(Untitled)

[gone_byebye]

"Bar," says Ray as he walks in, "I really hate doing this, but the library at the Firehouse is more than a little bit specialized and I'm currently persona non grata at the New York Public Library's main branch. By any chance could you recommend a book on negotiation for me, and possibly a really good biography of Andrew Jackson? Specifically the

Comments

[riversinger]

"How does one become persona non grata at a library, anyway?" River grins and waves at Ray from the far side of the bar.

[gone_byebye]

"Well, at this point it has to do with the fact that the last time I was there I happened to be in the company of the Deep One ambassador to the United States," Ray says, "and the central branch on Fifth and Forty-First happens to be built on the former location of a major city reservoir as well as being highly paranormally active even under the best of circumstances. Quite a lot of restless drowning victims made their presence known when we were there, and it cheesed off the administration."

[riversinger]

"That would certainly do it. Even in my time, books and water do not play well together. And of course, your mere presence was all the evidence they needed to assign blame." River shakes her head. Bureaucrats.

"And if I may be so bold, who are you going to be negotiating with?"

[gone_byebye]

"In this particular case? The returned-from-the-dead-and-remarkably-cranky-about-it spirit of the late President Andrew Jackson," says Ray. "Were you by any chance one of the people I told about the sheer number of Presidents my world had suddenly rising from the grave?"

[riversinger]

"Mmmmno, I don't believe so. Risen, as in non-corporeal manifestations? Or risen as reanimated corpses?"

She can't decide which might be worse.

[gone_byebye]

"The latter," Ray says. "It began with Ulysses Grant punching his way out of his tomb and jumping into the Hudson River before anyone could stop him. Turned out not to be confined to presidents, either, since the next incident involved Alexander Hamilton clawing his way out of Trinity Churchyard."

[riversinger]

"Oh dear. So, not a localised phenomenon then? And I take it Mr. Hamilton has hung around to be negotiated with? He hasn't taken hostages or anything unpresidential, has he?"

[gone_byebye]

Ray grimaces. "Actually, as a matter of fact... well, I'd suggest putting any beverages aside for a while, since the background behind all of this made the cops who got involved snort milk out their nose laughing. Just a warning."

[riversinger]

River carefully sets her Guinness aside and leans in, chin on her hands.

[gone_byebye]

"It all started a few years ago, in September of 2007, when we were called in to deal with a madman at the Empire State Building calling himself Dark Lord Ivan von Stabbington the Third," Ray says. "Ivan had issues. Ivan had bound and indexed volumes. More to the point, Ivan had an arcane knowledge background developed through years of teenage nerdery during the years leading up to the Gozer Incident such that despite a total inability to manipulate or interact with PKE for most of his life, he found himself entirely capable of making paranormal energy his puppy, if not outright his bitch."

[riversinger]

"von Stabbington? Dark... Lord?" River has to press her hand over her mouth to keep from giggling.

[gone_byebye]

"He'd legally had his name changed to Ivan von Stabbington some time back," Ray says with a shrug. "The Dark Lord part was his own invention. Anyway, Mr. von Stabbington had been nursing a grudge against the Disney Corporation since he was five years old, dating back to his mother putting him on the People-Mover ride at Disneyworld and telling him it was actually the Space Mountain roller coaster. 'Complicit in her lies' was how he put it, from what I recall, although I was a little busy while he was ranting, since, well, he was using stored psychokinetic energy to get ready to launch the Empire State Building at Cinderella's Castle and he'd raised one of the building's major shareholders from the dead as a zombie to keep the NYPD or any other agencies of note from interfering with his plan."

"Yes, the entire building. Yes, from New York City all the way to Florida."

[riversinger]

"Ambitious." She doesn't know Disneyland, but she can ask Richard later. And she doesn't know the legalities of how one can be dead and a major shareholder, but that's business for you. "How on earth did he get so powerful?"

[gone_byebye]

Well, she'd been one of the shareholders. When she was, y'know, alive

[riversinger]

River's expression goes from amused to intent. It doesn't matter that such a transfer was ludicrous, Ecto is Ray's daughter and one doesn't go after pack like that. Not without consequences.

"I take it he didn't succeed."

[gone_byebye]

"Thankfully, no, but it was an awkward week or two for the both of us," Ray says. "I got in the way, and we spent a week with my consciousness in her body and vice versa. She wasn't exactly used to not having wheels."