(no subject)
I am sooo fucking bored right now its not even funny...like the past two days.. well today i did some cleaning, and im getting rid of alot of shit. then after i was done with that I went and visited Aurora at the YMCA because shes helping out there with swimming lessons... so i saw her for a bit... then i came home and i've done nothing really.. I'm going to the beach tomorrow.. with lindsey and tanner and bob.. i think.. at least thats what me and lindsey planned... uh, Kellen went shrooming tonight... i dont know.. i find it stupid.. why does he have to do that shit? I think hes waaay smarter..and hopefully more creative to be doing that shit... i guess he wants to waste his time and trip..i guess he thinks its better then smoking weed, because it doesnt stay in your system for a month like weed..but it fucks up pretty bad for hours... oh well... hes 20, and a big boy he'll have to take care of himself.. i guess im just concerned...i love my friends, i dont want to see them do things that can hurt themselves... i dont know why Brian doesnt try and stop him..brian didnt like it when he tried it and hes his best friend, he has a lot of influence over kellen, but no, Brian goes and helps him find the shrooms...what idiots. I dont miss school, but i do miss seeing my friends there! I miss adam... and i miss just having people to talk and laugh with everyday..... Kasey hasnt called me since the first time, i guess its not that big of a deal, its not like we knew each other anyways...but he did say he wanted to meet up and hang out so i dont know why he hasnt called me!! whatevers, ashleys suppose to see if Emmie has his cell number or can get it or whatevers... and i'll give him the call, because i've already intiated everything else, except the conversation...he introduced himself to me first, but thats probably only because we were sitting next to each other at the party.... i still dont know what to think about talking to graham last night, it wasnt really a conversation... but it kinda was..hes working full time at some car thing by the bowling ally.. he didnt explain what with cars..just said something about it..s o i dont know if hes a macanic or if hes selling them or what.. he left it very vauge.. because he doesnt want me coming and "stalking" him..fuck you graham, your not that fucking important that anyone would want to do that. Yes you used to be a very good friend of mine, and you did comfort me one night, but fuck you werent very trust worthy, and you fucked yourself over... Yes i miss you and i would love to cruz with you again, but your a little too obnoxious for me... maybe you've matured... or maybe you've turned into a druggie like a lot of the others... who knows.. you didnt seem to care that i was talkign to you, your still immature i can tell that, and i bet you can tell that im not the little freshman anymore that you once knew...actually I KNOW im not the little freshman you knew.... I've changed ALOT since then, for the better... ugh, the only person that i would fucking do anything to get back is John...hes the only one that fucking matters to me.. all the esgs can go do whatever the fuck they want to.. i want my Johnny boy back... well, i want Ryan back too, but i never really had him to begin with.. and i'm closer to getting him then john, we actually might cruz this summer, but john... ihave no idea... ugh, no one really knows...all the ones that do, i cant talk to, because they hate john...whatevers im not talking about the past anymore tonight...at least about him... ummmmm whats today? Tuesday?? yeah... i want to go to the beach every day the rest of this week.. i also want to clean my room some more and just throw away everything i dont need... well... anyways i should goooooo, ihave nothing else to talk about... BLAH