why.
i'm so stupid. stupid stupid stupid. my sister yells at me every time i talk about him now but thankfully i don't do it that often so we're not completely alienated.
and i feel dumb because i'm over him!! i am i am i am!!!
except i'm not.
well, i kind of am. but i just want to know one thing and then i can be completely done with it. actually, two things.
first.
why the HELL did he come to my birthday party?!?!?
i know that question sounds random, but i've wanted to know since it happened; because it's not like we had been talking before then, and it's not like we talked much afterword, or even during, for that matter. why wasn't he out getting drunk on st. patrick's day (which he did later, but why not earlier when he may have had more fun?) ?? i want to know. i don't know why it's bothering me so much, especially a freaking four months after the fact. but whatever. i'll probably never find out.
second.
what kind of relationship did we have? it wasn't anything, really. i was thinking about it today. we weren't really acquaintences (unless you count only the last like two or so months of this year, when we almost never talked), we weren't really friends, and we were definitely not .. like... THAT... so what the heck were we? it was just like a weird sort of weird tension. the entire time. at least for me.
blegh. i'll probably never know that either.
i'm going to college with this dude. G-d help me.
off to go make myself less puzzled.
and i feel dumb because i'm over him!! i am i am i am!!!
except i'm not.
well, i kind of am. but i just want to know one thing and then i can be completely done with it. actually, two things.
first.
why the HELL did he come to my birthday party?!?!?
i know that question sounds random, but i've wanted to know since it happened; because it's not like we had been talking before then, and it's not like we talked much afterword, or even during, for that matter. why wasn't he out getting drunk on st. patrick's day (which he did later, but why not earlier when he may have had more fun?) ?? i want to know. i don't know why it's bothering me so much, especially a freaking four months after the fact. but whatever. i'll probably never find out.
second.
what kind of relationship did we have? it wasn't anything, really. i was thinking about it today. we weren't really acquaintences (unless you count only the last like two or so months of this year, when we almost never talked), we weren't really friends, and we were definitely not .. like... THAT... so what the heck were we? it was just like a weird sort of weird tension. the entire time. at least for me.
blegh. i'll probably never know that either.
i'm going to college with this dude. G-d help me.
off to go make myself less puzzled.