My God It's been Months!!!
Ok, so I got really board today, and I though, might as well see if livejournal is still up, so I did, do you realize I haven't updated this since Aug? How sad is that? Anywhy this is what has happened in my life since then:
I'm still doing Belly Dancing, and it's going really, really well, I might actually be proforming in a fundraiser this Feb! Jazz and Tap are also going well, same old, same old there.
In Oct. I was intived to travel to Japan with People to People, I'm really, very excited!!! Actually, the first delegation meeting is this Sunday (Dec. 4th for those who care)!!!!!!!.
Lets see, what else? I did the play Beauty and the Beast! It's quite amazing actually, we werer one of the first amitur groups ever allowed to go the play!!! Oh, I was on of the Napkins (which are the lead dancers, yay!!!) Here's the lead cast list:
Belle
Jordan G.
Beast
Tristan R.
Gaston
Tyler M.
Maurice
Thomas S.
Cogsworth
Matt
Mrs. Potts
Mariah M.
Lumiere
Brit A.
Spencer B.
Chip
Andrew W.
Babette
Heather C.
Madame de laGrande Bouche
Jeanette N.
Le Fou
Dominic
D’Arque
Carly A.
Silly Girls -
Jordan S.
Colleen S.
Katey C.
Yaya, it was a really great show! OMG, I just loved watching Brit and Heather playing Bab and Lumi, it was jus the funnyest thing!!!! Lets see, what happened during the show...Brit now had a girlfriend, Amanda *sigh* I should probably explain this little bit, because this was a very important chapter of my life:
So when the show started, me, Brit, and Heather were really tight friends, we hung out constantly, which totally rocked. But since Brit scored a lead roll, he also gained fan girls, this time being three: Amanda, Pez, and...I can't remember the other one. At first he found them to be really annoying, and you know Brit, he's way to nice to say anything, but still, you could see that a bit of him enjoyed it all the same, cuz, like he says he's still "a highschool guy". *cough, cough* Anywhy, the more they hung on him, the less time the three of us hung out, we always kept an eye on him through. But by the time our cast photo came around, Amanda was really starting to get on my nerves, she was forever handing on him, and flirting with him. I finally, in a moment incanity, wrote him a note, asking him how he felt about me, heehee, actually the "note" as a two page thing talking about everything from our meeting to our friendship, but it in it, I said I wouldn't bring it up again until he did. Well, I didn't mention it forever, and I guessed that the answer was, but I still hoped against it. Finally, two weeks later, during the shows, so I'm guessing early Nov., I hear that Amanda and Brit were going out, and it stung a little, because he was saying at lunch just the day before, that he found her anoying, this gave me hope. Anywhy, this was during the first show of the day, and I actually asked Amanda herself, as we were somewhat friends, really she is a very nice girl, and she said, beaming that it was true. I took it very well, thankfully I poured all my emotions into my dancing, so I burned almost all of it off right away!!! Then during the Mob song that day, Amanda, along with the rest of the cast was on stage. We met in our usual place, by the prop table, and I gave him an overly cherful smile, and told him "congrats on Amanda, I'm really happy you found someone," I glanced up into his eyes for a moment and saw friendly consern, after that I turned around, and headed outside to get a drink. I didn't see him again until the next show. He cought my sitting, waiting for my que, and told me he wanted to talk to me during the mob song,(which was actually like a 20 min. windown inbetween our scenes) I smiled, nodding, and he left because Amanda came over to him. When the time came, he was waiting in the usual spot, and he lead me into the hallway corner, this whole time being uncharacteristicly serious. Right as he tried to start talking to me, Asher came over and we tryed to excuse ourselves outside, saying we needed a drink, but Asher tryed to follow us and and Brit said something to get him to leave, I'm still not sure what, but I filled myself a cup and asked if he wanted one, in my smilely over cherful way. He knows me far to well to know that this was just a mask, fortunately, no one else seem to though, anywhy, it seemed as through he had an almost painful look on his face. I set my water down and he walk infront of me, we were thankfully alone right now. He looked down at me, I saw a look of serious concern on his face, and asked, "kyra, are you sure your ok with all this?" I tried to give a smile, my eyes were overbright, and I replied weakly, "of course" I look up into his face, and now see pain mixed in his now overlybright