Day Three

[not_toothfairy]

[OOM: " WASSERMAN!!It's the third and final day of Cubefall. By now, most everybody who comes to the Bar regularly probably knows about it. Still, new people turn up all the time- and after the other day, well, Ironhide's sort of curious whether humans really find the holiday as disturbing and alien as all that. Thus he's taken it upon himself to

Comments

[director_global]

He's moving slowly about the room, examining the details of things with every sign of great interest.

Stark pauses by the booth and reads the sign, then focuses on Ironhide.

"Happy Cubefall to you too." A beat. "That is the proper greeting, I assume?"

[not_toothfairy]

"Yup," says Ironhide. "Least it was in my part of Cybertron. This your first one in the Bar?"

(Not that Bar's marked it more than once before this, but still.)

[director_global]

"My first one anywhere; especially here."

He doesn't have the features with which to smile, and the machine-generated voice isn't quite human, of course, but he manages to convey a sense of pleasure anyway.

"I'm glad, though. I wouldn't have missed this for anything."

[not_toothfairy]

"That makes two of us."

This, folks, is as close as Ironhide gets to sentimentality.

"Don't think I know you. Name's Ironhide."

[director_global]

"Nathan Stark. Glad to meet you."

He examines the sign again, then refocuses on Ironhide.

"You mentioned you were from Cybertron, and the screen indicated that this holiday is Cybertronian in origin. I presume this is your usual form, then?"

[not_toothfairy]

"When I'm in bot mode, yup," says Ironhide. "You're human the rest of the time, I'm gonna guess?"

[director_global]

"Usually, yes," Stark confirms.

"Although I will admit to more than a passing interest in robotics and cybernetics."

As well as computer programming and artificial intelligence, but it seems impolite to mention it, as there's nothing 'artificial' about the being he's conversing with.

[not_toothfairy]

Ironhide grunts. "Makes sense," he says. Primus knows he'd be interested, if he were a squishy. "Got any questions about your configuration I can answer? I don't normally do new human orientation, but I got here first today."

[director_global]

"First? How many more of you visit here?"

Stark extends his hand, opening and closing his fingers as though testing their operation.

"I'm still getting accustomed to the nuances of this form," he says. There's a shade of thoughtful consideration in the mechanized voice. "Might you have any recommendations for facilitating the process, or with respect to features that I might not be aware of?"

[not_toothfairy]

"Me, Bumblebee, and sometimes Optimus Prime and Ratchet." Ironhide shrugs. "There's more than one universe's Cybertron represented here, but Rad and Lionizer're from one that doesn't celebrate Cubefall."

"We had a sprite have to get uploaded into a blank protoform once. First thing we did to get him accustomed to working his systems was head outside and start testing them all, one at a time. Including going to alt mode, but you might not have one of those..."

[director_global]

"Hmm."

He half-pivots, searching out the door to the lakeside, before returning his attention to Ironhide.

"I wouldn't want to trouble you, of course."

[not_toothfairy]

"Enh. This's a better use of my time anyway," says Ironhide. "We have a rule back home about me not being the first Autobot any of the humans meets. C'mon, I'll walk you through it."

He disassembles his sign, leaves the half-built logo in place, and gets up to head for the back door. That mech's shape looks weirdly familiar, for some reason, and he feels a bit of an obligation thereby.

[director_global]

"I appreciate it."

As he follows, moving faster than he was previously, his first step or two is awkwardly placed, but he gets the hang of it soon enough.

"Why the rule?"

[not_toothfairy]

"I don't get along with most of you squishies," says Ironhide. "Tend to leave a bad first impression. It's not a big problem with the soldiers, but civilians..." He snorts. (This is not as impressive for a being without lungs as you might think. It's actually a played-back recording of a noise Sergeant Epps made once.) "They want Optimus or Bumblebee to get in there first."

"Watch your balance gyros. Your feet don't distribute weight like a human foot does. That's gonna make a difference."

[director_global]

"Squishies, eh?" If anything, he appears to be amused by this.

"The -- aha." Stark adjusts his positioning and alignment, and his motion immediately becomes much smoother. "You're right, it certainly does."

[not_toothfairy]

"I'm not supposed to use anything but 'organics' or 'humans' when I'm on duty, but this is R&R territory."

"Yeah, like that. How's your center of gravity? Most humans don't have the hang of moving properly around their center."