mental health, is overrated.

[mikieman]

i was thinking about moving back home. to watsonville. but then i decided, i shouldn't. i need to stick with something for once, i said six months minimum so thats what i'm gonna do, no two ways about that one.

the first time i went back home was really terrible. the second was just shitty, but only because of some stuff that went down while i was there.

this is what i wrote my first night back home, after a month of being away. i returned to find my bedroom, to be honest, my sanctuary, had been turned into some sort of japanese themed office and meditation room.

the only thing i recognized was my futon, which i found i didn't miss all that much. see earlier entries about chris, to get that point.

anyway, this is what i wrote.

left this behind,
moved into unknown.
now just a month later,
return to the zone.

how did it happen?
this used to be home.
but not anymore,
i feel so alone.

and blackness has hit me,
its chilling my bones
inside only darkness,
i shouldn't be home.

i said my goodbyes,
and packed up my car.
with tears in my eyes,
i left for afar.

now the demon's inside me
i can't let it go.
so i write on this paper,
how the words flow.