My Kingdom and Cookies for Better Health!!!
Hello readers, jeepers I hope most of you are doing better than I have been for the past two days. Tuesday I ended up going to the ER after having problems vomitting food stuck in my esophagus, than realized blood in my vomit. Than yesterday followed up with the doctor I saw in the ER. Let me explain more about my eating problem before I tell about my trip to the ER. For the past 3 years I have had a bad case of acid reflex, which over the years has been talking a toll on my esophagus irritating it and now possibly damaging it to where my food gets stuck, possibly tear it and I have to throw it all back up if it doesn't go down eventually. The situation completely sucks because when that happens I have excrutiating pain in my chest, adombinal pain and pain in my stomach that drives me crazy. So when I threw up I noticed blood than immediately took myself to the local ER leaving my dad with the kids at the house so they don't worry and get bored at the ER. I spent 6 hours there because luckly they had a doctor that was really concerned about my health and did some tests. Blood, x-ray, CT, urine and unpleasently a rectum test to make sure there was no blood in my stool. One thing for sure that test did confirm I wasn't going to have any close relationships with men in the future. Along with the tests a nurse gave me what she called "a disgusting drink" to cool out my stomach and numb everything out for the pain. I have tasted alot of disgusting drinks in my days but damn that nurse wasn't lying. Unfortunately after all the tests they couldn't find anything wrong but they were suprised to find out I had a horse shoe kidney which I swore they already knew. For those of you that don't know what that is, it is a kidney that doesn't seperate into two during the development of the babys' organs. It may sound cool but in reality it is not and here is why. Typically in some or if not most kidney failure cases people can have a kidney transplant or have one removed when things go wrong...for me if something goes wrong it is most likely game over. Anyways after the doctor explained they couldn't find anything wrong he still wanted to check my esophagus and stomach by putting a camera down my throat to make sure there wasn't any tears and make sure I didn't have Ulcers. Ulcers is when there is damage in the digestive system like holes or breaks by accesive contact by the stomach acids. That is not the correct technical definition but that from what I understand that is it. In most cases it is caused by alcohol abuse but I hope that is not it because I don't drink alcohol very much...although I do know regret finishing more than half a bottle of rum in one night by myself like months ago. Anyway the doctor suggested that I should make a follow up apointment so I can get a referral for a specialist for that procedure.
Yesterday I spent another hole day at the same hospital seeing that doctor and to make sure I can get that referral and to take more blood tests to see if possible have bacteria in my stomach that could also cause this. One thing if for sure I am grateful as hell this is not cancer related. My family has had a history of it, it took my moms life and recently my cousin. When I first started these issues people told me that it could be cancer related but as far as I know it is not so goody goody gum drops that is not the case. I hate my health! Yea sure most the people in the world don't have perfect health but still...as charlie brown would say AAUGH!!! It is bad enough I hate my weight but now this. Hopefully my new diet will change a few things. I am in the middle of completely changing my diet. It was like frozen food craze, no water and 5 cups off a coffee a day. But now I am staying away from frozen food with better fresh stuff, better choice of food, tea and healthier snacks.
Besides all that it has been the same, except having my brothers' girlfriend sister over which I am getting pissed off about. She hates her moms and can't stay with dad because he is in the middle of moving so for a few weeks now she has been here but I will make sure for not much longer. Sounds mean, yes but for the sake of my sanity it needs to be done. The biggest reason for that is because I do not trust her around my children. She is very protective over my her baby neice/my neice...I think because I am the uncle...cheese and crackers I feel like such a dunce. I can't remember the technical term of the family line name. Yea my memory at times when trying to remember stuff on the spot is horrible. Anyways when she is around her baby neice and my children nudge her, accidenlty hurt her or anything even if they didn't mean to, she would just get mad and be the parent. The worst case ever was when I was on the phone with stephanie (my ex for the new readers) just casually talking and all the kids were playing in the living room. My youngest ethan took a toy away from the baby, which he is only 2 and he doesn't really know good manners yet. As I was getting up to take care of it She f***in yelled and hit my son in the head which I yelled out pissed, stephanie flips out, asks what happened, I told her than she flips out! I have told her so many tmes that don't touch or even don't do anything with my kids and yet she does, like she is being a bully. In some defense I don't like to make a huge bad rep about her because she does have autism and has been bullied in school...but than again she is 15 and has that teenager mentallity which makes it that much harder. She is the echo of the house, says things that she knows is rude but says them anyway...plain and simple she needs to leave for a while. Me and my father have talked and soon he will have a talk with my brothers girlfriend to have her leave the house because I just can't take it.
