[Fic] Jealousy - PoT, ShishiTori, 16/?
Title: Jealousy
Series: Prince of Tennis
Pairing: ShishiTori, Tori/?
Rating: NC-17
Word Count: chapter = 5717 fic so far = 66,548
Summary: Sometimes you don't appreciate the value of what you've got, until you don't have it any more.
This chapter is not work safe!
When the doorbell rang Ohtori was pacing back and forth in the front hall, trying to tell himself he wasn't nervous about what he was planning. There was nothing to be nervous about, or so he kept repeating until the words had nearly become a mantra. His stomach didn't seem to be quite convinced, though, nor did his sweating palms.
Even though he was expecting it, the sound of the bell startled him so badly he actually jumped. Taking a deep breath, he wiped his hands on his jeans and went to answer it. This was stupid, he was going to ruin everything.
"Hey," he greeted Amano as the door opened. His boyfriend was dressed in pressed slacks and a polo shirt; for Amano that was casual. Ohtori had to smile as he saw it, and the simple familiarity of it calmed him somewhat.
"Hey," Amano replied, stepping inside and setting his duffle bag down while he kicked off his shoes. The smaller boy was wearing his hair up again, and Ohtori watched the way the long dark strands of the ponytail slid over his shoulders as he moved. "So what's the deal with this weekend?" the pianist wanted to know, straightening and picking up his bag again. "We don't usually bother with inviting each other, we just crash wherever we are."
"Yeah, but I wanted to make sure it was my place we crashed at," Ohtori explained, grinning at him and leading the way deeper into the house. When Amano looked at him curiously, he elaborated, "My family is gone for the weekend. It's my grandmother's birthday, they took her up to a hot spring to celebrate."
From nowhere his cat Karasu appeared, running straight to Amano and twining around his ankles. Ohtori had to stifle a snicker at the long-suffering look on his boyfriend's face. It wasn't that Amano disliked cats or anything; he was just allergic to them and so tried to stay away from them, but Karasu seemed to insist on being near him any time he came over. The funniest part was that Shishido loved cats, and Karasu wouldn't have anything to do with him. Ohtori had long suspected the feline of possessing a rather large sadistic streak.
"So nobody is going to be here but us all weekend?" Amano asked to be sure, his expression slowly turning from thoughtful to wicked. "That could be... fun." Ohtori shivered at the heated look in the other boy's eyes. "How did you convince them to leave you behind?"
"I told them I have a game tomorrow," Ohtori replied, laughing. "They already know better than to try to get me to go anywhere if I've got a match scheduled." He opened the door to his room, let Amano follow him through and then nudged the cat back outside with his foot before closing the door. Having the pianist sniffling and sneezing all weekend would not be conducive to his plans.
When he looked up again, Amano had turned away from him to set his bag beside the bed. There was a tension to the other boy's shoulders that hadn't been there a minute ago. "So what time do you have to meet Shishido tomorrow, then? I guess I probably shouldn't wear you out too much..."
It was obvious the pianist was trying to keep the resentment out of his tone, but he wasn't succeeding very well. Sighing, Ohtori moved to wrap his arms around the smaller boy from behind, pulling him into an embrace. Amano resisted, staying stiff in his arms rather than leaning back against him.
"Kazuya, I know I've been neglecting you lately," Ohtori said softly, nuzzling into the soft strands of the pianist's hair. "I'm sorry, I really am. That tournament was brutal; I don't ever want to play matches on so many consecutive days again."
Between the extra training they'd put into the weeks before the tournament and how tired he'd been afterwards, Ohtori had barely seen or even spoken to his boyfriend for the entire spring break. In the end he and Shishido had eventually been eliminated in the quarterfinals, by the pair who would eventually go on to win the tournament. It was a result they were both happy with, especially considering the level they'd been playing at.
And it had gotten them a lot of attention from the tennis world in Tokyo. They'd been featured in a couple of articles and given several interviews, and if they played as well in the next tournament they might even end up being seeded after that.
It all took up a lot of time, though, and Ohtori really did feel bad about how little energy he'd had left over for Amano. He intended to make up for that this weekend, at least a little.
His words didn't seem to appease his boyfriend though, for the shorter boy remained tense in his embrace. "You say that now, but you're already starting a new tournament, aren't you? I never get to see you anymore, Choutarou! We don't have music and you're always training after school. People have been asking me if we broke up because they never see us together any more. We're not even in the same class now!"
Sighing, Ohtori held him a little tighter. Despite Shishido helping him to study he hadn't done as well on the exams as he'd have liked, and he'd placed in the 3-2 class while Amano remained in 3-1. It had disappointed his parents as well, but there wasn't anything he could do about it now. Unfortunately it did mean that he never saw Amano anymore unless they made a real effort to get together outside of school, and this was the first weekend since the new year started that he'd had a chance.
"Kazuya, I invited you over so we could spend some time together," Ohtori said wearily. "Are we going to waste all of it arguing about how we never spend time together any more?"
"I just..." Amano's voice broke, and Ohtori winced. He really needed to learn to manage his time better. He hadn't meant to hurt the other boy so badly. "I just feel like you're slipping away from me. We used to spend so much time together, and now I can't even have you for a whole weekend any more!"
With an effort Ohtori took the shorter boy by the shoulders and turned him around so they could look at each other. Amano resisted, but Ohtori was more than strong enough to just pick him up and move him if he had to, though thankfully it didn't come to that. Miserable silver eyes stared up at him, suspiciously shiny as if Amano was holding back tears with an effort of will.
"You do have me for the whole weekend," Ohtori told him softly. "I don't have a game with Shishido-san tomorrow, Kazuya, I just told my parents that so I wouldn't have to go with them. I'm not even training with him at all this weekend; I told him and Atobe that I needed a break before I started to forget what you look like."
Firmly he told his nerves to go to hell; there was nothing else he could think of that would both reassure and make it up to Amano half as well. Not to mention hopefully easing some of the guilt he'd been feeling about the fact that he couldn't stop being attracted to his partner. He was ready for this, he was.
Astonishment spread over Amano's expression and Ohtori smiled down at him, lifting his chin with gentle fingers so he could lean down and kiss him briefly. "I'm all yours, Kazuya. My parents probably won't be home until after dinner tomorrow. Two whole days where I don't intend to think about anybody but you and me."
"Choutarou..." Amano shook his head as if to clear it of a daze, then pushed up to meet his lips again in a more passionate kiss. "I'm sorry," he said when they pulled apart again, breathing a little harder. "Here I've been bitching at you when you'd done something so nice - I don't know how you put up with me sometimes."
