Mexican Ramen
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Mexican Ramen
Chapter 2
The next morning after everyone had taken turns cleaning up the mess Gackt had unwittingly created the night before, they all stood in the living trying to decide what to do about Gackt’s temporarily broken fingers.
“I did what again?” Gackt sat on the couch staring at his hands that had been wrapped up with layers of cut up Strawberry Short Cake sheets.
“Well, fust you did something like this,” Toshiya said. He gave out a sour sounding battle cry and poorly imitated Gackt’s master-like fighting skills. “Then, with eyes still not open, this.” He then began to attack and kick out at the built-in pueblo-looking bookshelf nearest to him. Somewhere around then is when everyone just sort of started tuning him out.
Rya suddenly notices the sheets that Gackt’s hand is wrapped up in and comes closer to him for inspection. “Hey, I have sheets like that too. Where’d you get yours from?”
Gackt’s eyes meet Rya’s, then to Takai’s. “Umm… I all my sheets are silk or satin.”
Rya reaches her hand out and touches the material. “But this is cotton.”
In the background Takai is slowly sneaking away. Everyone notices except for Rya and the still fighting maniac, Toshiya. Gackt sighs and hangs his head.
Mienaku polishes off the remainder of her coffee and slams it down on the Korean import coffee table. What was supposed to be a dramatic sound effect actually tuned into a horrible wood-smashing sound, as the table collapsed upon itself. “Oops,” she said with a shrug. “Toshiya, please don’t buy junk from some vendor who dresses up like a giant hotdog named Taco Bob anymore.”
Toshiya, who incidentally had dressed up as a boxer today, is now adding in special moves for “fighting” the bookshelf. He acknowledges Naku with a simple ‘Hai’, and then ducks his head down as if the bookshelf had just swung back at him.
Mienaku, who had been temporarily engrossed with Toshiya’s fighting, shook herself out of it. “Okay, well, what bothers me is about how often this is going to happen. Do you always sleep walk and hurt yourself?”
Gackt looks to the ceiling for a moment or two before replying. “ I don’t know.” His eyes then cringe. “Oh, I have an itch. I can’t touch me.” Looking awkward, he starts rubbing his back on the couch.
A fast pace thudding drew nearer as Takai runs back into the room. “Oh! Let me help!” Diving onto to couch she slashes out her claws and begins to back rape Gackt with her razor talons.
Rya, who had found safety under the couch from the form of the previous flying Takai, peeks her head out. “Don’t be greedy, Tai.”
“Yea,” chimed in Mienaku. “We can take turns. I dib Monday through Friday!”
Takai’s mouth drops down. “You hoe! No way in hell!”
Turning her head slightly to the side, Mienaku smiles sweetly. “ Awe, such talk like that will make those wrinkles in your face so much worse.” She turns away to talk to Gackt who is wondering what they are dibbing.
Toshiya stops boxing and walks over to Rya. After a second she notices that he is now sporting a nurse outfit. “Ooh. That was a nifty trick,” she replied with a wink. “You gotta teach me that one sometime.”
Smiling back at her he whispered, “Rya, didn’t you want a day?”
“Nah,” she whispered back. “I’ll just sneak in at night when they’re sleeping,” she said with an evil smile on her face and tapping the tips of her fingers together.
“Rya! Double dosage now,” Takai commanded with one palm held out.
Rya trots up to Takai with a syringe full of a dark caffeine serum and wearing a nurse outfit. Takai catches a glimpse of the outfit from the corner of her eye and does a double take. She looks over Rya’s new getup and then glances to Toshiya who is wearing now Rya’s clothes. “That was quick.”
“What was?” Amai appears from out of nowhere and soon leaves to go measure Toshiya’s waist, height, etc. She says nothing to him as she does this and Toshiya, who must have thought that this was a new game, starts giving her new ideas of what else she can measure.
“Oh! Measule how fal it is flom my ear to my knee.” Toshiya exclaimed with a little too much joy.
Takia rolls her eyes and then turns back to her original objective, Naku, with syringe in hand. She squirts a little bit of it into the air to see if it’s good to go. Silently, she stalks over to Naku.
“So, you dibbed me, light?” Gackt meant ‘right’, but that’s Japanese Engrish for you.
Before Mienaku, or Naku, or Miku, what ever you want to call her, could answer, Takai plunged the syringe into Naku’s neck. Now, most people would have noticed something like this, but Naku had been hyped up on taking this crap for so long that a swarm of twelve-foot mosquitoes could have attacked her and sucked her dry without her noticing. In fact, afterwards, if she didn’t notice the huge holes in her skin, she would probably wonder why she felt so funny.
Stepping back, Takai tosses the syringe behind her, which makes a thud sound, followed by a girlie scream. Looking back, she sees the syringe sticking into the wall right next to Toshiya, who is checking his side and laughing now.
“It missted me Yeesss! Yeesss!” Toshiya sang performing his celebratory ‘yes’ victory dance.
Rya watched Toshiya for a second longer before deciding to mimic the dance. Unfortunately, no sooner had she grasped the dance did she end up slipping on some caffeine sprinkles on the floor. This catches Naku and Gackt’s attention, but before they can turn around to look, Takai dives onto the floor next to Rya and shoves her over to the side.
“What was that?” Mienaku asks.
