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[k_in_black]

"No report? Since when?"

"Well, don't contact me. Report it to Zed asap, and--. Ah, hell, I'm at Milliways, going offline. Upload your report once

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[gone_byebye]

There's a faint screaming noise coming from behind K; if he turns around he'll notice that Ray's approaching. He's not the one screaming, though he looks like he wants to. "Evening, K," he says. "Uh, could you watch my bag for me? I sort of absolutely have to get upstairs right now."

[k_in_black]

K accepts the bag. Of course he does. But he's holding it up and gazing at it warily.

"Anything I need to know here, Chief? This thing isn't going to wrap an appendage around my throat and try to lay an egg in me, is it?"

Hey, things happen on K's beat.

[gone_byebye]

"What? No. It's a burrito."

With that Ray heads upstairs at a run, taking the stairs two or three at a time.

[k_in_black]

K gives Ray a Look. Then sets in on the bar. "Ok, then," he says, with the air of a man who suspects he hasn't heard the most interesting part yet.

"Sure you don't any help up there?"

[gone_byebye]

"No! Vitally important goniochronicity issues!"

When Ray returns he's got a rectangular box made from Magnetix red, blue, yellow, green, gold, silver, and translucent rods, and a lot of little silver balls, and a bunch of panels and vanes pointing at angles that-

Oh. Oh, man, some of those angles do not belong in human lanes of perception. And some of the pieces aren't even entirely there.

"I gotta get this finished right now or the Doctor's going to kick me in the tuchus so hard there won't be enough of me left for Romana to smack around for failure to observe proper observation protocols- here, if you could throw me a couple of blues and reds-" He slides the clamshell case with said pieces in it down the bar at K. It hits the bag; the screaming changes tenor, but does not actually stop.

[k_in_black]

K glares at the panels and vanes, then squints and shakes his head.

"I'm going to have a headache for a week," he mutters. "No worries, Chief. We're on it." K rummages through the case and starts handing over the appropriate rods.

"Make sure you keep those silvers apart from the yellows. I don't know what phase shifting a part of Bar would cost, but I have a feeling the Landlord would make sure you paid it."

[gone_byebye]

"Yeah, you are, which is why-" Ray snaps the first piece in. It's blue. "-as soon as I'm done with-" A red one this time. "-the main superstructure, I'm putting-" Two more reds. "-walls on it. For everyone's safety. Including my own."

[k_in_black]

K passes over a green, then offers a gold, but gives Ray another blue when he asks for it instead.

Well, it's been a while since K last had a briefing about goniochronicity.

"Why isn't the Doctor making this himself anyway?"

[gone_byebye]

"Because that," Ray says, waving the blue in K's direction before snapping it into place, "would be cheating. This isn't his, K. This is mine. Earth gets it by Earth tech using Earth tools in Earth's own time, or Earth gets it not at all."

He seems to think this makes sense.

[k_in_black]

"So you're saying, we finish this, and Earth shows up the Time Lords? Sign me up, kid. Half the time a TARDIS passes through MiB-monitored space, we get a full system crash. About time the hairless apes put one over on Gallifrey."

K pockets the MiBlackberry. It's no time for alien tech. This just got personal.

[gone_byebye]

"Romana says if I get this finished and developed on my own she'll teach me enough Old Gallifreyan to read their original notes and papers on the subject, since I already worked it out on my own," Ray says happily. "Right now we're still just at the bigger-in-than-out stage of development but she says I hit on goniochronicity in almost exactly the same way that the early Gallifreyan temporal theorists did when they were just starting to work with the fourth dimension. Okay, now the gold, and two silvers, and one of those green panels on the left?"

[k_in_black]

"What MiB wouldn't give for a week's access to those records," K replies, as he hunts for the correct rods. Gold, silver, silver.

"Green one goes here? Or here?"

[gone_byebye]

"Here," Ray says, indicating the spot. "And now if you could pull your hands back I've got the final piece to put in and I don't want any extra variables in the equation-"

[k_in_black]

K takes several steps back, but not before grabbing his glass. He's not about to take any risks with bourbon that good.

And while he's at it, on go the shades.

"Ready when you are, Ray."

[gone_byebye]

Ray nods, glances at his watch, and snaps the last piece into place.

Nothing very spectacular happens.

"Bar," Ray says. "I need five pieces of plastic paneling with metal elements capable of being held in place by the magnetics already in the superstructure, and then I need... oh... a fifty pound bag of kitty litter."

Both orders are filled. The bag is about five times larger than the box's own dimensions, which becomes more evident as Ray snaps the sides and bottom into place.

Funny, then, that once he heaves the kitty litter up onto his shoulder and starts pouring, it shows no sign of overflowing the box.

[k_in_black]

K can't help himself. Curious, he moves back over to Ray and looks over the man's shoulder as he keeps pouring kitty litter.

And pouring.

And pouring.

"Tell me you have the full specs on this," K asks, somehow managing not to beg. "If this thing works, Zed might end up giving you a spare neuralyzer himself."

Well, no, but Ray probably has the right idea.