Taken from Des. Pt. II.
1. WERE YOU NAMED AFTER ANYONE?
Not to my knowledge. I believe Michael and Ashley just happened to be the most popular names for boys and girls, respectively, at the time. Thus, I was named Michael and my sister Ashley.
2. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU CRIED?
I can't recall very specifically. I will say that I spent a good part of March, April and May crying.
I've little manhood to preserve.
3. DO YOU LIKE YOUR HANDWRITING?
Some days I do. Some days I don't. My handwriting is mysteriously fickle and changes almost daily. It's like my ability, or disability, to draw: Some days I am able to impress myself, effortlessly producing some elaborate illustration; other days, try as I might, I can barely produce a decent stick figure. Similarly, my handwriting fluctuates between hapharzard scribbling and borderline caligraphy.
4. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE LUNCH MEAT?
Being a good carnivore, I don't choose favourites.
Seriously though, I've never really been into the whole lunch meat scene. I'm not a fan of deli meats in general -- anything that passes through a slicer, really.
5. Do you have kids?
No. But during less crazy times, probably in the distant future -- which is never as distant as it ought to be -- I would love to have children. At least one. Maybe two. Two would be nice.
I guess it depends on how annoying the first one is.
6. IF YOU WERE ANOTHER PERSON WOULD YOU BE FRIENDS WITH YOU?
Based on what? Reading this? Probably not. If I met me in person, though, definitely yes. I'm a sweet guy, kind and modest. And funny. I think.
I hope.
7. DO YOU USE SARCASM A LOT?
It varies depending on whom I'm talking to. With some people I rarely use sarcasm, with others nearly every word bears some sarcasm. It depends on the person's sensitivity to sarcasm, I suppose. Or their ability to detect it.
In my writing I tend to use quite a bit of sarcasm, I think. Only 'cause it amuses me, sometimes, that, in text, people may be completely unable to detect whether or not I am taking myself seriously or not. It's also why I almost never use little smilies and whatnot, unless the occasion really, really calls for it.
8. DO YOU STILL HAVE YOUR TONSILS?
Yessir.
9. WOULD YOU BUNGEE JUMP?
Would you push me?
10. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE CEREAL?
I don't think I could ever, ever choose a favourite. I am a cereal fanatic. I eat cereal like it's going out of style. In actuality, I eat cereal like it's already out of style and I'm trying to revive it.
As a child I developed a reputation for being a total cereal monster and survived almost entirely on a diet of cereal. It even provoked my mom to seek a doctor's opinion. "Is it okay for him to eat only cereal?" The doctor, I guess, told her that I was healthy and that I was getting everything I really needed.
I'm still alive. And despite having a slightly expanded palate, I still devour cereal regularly.
11. DO YOU UNTIE YOUR SHOES WHEN YOU TAKE THEM OFF?
More often than not they remain tied and I pry the suckers loose by peeling them off my heels with the opposite foot. Sometimes, though, I realize that this will probably destroy my shoes and I will untie them.
Sometimes I find a comfortable compromise and I use my hands to more carefully pry them off my foot without untying. It's a puzzle with many solutions.
12. DO YOU THINK YOU ARE STRONG?
Physically? Mentally? Emotionally?
Maybe.
13. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE ICE CREAM?
I'm not sure I could choose a favourite. I'm really bad at this favourite thing. I really enjoy peanut butter, chocolate chip. I also enjoy Cookies 'n' Cream and pralines and cream. Heavenly Hash is fun to say, and to eat.
14. WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT PEOPLE?
It depends entirely on the person, really. It's difficult to say that there is one thing I notice first about people in general. I could pretend to be without a shallow moment, but if somebody had an enormous tumour growing out the side of their face, I'd probably notice that first. Wouldn't you?
Although one time I had dinner with somebody and later saw a movie with her, all the while not realizing that she was less one appendage. So I guess I'm not all bad.
Generally I think I notice people's eyes. Their smile -- especially if it's particularly radiant. Then their attitude: the doorstep to the personality. I'll notice right away if they're rude or arrogant. Disrespectful. Rude, arrogant and/or disrespectful people tend to exhibit these traits without hesitation -- they're usually on full display from the get-go.
15. RED OR PINK?
Red.
Although I have owned, and still own, a fair share of pink hats. There's something exciting about a pink hat to me.
