Family Values, Biblical Style pt. 5
I made a mistake on the family tree thingy. Milcah is married to Nachor and is the daughter of Haran, not the other way around. Doesn't really change much.
We left off with Abraham marrying some other lady that was mentioned once, Keturah, and begetting a bunch of kids before dying. Well, before he does that, he sends his oldest servant to go and find a wife for Isaac. Nowadays, we place a hand on our hearts when we make a pledge. Back then, they put their hands on each other's groins. Actually, probably more like the femoral artery, but still. "Put your hand under my thigh, and go find a wife from my relatives..." So the servant goes off with a bunch of camels and goes up to the city of Nachor. (Remember Nachor?)
The servant gets an idea, he decides that whichever woman in town will give him and his camels water, that's the girl for Isaac. Rebecca comes out, Abraham's great-niece, he seems to know that she's a virgin, and she's pretty, and she gives not only him water, but she offers his camels water too. So she's good to animals. He gives her a nose ring and some bracelets, goes to her father's house, tells her father the story, and her father's all, "Sure, you can have her!"
So, the servant gets to take Rebecca back to Isaac. She keeps her face covered until the servant can tell Isaac the story of the well and the camels. Isaac takes her into his (dead) mother's tent. She becomes his wife, he loves her, and that's how he becomes happy again after his mother's death. (It never says that Rebecca removes her veil. I'm assuming that happens in the 'he loves her' part.)
So THEN we get the Abraham taking another woman (who may or may not be Hagar) and then we get Ishmael's begats. Ishmael marries an Egyptian. Abraham only cares that Isaac marries one of his relatives. Or at least Isaac is the only it's mentioned about.
Isaac is 40 when he marries Rebecca. Isaac must have learned something from his father, because he doesn't wait until his wife is 90 before complaining to G-d. It's the sentence AFTER we learn he's 40 that we learn she's barren, and the sentence after that she notices that the children within her are agitated. (Sounds like a laundry machine.) G-d tells her that there are two nations in her, and they will be separated, and the older will serve the younger.
Child A is born first, red and hairy, they name him Esav (Esau). Child B came out grasping Esau's heel, so they named him Jacob, which is a pun (it's actually a double-pun, the word means many things depending on inflection)... it doesn't work in English.
This actually took 20 years, because suddenly Isaac is 60. Esau is a hunter. Jacob is a scholar of some sort.
One day, Jacob is cooking something red. Esau has a lot to do with the color red, he has red coloring, he works in the red fields, and with the red earth... his name change here becomes a play on the word 'red' in Hebrew. Esau wants the red stuff, because red is HIS thing. Jacob does the bratty little brother thing, "What'll you give me? Will you give me your birthright? Hmm? Hmm?"
Esau, overreacter that he is, says, "I'm dying, give it! I don't need a birthright, I want the RED!" So, Esau gave up his birthright for some lentils.
Now Isaac tries to pass Rebecca off as his sister with Abimelech. Abimelech realizes that sleeping with another man's wife is bad. "Whoever molests this man or his wife will be put to death." Non-G-d-believing decree, there. Just throwing that in for narrative's sake. Abimelech is jealous of Isaac and sends him on his way. (Also, I'm not sure Abimelech is a specific king or a title for a king of a particular area. You'd think if it was one man, he'd get tired of this particular ploy by this family.)
Rebecca's favorite child is Jacob. Isaac's favorite is Esau. Don't know why... just go with it.
Esau starts marrying Canaanite women. This doesn't please his father or his mother.
Isaac starts going blind. He summons Esau to give him his birthright, asking him to get him some fresh game and prepare it for him. Rebecca overhears this, and tells Jacob to go get some goats and she'll prepare them for Isaac. Jacob says, "I have smooth skin, Esau has hairy skin, Dad'll know what's what." (Because blind people are stupid.)
Jacob goes and puts goat skins on his arms so he would be hairy like his brother, and goes to talk to his father with the food his mother prepared. Isaac can tell the voice is Jacob's, but he feels and sure enough, hairy hands.
He serves his dad, Isaac blesses Jacob.
Now, two ways to read this. Either Jacob is incredibly stupid (because blind/old people are stupid), or Jacob knew what was going on, knew Esau had given away his birthright, knew that Esau was marrying Canaanite women, and knew that really Jacob was the better choice for this blessing.
And really, this is over a BLESSING. "Bless those who bless you, curse those who curse you. May G-d give you the fatness of the earth." Nope, only one of these to go around...
Esau comes back with his game and food, and I really love this line in the Hebrew, because it really actually stammers. "What, where, someone came in with food, I gave him a blessing, he gets to keep it!" It almost tries too hard, which is why I like the second interpretation over the blind and old people are stupid approach. Esau says, "Bless me too!"
This is one of those sections in Torah, where it really feels human. Maybe not adult human, but kids fighting over something? Isaac decides he can give a blessing too.
Oh, wait, before I go on, here's where that other pun in Jacob's name comes in. Jacob, along with having 'heel' in his name, also has a word that can mean 'ambush' or 'outsmart'. Jacob keeps outwitting Esau here. So one of the things he does is say, "Is this why you named him that?"
The blessing Esau gets? It sucks. "By your sword you shall live, but your brother you shall serve..."
Esau says the next time he sees Jacob, he'll kill him.
Rebecca hears this and sends Jacob away to her brother to find a wife.
Esau decides that marrying all the Canaanite women isn't working out, he should keep it in the family, too, and marries his cousin on Ishmael's side.