"Because I care about you," Ohtori said firmly. Biting his lip, he steeled himself and then added softly, "Because I love you, Kazuya." It felt odd to say it after all this time, but he was being so silly about it and it was past time for him to stop. If what he felt for Amano wasn't the kind of all-encompassing adoration he'd had for Shishido last year, that didn't mean it wasn't love. What he'd felt for Shishido had been infatuation, and that wasn't really love either.
"You..." Clearly delighted, Amano threw his arms around the taller boy's shoulders and kissed him again, hard. "You said it! You really said it!" Once again Ohtori felt guilty; Amano had always assured him that he understood Ohtori's reluctance to commit himself verbally like that, but it was obvious it had been bothering the pianist more than he let on. Ohtori had always believed that actions meant more than words, since it was much more difficult to lie with your actions, but it seemed the words meant more to Amano than he'd realized.
Maybe, now that he'd finally heard them, he would feel a bit less insecure about Shishido. Leaning down Ohtori kissed him again, drawing it out and teasing with his tongue a bit this time. He'd discovered, much to his pleasure, that he really enjoyed kissing and as a result he'd gotten very good at it. Sometimes he thought it felt more intimate than anything else they'd yet done, because it created a visceral connection between them, a give and take that was more immediate than simple touch could reproduce.
Of course, there were a few things they hadn't done yet which would probably create the same feeling on a much greater scale. Ignoring the butterflies that seemed to be colonizing his stomach at a rapid rate, he pulled back a bit and bent his head to nibble along the curve of Amano's ear, something he knew drove the other boy crazy. "Since we don't have to worry about staying quiet for once, I thought maybe... it would be a good time to take things farther?"
"What?" Wide-eyed, Amano turned to face him, and Ohtori stopped teasing for the moment. "Choutarou, are you sure? You're ready?"
The pianist had made it clear some time ago that he was ready to finish what they'd started, but he'd also made it equally clear that he was more than willing to wait for Ohtori to feel the same. Amano was almost a year older than Ohtori, in fact his birthday was less than a week away, and the difference in their ages had always been most obvious in terms of their sexual maturity. Ohtori had always felt somewhat guilty for teasing the other boy, but also grateful that Amano never, ever pushed him beyond what he was ready for.
"I'm ready," Ohtori agreed, though part of him was still wondering if he really was. He squashed that part firmly. It was normal to be a little nervous your first time, but he couldn't let it hold him back forever. He knew his parents would say he was far too young to be doing something like this, but he also knew several other people his own age who'd already gone this far, or at least claimed they had. He'd always been considered mature for his age; he could handle this, damn it.
Hopefully, this would help fix some of the insecurity issues that plagued his relationship with Amano. The pianist knew how seriously Ohtori took this, so how could he continue to doubt Ohtori's dedication to him after this?
"I'm ready," he repeated softly, firmly. "Consider it an early birthday present, if you like. I want this, Kazuya. I want you. I love you. And I'm sorry I've been so difficult lately, I know I've put you through a lot."
"No more than I've put you through, being so jealous," Amano countered wryly. "Nobody's perfect, Choutarou, least of all us. But the important thing is that we work through it and forgive each other, right?"
Nodding, Ohtori dropped his arms so he could wrap his hands around the curve of Amano's slim hips, his fingers teasing at the back of his waistband. Amano shivered, and Ohtori gave him an impish grin. "So, did you want to go watch a movie or something?" he asked innocently. "Maybe practice music together for a while? We just had our piano tuned, it sounds really good now."
"Tease," Amano accused him, making him laugh. "Tell me you're not going to make me wait for dark and then ask to turn out the lights so I can't see you."
"Have I ever been shy?" Ohtori countered, amused. "We've done damn near everything else with the lights on, why would I suddenly insist on being in the dark now?" Tightening his grip, he lifted the smaller boy easily off his feet. With a startled noise Amano clung to his neck, and he took the few steps necessary to tumble them both onto the bed. He was careful to land beside Amano rather than on him, already searching for his lips as they hit the soft comforter.
They kissed passionately for a long while, hands wandering over clothing as they just re-familiarized themselves with each other. It had been far too long since the last time they'd had a chance to touch each other, Ohtori reflected as he shifted hungrily against the other boy. They had to be so careful not to raise suspicion, to make sure that their families would never hear or interrupt them. Putting everything he had into the kiss, Ohtori tried to convey how much he'd missed this, the feeling of intimate connection between them.
Briefly his mind flashed to the moment when he and Shishido had almost kissed after that first match. He hadn't been able to stop himself from wondering, frequently, what it would have been like if they hadn't pulled away. Would there have been this same sense of intensity, the same intimacy? Would it have been different, and if so, how? Considering the synchronicity that already existed between the two of them, Ohtori was almost scared to contemplate what would happen if they connected further.
Now was not the time to be thinking about it, however, and he shoved the thought firmly out of his mind. Here and now, the only thing he should be thinking about was Amano, and making it up to his boyfriend for the way he'd been neglecting him lately.
Focusing his attention on the boy in his arms instead of the one in his memory, Ohtori did his best to drive Amano wild by kissing alone. He loved doing this and he'd learned all the best places to rub or flick his tongue against, how to nibble slightly at the other boy's bottom lip, and just generally drive him insane. It frustrated Amano to no end when he did it, especially since he just didn't have the patience necessary to learn how to torment Ohtori the same way.
The one time when he'd asked - outside a make-out session - if Amano wanted him to stop doing it, though, the pianist had looked at him like he was crazy. From that Ohtori had inferred that his boyfriend liked being teased past endurance, and he was certainly more than happy to oblige.
Finally, when Amano was making desperate little whining noises in the back of his throat and had been reduced to clutching helplessly at Ohtori's shoulders, the taller boy took pity on him. Pulling away slightly, both of them panting hard, he looked down into dazed silver eyes. "Clothes off," he demanded more than suggested, tugging at Amano's shirt to try to get it untucked from the slacks.
Laughing, Amano recovered his senses a bit and reached for the button of Ohtori's jeans. "I thought I was the impatient one?" he teased as they rapidly shed their clothes, often getting tangled as they attempted to 'help' each other. "You'd think I was the one who'd been holding back and who liked driving you crazy."
"You should know me well enough to realize that once I decide to do something, I put everything I have into it," Ohtori countered, brown eyes dark and shining with lust. They'd done all this before, many times now. It was familiar territory and if he concentrated on that rather than worrying about what was still to come, he found he wasn't nearly as nervous.
Distracted by his thoughts, Ohtori gasped when he felt his cock wrapped in Amano's hand. The other boy had pianist's fingers, long and slender and sensitive. Unlike Ohtori whose palms were calloused from tennis and left fingers calloused from the violin strings, Amano's skin was soft and smooth and felt amazingly good and different against him.