Trying to look her part, Takai replies, “I was so devastated about you being unfair and getting Monday through Friday, well, I guess I fell in broken heartedness.”
Looking puzzled, Gackt gestures towards Rya and asks, “How did Rya get on the floor?”
Grabbing Rya’s shoulders, Takai pulls her close to her. “She shares my pain.” Rya rubs fiercely at her elbows and gives Takai “the look”.
Mienaku narrows her eyes at Takai. “Fine. Even though I know you’re probably lying…” She pauses to look around. “…About something…” Stretching out the sentence, you could tell that she was buying time to think of something, but in the end, she ended up shrugging and finally let the thought go. “I’m in a good mood, so I’ll give you one more day. But that still gives me one more than you.”
Hearing a low, drawn out moan, everyone turns his or her attention back to Gackt. “I hope my hands heal soon. I wanna be the one who touches myself.”
“I know of someone that can heal you, su-pa saiyan fast!” Toshiya exclaimed, throwing his pointer finger towards the sky.
“A doctor?” Rya wondered.
“Duh, what else. A faerie?” Mienaku lashed back with her arms crossed.
Toshiya turned his head back to see Mienaku. “Actually yes!” The lights then dramatically turned off, thanks to side effects by Rya. “You see, in Japan, there is a myth of a mystical, magical farie that can heal you if you only believe in him,” he says in his most dead sexy voice. Suddenly changing moods from sexy to ultra perky, he adds, “Should I call him?”
“Please, burst your bubble away.” Takai added in her most sweet voice.
Two hours later, or in Naku’s time, 12 cups of coffee later, the Mexican doorbell sounded off to “la cucaracha”. Toshiya answers the door, this time in a maid’s outfit. Upon opening the door, his outfit is almost perfectly imitated by the woman- man- woman-man- woman-man standing in front of him. Toshiya flings the door wide open and embraces the gothic dressed maid before him.
Meanwhile, caught by the attention of the Mexican doorbell, everyone stampedes to the front door to see whom it is, with the exception of pissy Takai, taking up the rear.
The beautiful man with a hint of smile attempts to make a decent, slight bow with Toshiya still clinging to him. Gackt suddenly intervenes and asks Toshiya politely in Japanese to give Mana-sama some air. (How everyone understood that, is unknown. Perhaps it was some of that good ‘ol Mana magic.)
Toshiya, still grinning from ear to ear, backed up.
“Ohhh. He’s pretty.” Rya turned to look around the group with a pathetic pouty face. “Can I keep him?”
Mienaku hits Rya over the head with a rolled up newspaper. “No.”
Rya snapped her fingers together. “Drats. Well, you can’t blame me for trying.”
“But I can.” Amai says with a quick laugh in Rya’s face. Rya jumped back in surprise and fear. Surprise because Amai appeared from out of nowhere and fear from the expression on her face. Somehow Amai had managed to smile, look pissed, and yet happy about it all, in a not so friendly way. No one could blame Rya for her reaction for no one could ever figure Amai out. For Christmas the whole group was planning on putting together whatever pesos they could to get her a proper straight jacket. One she wouldn’t be able to escape from.
“Agghh! Don’t do that,” Rya cried standing on one leg with her hands clutched near her face.
A small giggle from Mana brought everyone back to their guest. Without trying, Mana had just won everyone over by that lace-gloved hand covering his mouth from his tiny giggle.
Rya sighed. “That was beautiful,” she said as if it was love at first sight. “Yea! So many bishonen all in one house now!” Again she clutched her hands together near her face, but this time with a dreamy expression.
“Mine!” Amai practically spat out loud to the group. Now standing next to Mana, she just stood there with a crazy look on her face and made tiny chuckles to herself.
Mienaku was the first one to comment. “Is that the letter ‘A’ on your forehead?” She asked Mana in disbelief.
Amai hid the marker behind her back as fast as she could, but not before Gackt got a good glimpse of it. “It’s pelimanent!” He exclaimed.
“Peli-what?” Rya asked scratching her head.
“Permanent. They can’t say their ‘r’s,” Takai informed sighing, having said this many moons before.
Mana’s eyes averted upward as he took his gloved hand and wiped it across his forehead. He then brought his glove back to look at it. His face was puzzled and most of us knew why. Not only does a black glove not show a black mark, it just so happens that permanent marker doesn’t come off. O, may he have fun with that and may Amai be blessed with the ability of running faster than Gackt can do his convulsion dance.
Surprisingly, without turning the bowels of hell rage on Amai, Mana simply turned his head to look at her. But it was too late. Faster than anyone could track, Amai had quite easily mastered the technique of vanishing into the air, some strange universe, or maybe even the underskirts of Mana’s dress. No one really knew.
“What the hell,” Takai remarked.
Everyone bustled around then trying to help. Mana was shown his new quarters, then Toshiya and Gackt offered their advise on how to get the mark off, seeing that they wore and knew more about makeup more than the girls. Yes, sad, but true. Mienaku offered to make dinner, seeing how no one wanted to wait around for Gackt’s four day cooking. And as healthy sounding as Butabara sounds, it may be oh so magically delicious, just not as much for those with heart problems. After dinner, Magical Farie Mana gave his first rule to be followed to heal Gackt.
