Sunshine Her Eyelids
I should have died on Thursday of last week, but I didn't.
Steve and I had just finished a busy day of school on that Thursday afternoon and were talking in the parking lot with our other pal Jon. Jon left for work shortly after. If memory serves me correctly, then I had to urinate intensely, so I was eager to return home. I notified Steve of this valuable information. He agreed, and then we both hopped into our vehicles. My sister was waiting in the passenger seat for me.
I left the parking lot and drove down the stretch of road that connects to the highway (29). There I met a stoplight, already red from exhaustion. My only instinct at that point was to stop, for running a red light is a serious crime and might get somebody hurt. Steve pulled up right behind me in his deliciously rusted truck. I spotted him in my rear view window, he waved, and then I looked back at the stoplight. It had already turned green, and it had been green for almost two seconds. When my eyes met with the soft, secondary color, then something triggered in my brain, allowing me to press softly on the acceleration with my right foot.
I had not realized an oncoming truck was neither decreasing nor increasing in speed, so I assumed it was keeping an ongoing pace. This was sad news for me since I was directly in its path. The vehicle came into contact with mine at a perpendicular (about 90 degrees, fool) angle traveling about 55 MPH and puncturing my driver's side door.
Then I woke up a few minutes later.
I don't really remember anything until a few hours after being awake when I was in the car driving to the hospital. Those silly fags (the EMS) didn't question me properly, so I wasn't able to receive a ride in the medically equipped ambulance. They never knew I was knocked unconscious.
Later that night I had my shoulder X-rayed. I also got a CAT scan (computed axial tomography, for those of you who don't know) of my brain.
No broken bones.
No permanent brain damage.
No insurance information from the bitch (Ginny Morris's mother) that hit me. Damn!
The whore left without even offering her information to us. The silly slut. I should sue her ass. I haven't been able to sleep on my left side for the past three nights. My shoulder hurts like a bitch.
Cool conversations I had while suffering from temporary brain damage (5 - 60 minutes after the collision):
#1)
Me: "Damn, am I dreaming?"
Steve: "No, Spencer, you just had a car wreck."
Me: "Heh, I know."
#2)
Me: "Shit, we better go get my backpack from out of the car."
Steve: "You already got your bags."
Me: "Oh yeah."
#3)
Me: "Aw, man! I just got a full tank of gas the other day!"
Mom: "I know, Spencer. You already told me."
Me: "Yeah, I know."
#4)
Ms. Young: "Spencer, was that you that got in the car wreck?"
Me: "Maybe..."
Ms. Young: "..."
Me: "Okay, yeah."
I only remember the fourth conversation but vaguely. The first two Steve told me about. The #2 conversation was repeated more than once in reality. The third one doesn't count because I sorta made it up. It actually happened, but I don't remember the exact words. I know it involved "just got a full tank of gas" and possibly "I", but that's all.
Now I'm pondering only one thing. Why didn't I die? Can I really defy physics? If so, what else can I defy?
My advice for everyone:
Avoid running red lights. It can kill. In this case, it just hurts a lot.
My advice for Ginny Morris's mom:
Avoid using sunlight as an excuse for temporary blindness when not watching the fuck out for stoplights. Whore.
My advice for the sun:
Try actually being in the driver's eyes next time, you faggot. Just kidding. I love you.
Steve and I had just finished a busy day of school on that Thursday afternoon and were talking in the parking lot with our other pal Jon. Jon left for work shortly after. If memory serves me correctly, then I had to urinate intensely, so I was eager to return home. I notified Steve of this valuable information. He agreed, and then we both hopped into our vehicles. My sister was waiting in the passenger seat for me.
I left the parking lot and drove down the stretch of road that connects to the highway (29). There I met a stoplight, already red from exhaustion. My only instinct at that point was to stop, for running a red light is a serious crime and might get somebody hurt. Steve pulled up right behind me in his deliciously rusted truck. I spotted him in my rear view window, he waved, and then I looked back at the stoplight. It had already turned green, and it had been green for almost two seconds. When my eyes met with the soft, secondary color, then something triggered in my brain, allowing me to press softly on the acceleration with my right foot.
I had not realized an oncoming truck was neither decreasing nor increasing in speed, so I assumed it was keeping an ongoing pace. This was sad news for me since I was directly in its path. The vehicle came into contact with mine at a perpendicular (about 90 degrees, fool) angle traveling about 55 MPH and puncturing my driver's side door.
Then I woke up a few minutes later.
I don't really remember anything until a few hours after being awake when I was in the car driving to the hospital. Those silly fags (the EMS) didn't question me properly, so I wasn't able to receive a ride in the medically equipped ambulance. They never knew I was knocked unconscious.
Later that night I had my shoulder X-rayed. I also got a CAT scan (computed axial tomography, for those of you who don't know) of my brain.
No broken bones.
No permanent brain damage.
No insurance information from the bitch (Ginny Morris's mother) that hit me. Damn!
The whore left without even offering her information to us. The silly slut. I should sue her ass. I haven't been able to sleep on my left side for the past three nights. My shoulder hurts like a bitch.
Cool conversations I had while suffering from temporary brain damage (5 - 60 minutes after the collision):
#1)
Me: "Damn, am I dreaming?"
Steve: "No, Spencer, you just had a car wreck."
Me: "Heh, I know."
#2)
Me: "Shit, we better go get my backpack from out of the car."
Steve: "You already got your bags."
Me: "Oh yeah."
#3)
Me: "Aw, man! I just got a full tank of gas the other day!"
Mom: "I know, Spencer. You already told me."
Me: "Yeah, I know."
#4)
Ms. Young: "Spencer, was that you that got in the car wreck?"
Me: "Maybe..."
Ms. Young: "..."
Me: "Okay, yeah."
I only remember the fourth conversation but vaguely. The first two Steve told me about. The #2 conversation was repeated more than once in reality. The third one doesn't count because I sorta made it up. It actually happened, but I don't remember the exact words. I know it involved "just got a full tank of gas" and possibly "I", but that's all.
Now I'm pondering only one thing. Why didn't I die? Can I really defy physics? If so, what else can I defy?
My advice for everyone:
Avoid running red lights. It can kill. In this case, it just hurts a lot.
My advice for Ginny Morris's mom:
Avoid using sunlight as an excuse for temporary blindness when not watching the fuck out for stoplights. Whore.
My advice for the sun:
Try actually being in the driver's eyes next time, you faggot. Just kidding. I love you.