Next time, Jacob has a lot of kids with four mothers.
We left off with Abraham marrying some other lady that was mentioned once, Keturah, and begetting a bunch of kids before dying. Well, before he does that, he sends his oldest servant to go and find a wife for Isaac. Nowadays, we place a hand on our hearts when we make a pledge. Back then, they put their hands on each other's groins. Actually, probably more like the femoral artery, but still. "Put your hand under my thigh, and go find a wife from my relatives..." So the servant goes off with a bunch of camels and goes up to the city of Nachor. (Remember Nachor?)
The servant gets an idea, he decides that whichever woman in town will give him and his camels water, that's the girl for Isaac. Rebecca comes out, Abraham's great-niece, he seems to know that she's a virgin, and she's pretty, and she gives not only him water, but she offers his camels water too. So she's good to animals. He gives her a nose ring and some bracelets, goes to her father's house, tells her father the story, and her father's all, "Sure, you can have her!"
So, the servant gets to take Rebecca back to Isaac. She keeps her face covered until the servant can tell Isaac the story of the well and the camels. Isaac takes her into his (dead) mother's tent. She becomes his wife, he loves her, and that's how he becomes happy again after his mother's death. (It never says that Rebecca removes her veil. I'm assuming that happens in the 'he loves her' part.)
So THEN we get the Abraham taking another woman (who may or may not be Hagar) and then we get Ishmael's begats. Ishmael marries an Egyptian. Abraham only cares that Isaac marries one of his relatives. Or at least Isaac is the only it's mentioned about.
Isaac is 40 when he marries Rebecca. Isaac must have learned something from his father, because he doesn't wait until his wife is 90 before complaining to G-d. It's the sentence AFTER we learn he's 40 that we learn she's barren, and the sentence after that she notices that the children within her are agitated. (Sounds like a laundry machine.) G-d tells her that there are two nations in her, and they will be separated, and the older will serve the younger.
Child A is born first, red and hairy, they name him Esav (Esau). Child B came out grasping Esau's heel, so they named him Jacob, which is a pun (it's actually a double-pun, the word means many things depending on inflection)... it doesn't work in English.
This actually took 20 years, because suddenly Isaac is 60. Esau is a hunter. Jacob is a scholar of some sort.
One day, Jacob is cooking something red. Esau has a lot to do with the color red, he has red coloring, he works in the red fields, and with the red earth... his name change here becomes a play on the word 'red' in Hebrew. Esau wants the red stuff, because red is HIS thing. Jacob does the bratty little brother thing, "What'll you give me? Will you give me your birthright? Hmm? Hmm?"
Esau, overreacter that he is, says, "I'm dying, give it! I don't need a birthright, I want the RED!" So, Esau gave up his birthright for some lentils.
Now Isaac tries to pass Rebecca off as his sister with Abimelech. Abimelech realizes that sleeping with another man's wife is bad. "Whoever molests this man or his wife will be put to death." Non-G-d-believing decree, there. Just throwing that in for narrative's sake. Abimelech is jealous of Isaac and sends him on his way. (Also, I'm not sure Abimelech is a specific king or a title for a king of a particular area. You'd think if it was one man, he'd get tired of this particular ploy by this family.)
Rebecca's favorite child is Jacob. Isaac's favorite is Esau. Don't know why... just go with it.
Esau starts marrying Canaanite women. This doesn't please his father or his mother.
Isaac starts going blind. He summons Esau to give him his birthright, asking him to get him some fresh game and prepare it for him. Rebecca overhears this, and tells Jacob to go get some goats and she'll prepare them for Isaac. Jacob says, "I have smooth skin, Esau has hairy skin, Dad'll know what's what." (Because blind people are stupid.)
Jacob goes and puts goat skins on his arms so he would be hairy like his brother, and goes to talk to his father with the food his mother prepared. Isaac can tell the voice is Jacob's, but he feels and sure enough, hairy hands.
He serves his dad, Isaac blesses Jacob.
Now, two ways to read this. Either Jacob is incredibly stupid (because blind/old people are stupid), or Jacob knew what was going on, knew Esau had given away his birthright, knew that Esau was marrying Canaanite women, and knew that really Jacob was the better choice for this blessing.
And really, this is over a BLESSING. "Bless those who bless you, curse those who curse you. May G-d give you the fatness of the earth." Nope, only one of these to go around...
Esau comes back with his game and food, and I really love this line in the Hebrew, because it really actually stammers. "What, where, someone came in with food, I gave him a blessing, he gets to keep it!" It almost tries too hard, which is why I like the second interpretation over the blind and old people are stupid approach. Esau says, "Bless me too!"
This is one of those sections in Torah, where it really feels human. Maybe not adult human, but kids fighting over something? Isaac decides he can give a blessing too.
Oh, wait, before I go on, here's where that other pun in Jacob's name comes in. Jacob, along with having 'heel' in his name, also has a word that can mean 'ambush' or 'outsmart'. Jacob keeps outwitting Esau here. So one of the things he does is say, "Is this why you named him that?"
The blessing Esau gets? It sucks. "By your sword you shall live, but your brother you shall serve..."
Esau says the next time he sees Jacob, he'll kill him.
Rebecca hears this and sends Jacob away to her brother to find a wife.
Esau decides that marrying all the Canaanite women isn't working out, he should keep it in the family, too, and marries his cousin on Ishmael's side.
Next time, Jacob has a lot of kids with four mothers.