Gackt was sitting on the couch, in his normal pose with legs spread in an ‘I don’t give a damn’ way or ‘world, look at the package I’m packing’ way. Either way, he looked almost comfortable, that is if you ignored the huge strawberry Short Cake mittens. Rya and Mienaku were on either side of Gackt, already offering their services to help touch him. Rya had an arm, and Naku, oddly enough a shin. Toshiya sat in the middle of the room in an over-sized Santa outfit, playing with two boxing battle robots. Meanwhile, Takai sat on the couch opposite of the other, with her feet up, taking up the whole couch and Mana stood in the front of the room before them all with a mark of an A surrounded by a freshly scrubbed, red skin.
“First rule,” Mana said saying his ‘r’ perfectly. “There will be no smoking in the home.”
Gackt scowled. Toshiya looked up, still playing, but the silence extended until the head of one of the robots popped up.
“Nani?!?!” Gackt said with a held rage. “Nan de yo, baka yaro?” Translation: What is this, stupid bastard? To us non-smokers, this first rule made Mana almost god-like for trying to save our poor, dying lungs.
“Second rule,” Mana continued. “Swearing will not be tolerated.”
“Shit,” Takai said under her breath. It escaped all but Magical Faerie Mana’s very magical hearing, as he soon turned his attention towards her. Takai’s eyes widened in surprise at his hearing. “Uh, I wasn’t finished. I was going to say Shitake.”
Rya apparently thought the whole situation was very funny and not only ended up sharing her laughter, but a tiny friend that squeaked out as well. Upon this accident, she quickly stomped her foot down on the ground. Still laughing she replied in between breaths, “Sorry, frog.”
Gackt glanced at her, not really sure what just happened or what was so humorous.
Mexican Ramen
Chapter 3
Later that day, the sound of la cucaracha sounded through the house, quickly followed by the thumping sounds of someone running.
As she dashed into the living room, Rya caught sight of Mana standing in front of the Mexican fireplace. Quickly trying to halt her mad dash for the door, or at least slow it down, she ended up tripping over her own feet and landing face down in front of the door.
“I got it!” Takai cried, as she stepped over the limp form of Rya. Opening the door she froze, staring at whomever it was outside. Blinking a couple of times, she closed the door. Turning, she faced the others who were now standing in the living room, watching her.
“Well?” Mienaku asked. “Who is it?”
Glaring at each of her roommates in turn, Takai finally asked, “ Who the hel-“ She cut herself off as she caught a glimpse of Mystical Mana in the corner of her eye. Rephrasing her question she continued, “heck ordered pizza from some greasy Mexican?”
Staring at Takai with a confused look on his face Gackt asked, “Pizza? Greasy Mexican?” Smiling suddenly as he understood what Takai was saying, Gackt reached for the door. He fumbled with the door trying to get it to open but soon slumped in defeat when his Strawberry Shortcake wrapped hands couldn’t grip the knob. Gackt finally turned towards Mana.
As if he understood what poor little Gackuto needed, maybe it’s that faerie magic; Mana reached past both Takai and Gackt and opened the door.
Standing on the other side of the door was a slightly fuming, um well, lets just say it looked like a pissed off Mexican with a pizza.
At Gackt’s exclaimed, “Hyde!” Takai removed herself from the doorway so that the greasy Mexican, uh we mean Hyde, could enter.
“Okurete gomen ne.” Hyde apologized as he forgot his anger upon seeing Gackt. Hyde gave his friend one of his most dashing smiles that seemed to transform his face and then embraced his long time buddy from Japan.
“Don’t be sorry for being late,” Mana said from behind the group. “Just pretend that time doesn’t exist.”
Rya looked up from her once face planted position from the ground. “Huh? Did I hear that right?”
Mienaku leaned down towards Rya and lowered her voice. “I think he’s going by his faery time.”
“Ohhhhh….” Rya looked at Naku for a second longer then spat out “Okies,” before once again dropping her face into the ground.
The thud sound brought Gackt’s attention back to his roommates as he then began to introduce them. He first introduced the form of Rya on the ground as the unexplainable one, as she replied with a Boy Scout salute into the air, Mienaku, with nerves of steal with the help of caffeine, Mana as the magical farie that could heal him, Takai, the ever pissy one, Amai, the one to be careful of, and Toshiya, the ever happy carefree one of the group.
He gave a curtsey bow and then stopped when his eyes saw Takai, who was looking at the ceiling at if there could possible be something of interest tattooed there, for only her to see. “Were you referring to me as a greasy Mexican?”
All eyes were on Takai as they waited for a response. Finally, she just shrugged it off and finally met his gaze. “Uh, I didn’t mean bad greasy. Greasy can be good,” Takai said improvising as she went along. “You remember Grease Lightning? Well, if not, lets just say it was the healthy kind of greasy that wouldn’t have aged John Travolta as bad as he is today.”
Mienaku let out a long low whistle. “That statement had to hurt.”
Takai tried to once again explain herself, but one by one, people stopped listening and walked away. In the end, she was left trying to explain herself to Mana. After a few minutes that she finally gave up as well and left to go work on a project in her room.
Thirty minutes or so into a picture that she was creating of a not so G-rated Gackt and a slip and slide, Takai postponed her computer-generated art at the sound of Hyde’s voice. “…and here you would think it would be soft, but it’s not, instead it’s hard.”
