Dec 03, 2005 01:23
i don't know waht to do with myself, i feel so sick and my tears come in waves. i can't really cry in front of people too easily because i don't want to be a downer.... man i feel sick.....god i'm going to helll. we murdered her. MURDER I SAY! i NEED JULIE I MISS HER SO MUCH. i gotta stop hyperventalating. i hope herbie takes care of her in heaven. Julie is such a fighter. God i love her. I'll never stop loving her. i honestly can't tell if i shaking still. i know i'l still shaking on the inside but i can't tell if itso n the outside. I feel like i'm gonna throw up and i'm so dizzy right now. i'm so lonely too.... i'll actually be sleeping alone tonight. that may sound weird to someone who has no idea what i'm talking about or who might think it wierd to sleep with their dog. LoL julie even had her own side of the bed and everything. Her own pillow. she got the wall side because the wall gets really cold at night, and she would always be overheated so she would sleep against the wall and keep cool. You know how God wrote, "thou shall not kill" ? thats what we did to her! we killed her!! i need her so much! evertime i was sad i would go to Julie for comfort. She was such a wonderful dog. i didn't even see her as a dog anymore. She was almost human to me. my head hurts too mcuh to type anymore.... damn i'm lonely in here....