16. WHAT IS THE LEAST FAVORITE THING ABOUT YOURSELF?
My body, probably. There are things about my personality, I suppose, that even though I may dislike at times I also can appreciate: They sort-of make me who I am.
My body, though? I'd exchange it if I could. From the neck-down I'm a train wreck -- a certified collage of grotesquerie, a collection of body parts that seem to have been assembled from a biological bargain-bin.
17. WHO DO YOU MISS THE MOST?
Natasha.
18. DO YOU WANT EVERYONE TO SEND THIS BACK TO YOU?
Is anybody even reading?
If so, by all means: Post it on your LiveJournal or, if you don't have a LiveJournal and are just reading mine, fill in the answers in the form of a comment below. I will read and be entertained.
19. WHAT COLOR PANTS AND SHOES ARE YOU WEARING?
Presently I am not wearing shoes, but my pants our blue jeans.
If I was wearing shoes I would either be wearing my brown, leathery, Adidas shoes or my entirely primary-coloured New Balance shoes. I fluctuate depending on my mood and what I'm doing.
20. WHAT WAS THE LAST THING YOU ATE?
A bowl of Harvest Crunch: Honey Nut.
21. WHAT ARE YOU LISTENING TO RIGHT NOW?
My iTunes is currently shuffling through Camper Van Beethoven tracks. The present song is Sweethearts.
22. IF YOU WHERE A CRAYON, WHAT COLOR WOULD YOU BE?
Probably Bittersweet. Or Fuzzy Wuzzy Brown.
And I'd wish I was Tickle Me Pink.
23. FAVORITE SMELLS?
I have a couple.
24. WHO WAS THE LAST PERSON YOU TALKED TO ON THE PHONE?
Some Video 99 customer. Probably an asshole. Probably an asshole with an overdue movie.
At home, I think the last person I talked to on the phone was Aaron.
25. DO YOU LIKE THE PERSON WHO SENT THIS TO YOU?
It wasn't really sent to me. I stole it. I stole it from Desiree.
And yes, I like her. She's totally Razzmatazz, even if she claims to be Black.
26. FAVORITE SPORTS TO WATCH?
The one where crazy Asians dress themselves in Velcro and catapult themselves into Velcro walls.
27. HAIR COLOR?
Brown.
28. EYE COLOR?
According to Crayola: Sky Blue, Turquoise Blue, or Cornflower. I can't decide.
29. DO YOU WEAR CONTACTS?
No.
30. FAVORITE FOOD?
Pizza. And cereal. Naturally.
Not together.
31. SCARY MOVIES OR HAPPY ENDINGS?
Can a scary movie not have a happy ending?
Or am I actually deciding between a slasher flick, and getting jerked off by a masseuse?
32. LAST MOVIE YOU WATCHED?
Last full movie? Capote.
Last night I tried to watch Trauma, though. It confused me and I turned it off before it was over. I might try to watch the rest at a time when I'm less exhausted.
33. WHAT COLOR SHIRT ARE YOU WEARING?
Blizzard Blue. Yes. It's definitely Blizzard Blue.
34. FAVORITE SEASON?
Probably Autumn.
35. HUGS OR KISSES?
Both. Simultaneously.
If I had to choose? Kisses.
36. FAVORITE DESSERT?
If I had to choose? Kisses.
Or happy endings.
Or a Peanut Buster Parfait.
37. MOST LIKELY TO RESPOND?
You.
38. LEAST LIKELY TO RESPOND?
One of those jerks who doesn't read my journal.
39. WHAT BOOK ARE YOU READING NOW?
In Cold Blood -- hence my revisiting of the Capote flick.
40. WHAT IS ON YOUR MOUSE PAD?
I'm too irresponsible to use a mouse pad.
Watch me be a rebel, bitches.
41. WHAT DID YOU WATCH ON TV LAST NIGHT?
I rarely watch TV. As such, I didn't watch anything on TV last night, to my recollection.
42. FAVORITE SOUND?
I've got a few of those too.
43. ROLLING STONES OR BEATLES?
Probably the Beatles. I guess.
44. WHAT IS THE FARTHEST YOU HAVE BEEN FROM HOME?
Los Angeles, California. I think.
45. DO YOU HAVE A SPECIAL TALENT?
I'd like to think I have a couple.