Takai stood up and peered around her room. Upon seeing no one she begrudgingly sighed. “Why do I hear Hyde?”
“…yet here you would think that it would be hard and its soft…”
Sounding as if the voice was nearby, Takai searched her room but found not one single shred of the Japanese-looking Hispanic. Shrugging it off, she then went back to coloring her character.
“..and here it should be rough. Instead it’s smooth, almost too smooth, as if there’s no texture at all.”
Her hand freezing over the mouse, Takai stopped her adjustments on her artwork as Hyde’s voice once again echoed throughout her room. Looking around, she expected to find him standing behind her, critiquing her coloring as she worked. Finding nothing, she went back to fixing her characters left pants leg.
“..here it’s so flat-“
Screaming in frustration, Takai jumped from her chair and did another quick search of her room. Coming back to her desk, she eyed her coffee cup. She hadn’t made the coffee today, Naku had. Remembering previous experiments her crazy roommate had attempted with food, she fled from her room in search of her caffeine fiend friend.
Takai pauses in the hallway as something in the bathroom catches her attention. Going back she looks inside to find Rya with her head practically in the toilet bowl, screaming Hyde’s name.
Clearing her throat, Takai watches in amusement as Rya jumps. Startled, she drops the toilet seat on her head. Spinning, Rya turns to face Takai in the doorway as she rubs her head.
“What are you doing?” Takai asks.
“Looking for Hyde,” Rya states as if it should have been obvious just by watching her.
“And why,” Takai ask one eyebrow raised, “would he be in the toilet?”
“Well,” Rya starts staring at her feet, “he wasn’t under the couch, or in the fridge, or in the closet, and I know sometimes I fall in the toilet. So, I thought maybe he had fallen in and couldn’t get out. I mean I could hear him but not see him.” Still looking at her feet she asks, “Where else was I suppose to look?”
Waiting a few minutes, Rya looks up, expecting the doorway to be empty. Upon seeing Takai still standing in the doorway, a stupefied expression on her face, she asks, “Um, Takai?”
Suddenly snapped out of it, Takai asks, “Did you have any coffee this morning?”
“I don’t like coffee. Remember?” Rya answers.
“Just checking.” Takai says as she walks out of the doorway.
Coming into the living room she finds what looks like the ass of a giant rabbit sticking out from under the couch.
Walking around to the backside of the couch, she sees Toshiya with a sucker in his mouth playing with a Tonka truck.
“Uh, Toshiya?”
Looking up at her he grins. “Hey, Takai, look at this!” Taking the sucker he holds it up for her viewing pleasure. “Someone left this under the couch, and it’s watermelon!”
“Um, that’s great!” Takai states, stressing the great, “but what are you doing under the couch?”
“Well,” Toshiya starts as he pushes his truck around making little ‘vroom, vroom’ noises, “I was looking for Hyde, but I couldn’t find him.” Frowning he scrunched up his nose. “But look what else I found,” he exclaimed, grinning again as he showed Takai his Tonka truck.
“Great!” Takai said. Looking around the living room she asked Toshiya, “Have you seen Naku lately?”
“Nope,” he said between ‘vroom vrooms’,”but I can tell you she’s not under the couch.” Rolling her eyes, Takai muttered, “Thanks,” as she walked out of the living room.
Heading for the kitchen she stopped as she once again heard Hyde’s voice echoing throughout the house. “Do you have to remove your pants?” Looking around, Takai still doesn’t see him.
Entering the kitchen, she stops in front of the fridge. Feeling slightly foolish she opens it. Upon finding no Hyde, and no food she closes it, muttering to herself about stupidity.
Turning around, she finds Mienaku standing in the doorway, staring at her.
“Please tell me that you hear Hyde too, and that it’s not the coffee.”
Staring at her roommate for a moment longer, Takai answers, “ I hear Hyde too and it’s not the coffee.”
Sighing in relief, Mienaku heads for the coffee pot. After refilling her mug, she asks, “So where do you think he is?”
Not really listening, Takai answers, “Well he’s not under the couch, in the fridge, or in the toilet.”
Trying not to choke on her coffee, Mienaku puts her hand on Takai’s forehead. “Well you don’t seem to have a fever.”
Snapping out of her daze, Takai smacks Mienaku’s hand from head, almost causing her to spill her precious coffee.
“Agghh! You hit me, you bitch! I’m gonna tell Mystical Mana on you!”
Shrugging, Takai stated, “Fine then, I’ll tell him that you cussed,”
As Hyde’s voice echoed throughout the kitchen, followed by a faint fermented goat cheese scent, both girls looked at each other.
Walking from the kitchen, Takai stormed through the halls opening all the doors and looking in. Naku quickly followed her, mug in hand.
As they came to the last of the 27 rooms, Takai turned the knob, only to find it locked. Looking at Naku, she motions her closer to the door. As both girls press their ears to the door they could hear Gackt and Hyde’s voices from within.
A muttered, “Bingo!” from Takai startles Naku into dropping her coffee. As they both reach for the mug of hot java, they bump heads and crash against the door, knocking it open.
Looking up from their positions on the now open room’s floor, they find a nearly naked Gackt and a blindfolded Hyde standing before them.