eyes, my lip began to quiver and I looked up at the moon, I could feel that my eyes were about to spill, but I looked back at him as he spoke again, "are you sure your ok? I just don't want this to ruin our friendship, it's really important to me." I gave a nod and tears started to slowly fall from my eyes. Seeing this, he did something I never through he would do, he took me into a small hug, we stayed there for a moment, tears continued to trickle down my cheek, I then pushes away slightly, saying that I would ruin his costume. He gave I grim nod, and I turned away still trying to compose myself, I'm not sure how long he stood there, but the next thing I knew, Heather was out here concerned. I figured that she just came out to get at drink of water, but I later found out, that Brit asked her to check on me, becasue "I wasn't doing very well." She helped me calm down, as I muttered to myself about how stupid I was and how I just brought it on myself, she didn't understand what was going on, be she conforted me all the same. I finally did calm down enough to go sing for the mob song, and once me and Heather got to the wings, Brit flashed me a worried look, which I returned with a small smile. I made it through the battle alright, but when I waited in the wings for the last seen I had to fight back tears when Brit was on stage, and then again during bows on his turn. That night I skipped the meet and greet, not trusting myself about him. I calmed down quickly putting away my costume and unding my wig, I was back to my old self, still a little overly chery though. Me and Heather decided that we would like some ice cream, and on the way back from the lobby to ask my mum, she probed me slightly into about what happened, she thought it was actually just a mentel breckdown, I asked if she could give me a little more time, that the wound was still to fresh for salt, she simply nodded and left it there. We ended up inviting Brit, Heather again didn't know what was going on between us at the moment, and he seemed a little surprised that I invited him, but agreed anyway. On the way to the car, I told heather I would tell her what happened if she wanted, and she suddenly looked like she was dieing to ask all evening. I went over it very basically, since she didn't know till just then that I had any fillings, aside from friendship for Brit. I explained that I had asked him what he thought of me, and how he turned my down after he anouced he had a girlfriend. She seemed really shocked by all of this, and kept saying that Brit dumped me, and it was painful to say that he never when out with me in the first place. We then when over to the ice cream parlor (now what I look back on it, it was probably a very, very good thing that Brit came, and that heather was there, so that we all kept a casual and relaxed front. Lol, now that I think about it, it's kinda funny, because we're all sitting there, two of which, just had an emotional scene less then an hour ago. And we were all determind to make it a regular evening! This is what it was, I was trying to keep in normal, while fighting back tears half the time, heather trying to pretend she doesn't know any of this, trying to keep an eye on me, and still trying to comprehent Brit. And Brit tryin to hide anything from Heather, not knowing she already knows.) The ice cream parlor was actually quite fun, beside when Heather started the subject of dating and boy/girlfriends, she was saying that she was fine with out one, and then looks over and me and says, "though I'm not sure about you." Brit looks over at me a little worried that I might break down or something like that, but I just shrugged and said "I'm good." Brit seemed to be releived because he when be to his regular mood, as did the conversation. That night however, for the first time, I cried myself to sleep over a boy.
After that even, we all thankfully stayed friends, I don't hate, or resent Amanda for being his first girlfriends, and I still talk to her often, though I do avoid both of them when they're around eachother, because even though the whole event allowed me to grow, the wound is still fresh enough that when I see them snuggle and kiss, it cuts like a knive. I noticed however that whenever Brit isn't round, Amanda has been hanging on Dom, and I've checked with other people, to make sure I'm not being paranoied, and they all agreed. So now I'm not sure what to do. Do I tell something to Brit, and let him think I'm just being jelious and trying to break the two up, or stay quite, and let Amanda break his heart, either way, someone's going to get hurt. So for now, all I can do is be a good friend, and stand by his side and confort him when the break-up finally happens.