46. WHERE WERE YOU BORN?
Peterborough represent.
Not to my knowledge. I believe Michael and Ashley just happened to be the most popular names for boys and girls, respectively, at the time. Thus, I was named Michael and my sister Ashley.
2. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU CRIED?
I can't recall very specifically. I will say that I spent a good part of March, April and May crying.
I've little manhood to preserve.
3. DO YOU LIKE YOUR HANDWRITING?
Some days I do. Some days I don't. My handwriting is mysteriously fickle and changes almost daily. It's like my ability, or disability, to draw: Some days I am able to impress myself, effortlessly producing some elaborate illustration; other days, try as I might, I can barely produce a decent stick figure. Similarly, my handwriting fluctuates between hapharzard scribbling and borderline caligraphy.
4. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE LUNCH MEAT?
Being a good carnivore, I don't choose favourites.
Seriously though, I've never really been into the whole lunch meat scene. I'm not a fan of deli meats in general -- anything that passes through a slicer, really.
5. Do you have kids?
No. But during less crazy times, probably in the distant future -- which is never as distant as it ought to be -- I would love to have children. At least one. Maybe two. Two would be nice.
I guess it depends on how annoying the first one is.
6. IF YOU WERE ANOTHER PERSON WOULD YOU BE FRIENDS WITH YOU?
Based on what? Reading this? Probably not. If I met me in person, though, definitely yes. I'm a sweet guy, kind and modest. And funny. I think.
I hope.
7. DO YOU USE SARCASM A LOT?
It varies depending on whom I'm talking to. With some people I rarely use sarcasm, with others nearly every word bears some sarcasm. It depends on the person's sensitivity to sarcasm, I suppose. Or their ability to detect it.
In my writing I tend to use quite a bit of sarcasm, I think. Only 'cause it amuses me, sometimes, that, in text, people may be completely unable to detect whether or not I am taking myself seriously or not. It's also why I almost never use little smilies and whatnot, unless the occasion really, really calls for it.
8. DO YOU STILL HAVE YOUR TONSILS?
Yessir.
9. WOULD YOU BUNGEE JUMP?
Would you push me?
10. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE CEREAL?
I don't think I could ever, ever choose a favourite. I am a cereal fanatic. I eat cereal like it's going out of style. In actuality, I eat cereal like it's already out of style and I'm trying to revive it.
As a child I developed a reputation for being a total cereal monster and survived almost entirely on a diet of cereal. It even provoked my mom to seek a doctor's opinion. "Is it okay for him to eat only cereal?" The doctor, I guess, told her that I was healthy and that I was getting everything I really needed.
I'm still alive. And despite having a slightly expanded palate, I still devour cereal regularly.
11. DO YOU UNTIE YOUR SHOES WHEN YOU TAKE THEM OFF?
More often than not they remain tied and I pry the suckers loose by peeling them off my heels with the opposite foot. Sometimes, though, I realize that this will probably destroy my shoes and I will untie them.
Sometimes I find a comfortable compromise and I use my hands to more carefully pry them off my foot without untying. It's a puzzle with many solutions.
12. DO YOU THINK YOU ARE STRONG?
Physically? Mentally? Emotionally?
Maybe.
13. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE ICE CREAM?
I'm not sure I could choose a favourite. I'm really bad at this favourite thing. I really enjoy peanut butter, chocolate chip. I also enjoy Cookies 'n' Cream and pralines and cream. Heavenly Hash is fun to say, and to eat.
14. WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT PEOPLE?
It depends entirely on the person, really. It's difficult to say that there is one thing I notice first about people in general. I could pretend to be without a shallow moment, but if somebody had an enormous tumour growing out the side of their face, I'd probably notice that first. Wouldn't you?
Although one time I had dinner with somebody and later saw a movie with her, all the while not realizing that she was less one appendage. So I guess I'm not all bad.
Generally I think I notice people's eyes. Their smile -- especially if it's particularly radiant. Then their attitude: the doorstep to the personality. I'll notice right away if they're rude or arrogant. Disrespectful. Rude, arrogant and/or disrespectful people tend to exhibit these traits without hesitation -- they're usually on full display from the get-go.
15. RED OR PINK?
Red.
Although I have owned, and still own, a fair share of pink hats. There's something exciting about a pink hat to me.