Blushing, Takai tries to scuttle from the room. Meanwhile, Mienaku was getting comfy on the floor sipping at the remaining coffee in her mug. “Please,” she says, whipping a camcorder from thin air, “continue.”
Pulling down his blindfold as he hears someone other than Gackt, Hyde looks around. Upon seeing Mienaku on the floor with a camcorder in her hand he turns to Gackt. “Has she been here the whole-” Finally registering Gackt’s near nudity, Hyde stammers off.
“Ah,” Mienaku states sadly, “it seems playtime with ‘junior’ is over.” Stashing her camcorder back in its hideaway, she gets up from the floor. “And I only just got here.” Still sipping at her coffee she walks towards the door. Halfway there, she grabs Takai, who was still trying to stealthily escape. As she exited, embarrassed roommate in toll, she closes the door behind her.
Takai heads back to her room wanting to finish her project but stops at the sound of a sneeze. She slowly stops and turns around only to find that no one is behind her. She shrugs it off and heads back to her room. At her doorstep, hand on the knob, she hears somebody blowing their nose, soon followed a minute after by the sound of a liquid making a huge drop into another liquid substance. Takai’s face slightly contorts as she realizes that not only can she still hear Hyde, but now everything that he does as well. Take now for example. Hyde was probably taken a good ‘ol pisser into that freeze your ass off until goose bumps populate your ass from that hell and damnation freaking cold ceramic bowl that Rya had planted her face in just moments ago. What a peachy thought.
“Naku!” Takai yelled down the hall.
Moments later fast foots steps could be heard pummeling the wooden floors at a rapid pace.
“Hold on a moment!” Mienaku yelled back as she barely rounded the corner without smashing her running form into the wall. She slowed to a bare stop in front of Takai, her socks sliding on the almost glassy floor. She had to catch her balance before finally looking at Takai.
“No wait,” Mienaku said waving her hands apart in the air as she spoke. “You hear Hyde take a wiz.”
Takai backed away from her door. “Good, you heard it too then.”
“Well, duh, I was listening in on the bathroom door with Rya and Toshiya.”
“What???” Takai replied half shocked.
“Yea, I was surprised too that Toshiya wanted to listen in.” Mienaku shrugged. “I guess he thought it was some sort of game and he didn’t want to be left out.”
“Umm. Okay. But what I really meant was.. was…” Takai stops and looks up to the ceiling.
Naku laughs and points at Takai. “You forgot what you were going to say, didn’t you?”
Giving Naku “the look” slows Naku down to the occasional chuckle. “Dammit! I knew what I was going to say, but your comment just threw me way off. So, uh… So dammit!”
“You were talking about hearing Hyde pee.” Mienaku stopped for a second. “No wait, you weren’t there. How did you hear him?”
“Ah! Thank you! That was my point. We can still hear Hy..” The sound of Hyde’s voice cut through then, silencing the house. “NANI???!!!??”
“To the downstairs main living facility of the pueblo!” Mienaku sounded off to the tune of Batman going to the bat cave.
The two then proceeded to the new secret elevator that Gackt had found by accident one day. Only the three of them knew about it, and none were about to share its location. If the others wanted to know about it, they had to discover it as well. One of the coolest attributes of the elevator was that it was built into the wall that looked like a giant and intricate mirror piece, straight down four flights. This way, others could not see in, or even know about it, when the passengers onboard could see clearly out as if the wall was glass. Funny thing was, it was on the opposite side of where the stairs were.
Mienaku chuckled as she pointed at the form of Rya hurdling herself madly down the four flights of steps. “Ahh, poor Rya. We gotta tell her about his thing one day. If she breaks her neck running like that, from whom would I get my daily laugh?” She looks at Takai. “Oh, never mind. You’re here.” Naku smiled sweetly.
“Yea, yea, choke it up. It wouldn’t be my fault if one day something accidentally slipped into your coffee that knocks you out. Beware: you may find yourself strapped to the bottom of an air plane one day..” Takai’s sentence and thoughts trailed off as she began to laugh, pointing to the stairs.
Mienaku followed her finger to the form of Gackt running one floor behind Rya, just as madly as she was. Only maybe a little faster. It was kinda scary how fast that boy could really high tail it when need be. Sad thing was, he knew about the elevator. He was the one who found it.
By the time that Rya and Gackt had both reached the bottom floor, Mienaku and Takai were there in the middle if the space, between the elevator and the stairs, still busting a stitch over having seen Gackt use the stairs.
“What’s so funny?” Rya stopped to ask them as Gackt kept his speedway to the living room.
“Stairs..” Takia squeezed out in between breaths. Rya looked back and forth, confused, and scratched her head before finally shrugging and running off to catch up with Gackt.
“Demo..naze?” Hyde’s voice once again spoke.
Mienaku and Takai finally dragged themselves to the living room, wiping their eyes from the tears that had leaked out during their hysteric epidemic. The only personage that was absent was Toshiya and Amai, who may or may not show up at the speed of lightning, depending upon how much like gold she was following Mana’s rule.
“Let me get his straight,” Rya stated to Mana from a few feet away. “So you’re telling us that your powers sometimes tend to flux, depending on how many people are around you, and that is why we can all hear Hyde?”
“Yes, and no” Mana said shaking his head with a tiny sigh. “I’m afraid it has spread.”
