(no subject)
So she's drinking again. As I should have expected.
Of course she wouldn't sober up for her own daughter's bridal shower. Of course she wouldn't be there for her, like she's supposed to be.
No, she can't do that.
So I can't do anything for her anymore.
It's so upsetting to me, even though it shouldn't be. I should have known this was going to happen. I should have prepared myself more for this possibility. But I just didn't think she would actually do it.
All I want to do right now is cry. I'm just so exhausted. I'm so fed up and so frustrated.
She has hurt me so many times throughout my life. This time shouldn't be any different, but it is. This is my wedding. This is something she is supposed to want to be by my side during. But she only cares about making everyone else around her just as miserable as she is.
Well, good job, you've succeeded. But it's not going to last, because I absolutely refuse to let you ruin this for me.
I already have so many other things going on right now. I don't need this. I don't need any of it.
I just want to bury myself under the covers and wake up 40 days from now. I want to wake up in Vegas, warm and relaxed, next to my husband. And I want to come home to a house that belongs to just he and I, with a puppy waiting there. I don't want to deal with his mom or my mom, or his brother, or the wedding, or his aunt, or any of it. I just want it all to disappear.
If only.
Of course she wouldn't sober up for her own daughter's bridal shower. Of course she wouldn't be there for her, like she's supposed to be.
No, she can't do that.
So I can't do anything for her anymore.
It's so upsetting to me, even though it shouldn't be. I should have known this was going to happen. I should have prepared myself more for this possibility. But I just didn't think she would actually do it.
All I want to do right now is cry. I'm just so exhausted. I'm so fed up and so frustrated.
She has hurt me so many times throughout my life. This time shouldn't be any different, but it is. This is my wedding. This is something she is supposed to want to be by my side during. But she only cares about making everyone else around her just as miserable as she is.
Well, good job, you've succeeded. But it's not going to last, because I absolutely refuse to let you ruin this for me.
I already have so many other things going on right now. I don't need this. I don't need any of it.
I just want to bury myself under the covers and wake up 40 days from now. I want to wake up in Vegas, warm and relaxed, next to my husband. And I want to come home to a house that belongs to just he and I, with a puppy waiting there. I don't want to deal with his mom or my mom, or his brother, or the wedding, or his aunt, or any of it. I just want it all to disappear.
If only.