Need to voice the pain

[milly28]

The woman at Safeway had her cheeks. I looked at them as the woman fumbled with the plastic bag and it was as though she was right before me. I felt her, I smelled her, but I couldn't touch her. I tried to block the feelings I had. Until tonight and the movie. He felt so much pain and it changed him; all because he could see them in the people on the street. It hurt so much. It was as though my half healed heart was torn apart. I haven't missed her this much until now; not even when it all happened. I will never get to see her rosy cheeks again, or her nose that moved up and down happily when she talked, or her bright blue eyes, or (most sorrowfully) her simple smile. The pain is horrid; feeling so close to her but knowing it is forever impossible. There is no way to even explain it. Even worse, I want to feel close, I want to think they're hers, I try to see those cheeks and it just makes it hurt more. The psychological pain moved to physical. My head hurts, my nose is bloody, I feel sick to my stomach, and my eyes are burning more than ever before.

How is it possible to feel so much?