(no subject)
Well, that was an interesting weekend at home. I am not sure if I am less stressed out or not. Oh well, all that matters is I got away from school, and got to see my parents and my kitties.
Sometimes I think I am never going to be satisfied. I am doing well in my program, and my average is going to kick ass. Yet I am not content? A large part of me is saying "Go back to Ottawa and finish college from there." But the silly part of me feels almost obligated to stay here, for the time left. Part of it is sticking around so my roommate and I can stay in the place we are in until we are finished the 4th year of our post secondary education (OH my god! Are we really approaching that point? Has it really been that long?). It's almost like I feel like I can't quite leave until the time I would have finished uni in this area. Yeah, I know, I am strange. Not to mention, I love the kid I work with, and it has been amazing to watch him grow and develop, and somehow, I am not quite ready to leave him yet.
The logical side of me is also saying "Why go back to Ottawa now? You are planning to apply to Ryerson to finish your degree there, and you would just have to leave again." And this is true...I think it would bother me more to move back home and build a routine over the span of a year, then change it all again to go live in Toronto and attend Ryerson. So here I am. Sometimes a year seems a lot longer than a lifetime...Perception is odd, isn't it?
I don't know what I want, and maybe I shouldn't know. And maybe I never will. All I know is I think too much sometimes. Meh.
Sometimes I think I am never going to be satisfied. I am doing well in my program, and my average is going to kick ass. Yet I am not content? A large part of me is saying "Go back to Ottawa and finish college from there." But the silly part of me feels almost obligated to stay here, for the time left. Part of it is sticking around so my roommate and I can stay in the place we are in until we are finished the 4th year of our post secondary education (OH my god! Are we really approaching that point? Has it really been that long?). It's almost like I feel like I can't quite leave until the time I would have finished uni in this area. Yeah, I know, I am strange. Not to mention, I love the kid I work with, and it has been amazing to watch him grow and develop, and somehow, I am not quite ready to leave him yet.
The logical side of me is also saying "Why go back to Ottawa now? You are planning to apply to Ryerson to finish your degree there, and you would just have to leave again." And this is true...I think it would bother me more to move back home and build a routine over the span of a year, then change it all again to go live in Toronto and attend Ryerson. So here I am. Sometimes a year seems a lot longer than a lifetime...Perception is odd, isn't it?
I don't know what I want, and maybe I shouldn't know. And maybe I never will. All I know is I think too much sometimes. Meh.