Off that subject I will also like to say hi to new readers that have joined my journey. Welcome aboard and stay tuned because I just realized I haven't done any creative writing for a while so I will plan on making up for it. For those who havn't read any I will post some old ones so you know my capabilities of writing. That is all I have for this entry, any questions you have please ask and have a good one.
My Date with the Moonlight...
It is late in the evening,
My children are asleep,
The house is at peace,
I now have the time for myself,
But tonight I shall spend it elsewhere.
I dress warm and comfortable,
Step out of the house,
Climb up on the roof,
Than lay down nice and content,
So I can get the greatest view the night can present.
Ah yes the moon is big and bright,
The stars surround it give it the greatest backdrop,
The land around me illuminates by it's light,
No sound or distress to be heard,
Quiet, peaceful, as if the moon demanded it to be so.
It looks down at us,
As we dream the night away,
To watch our families snug in peace,
To enjoy the cities that do not sleep,
Until it goes away so our kids can play.
What a great wonder and sight it is,
My worry's and fears set me free,
As I gaze upon the nights beauty,
Not feeling down or lonely,
But embrace my little things I have in life.
I am sure we have all been there,
Sharing it with loved ones,
Or by yourself looking up,
When the moment hits just right,
Than we say "Wow, how beautiful."
Sorry if this seems corny and such,
But with my problems I have I try my best,
To admire the little things I have left,
And tonight I know this moment is mine,
Because the moon is my light of hope.
Guess what this is...
We all have done it no matter how short or long it is and presently here for it,
We all eventually find our path in it, through our own ways,
We all have at one point underestimate it,
We all keep having our highs and lows enduring it,
We all lose, gain and keep people when it changes tides,
We all must stride and make the best of it,
Do you know what it is...life.
*based off a horror game groundskeeper*
What's wrong with him?
The husband has said,
Looking out his window,
Watching the groundskeeper losing his head.
He is pacing back and forth in the yard,
Repeating to himself time is running out,
The sun is about to fade in the distance,
now he has begun to shout.
The husband keeps his family safe in the house,
As the groundskeeper has his episode,
The husband wants to leave with his family,
But the suspicious man blocked the main road.
The sun has now disappeared,
The groundskeeper now stand still,
The husband is in confusion,
Trying to keep his heart still.
It's now windy and dark,
The peacefull atmosphere has changed,
Groundskeeper starts to twitch,
His soul becoming deranged.
He puts on a suspicious white mask,
Eyes blacked out,
The husband is now bombarded with fear,
Feeling that their time has run out.
Yesterday I spent another hole day at the same hospital seeing that doctor and to make sure I can get that referral and to take more blood tests to see if possible have bacteria in my stomach that could also cause this. One thing if for sure I am grateful as hell this is not cancer related. My family has had a history of it, it took my moms life and recently my cousin. When I first started these issues people told me that it could be cancer related but as far as I know it is not so goody goody gum drops that is not the case. I hate my health! Yea sure most the people in the world don't have perfect health but still...as charlie brown would say AAUGH!!! It is bad enough I hate my weight but now this. Hopefully my new diet will change a few things. I am in the middle of completely changing my diet. It was like frozen food craze, no water and 5 cups off a coffee a day. But now I am staying away from frozen food with better fresh stuff, better choice of food, tea and healthier snacks.
