No wonder the Soviets lost: Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull
This is what I deem spoiler free if you're bothered about the plot.
I totally didn't see this one coming. When you go to an Indiana Jones movie, you expect a certain amount of unbelievability - alright, I can take it that the Ark of the Covenant possesses supernatural powers that can melt one's face off, but what I can't take are just downright impossible scenarios grounded in real, supposedly credible events. So, forgive me for loosing faith in the movie the moment Dr Jones survives a nuclear explosion by climbing into a lead lined fridge. Furthermore, forgive me for laughing when, after being shot about a mile up into the air, and coming to a less than smooth landing fraught with bumps and jumps, Dr Jones tumbles out of the Fridge seemingly unharmed. The only way this could have been any more absurd is if Dr Jones had emerged from the fridge with a cane and striped hat, and proceeded to dance and sing.
"What am I wanted for other than surviving a nuclear bomb?" Being the messiah? indeed.
Problem was, it wasn't just the fact it was an impossible feat, it was also that the audience lost all fear of loosing Dr Jones, and as such, lost all emotion to go with the adventure; there was no danger. The man was clearly immortal, despite the fact his age is constantly rubbed over our face like a damp soggy towel. So why should I care that he's faced with a perilous drop? That's peanuts compared to a nuke. Peanuts.
Speaking of peanuts, the damn animal imagery in this film was sheer animal loving debauchery. At one point, a character by the name of Mutt (No, it doesn't make sense in the film either) is stopped during a car chase (in which he's fighting the bad russian on top of two cars, another inpossible feat we'll come back to later) by a vine, which is consequently hoisted up. There, he is taught by a plethora of monkeys to use the vines to swing through the jungle, and miraculously manages to catch up with the 50MPH cars. That's not the worst bit though, ohhhhh no, the monkeys who were swinging with him seem to instinctively know who the bad guys are, and they join in the fight, trying to sabotage the car and pull at her hair! Damn, those monkeys are intelligent.
I thought I was in the wrong cinema screen; this was clearly a Disney movie.
I can't even touch on the dissapointment of the main plot, due to the need not to spoil, but it was the obvious awnser to the story team. They probably thought this one up in the morning and left for home at lunchtime, with a big fat paycheck in their pocket. Job's a good'n. Well done team!
But KotCS wasn't without it's merits. It was solidly acted, for one, Harrison ford again taking the reins of the titular character, and doing another reliable play on the now older character. But characters weren't developed, or rather, in one instance, the character was, but it didn't seem fitting, there was no subtle change. From fiesty and sarcastic to a sickly smile and happy attitude. They all seemed rather two dimensional, which probably goes some way to explain why the acting went a long way.
In conclusion however, while Indiana Jones and the Crystal skull has it's bad points, it's an adventure movie first and foremost, and that's what the movie provides. It could have been more refined, it could have been more believable, but it's still an enjoyable cinema romp.
2/5 stars.
I totally didn't see this one coming. When you go to an Indiana Jones movie, you expect a certain amount of unbelievability - alright, I can take it that the Ark of the Covenant possesses supernatural powers that can melt one's face off, but what I can't take are just downright impossible scenarios grounded in real, supposedly credible events. So, forgive me for loosing faith in the movie the moment Dr Jones survives a nuclear explosion by climbing into a lead lined fridge. Furthermore, forgive me for laughing when, after being shot about a mile up into the air, and coming to a less than smooth landing fraught with bumps and jumps, Dr Jones tumbles out of the Fridge seemingly unharmed. The only way this could have been any more absurd is if Dr Jones had emerged from the fridge with a cane and striped hat, and proceeded to dance and sing.
"What am I wanted for other than surviving a nuclear bomb?" Being the messiah? indeed.
Problem was, it wasn't just the fact it was an impossible feat, it was also that the audience lost all fear of loosing Dr Jones, and as such, lost all emotion to go with the adventure; there was no danger. The man was clearly immortal, despite the fact his age is constantly rubbed over our face like a damp soggy towel. So why should I care that he's faced with a perilous drop? That's peanuts compared to a nuke. Peanuts.
Speaking of peanuts, the damn animal imagery in this film was sheer animal loving debauchery. At one point, a character by the name of Mutt (No, it doesn't make sense in the film either) is stopped during a car chase (in which he's fighting the bad russian on top of two cars, another inpossible feat we'll come back to later) by a vine, which is consequently hoisted up. There, he is taught by a plethora of monkeys to use the vines to swing through the jungle, and miraculously manages to catch up with the 50MPH cars. That's not the worst bit though, ohhhhh no, the monkeys who were swinging with him seem to instinctively know who the bad guys are, and they join in the fight, trying to sabotage the car and pull at her hair! Damn, those monkeys are intelligent.
I thought I was in the wrong cinema screen; this was clearly a Disney movie.
I can't even touch on the dissapointment of the main plot, due to the need not to spoil, but it was the obvious awnser to the story team. They probably thought this one up in the morning and left for home at lunchtime, with a big fat paycheck in their pocket. Job's a good'n. Well done team!
But KotCS wasn't without it's merits. It was solidly acted, for one, Harrison ford again taking the reins of the titular character, and doing another reliable play on the now older character. But characters weren't developed, or rather, in one instance, the character was, but it didn't seem fitting, there was no subtle change. From fiesty and sarcastic to a sickly smile and happy attitude. They all seemed rather two dimensional, which probably goes some way to explain why the acting went a long way.
In conclusion however, while Indiana Jones and the Crystal skull has it's bad points, it's an adventure movie first and foremost, and that's what the movie provides. It could have been more refined, it could have been more believable, but it's still an enjoyable cinema romp.
2/5 stars.