all know, depicts oompa loompas as little men AND WOMEN from a jungle (in loompaland), wearing animal fur and having unwieldly facial hair. tarzanesque miniatures if you will. not only does mr. burton leave out oompa loompa facial hair, but he only casts ONE PERSON to play all the oompa loompas. talk about stereotyping a fictitious race. that is SO not PC. oh roald, nobody understands you as i understand you. i've had your back since the third grade. but as i said before, i am now open minded and will attend a viewing of this movie with my family...even if THE oompa loompa is wearing a patent leather body suit.
as for now it is late and i have written entirely too much seeing as i didn't really say anything. Goodnight.
anyways, tonight i finally watched some tv. since i've been home i think i've only seen 2 pimp my rides and 1 episode of the cosby show. but that isn't to say i don't spend time in front of the television. i've been on a movie binge since day one of the homecoming. i am a proud member of the 'blockbuster-version-of-netflix' online rental service. IT HAS CHANGED MY LIFE. since about the age of 12, i have been spreading the word that blockbuster is the devil. at 14 i became particularly irate when they overtook my beloved 16,000 movies, jacked the rental prices up $1.50 and shut down the free popcorn machine. at 16 they became my foremost enemy when they wouldn't let me rent a movie because i didn't have a credit card, car, or utility bill. i had to go home that night sans rush hour. sniff.
but somehow i signed up and i gotta say that since subscribing to their online program, i have changed. my mind has been opened and i no longer discriminate against movies just because of an unenticing trailor or a less than momentous past performance by one of the actors. for example: if my sister says, 'hey em, lets rent phonebooth.' the pre-blockbuster emily would have said 'hell no lily, there's no way i would EVER see a colin ferrel movie or a katie holmes movie. and the two of them combined in one film just gives me the willies. now go away and don't talk to me for at least two days.' but post-blockbuster i would and did say 'alright, i'll queue it when i get a chance.' once i said no to movies such as the bourne identity and the last samurai, but now i see that i was wrong and i'm not afraid to admit that.
which reminds me, batman begins was awesome. on top of it being a great movie, we all know i'm in love with liam. plus christian bale has been the man since i first saw him in treasure island, and cillian murphy is exactly what i meant when i said irish boys with blue eyes are the way to go. for all these reasons i tried to persuade myself that katie holmes wouldn't completely ruin the movie. she was doing a great job convincing me that she was in fact bruce waynes childhood friend until the very end when i guess the role became too much for her to handle and she reverted to joey potter, the least favorite and most annoying of dawson's crew. for real, did anyone understand her convoluted confessional? 'oh bruce, your not the man who left me, you're someone else with a mask, but not the bat mask... another mask, and someday maybe he will come back...but until then i will send you and the audience mixed signals.' but to be fair, i'm not even sure it was her fault, what were these screenwriters thinking anyways? whatever it was, it was definitely lost in her translation.
um...i think i got off track. the whole point was that i watched some tv tonight. and on the tv was tim burton. it went something like this: 'oh me oh my, i am god's gift to cinema. in my new masterpiece, charlie and the chocolate factory, i went exactly by the book unlike that god awful atrocity made back in the 70s. oh, i just positively cringe to even speak of it. i'm sure roald dahl would just have LOVED how i stuck with his book to a T. except for where i changed this. and that. and added this...and, well i know he was thinking it anyways.'
GAG ME. as far as i was concerned the biggest problem with the original movie was the oompa loompas (not that i didn't love them). the book, as we all know, depicts oompa loompas as little men AND WOMEN from a jungle (in loompaland), wearing animal fur and having unwieldly facial hair. tarzanesque miniatures if you will. not only does mr. burton leave out oompa loompa facial hair, but he only casts ONE PERSON to play all the oompa loompas. talk about stereotyping a fictitious race. that is SO not PC. oh roald, nobody understands you as i understand you. i've had your back since the third grade. but as i said before, i am now open minded and will attend a viewing of this movie with my family...even if THE oompa loompa is wearing a patent leather body suit.
as for now it is late and i have written entirely too much seeing as i didn't really say anything. Goodnight.