what i thought and bought today
i like today. some days just have a certain flow. actually, an uncertain flow. but in a good way. i may be a bit delirious from lack of sleep, because i was woken by a mosquito way too early and i had trouble falling back asleep and had to wake up at 9 anyway. lars and i ventured out as usual, and as usual he wanted to go this way and i wanted to go the that one. so, he wins because i don't trust him unattended. something scared him on the lawn so much he jumped up in the air with his tail all puffed. a small bat, quite dead. i rolled it over to make sure and the tiny carcass undulated wildly with maggots underneath the silky, black pelt. i could see them through the little hole there, bellies full. i think i might be csi material. death generally fascinates me rather than freaks me out. it stinks though.
so the day began slightly morbidly, but it didn't stay that way so you can keep on reading even if you're squeamish. some of my balcony plants were near death, though, when i visited my apartment, but i'm hopeful they'll pull through. the chilis were quite poorly. i watered them all generously and wished them well. fenugreek seeds had sprouted and the little white poppies had bloomed and withered. it was strange to go home like that, like it was someone else's place. or rather that i was a snooping stranger. there was less mail than i expected, but a post card from aaron had arrived, which made me very happy with a twist of melancholy. i miss that boy.
i have had my eyes on this somewhat kitchy lampshade on an antique shop window for a long time, a pink one with deer on. i always thought the number on the sticker was a catalogue number, but today i found out it was the price. more than 300 euros. way more. wow. i had been shy of asking, because i figured if it was really expensive it might be like 50€, and i couldn't afford it. well, i guess i can always go look at it in the window, because who on earth has that kind of money to spend on a lampshade?
i returned my of montreal ticket and thought i did a good job swallowing the bitter edge on my 'no' as a response to whether i was going to the helsinki gig. i have given up on those, people. from now on i will entertain myself solely by singing psycho killer to myself until the end of time. the song won't leave my head! it's not the best soundtrack for picking blueberries. in the forest. alone. it's good to sing in the woods, mom says, so bears know you're coming. i just hope they dig david byrne. on the same, ahem, note: the new kitchen has good acoustics. even my voice sounds kind of nice when i sing loud and low.
the turku trip was all about tagging along while dad shopped. and then i spent too much, but nothing i got was full price besides the lotto ticket and lollipop. and the lovely sandwich i ate at cafe piknik later, but daddy paid for that anyway. the 2nd season carnivale dvds were all gone in anttila and they didn't have any new ones arriving. i was so stupid not buying it the first time i saw them. sure, it will be on tv soon enough. i won't be having one. my plan was to buy shows on dvd and pretend i do. as a consolation i got amelie for less than six euros, and the oddly flirty clerk gave me a size larger plastic bag, for i had a magazine (trendi, reduced price) under arm. i just managed an uneasy smile and a thank-you, when he said something that was upposedly clever and cute.
i saw lovely things at antique and thrift shops, like beautifully aged grayish blue bed-ends and nice 50's chairs. i was looking for a table for the balcony, but had no luck. i was severely tempted by old wooden drinks crates, especially the leijona whisky ones. in the end i bought a 2-kilo weight for a tenner which was a bit much for me but i love and need them, so i figured if i don't buy one i'll never make it back there later and even if do, they'll all be gone. now that i have one, i'm likely to be tempted to go back for more. i need like two or three still. they're handy for bookbinding.
i was very pleased with myself, but i ended up with even more good and cheap stuff, but not without a bit of a struggle of course. kodin 1 offered wicker baskets with a plastic lining for next to nothing and i jumped at the chance, but they had wrong discount price stickers on, and i knew it would be trouble. sure enough i ended up at the customer service counter for refunds. i sure am grateful for bar codes. along with the baskets, i adopted a silvery twig-like plant i love, but always forget the name. and i bought a gevalia cappuccino dajm bar. bad of me, i know. but then again, i did purchase the instant gevalia cappuccino with "dajm inside!" during my vammala days. so the circle kind of got closed. it was good. and now i have already eaten all the chocolate i was supposed to ration for days. there was a bar of fazer's chili too... no wonder i'm so giddy. in my defence, i have been stuck here without chocolate for over a week, and then dad left a geisha bar in the fruit bowl. i bet he knows full well i can't stand the stuff! nonetheless it sparked my craving. i very nearly opened it up to suck on the corners of pure chocolate last night. it's less safe than dad thinks.
i took some pictures outside and gathered a handful of delicious wild strawberries that seem to be ripening all over the place. i ate them all on one go, put the whole lot in my mouth at once. usually i tend to savour each one individually but there's so many of them now. i'm breaking my cast a bit, stretching the seams here and there. i definitely feel like i'm renewing in certain ways and i find i can't do anything about it. maybe i'm just shedding a skin that has gotten too tight. metaphorically. physically the skin is loose, i have trouble gaining my weight back to where it should be. maybe that's why i felt like i had to buy the two kilos there and then?
after a simple yet delicious chick pea & tofu veggie wok i watched without a trace and then hopped channels into beck performing with a bunch of guys playing tableware as instruments. and a tedious group later, m. ward played fuel for fire! jools holland has the best music show i know. sure enough, i had forgotten my video tape home for the second time. i love how m. ward looks so cool in pictures but when playing he's like a little gnome. one of my fave songs, too.