"My turn," Amano murmured, his tone wicked as he leaned in to lick and nibble at Ohtori's collarbone and the hollow of his throat. He stroked his hand slowly over Ohtori's cock, far too slowly to satisfy, and Ohtori whimpered and tossed his head back against the pillow. If Ohtori was the best one at kissing, Amano was unarguably the better of the two of them at this, at knowing just how to touch and glide and stroke to wring the most sensation from Ohtori's trembling body.
"Kazuya," he moaned, trying to arch his hips up to get more contact. Amano pulled his hand away entirely until Ohtori subsided again, his whimpers increasing in volume. When he returned his hand to the taller boy's cock, Ohtori retaliated by reaching for his in turn.
He was a little surprised by just how aroused Amano obviously was. He was hard and dripping, clear fluid leaking from the tip of his cock fast enough to make it much easier for Ohtori's hand to slide against him. Usually it took the smaller boy a while to get to this point, and Ohtori looked at him curiously.
Amano smiled wryly back at him, lust burning in his eyes and making them seem even brighter than they usually did. "You think you can offer yourself to me like that and I'm not going to react? Gods, Choutarou, do you have any idea how often I've fantasized about doing this with you?"
The reminder of what they intended to do made Ohtori a little nervous again, but the heated look Amano was giving him turned the butterflies in his stomach into a much more pleasant twisting sensation. "I've thought about it too," he confessed softly. "I'm sorry I made you wait so long."
"Don't be sorry," Amano shook his head immediately, fingers squeezing briefly and making Ohtori cry out. "Pushing you into it wouldn't have been any fun for me, Choutarou. It was worth it to wait." Leaning in, he licked at Ohtori's sensitive neck again, increasing his pace slightly and making the taller boy pant with need. "I'm going to make you feel so good you'll wonder why you ever hesitated, though."
Grateful there was nobody home to hear the rather undignified noises he was making, Ohtori tossed his head against the pillow and ran his free hand through Amano's long ponytail. "If you tease me too much we'll end up having to wait after all," he warned, his voice tight. It had been far too long, and his own hand and fantasies just weren't as satisfying as being with his boyfriend. He always took a while to recover after coming, though, and was often far too sensitive to bear further touch for a while.
Despite the fact that he was the one giving the warning, he still moaned in protest when Amano released him. "We need... you know, lubricant, or something," Amano said, looking no less worked up than Ohtori felt. "Otherwise it'll hurt you, won't it?"
"I don't know any more about this than you do," Ohtori reminded him, breathless with something that didn't quite feel like anticipation. Locker room jokes and dirty stories had given him a basic idea of what went where, and given the fact that he was on the tennis team, not to mention the orchestra, he'd probably heard more about it than most boys his age. He'd also heard that you had to have something to make it easier or it would hurt, but he hadn't been able to work up the nerve to go into a drugstore and buy the real thing. His height made him look older than he was, but it didn't stop him from being horribly flustered at the very idea.
Thankfully, he'd also heard that it didn't have to be the real thing to work just as well. "I've got some Vaseline," he said, ducking his head in embarrassment and almost mumbling the words. "In the bedside table."
Chuckling, Amano ran his fingers gently over Ohtori's face. "You're so adorable when you're embarrassed," the pianist said, and Ohtori of course blushed more. Reaching across the bed, Amano fumbled in the drawer and finally emerged with the small jar Ohtori had swiped from the bathroom.
Unscrewing the cap, Amano dipped his fingers into the waxy gel. The distinctive scent filled the air around them, and Ohtori wrinkled his nose slightly, which made Amano laugh at him again. "You sure about this?" his boyfriend asked him seriously one last time. "We can still stop now, just do what we usually do."
No, some small, frightened part of Ohtori's mind whimpered. No, I'm not ready, it's too soon. Too much, too fast... I don't want to do this!
Taking a deep breath, Ohtori once again shoved that part of him away and ignored it. "I'm ready," he forced himself to say, his voice shaking only a bit. It pleased him that Amano had given him another chance to change his mind, but he knew if he backed out now it would just hang between them, souring their relationship further. He could do this. It wasn't like it was something horrible that was going to happen, after all. He needed to stop acting like a shy schoolgirl.
"All right," Amano agreed, some of the tension in his face relaxing at Ohtori's agreement, and Ohtori knew he'd made the right choice. "I guess... you're supposed to turn over?" the pianist continued uncertainly.
"I think so," Ohtori nodded, equally unsure. This was totally uncharted territory for both of them, and they were going to have to make most of it up as they went. Surely it couldn't be that hard to figure out. Boys had been doing this for thousands of years, and he would bet most of them had even less idea of what to do than Ohtori and Amano did.
He rolled over onto his stomach and lifted himself up on hands and knees. It felt awkward, and he wished he could see Amano's face, but he could see why this position would be most convenient for what they were doing.
Shivers wracked his spine as he felt something large and hard press against his ass, gliding gently between the cheeks. The Vaseline made the motion easy and almost frictionless, but it was still a little daunting. Ohtori had thought he was intimately familiar with his boyfriend's cock, but what was pressing against him now felt much larger than he'd expected. How exactly was that supposed to fit inside him?
"Relax," Amano whispered, leaning over him and positioning himself with one hand. "Relax, Choutarou. I don't want to hurt you."
"I trust you," Ohtori replied, his voice breaking on the words as he felt the intrusion into his body. Bracing himself, he tried to force himself to relax as Amano pushed inside him past the tight ring of muscle.
It hurt... oh gods, it hurt. It felt like he was being torn in half, and he bit his lip until it bled to stop the pained noises that wanted to escape him. His fists clenched in the sheets and he panted raggedly as Amano kept pressing forward. He wanted to cry out for the other boy to stop, to say that it hurt too much and he didn't want to do this any more.
Instead he gritted his teeth and hung on, refusing to allow even the slightest sound of pain to escape him. People did this all the time, and most of them enjoyed it enough to want to do it frequently. Surely it was going to get better once he got past this initial agony. It had to.
For some reason his mind produced the memory of Shishido lying battered and bruised on the court, knocked flat once again by another Scud Serve. He'd seen the agony in the senior's eyes, seen how much effort it took to stagger to his feet and shout 'Again!'. Ohtori could only imagine how much it would hurt to get hit by his serve, but surely it had to be worse than this.
The image helped him hang on to his determination to see this through, and finally Amano came to rest against his back, as far inside as he could be. Ohtori could feel the smaller boy shaking against him, and for a startled moment he wondered if it hurt as much for his boyfriend as it did for him. "Kazuya?"
"Choutarou." The sound of his name was little more than a gasp, but Ohtori couldn't mistake the tone for pain if he'd tried. Amano was shaking with the effort to restrain himself for Ohtori's sake, not because it hurt. "Are you okay?"