Besides all that it has been the same, except having my brothers' girlfriend sister over which I am getting pissed off about. She hates her moms and can't stay with dad because he is in the middle of moving so for a few weeks now she has been here but I will make sure for not much longer. Sounds mean, yes but for the sake of my sanity it needs to be done. The biggest reason for that is because I do not trust her around my children. She is very protective over my her baby neice/my neice...I think because I am the uncle...cheese and crackers I feel like such a dunce. I can't remember the technical term of the family line name. Yea my memory at times when trying to remember stuff on the spot is horrible. Anyways when she is around her baby neice and my children nudge her, accidenlty hurt her or anything even if they didn't mean to, she would just get mad and be the parent. The worst case ever was when I was on the phone with stephanie (my ex for the new readers) just casually talking and all the kids were playing in the living room. My youngest ethan took a toy away from the baby, which he is only 2 and he doesn't really know good manners yet. As I was getting up to take care of it She f***in yelled and hit my son in the head which I yelled out pissed, stephanie flips out, asks what happened, I told her than she flips out! I have told her so many tmes that don't touch or even don't do anything with my kids and yet she does, like she is being a bully. In some defense I don't like to make a huge bad rep about her because she does have autism and has been bullied in school...but than again she is 15 and has that teenager mentallity which makes it that much harder. She is the echo of the house, says things that she knows is rude but says them anyway...plain and simple she needs to leave for a while. Me and my father have talked and soon he will have a talk with my brothers girlfriend to have her leave the house because I just can't take it.
Off that subject I will also like to say hi to new readers that have joined my journey. Welcome aboard and stay tuned because I just realized I haven't done any creative writing for a while so I will plan on making up for it. For those who havn't read any I will post some old ones so you know my capabilities of writing. That is all I have for this entry, any questions you have please ask and have a good one.
My Date with the Moonlight...
It is late in the evening,
My children are asleep,
The house is at peace,
I now have the time for myself,
But tonight I shall spend it elsewhere.
I dress warm and comfortable,
Step out of the house,
Climb up on the roof,
Than lay down nice and content,
So I can get the greatest view the night can present.
Ah yes the moon is big and bright,
The stars surround it give it the greatest backdrop,
The land around me illuminates by it's light,
No sound or distress to be heard,
Quiet, peaceful, as if the moon demanded it to be so.
It looks down at us,
As we dream the night away,
To watch our families snug in peace,
To enjoy the cities that do not sleep,
Until it goes away so our kids can play.
What a great wonder and sight it is,
My worry's and fears set me free,
As I gaze upon the nights beauty,
Not feeling down or lonely,
But embrace my little things I have in life.
I am sure we have all been there,
Sharing it with loved ones,
Or by yourself looking up,
When the moment hits just right,
Than we say "Wow, how beautiful."
Sorry if this seems corny and such,
But with my problems I have I try my best,
To admire the little things I have left,
And tonight I know this moment is mine,
Because the moon is my light of hope.
Guess what this is...
We all have done it no matter how short or long it is and presently here for it,
We all eventually find our path in it, through our own ways,
We all have at one point underestimate it,
We all keep having our highs and lows enduring it,
We all lose, gain and keep people when it changes tides,
We all must stride and make the best of it,
Do you know what it is...life.
*based off a horror game groundskeeper*
What's wrong with him?
The husband has said,
Looking out his window,
Watching the groundskeeper losing his head.
He is pacing back and forth in the yard,
Repeating to himself time is running out,
The sun is about to fade in the distance,
now he has begun to shout.
The husband keeps his family safe in the house,
As the groundskeeper has his episode,
The husband wants to leave with his family,
But the suspicious man blocked the main road.
The sun has now disappeared,
The groundskeeper now stand still,
The husband is in confusion,
Trying to keep his heart still.
It's now windy and dark,
The peacefull atmosphere has changed,
Groundskeeper starts to twitch,
His soul becoming deranged.
He puts on a suspicious white mask,
Eyes blacked out,
The husband is now bombarded with fear,
Feeling that their time has run out.