it began to rain after sex and the city and i just had to run outside and get wet, which was fun for like ten seconds. it's cold out there. i did a little carrie in paris -dance and ran back in. it made me happy but a part of me wished i could stay in the rain kissing and not feeling cold at all.
so the day began slightly morbidly, but it didn't stay that way so you can keep on reading even if you're squeamish. some of my balcony plants were near death, though, when i visited my apartment, but i'm hopeful they'll pull through. the chilis were quite poorly. i watered them all generously and wished them well. fenugreek seeds had sprouted and the little white poppies had bloomed and withered. it was strange to go home like that, like it was someone else's place. or rather that i was a snooping stranger. there was less mail than i expected, but a post card from aaron had arrived, which made me very happy with a twist of melancholy. i miss that boy.
i have had my eyes on this somewhat kitchy lampshade on an antique shop window for a long time, a pink one with deer on. i always thought the number on the sticker was a catalogue number, but today i found out it was the price. more than 300 euros. way more. wow. i had been shy of asking, because i figured if it was really expensive it might be like 50€, and i couldn't afford it. well, i guess i can always go look at it in the window, because who on earth has that kind of money to spend on a lampshade?
i returned my of montreal ticket and thought i did a good job swallowing the bitter edge on my 'no' as a response to whether i was going to the helsinki gig. i have given up on those, people. from now on i will entertain myself solely by singing psycho killer to myself until the end of time. the song won't leave my head! it's not the best soundtrack for picking blueberries. in the forest. alone. it's good to sing in the woods, mom says, so bears know you're coming. i just hope they dig david byrne. on the same, ahem, note: the new kitchen has good acoustics. even my voice sounds kind of nice when i sing loud and low.
the turku trip was all about tagging along while dad shopped. and then i spent too much, but nothing i got was full price besides the lotto ticket and lollipop. and the lovely sandwich i ate at cafe piknik later, but daddy paid for that anyway. the 2nd season carnivale dvds were all gone in anttila and they didn't have any new ones arriving. i was so stupid not buying it the first time i saw them. sure, it will be on tv soon enough. i won't be having one. my plan was to buy shows on dvd and pretend i do. as a consolation i got amelie for less than six euros, and the oddly flirty clerk gave me a size larger plastic bag, for i had a magazine (trendi, reduced price) under arm. i just managed an uneasy smile and a thank-you, when he said something that was upposedly clever and cute.
i saw lovely things at antique and thrift shops, like beautifully aged grayish blue bed-ends and nice 50's chairs. i was looking for a table for the balcony, but had no luck. i was severely tempted by old wooden drinks crates, especially the leijona whisky ones. in the end i bought a 2-kilo weight for a tenner which was a bit much for me but i love and need them, so i figured if i don't buy one i'll never make it back there later and even if do, they'll all be gone. now that i have one, i'm likely to be tempted to go back for more. i need like two or three still. they're handy for bookbinding.
i was very pleased with myself, but i ended up with even more good and cheap stuff, but not without a bit of a struggle of course. kodin 1 offered wicker baskets with a plastic lining for next to nothing and i jumped at the chance, but they had wrong discount price stickers on, and i knew it would be trouble. sure enough i ended up at the customer service counter for refunds. i sure am grateful for bar codes. along with the baskets, i adopted a silvery twig-like plant i love, but always forget the name. and i bought a gevalia cappuccino dajm bar. bad of me, i know. but then again, i did purchase the instant gevalia cappuccino with "dajm inside!" during my vammala days. so the circle kind of got closed. it was good. and now i have already eaten all the chocolate i was supposed to ration for days. there was a bar of fazer's chili too... no wonder i'm so giddy. in my defence, i have been stuck here without chocolate for over a week, and then dad left a geisha bar in the fruit bowl. i bet he knows full well i can't stand the stuff! nonetheless it sparked my craving. i very nearly opened it up to suck on the corners of pure chocolate last night. it's less safe than dad thinks.
i took some pictures outside and gathered a handful of delicious wild strawberries that seem to be ripening all over the place. i ate them all on one go, put the whole lot in my mouth at once. usually i tend to savour each one individually but there's so many of them now. i'm breaking my cast a bit, stretching the seams here and there. i definitely feel like i'm renewing in certain ways and i find i can't do anything about it. maybe i'm just shedding a skin that has gotten too tight. metaphorically. physically the skin is loose, i have trouble gaining my weight back to where it should be. maybe that's why i felt like i had to buy the two kilos there and then?
after a simple yet delicious chick pea & tofu veggie wok i watched without a trace and then hopped channels into beck performing with a bunch of guys playing tableware as instruments. and a tedious group later, m. ward played fuel for fire! jools holland has the best music show i know. sure enough, i had forgotten my video tape home for the second time. i love how m. ward looks so cool in pictures but when playing he's like a little gnome. one of my fave songs, too.
it began to rain after sex and the city and i just had to run outside and get wet, which was fun for like ten seconds. it's cold out there. i did a little carrie in paris -dance and ran back in. it made me happy but a part of me wished i could stay in the rain kissing and not feeling cold at all.