“But we have only heard Hyde so far.” Mienaku said as she sat down on the couch next to Gackt.
“Incorrect. I believe that you also heard… myself, using the restroom.”
Everyone’s jaw dropped and Mienaku let out a low whistle.
“But not to worry,” Mana continued. “So far it is only the two of us..”
The sound of a light scratch was heard in the same way that everyone had heard Hyde talk and Mana…pee. Everyone turned their heads as the noise continued and left Gackt as the main spotlight of attention. He apparently was the only one unaware of this fact, seeing as how he was still attempting to scratch an itch with his wrapped up hands.
Mana continued once again, but in a heavier voice. “…make that now three of us.”
Gackt’s head rose at that. “Whose the ta-lurd?” Note: this is suppose to third, not ta-lurd, but why try to correct him? Wasn’t watching him try to scratch himself precious enough to make up for it?
“Don’t look at me,” Rya kicked in. “If I was the turd, you would know it.”
“Rya. Do this for me: Shhhh… Shhhhhhh….” Mienaku demonstrated by putting her finger up to her lips.
Before Rya could even begin to think of a retort the sound of la cucaracha resounded throughout the house. It was quickly followed by a shouted, “Ooh, Ooh, I got it!” from somewhere upstairs. Shrugging the group went back to discussing how to prevent future Mana power poofs.
Not to long into their discussion on special hats, they were interrupted by the distinctive thump-scrape sound of something being drug down the stairs. Turning as one the group eyed the bottom of the stairs, expecting to see Amai dragging something out in a body bag. What they saw was the upper torso and lower, um, well, fin of Toshiya as he stubbornly drug himself towards the door.
“Um, Toshiya?” Naku asked, trying to figure out why he was in a mermaid suit.
“Not light now,” he said still struggling to get his be finned body to the door, “ I answel the dool. If I don’t and he might see his shadow and lun away.”
“Eh?” Rya asked leaning towards Takai. “What is he talking about? Sounds like a ground hog.”
Turning to give Rya “the Look”, Takai noticed how close she was and quickly took a step backwards. Her doing this somehow offset Rya’s balance and she fell, landing on the floor with thud. Ignoring the now fallen Rya, Takai turned back to the door just in time to watch as Toshiya tried to open the door. Poor Toshiya was having trouble maneuvering his shiny red fin out of the way of the door. Luckily enough for him his visitor was thin enough to squeeze through the small cracked opening. As he stepped completely into the foyer the newest houseguest was greeted with a delighted cry of “Shin-Shin!” and the pleasure of having one of his band mates molest his leg.
Looking down at Toshiya, poor Shinya was unaware that he was about to be attacked by the evil Rya. That is, until he felt small jerky tugs on his curled hair, which were quickly followed by softly exclaimed ooohhs. Attempting to turn around to face his attacker, Shinya tripped over Toshiya’s fin and stumbled, causing his curls to bounce even more, much to Rya’s amusement. Finally able to stand with Toshiya still attached to his thigh, and for some strange reason he was petting his boot, Shinya faced Rya just as she was about to tug another springy curl. Noticing that she was caught, Rya gave a sheepish giggle and peered up at Shinya, trying to get a good glimpse at his eyes.
Leaning back as far as he could, Shinya looked around for the nearest exit. As luck would have it, it was currently blocked by the insatiably curious Rya.
Looking around like a deer in headlights, Shinya searched for some sort of help out of his predicament. As if sensing his band mate’s uncomfortable ness, Toshiya looked up. Upon seeing Rya invading poor Shin-Shin’s bubble, he did what any good friend would do. He attacked with his fin, knocking her onto the floor, where she landed with a squeal and a thud.
Ignoring her twitching form, Toshiya looked up, ”Come on Shin-Shin, I’ll show you to your room.” Picking up his suitcase, which magically appeared, Shinya followed the slowly dragging form of Toshiya up the stairs and out of sight.
“Well, that was that I suppose,” Takia murmured.
Rya stood at the base of the stairs with her hands on her hips, head aimed up towards the top of the steps. “Uh, how did Shinya get here?”
Mienaku let out a long sigh before replying. “Well, you can eliminate him flying here, unless Mana had a hand in it.” She then turned towards the gothic man-farie guru. “Did you?”
Mana shook his head and then turned away to also head up the stairs. Almost to the second floor, he paused without ever looking back. “Oh, and I choose to take the stairs.” Moments later left almost everyone confused, that is, all but Takai and Naku.
“Damn, he’s good,” Takai, whispered to her comrade.
“Takai, if he’s that good you do realize that he now knows that you just cussed.” Mienaku replied.
“True, Takai. Just say dang it, or darn it; like me!” Rya said now slowing slinking up the stairs. Crouched down low, as if using the side bar poles of the staircase as a wall, Rya was making her up the stairs as if the top of the railing had enclosed her into a small tunnel that only she was in. Somehow she was managing to make herself struggle to waddle up the stairs.
“Uhhh..” Gackt replied with as much wit as he could gather for the moment.
“Don’t ask,” Naku wavered off. “This is Rya in her secretive, people don’t know even though they really do, man hunt for out of curiosity’s sake.” She stops. “But I dibbed Shin-Shin. Hey Rya, the curiosity stops here!” Leaving, she goes to hinder the sneaky would-be attacker from her so-called mission.
