(Untitled)

[action_antihero]

[OOM: Same lake, same tree, same man, one year later.]

Jack's sitting out by the lake, enjoying the quiet and the scenery, but not averse to company.

Comments

[audieraines]

"Hey, you're back," Audrey tries to say casually.

[action_antihero]

Jack looks up, giving Audrey a slightly awkward smile as he sees her. "Hey, Audrey. Yeah, the recon mission didn't take long; I've been going in and out quite a bit since then."

[audieraines]

"It went okay?" She glances at him, looking for new bruises.

[action_antihero]

"It went fine," he says, reassuringly, though his smile is a little exasperated. "No problems, no fights, just in, found the right ship, got the confirmation Mal needed, then out again. What have you been up to?"

[audieraines]

"I'm glad to hear that, did you get to see much of space?" She has to smile at the absurdity of the question, even though it's a logical one.

"Thinking," she admits. "I've been...I have to...I can't love someone I'm never going to see again."

[action_antihero]

His smiles broadens just a little more. "Yeah, some of it, from a shuttle not much bigger than a largish RV."

It fades as she continues, though. He's silent for a moment before he asks, softly, "Physically can't or more that you shouldn't?"

[audieraines]

She nods, "It must have been exciting." And she wants to take back whatever she said after that, because it's not his problem, except that he shares a name and a past with a man she can't stop loving no matter how hard she tries.

"Does it matter which one?"

[action_antihero]

"Not really, I guess. I'm not really sure which is better." Particularly as he's not capable of either...

[audieraines]

"Can't, probably, because then there's nothing to think about - shouldn't means it's not your choice. Either way, it's over." She sits near him, looking out over the water and thinking about how it reminds her of the lake near her family's old summer home.

[action_antihero]

"Yeah, but...I'm not so sure it'd be a good thing to just be able to turn it off like that, even when you probably shouldn't still love someone. It'd be kind of worrying." It would, however, save a lot of pain.

[audieraines]

That's your gift

She remembers a conversation, telling her Jack that turning off emotions to deal with a crisis, that was his ability, not hers.

But, this isn't her Jack, and she has to believe that hers loved her. God knows she shouldn't love him, part of her is even horrified at the depth of her feelings, but she can only change them slowly. If at all.

Maybe this Jack, he can't block out how he feels.

"I saw a movie about that a few years ago, making yourself forget everything about a person to get over them...I wonder if it would work."

[action_antihero]

He shakes his head. "I wouldn't want to," he says, without even pausing to think about it. "I'd never want to forget."

[audieraines]

"I would," she says softly.

Her next words are almost breathed, "I sometimes wonder if the man I loved really existed at all."

[action_antihero]

"What do you mean?" he asks. Even though she's not his Audrey, and he doesn't feel the same way about his Audrey that he once did, that comment still hurts, just a little.

[audieraines]

"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have said that," she looks up at him. "But, you of all people know what I mean," she looks away, back out at the lake. "It's my fault for not wanting to see his other side."

[action_antihero]

He rubs the back of his next for a moment, quietly replying, "Maybe he was just scared of what would happen if you did. Maybe he didn't want to be that person anymore, wanted to forget it."