(Untitled)

[crabbycustomer]

Okay. He's done it. It took a lot of work, but he's done it

Comments

[margolotta]

"Oh, that sounds so handy!"

A posh lady in a pink sweater embroidered with bats approaches, after having read the sign.

[crabbycustomer]

"IT IS, IT IS HANDY AS SHIT," he says. He remembers her, the bizarro reverse vampire.

[margolotta]

"I'd be happy to have one, to stay in contact with friends here," Margolotta says, smiling.

[crabbycustomer]

"OKAY, WELL, I GAVE ONE TO THE BAR SO IT KNOWS HOW TO DISPENSE THEM NOW, IT SHOULD SET EVERYTHING UP AUTOMATICALLY WHEN YOU ACTIVATE IT. DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW TO USE A COMPUTER AT ALL?"

[margolotta]

"No, none at all," Margolotta says. "But I use the clacks a lot."

[crabbycustomer]

"OKAY I DON'T KNOW WHAT THAT IS BUT IT SOUNDS--DIFFERENT FROM THIS."

Best behavior, damn it. "I CAN SHOW YOU THE BASICS IF YOU WANT."

[margolotta]

"We send short messages over the clacks, very fast," Margolotta says, "but they have found ways to code and clacks even pictures. I use it for getting news, of course, but also to play Thud with a friend. But I'd be very grateful if you showed me how that thing works."

[crabbycustomer]

"THAT SOUNDS LIKE THE INTERNET WITHOUT COMPUTERS, WHICH IS JUST... IT MAKES MY SPONGE ACHE. BUT YEAH, GO GRAB ONE AND I WILL SHOW YOU."

[margolotta]

Margolotta walks over to the bar and comes back with one of the small handheld devices.

[crabbycustomer]

It is a thin oblong, not unlike an iPod, but the textures are different. The backplate is smooth and cool as porcelain, slightly scalloped, and the screen itself is fleshy and moist. There is a green slime reservoir set in the back; inert, the device is grey until a user color is assigned.

"OKAY SO PRESS DOWN ON THE SLIME RESERVOIR TO TURN IT ON, IT WILL ASSIGN YOU A TROLLTAG AND USER COLOR AUTOMATICALLY."

[margolotta]

Margolotta presses on the squishy part, and then turns purple.

abstemiousCountess, it says.

[crabbycustomer]

The setup screen will fade away to the chumproll thereafter. "OKAY, SO YOU ARE LOOKING AT THE CHUMPROLL, IT'S A LIST OF EVERYONE WHO HAS THE SOFTWARE IN THE BAR. THERE'S YOU AND ME AND SOME PONIES AND A HANDFUL OF OTHER PEOPLE, BUT ONLY THE ONES SIGNED ON ARE LIT UP, DO YOU SEE?"

[margolotta]

"Like the one that says argenteanSerpent in bright pink?" Margolotta says, pointing.

[crabbycustomer]

"YEAH, THAT'S SIRONA'S TROLLTAG. YOU CAN TAP ANY OF THESE PEOPLE AND IT WILL OPEN A NEW WINDOW... I MEAN IT WILL CHANGE THE SCREEN TO SHOW A... PAGE WHERE YOU BOTH CAN WRITE. AM I DUMBING THIS DOWN ENOUGH?"

[margolotta]

Margolotta taps the name, and writes 'HELLO?'

"Yes, you are," she says, cheerfully.

[crabbycustomer]

"WELL, THAT'S ABOUT IT. SHE WILL SEE WHAT YOU TYPED, AND THEN SHE WILL TYPE SOME STUFF AND YOU WILL SEE THAT, AND YOU JUST TALK. THERE'S A LITTLE BUTTON IN THE CORNER TO CLOSE THE WINDOW."

"IF YOU PULL ON THE IMAGE IT WILL SLIDE TO THE LEFT AND SHOW YOU THE CHUMPROLL AGAIN, AND IF YOU HAVE MORE THAN ONE CONVERSATION YOU CAN FLIP BETWEEN SCREENS BY GOING UP AND DOWN. THERE IS SOME OTHER STUFF BUT YOU CAN FIGURE IT OUT AS YOU GO, YOU WILL BE FINE WITH THAT MUCH."