"I'm fine," Ohtori lied, forcing his voice to stay steady. It burned, and all the jokes he'd heard about people 'walking funny' suddenly made a great deal more sense, as well as being a whole lot less funny. He was grateful he'd had the foresight to do this when he would not be training with Shishido the next day because he doubted very much that he'd be able to move tomorrow, let alone run around on the courts.
Somehow, despite the fact that Amano was buried inside him there was none of the sense of connection Ohtori had been expecting. Mostly it just hurt and felt oddly full. When Amano started to move over him with increasingly powerful thrusts Ohtori moaned and bit his lip again, struggling to keep his ragged panting from turning into pained sobs. He clung to that memory of Shishido, the determination and resolve that had carried the older boy through pain far worse than this. He could do this, he could.
The first touch on his cock startled him into crying out. He'd gone mostly soft with the pain, but as Amano stroked him in time with his thrusts he slowly hardened again. Some of the pain faded at last, and was replaced with pleasure. He relaxed a bit and that helped even more, making it easier for Amano to move inside him.
It still hurt, but now it felt good too. He couldn't imagine why some people seemed so eager to do this at every possible opportunity, but it wasn't so bad. And it was clear from the noises Amano was making that it was amazingly good for the person on top. Too good, maybe; his boyfriend sounded like he was hanging onto his restraint by teeth and nails. Ohtori resolved to think of it somewhat like a blowjob - something that wasn't exactly enjoyable for him but was worth it for the pleasure it brought his boyfriend.
"Choutarou, you have to..." Amano panted, increasing the pace of his strokes even as the rhythm began to falter. "Please, I can't... I can't hold on much longer..."
"I can't," Ohtori murmured, shaking his head. He was still much too far from the edge, even though he was starting to feel more pleasure than pain. "Go ahead Kazuya, it's all right."
"But!" Amano protested almost incoherently. Ohtori was touched by the fact that the other boy wanted to hold out until Ohtori had taken his pleasure as well, but he mostly just wanted this to be over now. He tilted his hips up, hoping the sudden change would be enough to push his boyfriend over the edge.
They both cried out at the same time; Amano because Ohtori had accomplished his objective and sent him tumbling into orgasm, and Ohtori because the altered angle had caused Amano to brush against something inside him that made him see stars. Literally; bright bursts of colour exploded against his tightly closed eyelids.
Amano thrust twice more before he finally collapsed, spent, and each motion dragged the head of his cock over that exquisitely sensitive place inside Ohtori again. Shivering at the sudden onslaught of unexpected pleasure, Ohtori moaned when it stopped and left him feeling only the slow burn again.
All right, maybe this wasn't entirely one-sided after all. If he'd been feeling that with every thrust right from the start, Ohtori thought he might have been the first one to come despite the initial agony of it. Dazed by the combination of pleasure and pain, Ohtori trembled as he struggled to hold both their weight on his shaky arms.
"Kazuya..." it came out as a whine, and Ohtori swallowed. Now that the other boy wasn't moving any more the pain was fading, leaving him suffering the aftereffects of that starburst of pleasure. Amano had stopped stroking him, and his hand was just loosely clasped around Ohtori's cock as the smaller boy tried to recover from what had apparently been a very intense orgasm.
"Sorry," Amano gasped, his hand tightening and starting to move again. Ohtori shuddered with pleasure, focusing on the familiar feel of his boyfriend's hand around him instead of the full ache still reminding him of what they'd done. Amano's movements became steadier as he recovered, and Ohtori's breathing quickened as he finally neared the edge again.
He cried out as his body spasmed and contracted around Amano's softening cock, making pain spike briefly through him again. It wasn't enough to deter his orgasm, though, and he came all over Amano's hand and the comforter beneath them. It wasn't the best he'd ever experienced, not by a long shot, but it wasn't the worst either. He suspected that if Amano had still been hitting that spot inside him when he came it would have been really intense, though. The thought was appealing enough that he found he was willing to do this again, even though he'd at first thought that there was no way he'd want to repeat this experience.
His arms gave out on him at last, and Ohtori collapsed down onto the bed. The movement made Amano slip out of him with one last frisson of pain, but Ohtori barely registered it this time through the haze of orgasm. He did make a face as he realized he was lying in the wet spot, however.
"I'm sorry," Amano apologized softly, slowly moving off him to lie beside him. Ohtori wrapped the smaller boy in his arms and pulled him close, tucking Amano's head under his chin and just focusing on the familiar touch of his boyfriend's body against his.
"It's okay," Ohtori assured him, nuzzling his hair. "Really, it is. We're both new at this, we'll figure it out." That part of him that had objected earlier was protesting that he wasn't sure he wanted to do this again, no matter how good it had felt at the end, but it was getting fainter and easier to ignore. He'd taken the biggest step; he'd done it the first time. Whatever reservations he might have had about it were irrelevant now. They'd done it once, so it would be pretty stupid for him to object to doing it again. What possible reason could he give? It would only make Amano convinced once more that Ohtori was losing interest in him.
An odd sensation struck him, and he blinked. Then made a face. "Uh... I think... I need to go clean up," he said in a bit of a rush. Amano stared at him in confusion as he pulled away and scrambled off the bed, then started laughing in realization. Muttering something uncomplimentary back at his boyfriend, Ohtori bolted for the bathroom. It hadn't occurred to him that what Amano left behind in him wasn't just going to stay there. Oh, the things the movies and locker room jokes didn't tell you.
When he returned a few minutes later with a sheepish expression on his face, Amano had pulled the comforter off and bundled it into the laundry. The pianist was lying beneath the rest of the sheets, waiting for him with an amused look still on his face. The amusement faded a bit as he saw the stiff way Ohtori was walking, though. "Sore?" he asked, sitting up and pushing his now messy ponytail back off his shoulder.
"A bit," Ohtori admitted in an understatement. He crawled under the sheets and settled in, pulling Amano close against him once more. "Don't worry about it, I'll be fine. I'm not hurt, just... stretched." Though after the way it had hurt at first, he'd been more than a little relieved not to see any blood as he'd cleaned himself up. He wasn't going to admit that part, though. Amano would only feel guilty, and there was no real reason for him to.
"I love you, Choutarou," the pianist said, sighing in what sounded like contentment as he rested his head on Ohtori's shoulder and closed his eyes.
"Love you, too," Ohtori echoed, the words still feeling strange but coming a bit more easily now. He felt Amano smile into his shoulder, and couldn't help smiling a bit as well. He was sore, and exhausted, and very glad he didn't have a match or practice tomorrow. But he'd made Amano happy again, and that was worth a little discomfort on his part.
Privately however, he resolved not to ever, ever mention that it had been an image of Shishido that had gotten him through the toughest parts.