“Ocean? Um, well, I really don’t know where we are in Mexico, but…” Takai’s voice came filtering out from down the hall. A look around the room showcases that two bodies are now missing from the room, Takai and Hyde. Gackt creeps down the hallway and stops near the doorway of the room that contains his most prized possession, beside himself, of course.
“Hmm…,” Takai’s voice floated out into the hallway. “Bad luck you say. Well, frankly I’m not buying it. Gomen. Your story is bad piss. And I hope the magical faire of stupendous hearing heard that because I’m sounding like flopp’n retarded reject from the era of no return.”
“Eh?” Hyde’s voice spoke for the confused look on his face that Gackt couldn’t see.
“Yea, uh, about that, forget that. Can Mana bless them with something? I don’t think he’s religious, but if I fetch Gackt’s little wiener dog and throw a sombrero on of its head, can Mana use that somehow?”
“Don tink so.”
“You’re probably right. How does putting salt in the toilet and flushing the keys down one by one sound Hyde?”
Upon hearing the word “keys” Gackt round the corner into the room at top sumo speed. He immediately glares from the half destroyed piano to the two piano pedophilers. The two try to quickly hide the confiscated pieces, but being too late caused Gackt to then try to chase them both down, and for them, to run, duck, and fail away like crazy as never before seen.
Mexican Ramen
Chapter 2
The next morning after everyone had taken turns cleaning up the mess Gackt had unwittingly created the night before, they all stood in the living trying to decide what to do about Gackt’s temporarily broken fingers.
“I did what again?” Gackt sat on the couch staring at his hands that had been wrapped up with layers of cut up Strawberry Short Cake sheets.
“Well, fust you did something like this,” Toshiya said. He gave out a sour sounding battle cry and poorly imitated Gackt’s master-like fighting skills. “Then, with eyes still not open, this.” He then began to attack and kick out at the built-in pueblo-looking bookshelf nearest to him. Somewhere around then is when everyone just sort of started tuning him out.
Rya suddenly notices the sheets that Gackt’s hand is wrapped up in and comes closer to him for inspection. “Hey, I have sheets like that too. Where’d you get yours from?”
Gackt’s eyes meet Rya’s, then to Takai’s. “Umm… I all my sheets are silk or satin.”
Rya reaches her hand out and touches the material. “But this is cotton.”
In the background Takai is slowly sneaking away. Everyone notices except for Rya and the still fighting maniac, Toshiya. Gackt sighs and hangs his head.
Mienaku polishes off the remainder of her coffee and slams it down on the Korean import coffee table. What was supposed to be a dramatic sound effect actually tuned into a horrible wood-smashing sound, as the table collapsed upon itself. “Oops,” she said with a shrug. “Toshiya, please don’t buy junk from some vendor who dresses up like a giant hotdog named Taco Bob anymore.”
Toshiya, who incidentally had dressed up as a boxer today, is now adding in special moves for “fighting” the bookshelf. He acknowledges Naku with a simple ‘Hai’, and then ducks his head down as if the bookshelf had just swung back at him.
Mienaku, who had been temporarily engrossed with Toshiya’s fighting, shook herself out of it. “Okay, well, what bothers me is about how often this is going to happen. Do you always sleep walk and hurt yourself?”
Gackt looks to the ceiling for a moment or two before replying. “ I don’t know.” His eyes then cringe. “Oh, I have an itch. I can’t touch me.” Looking awkward, he starts rubbing his back on the couch.
A fast pace thudding drew nearer as Takai runs back into the room. “Oh! Let me help!” Diving onto to couch she slashes out her claws and begins to back rape Gackt with her razor talons.
Rya, who had found safety under the couch from the form of the previous flying Takai, peeks her head out. “Don’t be greedy, Tai.”
“Yea,” chimed in Mienaku. “We can take turns. I dib Monday through Friday!”
Takai’s mouth drops down. “You hoe! No way in hell!”
Turning her head slightly to the side, Mienaku smiles sweetly. “ Awe, such talk like that will make those wrinkles in your face so much worse.” She turns away to talk to Gackt who is wondering what they are dibbing.
Toshiya stops boxing and walks over to Rya. After a second she notices that he is now sporting a nurse outfit. “Ooh. That was a nifty trick,” she replied with a wink. “You gotta teach me that one sometime.”
Smiling back at her he whispered, “Rya, didn’t you want a day?”
“Nah,” she whispered back. “I’ll just sneak in at night when they’re sleeping,” she said with an evil smile on her face and tapping the tips of her fingers together.
“Rya! Double dosage now,” Takai commanded with one palm held out.
Rya trots up to Takai with a syringe full of a dark caffeine serum and wearing a nurse outfit. Takai catches a glimpse of the outfit from the corner of her eye and does a double take. She looks over Rya’s new getup and then glances to Toshiya who is wearing now Rya’s clothes. “That was quick.”
“What was?” Amai appears from out of nowhere and soon leaves to go measure Toshiya’s waist, height, etc. She says nothing to him as she does this and Toshiya, who must have thought that this was a new game, starts giving her new ideas of what else she can measure.
“Oh! Measule how fal it is flom my ear to my knee.” Toshiya exclaimed with a little too much joy.
