(Untitled)

[mend_and_defend]

Bob has been told, many many times, that while his guitar-playing skills are excellent, his singing ability is... significantly less so. Thus, although he still enjoys singing to himself, he avoids doing it in public.

But today, as he walks in the door, he hears music in the air, and he just can't help himself. He screeches out:

"I got my first

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[whatsshakinpox]

From another part of the room, one undertall alien menace heard this caterwauling and gritted his teeth, making a "Yeesh" kind of noise. Afterwhich, he calmly stepped over to the bar, silently jetpack-hops over into it to place a quiet over, and then appears once more to stand on top of the actual bar wearing own of those Doom Prophet signs that says "WE'RE DOOMED!" on one said, and "REPENT!" on the other. Time to boost the local moral...the Crypto way.

"Repent, for the end is nigh! Your souls and DNA are in peril at the coming of the black siren! Your only salvation is with the church of Aarkvoodle! Come forth, or perish in the wails of madness!"

Armageddon, thy name is...Bob?

[mend_and_defend]

Bob is cheerfully oblivious to the portentous qualities of his singing.

"Oh when I look back now
The summer seemed to last forever
And if I had the choice
Yeah, I'd always wanna be there
Those were the best days of my life..."

[whatsshakinpox]

"Beware! The summer will seem to last forever, but it won't! Because the senseless singing will not stop and all will be consumed in the black hole of stupidity!"

Now, it comes down to this. Which one of them is actually worse?

[mend_and_defend]

It just so happens that at that moment there's a break in the singing, and Bob becomes aware of the ranting alien on the bartop.

"...is there a problem?"

[whatsshakinpox]

"...and the fire from the bartop shall- Huh?"

Crypto looks around, momentarily 'confused', then...

"I'm cured! The ringing in the ears that I don't have is GONE! Praise Aarkvoodle!"

Yeah, he wasn't gonna fess up to jack squat.

[mend_and_defend]

"...are you making fun of me?"

[whatsshakinpox]

He looked astonished.

"Whaaat? Me? No way, man! I'd NEVER stoop so low as the demean the good name of such a practiced musician! Perish the thought!"

Pause. Crypto looked left and right for a couple seconds, then whispered...

"Between you, me, and the Bar, though...ya might wanna take a lesson or three."

[mend_and_defend]

"Not you too..." Bob rolls his eyes. "C'mon, my singing isn't that bad."

[whatsshakinpox]

Instead of answering, Crypto turns back towards the bar to continue yelling.

"Doom and gloom! An end to all things!"

Then, in mock-surprise, he points at the window.

"Hark! The end of the universe! We're finished!"

Yes, Bob, you are that bad.

[mend_and_defend]

Bob just shakes his head and walks away.

Stupid overcritical... alien... evangelist... thingies.