***
*flees from the rotten fruit undoubtedly being thrown at her*
Series: Prince of Tennis
Pairing: ShishiTori, Tori/?
Rating: NC-17
Word Count: chapter = 5717 fic so far = 66,548
Summary: Sometimes you don't appreciate the value of what you've got, until you don't have it any more.
This chapter is not work safe!
When the doorbell rang Ohtori was pacing back and forth in the front hall, trying to tell himself he wasn't nervous about what he was planning. There was nothing to be nervous about, or so he kept repeating until the words had nearly become a mantra. His stomach didn't seem to be quite convinced, though, nor did his sweating palms.
Even though he was expecting it, the sound of the bell startled him so badly he actually jumped. Taking a deep breath, he wiped his hands on his jeans and went to answer it. This was stupid, he was going to ruin everything.
"Hey," he greeted Amano as the door opened. His boyfriend was dressed in pressed slacks and a polo shirt; for Amano that was casual. Ohtori had to smile as he saw it, and the simple familiarity of it calmed him somewhat.
"Hey," Amano replied, stepping inside and setting his duffle bag down while he kicked off his shoes. The smaller boy was wearing his hair up again, and Ohtori watched the way the long dark strands of the ponytail slid over his shoulders as he moved. "So what's the deal with this weekend?" the pianist wanted to know, straightening and picking up his bag again. "We don't usually bother with inviting each other, we just crash wherever we are."
"Yeah, but I wanted to make sure it was my place we crashed at," Ohtori explained, grinning at him and leading the way deeper into the house. When Amano looked at him curiously, he elaborated, "My family is gone for the weekend. It's my grandmother's birthday, they took her up to a hot spring to celebrate."
From nowhere his cat Karasu appeared, running straight to Amano and twining around his ankles. Ohtori had to stifle a snicker at the long-suffering look on his boyfriend's face. It wasn't that Amano disliked cats or anything; he was just allergic to them and so tried to stay away from them, but Karasu seemed to insist on being near him any time he came over. The funniest part was that Shishido loved cats, and Karasu wouldn't have anything to do with him. Ohtori had long suspected the feline of possessing a rather large sadistic streak.
"So nobody is going to be here but us all weekend?" Amano asked to be sure, his expression slowly turning from thoughtful to wicked. "That could be... fun." Ohtori shivered at the heated look in the other boy's eyes. "How did you convince them to leave you behind?"
"I told them I have a game tomorrow," Ohtori replied, laughing. "They already know better than to try to get me to go anywhere if I've got a match scheduled." He opened the door to his room, let Amano follow him through and then nudged the cat back outside with his foot before closing the door. Having the pianist sniffling and sneezing all weekend would not be conducive to his plans.
When he looked up again, Amano had turned away from him to set his bag beside the bed. There was a tension to the other boy's shoulders that hadn't been there a minute ago. "So what time do you have to meet Shishido tomorrow, then? I guess I probably shouldn't wear you out too much..."
It was obvious the pianist was trying to keep the resentment out of his tone, but he wasn't succeeding very well. Sighing, Ohtori moved to wrap his arms around the smaller boy from behind, pulling him into an embrace. Amano resisted, staying stiff in his arms rather than leaning back against him.
"Kazuya, I know I've been neglecting you lately," Ohtori said softly, nuzzling into the soft strands of the pianist's hair. "I'm sorry, I really am. That tournament was brutal; I don't ever want to play matches on so many consecutive days again."
Between the extra training they'd put into the weeks before the tournament and how tired he'd been afterwards, Ohtori had barely seen or even spoken to his boyfriend for the entire spring break. In the end he and Shishido had eventually been eliminated in the quarterfinals, by the pair who would eventually go on to win the tournament. It was a result they were both happy with, especially considering the level they'd been playing at.
And it had gotten them a lot of attention from the tennis world in Tokyo. They'd been featured in a couple of articles and given several interviews, and if they played as well in the next tournament they might even end up being seeded after that.
It all took up a lot of time, though, and Ohtori really did feel bad about how little energy he'd had left over for Amano. He intended to make up for that this weekend, at least a little.
His words didn't seem to appease his boyfriend though, for the shorter boy remained tense in his embrace. "You say that now, but you're already starting a new tournament, aren't you? I never get to see you anymore, Choutarou! We don't have music and you're always training after school. People have been asking me if we broke up because they never see us together any more. We're not even in the same class now!"
Sighing, Ohtori held him a little tighter. Despite Shishido helping him to study he hadn't done as well on the exams as he'd have liked, and he'd placed in the 3-2 class while Amano remained in 3-1. It had disappointed his parents as well, but there wasn't anything he could do about it now. Unfortunately it did mean that he never saw Amano anymore unless they made a real effort to get together outside of school, and this was the first weekend since the new year started that he'd had a chance.
"Kazuya, I invited you over so we could spend some time together," Ohtori said wearily. "Are we going to waste all of it arguing about how we never spend time together any more?"
"I just..." Amano's voice broke, and Ohtori winced. He really needed to learn to manage his time better. He hadn't meant to hurt the other boy so badly. "I just feel like you're slipping away from me. We used to spend so much time together, and now I can't even have you for a whole weekend any more!"
With an effort Ohtori took the shorter boy by the shoulders and turned him around so they could look at each other. Amano resisted, but Ohtori was more than strong enough to just pick him up and move him if he had to, though thankfully it didn't come to that. Miserable silver eyes stared up at him, suspiciously shiny as if Amano was holding back tears with an effort of will.
"You do have me for the whole weekend," Ohtori told him softly. "I don't have a game with Shishido-san tomorrow, Kazuya, I just told my parents that so I wouldn't have to go with them. I'm not even training with him at all this weekend; I told him and Atobe that I needed a break before I started to forget what you look like."
Firmly he told his nerves to go to hell; there was nothing else he could think of that would both reassure and make it up to Amano half as well. Not to mention hopefully easing some of the guilt he'd been feeling about the fact that he couldn't stop being attracted to his partner. He was ready for this, he was.
Astonishment spread over Amano's expression and Ohtori smiled down at him, lifting his chin with gentle fingers so he could lean down and kiss him briefly. "I'm all yours, Kazuya. My parents probably won't be home until after dinner tomorrow. Two whole days where I don't intend to think about anybody but you and me."
"Choutarou..." Amano shook his head as if to clear it of a daze, then pushed up to meet his lips again in a more passionate kiss. "I'm sorry," he said when they pulled apart again, breathing a little harder. "Here I've been bitching at you when you'd done something so nice - I don't know how you put up with me sometimes."
