Items to retire
Here is a list of itmes that gay guys (or any guy) for that matter in Atlanta should really retire. I tend to vomit in my mouth a little at the site of the following:
1. I Don't know what came first- the Ed Hardy Tee, or all of the "Affliction" tees. It really started with mostly African American guys wearing them, and then it spread into the gays- especially the ones who "try" to look "butch. "Well, my t-shirt has a skull on it, of course I'm butch" (and I have a tribal tattoo, silly!) You can barely enjoy a nice gay brunch without the sight of a group of gays walking in, half of them sporting these things. The only thing you are "afflicted" with is bad taste. See pic for detail
I am tired of seeing these shirts!!! There is an even more offensive and gayer version, where the shirt is a v-neck, but really looks like a scoop neck blouse. Coupled with a conch shell necklace from Abercrombie, it doesn't get any gayer than that. Please make them stop.
2. Next is "I borrowed my sisters jeans, Don't I look good in them? See pic for example. You know the ones I am talking about, with the button pockets on the ass.This pic does not do a good job of showing how tight these jeans are usually worn among the gays. Hi- I can see your g-string. Guys, please give your sister her jeans back!:
3. I have noticed more frequently this summer that there are an inordinate amount of people who wear sunglasses indoors. I am all about sunglasses when I am driving, or out and about- you know, in places with direct sunlight. However, when I step indoors, and try to talk to someone, I take them off! It's really not that brite inside that you have to keep the glasses on. My inner critic sees this, and immediately whispers "douche bag" in the direction of the offending Sunglass wearer.
4. I am tired of hearing "Guuurrrlll!" Please stop. Retire that immediately.
5. Lastly, the guys that smoke like my mom did when I was growing up. Arm raised to Jesus. Wrist bent back. Cigarette held precariously between two fingers. Other arm folded over in the crook of the cigarette holding arm.
I am not pretending to be the butchest person on the planet, but there just seems to be alot of people trying way too hard. Just "be", whatever that may be. Butch, fem, queer, dyke. I am just over all the affectations, rituals, and accessories.