MinSu Valentine's Fic Exchange {Reticulating Splines} for kakkobean
Reticulating splines? What the fuck?
Junsu arches an eyebrow, sucking down a canned green tea as he spins slowly in his computer chair, waiting for the game to load. He makes a face just at the thought. Stupid Yoochun. Junsu looks forlornly at the ruined pile that was his beloved PS3, now utterly useless. And so he was relegated to the unthinkable-computer games.
The Sims 2 had been a peace offering from a bashful Yoochun, enough to temporarily get him off Junsu’s shitlist. Very temporarily if the fucking game didn’t just load already-
WELCOME TO SIMVILLE!
Boredly, Junsu clicks through the various little windows, making a face when he realizes what exactly the game seems to consist of. Namely, playing digital Barbies. Where’s the blood? The mission? The ogres? The freaking guns?
Mournfully, he lets his gaze wander back to his beloved, shorted-out console before half-heartedly clicking the Create A Family button. He has three hours to kill, might as well give the stupid thing a shot.
--
Four days, two hours and twenty minutes later, Junsu is screaming obscenities at the computer screen, clicking furiously at the ‘Go Here’ option as the flames consumed half of his kitchen.
“I don’t care if you have to go to the bathroom!” He shrieks at Sim!Junsu, smacking at the mousepad. “You’re going to die in a firey hole if you don’t go.out.side!!!”
Out of his peripheral, he notes the Grim Reaper’s approach, swearing as he makes a last ditch effort to save his digital self before he’s sucked into the Sim afterlife and becomes nothing more than an urn on the living room floor.
“Son of a bitch!” He spits, clicking out of the game furiously, huffing out an indignant breath. Glares at the screen for ten minutes before logging onto the net, searching ‘Sim cheat codes’ and scanning forums.
What starts as ‘keeping my SIm from burning alive due to their inherent stupidity and lack of priority recognition’ turns into a frenzy of bookmarking, everything from being able to delete the piles of trash his Sims leave everywhere, to being able to steal the car that comes to pick his Sims up for work and most importantly, a cash code.
It’s then that he stumbles across the more…eccentric codes.
Junsu clicks, grin widening in delight as his eyes rove the screen.
An evil idea forms.
--
Junsu tries to muffle his snickers in his shirt, dying as he watches a very pregnant Jaejoong!Sim waddle across the screen. Turning red from laughter, he makes Yunho go and give him a backrub, nearly pissing himself when the hormonal Jaejoong shrugs him off angrily.
He’s stuck Yoochun at the piano, Changmin studying for college and has graciously allowed Junsu!Sim to play video games in his giant upstairs bedroom. He felt the giant heart shaped vibrating bed would be a nice touch when Junsu!Sim needed to entertain the ladies.
Jaejoong!Sim runs to the bathroom to throw up.
“What are you cackling about?”
Junsu nearly jumps out of his skin, whirling around in his chair to block the screen. “N-nothing.” Smiles a little too brightly at Yunho. “Is dinner ready? I’m ready for dinner.”
He’s up out ofhis seat in the next second, flushed red with embarrassment and amusement, dragging Yunho out and towards the kitchen.
Forgetting, in his haste, to pause the game.
-
When he returns, things are in a state of chaos. YunJae aren’t speaking to each other and Yoochun has wet himself because the bathroom is blocked by trash and Changmin and Junsu!Sim are nowhere to be found.
At least, until he looks upstairs and finds them making out in his master bathroom.
Junsu stares in horror for what feels like forever, watching Junsu!Sims green bar climb higher and higher, before he hurriedly goes into buy mode, snatching Changmin up and moving him to the other end of the house.
What the hell?
Frantically pausing, he hurries to remove any and all free will from the rogue bastards, staring at the screen in bewilderment. Biting his lip, Junsu hesitantly clicks on Junsu!Sim’s profile and then the relationship button, eyes widening into the shape of saucers at the sight of the tiny heart next to Changmin!Sim’s name.
He gulps audibly.
He’s in love with Changmin?!
No, you idiot. It’s a game. You just have very gay Sims and that happens when male Sims live in a house full of other male Sims but it does NOT happen to REAL people. Get a motherfreaking grip.
Chewing on his lip, Junsu goes back to play mode, very decisively making Junsu!Sim go and tell Changmin!Sim a joke. If anything will break up the love, it’s his sense of humour.
To his astonishment, Changmin!Sim laughs.
Dammit.
Junsu watches little green pluses radiate from their heads.
Flicks his gaze towards the door.
Lets his mouse hover over the ‘romantic kiss’ button. Watches as his character takes Changmin’s in a loving embrace and sticks his digtal tongue down Min’s digital throat.
Holy crap.
Junsu’s eyes slide to the large, heart-shaped, vibrating bed, the one that would be loads of useful once Junsu!Sim got himself a date.
Reaching over, Junsu locks the bedroom door.
-
He has a hard time looking at Changmin the next day.
-
“Hyung, give me my laptop,” Changmin half growls, half whines, looming menacingly over Jaejoong’s shoulder, knowing his bandmate hates it. But instead of his laptop, it earns him a smack in the arm and a threat to let him starve if he doesn’t find something else to occupy himself for the next two hours.
Sulking down the hall (it’s his computer, dammit), Changmin ninjas his way into his and Junsu’s shared workroom, giving a quick glance around to make sure Junsu hadn’t teleported back from the studio or sequestered himself in the closet, then brings his hyung’s computer to life.
Easily breaks in past Junsu’s username and password block and fishes around for something interesting. Quirks an eyebrow at the little icon titled The Sims 2 and settles in for waste some time and braincells of video games.
And ooh, look. Dong Bang Shin Ki has it’s own house.
-
It starts with a roll of the eyes over the size of Junsu’s room, interspersed with near suffocating laughter at the sight of what his hyungs done to YunJae. It ends with wide eyes and an open mouth when he notices the bed in Junsu’s room.
And who’s occupying it.
-
Stretching lazily, Junsu kicks his shoes off at the door, nodding to Jaejoong and wandering back to the bathroom for a piss, too many chilled coffees required to get him through recording.
Relieves himself casually, deciding today’s not a lightsaber battle day, and is zipping up his jeans when suddenly the door bursts open. Junsu squeaks.
“Honestly, don’t you freaking-Hi, Changminnie,” he stutters, hip knocking into the sink. He can’t even look at the younger boy without blushing anymore.
Changmin tilts his head in curiosity.
“So who was going to get knocked up?”
Junsu blinks. “Huh?”
“On the game. You weren’t going to get me pregnant, were you?”
Junsu wants to curl up and die quietly on the bathroom floor. Maybe under the sink next to Yoochun’s hair gel and Jaejoong’s stomach wax.
“Look, Min, I was just fooling around, it’s not like-
A pair of warm soft lips meet his. Changmin smiles, poking Junsu’s cheek as the elder boy does his best goldfish impersonation.
“Better in real life, isn’t it?”
Junsu is blushing too fiercely to reply. Changmin doesn’t seem to mind. If the Sims have taught him anything, it’s that words are overrated.
-
Outside, in the hallway, Yoochun knocks for the fourth time, legs crossed in a desperate attempt to seal his bladder, groaning loudly.
“Why’s it always me?”