"Because I care about you," Ohtori said firmly. Biting his lip, he steeled himself and then added softly, "Because I love you, Kazuya." It felt odd to say it after all this time, but he was being so silly about it and it was past time for him to stop. If what he felt for Amano wasn't the kind of all-encompassing adoration he'd had for Shishido last year, that didn't mean it wasn't love. What he'd felt for Shishido had been infatuation, and that wasn't really love either.
"You..." Clearly delighted, Amano threw his arms around the taller boy's shoulders and kissed him again, hard. "You said it! You really said it!" Once again Ohtori felt guilty; Amano had always assured him that he understood Ohtori's reluctance to commit himself verbally like that, but it was obvious it had been bothering the pianist more than he let on. Ohtori had always believed that actions meant more than words, since it was much more difficult to lie with your actions, but it seemed the words meant more to Amano than he'd realized.
Maybe, now that he'd finally heard them, he would feel a bit less insecure about Shishido. Leaning down Ohtori kissed him again, drawing it out and teasing with his tongue a bit this time. He'd discovered, much to his pleasure, that he really enjoyed kissing and as a result he'd gotten very good at it. Sometimes he thought it felt more intimate than anything else they'd yet done, because it created a visceral connection between them, a give and take that was more immediate than simple touch could reproduce.
Of course, there were a few things they hadn't done yet which would probably create the same feeling on a much greater scale. Ignoring the butterflies that seemed to be colonizing his stomach at a rapid rate, he pulled back a bit and bent his head to nibble along the curve of Amano's ear, something he knew drove the other boy crazy. "Since we don't have to worry about staying quiet for once, I thought maybe... it would be a good time to take things farther?"
"What?" Wide-eyed, Amano turned to face him, and Ohtori stopped teasing for the moment. "Choutarou, are you sure? You're ready?"
The pianist had made it clear some time ago that he was ready to finish what they'd started, but he'd also made it equally clear that he was more than willing to wait for Ohtori to feel the same. Amano was almost a year older than Ohtori, in fact his birthday was less than a week away, and the difference in their ages had always been most obvious in terms of their sexual maturity. Ohtori had always felt somewhat guilty for teasing the other boy, but also grateful that Amano never, ever pushed him beyond what he was ready for.
"I'm ready," Ohtori agreed, though part of him was still wondering if he really was. He squashed that part firmly. It was normal to be a little nervous your first time, but he couldn't let it hold him back forever. He knew his parents would say he was far too young to be doing something like this, but he also knew several other people his own age who'd already gone this far, or at least claimed they had. He'd always been considered mature for his age; he could handle this, damn it.
Hopefully, this would help fix some of the insecurity issues that plagued his relationship with Amano. The pianist knew how seriously Ohtori took this, so how could he continue to doubt Ohtori's dedication to him after this?
"I'm ready," he repeated softly, firmly. "Consider it an early birthday present, if you like. I want this, Kazuya. I want you. I love you. And I'm sorry I've been so difficult lately, I know I've put you through a lot."
"No more than I've put you through, being so jealous," Amano countered wryly. "Nobody's perfect, Choutarou, least of all us. But the important thing is that we work through it and forgive each other, right?"
Nodding, Ohtori dropped his arms so he could wrap his hands around the curve of Amano's slim hips, his fingers teasing at the back of his waistband. Amano shivered, and Ohtori gave him an impish grin. "So, did you want to go watch a movie or something?" he asked innocently. "Maybe practice music together for a while? We just had our piano tuned, it sounds really good now."
"Tease," Amano accused him, making him laugh. "Tell me you're not going to make me wait for dark and then ask to turn out the lights so I can't see you."
"Have I ever been shy?" Ohtori countered, amused. "We've done damn near everything else with the lights on, why would I suddenly insist on being in the dark now?" Tightening his grip, he lifted the smaller boy easily off his feet. With a startled noise Amano clung to his neck, and he took the few steps necessary to tumble them both onto the bed. He was careful to land beside Amano rather than on him, already searching for his lips as they hit the soft comforter.
They kissed passionately for a long while, hands wandering over clothing as they just re-familiarized themselves with each other. It had been far too long since the last time they'd had a chance to touch each other, Ohtori reflected as he shifted hungrily against the other boy. They had to be so careful not to raise suspicion, to make sure that their families would never hear or interrupt them. Putting everything he had into the kiss, Ohtori tried to convey how much he'd missed this, the feeling of intimate connection between them.
Briefly his mind flashed to the moment when he and Shishido had almost kissed after that first match. He hadn't been able to stop himself from wondering, frequently, what it would have been like if they hadn't pulled away. Would there have been this same sense of intensity, the same intimacy? Would it have been different, and if so, how? Considering the synchronicity that already existed between the two of them, Ohtori was almost scared to contemplate what would happen if they connected further.
Now was not the time to be thinking about it, however, and he shoved the thought firmly out of his mind. Here and now, the only thing he should be thinking about was Amano, and making it up to his boyfriend for the way he'd been neglecting him lately.
Focusing his attention on the boy in his arms instead of the one in his memory, Ohtori did his best to drive Amano wild by kissing alone. He loved doing this and he'd learned all the best places to rub or flick his tongue against, how to nibble slightly at the other boy's bottom lip, and just generally drive him insane. It frustrated Amano to no end when he did it, especially since he just didn't have the patience necessary to learn how to torment Ohtori the same way.
The one time when he'd asked - outside a make-out session - if Amano wanted him to stop doing it, though, the pianist had looked at him like he was crazy. From that Ohtori had inferred that his boyfriend liked being teased past endurance, and he was certainly more than happy to oblige.
Finally, when Amano was making desperate little whining noises in the back of his throat and had been reduced to clutching helplessly at Ohtori's shoulders, the taller boy took pity on him. Pulling away slightly, both of them panting hard, he looked down into dazed silver eyes. "Clothes off," he demanded more than suggested, tugging at Amano's shirt to try to get it untucked from the slacks.
Laughing, Amano recovered his senses a bit and reached for the button of Ohtori's jeans. "I thought I was the impatient one?" he teased as they rapidly shed their clothes, often getting tangled as they attempted to 'help' each other. "You'd think I was the one who'd been holding back and who liked driving you crazy."
"You should know me well enough to realize that once I decide to do something, I put everything I have into it," Ohtori countered, brown eyes dark and shining with lust. They'd done all this before, many times now. It was familiar territory and if he concentrated on that rather than worrying about what was still to come, he found he wasn't nearly as nervous.
Distracted by his thoughts, Ohtori gasped when he felt his cock wrapped in Amano's hand. The other boy had pianist's fingers, long and slender and sensitive. Unlike Ohtori whose palms were calloused from tennis and left fingers calloused from the violin strings, Amano's skin was soft and smooth and felt amazingly good and different against him.