*sigh* Well, I just relived a painful memory to document it, and I'm now both physically, and mentally tired. I will try to update more often now, night.
I'm still doing Belly Dancing, and it's going really, really well, I might actually be proforming in a fundraiser this Feb! Jazz and Tap are also going well, same old, same old there.
In Oct. I was intived to travel to Japan with People to People, I'm really, very excited!!! Actually, the first delegation meeting is this Sunday (Dec. 4th for those who care)!!!!!!!.
Lets see, what else? I did the play Beauty and the Beast! It's quite amazing actually, we werer one of the first amitur groups ever allowed to go the play!!! Oh, I was on of the Napkins (which are the lead dancers, yay!!!) Here's the lead cast list:
Belle
Jordan G.
Beast
Tristan R.
Gaston
Tyler M.
Maurice
Thomas S.
Cogsworth
Matt
Mrs. Potts
Mariah M.
Lumiere
Brit A.
Spencer B.
Chip
Andrew W.
Babette
Heather C.
Madame de laGrande Bouche
Jeanette N.
Le Fou
Dominic
D’Arque
Carly A.
Silly Girls -
Jordan S.
Colleen S.
Katey C.
Yaya, it was a really great show! OMG, I just loved watching Brit and Heather playing Bab and Lumi, it was jus the funnyest thing!!!! Lets see, what happened during the show...Brit now had a girlfriend, Amanda *sigh* I should probably explain this little bit, because this was a very important chapter of my life:
So when the show started, me, Brit, and Heather were really tight friends, we hung out constantly, which totally rocked. But since Brit scored a lead roll, he also gained fan girls, this time being three: Amanda, Pez, and...I can't remember the other one. At first he found them to be really annoying, and you know Brit, he's way to nice to say anything, but still, you could see that a bit of him enjoyed it all the same, cuz, like he says he's still "a highschool guy". *cough, cough* Anywhy, the more they hung on him, the less time the three of us hung out, we always kept an eye on him through. But by the time our cast photo came around, Amanda was really starting to get on my nerves, she was forever handing on him, and flirting with him. I finally, in a moment incanity, wrote him a note, asking him how he felt about me, heehee, actually the "note" as a two page thing talking about everything from our meeting to our friendship, but it in it, I said I wouldn't bring it up again until he did. Well, I didn't mention it forever, and I guessed that the answer was, but I still hoped against it. Finally, two weeks later, during the shows, so I'm guessing early Nov., I hear that Amanda and Brit were going out, and it stung a little, because he was saying at lunch just the day before, that he found her anoying, this gave me hope. Anywhy, this was during the first show of the day, and I actually asked Amanda herself, as we were somewhat friends, really she is a very nice girl, and she said, beaming that it was true. I took it very well, thankfully I poured all my emotions into my dancing, so I burned almost all of it off right away!!! Then during the Mob song that day, Amanda, along with the rest of the cast was on stage. We met in our usual place, by the prop table, and I gave him an overly cherful smile, and told him "congrats on Amanda, I'm really happy you found someone," I glanced up into his eyes for a moment and saw friendly consern, after that I turned around, and headed outside to get a drink. I didn't see him again until the next show. He cought my sitting, waiting for my que, and told me he wanted to talk to me during the mob song,(which was actually like a 20 min. windown inbetween our scenes) I smiled, nodding, and he left because Amanda came over to him. When the time came, he was waiting in the usual spot, and he lead me into the hallway corner, this whole time being uncharacteristicly serious. Right as he tried to start talking to me, Asher came over and we tryed to excuse ourselves outside, saying we needed a drink, but Asher tryed to follow us and and Brit said something to get him to leave, I'm still not sure what, but I filled myself a cup and asked if he wanted one, in my smilely over cherful way. He knows me far to well to know that this was just a mask, fortunately, no one else seem to though, anywhy, it seemed as through he had an almost painful look on his face. I set my water down and he walk infront of me, we were thankfully alone right now. He looked down at me, I saw a look of serious concern on his face, and asked, "kyra, are you sure your ok with all this?" I tried to give a smile, my eyes were overbright, and I replied weakly, "of course" I look up into his face, and now see pain mixed in his now overlybright eyes, my lip began to quiver and I looked up at the moon, I could feel that my eyes were about to spill, but I looked back at