16. WHAT IS THE LEAST FAVORITE THING ABOUT YOURSELF?
My body, probably. There are things about my personality, I suppose, that even though I may dislike at times I also can appreciate: They sort-of make me who I am.
My body, though? I'd exchange it if I could. From the neck-down I'm a train wreck -- a certified collage of grotesquerie, a collection of body parts that seem to have been assembled from a biological bargain-bin.
17. WHO DO YOU MISS THE MOST?
Natasha.
18. DO YOU WANT EVERYONE TO SEND THIS BACK TO YOU?
Is anybody even reading?
If so, by all means: Post it on your LiveJournal or, if you don't have a LiveJournal and are just reading mine, fill in the answers in the form of a comment below. I will read and be entertained.
19. WHAT COLOR PANTS AND SHOES ARE YOU WEARING?
Presently I am not wearing shoes, but my pants our blue jeans.
If I was wearing shoes I would either be wearing my brown, leathery, Adidas shoes or my entirely primary-coloured New Balance shoes. I fluctuate depending on my mood and what I'm doing.
20. WHAT WAS THE LAST THING YOU ATE?
A bowl of Harvest Crunch: Honey Nut.
21. WHAT ARE YOU LISTENING TO RIGHT NOW?
My iTunes is currently shuffling through Camper Van Beethoven tracks. The present song is Sweethearts.
22. IF YOU WHERE A CRAYON, WHAT COLOR WOULD YOU BE?
Probably Bittersweet. Or Fuzzy Wuzzy Brown.
And I'd wish I was Tickle Me Pink.
23. FAVORITE SMELLS?
I have a couple.
24. WHO WAS THE LAST PERSON YOU TALKED TO ON THE PHONE?
Some Video 99 customer. Probably an asshole. Probably an asshole with an overdue movie.
At home, I think the last person I talked to on the phone was Aaron.
25. DO YOU LIKE THE PERSON WHO SENT THIS TO YOU?
It wasn't really sent to me. I stole it. I stole it from Desiree.
And yes, I like her. She's totally Razzmatazz, even if she claims to be Black.
26. FAVORITE SPORTS TO WATCH?
The one where crazy Asians dress themselves in Velcro and catapult themselves into Velcro walls.
27. HAIR COLOR?
Brown.
28. EYE COLOR?
According to Crayola: Sky Blue, Turquoise Blue, or Cornflower. I can't decide.
29. DO YOU WEAR CONTACTS?
No.
30. FAVORITE FOOD?
Pizza. And cereal. Naturally.
Not together.
31. SCARY MOVIES OR HAPPY ENDINGS?
Can a scary movie not have a happy ending?
Or am I actually deciding between a slasher flick, and getting jerked off by a masseuse?
32. LAST MOVIE YOU WATCHED?
Last full movie? Capote.
Last night I tried to watch Trauma, though. It confused me and I turned it off before it was over. I might try to watch the rest at a time when I'm less exhausted.
33. WHAT COLOR SHIRT ARE YOU WEARING?
Blizzard Blue. Yes. It's definitely Blizzard Blue.
34. FAVORITE SEASON?
Probably Autumn.
35. HUGS OR KISSES?
Both. Simultaneously.
If I had to choose? Kisses.
36. FAVORITE DESSERT?
If I had to choose? Kisses.
Or happy endings.
Or a Peanut Buster Parfait.
37. MOST LIKELY TO RESPOND?
You.
38. LEAST LIKELY TO RESPOND?
One of those jerks who doesn't read my journal.
39. WHAT BOOK ARE YOU READING NOW?
In Cold Blood -- hence my revisiting of the Capote flick.
40. WHAT IS ON YOUR MOUSE PAD?
I'm too irresponsible to use a mouse pad.
Watch me be a rebel, bitches.
41. WHAT DID YOU WATCH ON TV LAST NIGHT?
I rarely watch TV. As such, I didn't watch anything on TV last night, to my recollection.
42. FAVORITE SOUND?
I've got a few of those too.
43. ROLLING STONES OR BEATLES?
Probably the Beatles. I guess.
44. WHAT IS THE FARTHEST YOU HAVE BEEN FROM HOME?
Los Angeles, California. I think.
45. DO YOU HAVE A SPECIAL TALENT?
I'd like to think I have a couple.
46. WHERE WERE YOU BORN?
Peterborough represent.