"My turn," Amano murmured, his tone wicked as he leaned in to lick and nibble at Ohtori's collarbone and the hollow of his throat. He stroked his hand slowly over Ohtori's cock, far too slowly to satisfy, and Ohtori whimpered and tossed his head back against the pillow. If Ohtori was the best one at kissing, Amano was unarguably the better of the two of them at this, at knowing just how to touch and glide and stroke to wring the most sensation from Ohtori's trembling body.
"Kazuya," he moaned, trying to arch his hips up to get more contact. Amano pulled his hand away entirely until Ohtori subsided again, his whimpers increasing in volume. When he returned his hand to the taller boy's cock, Ohtori retaliated by reaching for his in turn.
He was a little surprised by just how aroused Amano obviously was. He was hard and dripping, clear fluid leaking from the tip of his cock fast enough to make it much easier for Ohtori's hand to slide against him. Usually it took the smaller boy a while to get to this point, and Ohtori looked at him curiously.
Amano smiled wryly back at him, lust burning in his eyes and making them seem even brighter than they usually did. "You think you can offer yourself to me like that and I'm not going to react? Gods, Choutarou, do you have any idea how often I've fantasized about doing this with you?"
The reminder of what they intended to do made Ohtori a little nervous again, but the heated look Amano was giving him turned the butterflies in his stomach into a much more pleasant twisting sensation. "I've thought about it too," he confessed softly. "I'm sorry I made you wait so long."
"Don't be sorry," Amano shook his head immediately, fingers squeezing briefly and making Ohtori cry out. "Pushing you into it wouldn't have been any fun for me, Choutarou. It was worth it to wait." Leaning in, he licked at Ohtori's sensitive neck again, increasing his pace slightly and making the taller boy pant with need. "I'm going to make you feel so good you'll wonder why you ever hesitated, though."
Grateful there was nobody home to hear the rather undignified noises he was making, Ohtori tossed his head against the pillow and ran his free hand through Amano's long ponytail. "If you tease me too much we'll end up having to wait after all," he warned, his voice tight. It had been far too long, and his own hand and fantasies just weren't as satisfying as being with his boyfriend. He always took a while to recover after coming, though, and was often far too sensitive to bear further touch for a while.
Despite the fact that he was the one giving the warning, he still moaned in protest when Amano released him. "We need... you know, lubricant, or something," Amano said, looking no less worked up than Ohtori felt. "Otherwise it'll hurt you, won't it?"
"I don't know any more about this than you do," Ohtori reminded him, breathless with something that didn't quite feel like anticipation. Locker room jokes and dirty stories had given him a basic idea of what went where, and given the fact that he was on the tennis team, not to mention the orchestra, he'd probably heard more about it than most boys his age. He'd also heard that you had to have something to make it easier or it would hurt, but he hadn't been able to work up the nerve to go into a drugstore and buy the real thing. His height made him look older than he was, but it didn't stop him from being horribly flustered at the very idea.
Thankfully, he'd also heard that it didn't have to be the real thing to work just as well. "I've got some Vaseline," he said, ducking his head in embarrassment and almost mumbling the words. "In the bedside table."
Chuckling, Amano ran his fingers gently over Ohtori's face. "You're so adorable when you're embarrassed," the pianist said, and Ohtori of course blushed more. Reaching across the bed, Amano fumbled in the drawer and finally emerged with the small jar Ohtori had swiped from the bathroom.
Unscrewing the cap, Amano dipped his fingers into the waxy gel. The distinctive scent filled the air around them, and Ohtori wrinkled his nose slightly, which made Amano laugh at him again. "You sure about this?" his boyfriend asked him seriously one last time. "We can still stop now, just do what we usually do."
No, some small, frightened part of Ohtori's mind whimpered. No, I'm not ready, it's too soon. Too much, too fast... I don't want to do this!
Taking a deep breath, Ohtori once again shoved that part of him away and ignored it. "I'm ready," he forced himself to say, his voice shaking only a bit. It pleased him that Amano had given him another chance to change his mind, but he knew if he backed out now it would just hang between them, souring their relationship further. He could do this. It wasn't like it was something horrible that was going to happen, after all. He needed to stop acting like a shy schoolgirl.
"All right," Amano agreed, some of the tension in his face relaxing at Ohtori's agreement, and Ohtori knew he'd made the right choice. "I guess... you're supposed to turn over?" the pianist continued uncertainly.
"I think so," Ohtori nodded, equally unsure. This was totally uncharted territory for both of them, and they were going to have to make most of it up as they went. Surely it couldn't be that hard to figure out. Boys had been doing this for thousands of years, and he would bet most of them had even less idea of what to do than Ohtori and Amano did.
He rolled over onto his stomach and lifted himself up on hands and knees. It felt awkward, and he wished he could see Amano's face, but he could see why this position would be most convenient for what they were doing.
Shivers wracked his spine as he felt something large and hard press against his ass, gliding gently between the cheeks. The Vaseline made the motion easy and almost frictionless, but it was still a little daunting. Ohtori had thought he was intimately familiar with his boyfriend's cock, but what was pressing against him now felt much larger than he'd expected. How exactly was that supposed to fit inside him?
"Relax," Amano whispered, leaning over him and positioning himself with one hand. "Relax, Choutarou. I don't want to hurt you."
"I trust you," Ohtori replied, his voice breaking on the words as he felt the intrusion into his body. Bracing himself, he tried to force himself to relax as Amano pushed inside him past the tight ring of muscle.
It hurt... oh gods, it hurt. It felt like he was being torn in half, and he bit his lip until it bled to stop the pained noises that wanted to escape him. His fists clenched in the sheets and he panted raggedly as Amano kept pressing forward. He wanted to cry out for the other boy to stop, to say that it hurt too much and he didn't want to do this any more.
Instead he gritted his teeth and hung on, refusing to allow even the slightest sound of pain to escape him. People did this all the time, and most of them enjoyed it enough to want to do it frequently. Surely it was going to get better once he got past this initial agony. It had to.
For some reason his mind produced the memory of Shishido lying battered and bruised on the court, knocked flat once again by another Scud Serve. He'd seen the agony in the senior's eyes, seen how much effort it took to stagger to his feet and shout 'Again!'. Ohtori could only imagine how much it would hurt to get hit by his serve, but surely it had to be worse than this.
The image helped him hang on to his determination to see this through, and finally Amano came to rest against his back, as far inside as he could be. Ohtori could feel the smaller boy shaking against him, and for a startled moment he wondered if it hurt as much for his boyfriend as it did for him. "Kazuya?"
"Choutarou." The sound of his name was little more than a gasp, but Ohtori couldn't mistake the tone for pain if he'd tried. Amano was shaking with the effort to restrain himself for Ohtori's sake, not because it hurt. "Are you okay?"