him as he spoke again, "are you sure your ok? I just don't want this to ruin our friendship, it's really important to me." I gave a nod and tears started to slowly fall from my eyes. Seeing this, he did something I never through he would do, he took me into a small hug, we stayed there for a moment, tears continued to trickle down my cheek, I then pushes away slightly, saying that I would ruin his costume. He gave I grim nod, and I turned away still trying to compose myself, I'm not sure how long he stood there, but the next thing I knew, Heather was out here concerned. I figured that she just came out to get at drink of water, but I later found out, that Brit asked her to check on me, becasue "I wasn't doing very well." She helped me calm down, as I muttered to myself about how stupid I was and how I just brought it on myself, she didn't understand what was going on, be she conforted me all the same. I finally did calm down enough to go sing for the mob song, and once me and Heather got to the wings, Brit flashed me a worried look, which I returned with a small smile. I made it through the battle alright, but when I waited in the wings for the last seen I had to fight back tears when Brit was on stage, and then again during bows on his turn. That night I skipped the meet and greet, not trusting myself about him. I calmed down quickly putting away my costume and unding my wig, I was back to my old self, still a little overly chery though. Me and Heather decided that we would like some ice cream, and on the way back from the lobby to ask my mum, she probed me slightly into about what happened, she thought it was actually just a mentel breckdown, I asked if she could give me a little more time, that the wound was still to fresh for salt, she simply nodded and left it there. We ended up inviting Brit, Heather again didn't know what was going on between us at the moment, and he seemed a little surprised that I invited him, but agreed anyway. On the way to the car, I told heather I would tell her what happened if she wanted, and she suddenly looked like she was dieing to ask all evening. I went over it very basically, since she didn't know till just then that I had any fillings, aside from friendship for Brit. I explained that I had asked him what he thought of me, and how he turned my down after he anouced he had a girlfriend. She seemed really shocked by all of this, and kept saying that Brit dumped me, and it was painful to say that he never when out with me in the first place. We then when over to the ice cream parlor (now what I look back on it, it was probably a very, very good thing that Brit came, and that heather was there, so that we all kept a casual and relaxed front. Lol, now that I think about it, it's kinda funny, because we're all sitting there, two of which, just had an emotional scene less then an hour ago. And we were all determind to make it a regular evening! This is what it was, I was trying to keep in normal, while fighting back tears half the time, heather trying to pretend she doesn't know any of this, trying to keep an eye on me, and still trying to comprehent Brit. And Brit tryin to hide anything from Heather, not knowing she already knows.) The ice cream parlor was actually quite fun, beside when Heather started the subject of dating and boy/girlfriends, she was saying that she was fine with out one, and then looks over and me and says, "though I'm not sure about you." Brit looks over at me a little worried that I might break down or something like that, but I just shrugged and said "I'm good." Brit seemed to be releived because he when be to his regular mood, as did the conversation. That night however, for the first time, I cried myself to sleep over a boy.
After that even, we all thankfully stayed friends, I don't hate, or resent Amanda for being his first girlfriends, and I still talk to her often, though I do avoid both of them when they're around eachother, because even though the whole event allowed me to grow, the wound is still fresh enough that when I see them snuggle and kiss, it cuts like a knive. I noticed however that whenever Brit isn't round, Amanda has been hanging on Dom, and I've checked with other people, to make sure I'm not being paranoied, and they all agreed. So now I'm not sure what to do. Do I tell something to Brit, and let him think I'm just being jelious and trying to break the two up, or stay quite, and let Amanda break his heart, either way, someone's going to get hurt. So for now, all I can do is be a good friend, and stand by his side and confort him when the break-up finally happens.
*sigh* Well, I just relived a painful memory to document it, and I'm now both physically, and mentally tired. I will try to update more often now, night.