(Untitled)

[angela_edmunds]

Angela has been sitting and waiting and staring at that damn door for three days. Just hoping. Just in case

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[agirllost]

Kim has been out of the bar long enough that she has no idea what's been happening.

Her chest aches just a little when she spots the young woman crying. She'd know her anywhere.

"Angie girl?" She's at her side in a matter of moments. "What happened?"

[angela_edmunds]

She goes to hug her hard, sobbing. "Oh, Mommy, I'm so glad you're here."

She can't mourn alone. Once, she'd have been okay with being alone, but not now.

[agirllost]

After a second of surprise, she hugs back, fighting the urge to ask questions.

If someone hurt her daughter she'll kill them.

"I'm here," she murmurs, holding her tightly. "It's okay."

[angela_edmunds]

"Melou is dead," she manages through tears. "He's gone."

I loved him so much and now he's gone. I don't know if I can deal with it.

[agirllost]

"Oh, God, Angie..." she gasps, stunned at the news.

Melou is dead? The annoying kid who pushed her buttons and yet was there for her daughter is gone.

Her hold loosens slightly from shock and then she pulls her closer.

"I'm so sorry," she whispers, unable to think of anything else to say. "I'm here. I'm here."

[angela_edmunds]

"I don't know what to do and I just feel like I'm gonna die." If it goes on much longer she will, she swears it.

"I want it to not have happened, I just wanna go to sleep and wake up and have it all be a dream."

She sounds weak and she hates it, but she just wants her mother, she just wants to not be strong.

[agirllost]

"I know, baby, I know," she says, running her hand over her hair.

So many times she wished for the same thing. Listening to the pain in her voice hurts.

She's not sure how to get her talking about it, having no idea where it happened or when. For all she knows, it happened weeks ago.

"I'm here, I'm not leaving..."

[angela_edmunds]

"Please, Mom, please stay with me. I don't want to be alone, I don't want to cry all by myself."

She's usually okay by herself, but not now. Now she just wanted to curl up in a ball of misery and sleep.

[agirllost]

"You don't have to ask," she says. "You're not alone." No one at home will understand why Angie's upset.

A few moments pass.

"Did it happen here?" she asks, softly.

[angela_edmunds]

She shook her head. "He was in...a war. And his side was losing. Every time he came in, he just looked...so tired and older, and older, and then he came in about three days ago...oh Mom," she puts her head down on the table and just sobs.

"I just wanted to help so bad and I couldn't, all I could do was keep him warm till he went back."

[agirllost]

She feels a tiny stab of guilt at having been gone so long.

"That helped him," she says. "You being here for him, that helped him. "

"I'm so sorry," she repeats.

[angela_edmunds]

"I should have asked him if he wanted to stay. I should have. But I couldn't. I couldn't because it would eat at him that he did."

She sobs again. "I had to let him go and I hate myself for it."

[agirllost]

"And he'd eventually have to go back, no matter how much he wished he could stay." she puts her hand on her shoulder.

She's so brave and strong for not asking. Kim knows she would have been unable to let go.

"No, don't hate yourself..."

[angela_edmunds]

"Why did I have to love him so much?"

It's barely a whisper; she didn't regret it so much as she regretted how much it hurt now.

[agirllost]

There's no answer to that kind of question.

She gathers her in her arms and holds her close. "He loved you too," she whispers. "People you love never really go away."

[angela_edmunds]

"No, he didn't," she whispered. She knew better.

But he did care. He cared about her a lot. So...

"...maybe he did."

Angela leans her head on her mother's arms. "I'm so tired," she sniffled.

So tired of hurting. It already felt like forever.