"I'm fine," Ohtori lied, forcing his voice to stay steady. It burned, and all the jokes he'd heard about people 'walking funny' suddenly made a great deal more sense, as well as being a whole lot less funny. He was grateful he'd had the foresight to do this when he would not be training with Shishido the next day because he doubted very much that he'd be able to move tomorrow, let alone run around on the courts.
Somehow, despite the fact that Amano was buried inside him there was none of the sense of connection Ohtori had been expecting. Mostly it just hurt and felt oddly full. When Amano started to move over him with increasingly powerful thrusts Ohtori moaned and bit his lip again, struggling to keep his ragged panting from turning into pained sobs. He clung to that memory of Shishido, the determination and resolve that had carried the older boy through pain far worse than this. He could do this, he could.
The first touch on his cock startled him into crying out. He'd gone mostly soft with the pain, but as Amano stroked him in time with his thrusts he slowly hardened again. Some of the pain faded at last, and was replaced with pleasure. He relaxed a bit and that helped even more, making it easier for Amano to move inside him.
It still hurt, but now it felt good too. He couldn't imagine why some people seemed so eager to do this at every possible opportunity, but it wasn't so bad. And it was clear from the noises Amano was making that it was amazingly good for the person on top. Too good, maybe; his boyfriend sounded like he was hanging onto his restraint by teeth and nails. Ohtori resolved to think of it somewhat like a blowjob - something that wasn't exactly enjoyable for him but was worth it for the pleasure it brought his boyfriend.
"Choutarou, you have to..." Amano panted, increasing the pace of his strokes even as the rhythm began to falter. "Please, I can't... I can't hold on much longer..."
"I can't," Ohtori murmured, shaking his head. He was still much too far from the edge, even though he was starting to feel more pleasure than pain. "Go ahead Kazuya, it's all right."
"But!" Amano protested almost incoherently. Ohtori was touched by the fact that the other boy wanted to hold out until Ohtori had taken his pleasure as well, but he mostly just wanted this to be over now. He tilted his hips up, hoping the sudden change would be enough to push his boyfriend over the edge.
They both cried out at the same time; Amano because Ohtori had accomplished his objective and sent him tumbling into orgasm, and Ohtori because the altered angle had caused Amano to brush against something inside him that made him see stars. Literally; bright bursts of colour exploded against his tightly closed eyelids.
Amano thrust twice more before he finally collapsed, spent, and each motion dragged the head of his cock over that exquisitely sensitive place inside Ohtori again. Shivering at the sudden onslaught of unexpected pleasure, Ohtori moaned when it stopped and left him feeling only the slow burn again.
All right, maybe this wasn't entirely one-sided after all. If he'd been feeling that with every thrust right from the start, Ohtori thought he might have been the first one to come despite the initial agony of it. Dazed by the combination of pleasure and pain, Ohtori trembled as he struggled to hold both their weight on his shaky arms.
"Kazuya..." it came out as a whine, and Ohtori swallowed. Now that the other boy wasn't moving any more the pain was fading, leaving him suffering the aftereffects of that starburst of pleasure. Amano had stopped stroking him, and his hand was just loosely clasped around Ohtori's cock as the smaller boy tried to recover from what had apparently been a very intense orgasm.
"Sorry," Amano gasped, his hand tightening and starting to move again. Ohtori shuddered with pleasure, focusing on the familiar feel of his boyfriend's hand around him instead of the full ache still reminding him of what they'd done. Amano's movements became steadier as he recovered, and Ohtori's breathing quickened as he finally neared the edge again.
He cried out as his body spasmed and contracted around Amano's softening cock, making pain spike briefly through him again. It wasn't enough to deter his orgasm, though, and he came all over Amano's hand and the comforter beneath them. It wasn't the best he'd ever experienced, not by a long shot, but it wasn't the worst either. He suspected that if Amano had still been hitting that spot inside him when he came it would have been really intense, though. The thought was appealing enough that he found he was willing to do this again, even though he'd at first thought that there was no way he'd want to repeat this experience.
His arms gave out on him at last, and Ohtori collapsed down onto the bed. The movement made Amano slip out of him with one last frisson of pain, but Ohtori barely registered it this time through the haze of orgasm. He did make a face as he realized he was lying in the wet spot, however.
"I'm sorry," Amano apologized softly, slowly moving off him to lie beside him. Ohtori wrapped the smaller boy in his arms and pulled him close, tucking Amano's head under his chin and just focusing on the familiar touch of his boyfriend's body against his.
"It's okay," Ohtori assured him, nuzzling his hair. "Really, it is. We're both new at this, we'll figure it out." That part of him that had objected earlier was protesting that he wasn't sure he wanted to do this again, no matter how good it had felt at the end, but it was getting fainter and easier to ignore. He'd taken the biggest step; he'd done it the first time. Whatever reservations he might have had about it were irrelevant now. They'd done it once, so it would be pretty stupid for him to object to doing it again. What possible reason could he give? It would only make Amano convinced once more that Ohtori was losing interest in him.
An odd sensation struck him, and he blinked. Then made a face. "Uh... I think... I need to go clean up," he said in a bit of a rush. Amano stared at him in confusion as he pulled away and scrambled off the bed, then started laughing in realization. Muttering something uncomplimentary back at his boyfriend, Ohtori bolted for the bathroom. It hadn't occurred to him that what Amano left behind in him wasn't just going to stay there. Oh, the things the movies and locker room jokes didn't tell you.
When he returned a few minutes later with a sheepish expression on his face, Amano had pulled the comforter off and bundled it into the laundry. The pianist was lying beneath the rest of the sheets, waiting for him with an amused look still on his face. The amusement faded a bit as he saw the stiff way Ohtori was walking, though. "Sore?" he asked, sitting up and pushing his now messy ponytail back off his shoulder.
"A bit," Ohtori admitted in an understatement. He crawled under the sheets and settled in, pulling Amano close against him once more. "Don't worry about it, I'll be fine. I'm not hurt, just... stretched." Though after the way it had hurt at first, he'd been more than a little relieved not to see any blood as he'd cleaned himself up. He wasn't going to admit that part, though. Amano would only feel guilty, and there was no real reason for him to.
"I love you, Choutarou," the pianist said, sighing in what sounded like contentment as he rested his head on Ohtori's shoulder and closed his eyes.
"Love you, too," Ohtori echoed, the words still feeling strange but coming a bit more easily now. He felt Amano smile into his shoulder, and couldn't help smiling a bit as well. He was sore, and exhausted, and very glad he didn't have a match or practice tomorrow. But he'd made Amano happy again, and that was worth a little discomfort on his part.
Privately however, he resolved not to ever, ever mention that it had been an image of Shishido that had gotten him through the toughest parts.
***
*flees from the rotten fruit undoubtedly being thrown at her*