(no subject)
we disagree with the intensity of everything.
society is merely a parody of anything.
humanity is at its paramount of doubt.
there is no recollection of what it's about.
i feel dark and diluted.
not quite angry or depressed. just not situated where i want to be. things just seem off. everything seems like it needs to be readjusted, but i have no understanding of how to fix it.
it feels like, i got this great gift, only it needs to be assembled. i take everything out of the box and get really excited because it's going to be really cool when i get it put together. then i take out the manual and it's in nospeaky-ese.
i just want to drink. a lot. by myself. i want to not sleep for two days, and then crash out and sleep like the dead for the same amount of time. which i realize is probably a bad thing.
i can't tell if it's passing or not. i've been swinging through a lot of phases lately. most of them my normal questioning ones. some of them new and boring.
i have been enjoying feeling adult lately. interacting with adult people older then i am. listening to stories. enjoying connecting with people in a (shallow) mature way.
then, now, i think i'm becoming really bored with the cycles of my life. i don't really want my life to drastically change in a negative way, but i also feel so stuck.
this is distance.
society is merely a parody of anything.
humanity is at its paramount of doubt.
there is no recollection of what it's about.
i feel dark and diluted.
not quite angry or depressed. just not situated where i want to be. things just seem off. everything seems like it needs to be readjusted, but i have no understanding of how to fix it.
it feels like, i got this great gift, only it needs to be assembled. i take everything out of the box and get really excited because it's going to be really cool when i get it put together. then i take out the manual and it's in nospeaky-ese.
i just want to drink. a lot. by myself. i want to not sleep for two days, and then crash out and sleep like the dead for the same amount of time. which i realize is probably a bad thing.
i can't tell if it's passing or not. i've been swinging through a lot of phases lately. most of them my normal questioning ones. some of them new and boring.
i have been enjoying feeling adult lately. interacting with adult people older then i am. listening to stories. enjoying connecting with people in a (shallow) mature way.
then, now, i think i'm becoming really bored with the cycles of my life. i don't really want my life to drastically change in a negative way, but i also feel so stuck.
this is distance.