Takia rolls her eyes and then turns back to her original objective, Naku, with syringe in hand. She squirts a little bit of it into the air to see if it’s good to go. Silently, she stalks over to Naku.
“So, you dibbed me, light?” Gackt meant ‘right’, but that’s Japanese Engrish for you.
Before Mienaku, or Naku, or Miku, what ever you want to call her, could answer, Takai plunged the syringe into Naku’s neck. Now, most people would have noticed something like this, but Naku had been hyped up on taking this crap for so long that a swarm of twelve-foot mosquitoes could have attacked her and sucked her dry without her noticing. In fact, afterwards, if she didn’t notice the huge holes in her skin, she would probably wonder why she felt so funny.
Stepping back, Takai tosses the syringe behind her, which makes a thud sound, followed by a girlie scream. Looking back, she sees the syringe sticking into the wall right next to Toshiya, who is checking his side and laughing now.
“It missted me Yeesss! Yeesss!” Toshiya sang performing his celebratory ‘yes’ victory dance.
Rya watched Toshiya for a second longer before deciding to mimic the dance. Unfortunately, no sooner had she grasped the dance did she end up slipping on some caffeine sprinkles on the floor. This catches Naku and Gackt’s attention, but before they can turn around to look, Takai dives onto the floor next to Rya and shoves her over to the side.
“What was that?” Mienaku asks.
Trying to look her part, Takai replies, “I was so devastated about you being unfair and getting Monday through Friday, well, I guess I fell in broken heartedness.”
Looking puzzled, Gackt gestures towards Rya and asks, “How did Rya get on the floor?”
Grabbing Rya’s shoulders, Takai pulls her close to her. “She shares my pain.” Rya rubs fiercely at her elbows and gives Takai “the look”.
Mienaku narrows her eyes at Takai. “Fine. Even though I know you’re probably lying…” She pauses to look around. “…About something…” Stretching out the sentence, you could tell that she was buying time to think of something, but in the end, she ended up shrugging and finally let the thought go. “I’m in a good mood, so I’ll give you one more day. But that still gives me one more than you.”
Hearing a low, drawn out moan, everyone turns his or her attention back to Gackt. “I hope my hands heal soon. I wanna be the one who touches myself.”
“I know of someone that can heal you, su-pa saiyan fast!” Toshiya exclaimed, throwing his pointer finger towards the sky.
“A doctor?” Rya wondered.
“Duh, what else. A faerie?” Mienaku lashed back with her arms crossed.
Toshiya turned his head back to see Mienaku. “Actually yes!” The lights then dramatically turned off, thanks to side effects by Rya. “You see, in Japan, there is a myth of a mystical, magical farie that can heal you if you only believe in him,” he says in his most dead sexy voice. Suddenly changing moods from sexy to ultra perky, he adds, “Should I call him?”
“Please, burst your bubble away.” Takai added in her most sweet voice.
Two hours later, or in Naku’s time, 12 cups of coffee later, the Mexican doorbell sounded off to “la cucaracha”. Toshiya answers the door, this time in a maid’s outfit. Upon opening the door, his outfit is almost perfectly imitated by the woman- man- woman-man- woman-man standing in front of him. Toshiya flings the door wide open and embraces the gothic dressed maid before him.
Meanwhile, caught by the attention of the Mexican doorbell, everyone stampedes to the front door to see whom it is, with the exception of pissy Takai, taking up the rear.
The beautiful man with a hint of smile attempts to make a decent, slight bow with Toshiya still clinging to him. Gackt suddenly intervenes and asks Toshiya politely in Japanese to give Mana-sama some air. (How everyone understood that, is unknown. Perhaps it was some of that good ‘ol Mana magic.)
Toshiya, still grinning from ear to ear, backed up.
“Ohhh. He’s pretty.” Rya turned to look around the group with a pathetic pouty face. “Can I keep him?”
Mienaku hits Rya over the head with a rolled up newspaper. “No.”
Rya snapped her fingers together. “Drats. Well, you can’t blame me for trying.”
“But I can.” Amai says with a quick laugh in Rya’s face. Rya jumped back in surprise and fear. Surprise because Amai appeared from out of nowhere and fear from the expression on her face. Somehow Amai had managed to smile, look pissed, and yet happy about it all, in a not so friendly way. No one could blame Rya for her reaction for no one could ever figure Amai out. For Christmas the whole group was planning on putting together whatever pesos they could to get her a proper straight jacket. One she wouldn’t be able to escape from.
“Agghh! Don’t do that,” Rya cried standing on one leg with her hands clutched near her face.
A small giggle from Mana brought everyone back to their guest. Without trying, Mana had just won everyone over by that lace-gloved hand covering his mouth from his tiny giggle.
Rya sighed. “That was beautiful,” she said as if it was love at first sight. “Yea! So many bishonen all in one house now!” Again she clutched her hands together near her face, but this time with a dreamy expression.
“Mine!” Amai practically spat out loud to the group. Now standing next to Mana, she just stood there with a crazy look on her face and made tiny chuckles to herself.
Mienaku was the first one to comment. “Is that the letter ‘A’ on your forehead?” She asked Mana in disbelief.
Amai hid the marker behind her back as fast as she could, but not before Gackt got a good glimpse of it. “It’s pelimanent!” He exclaimed.
“Peli-what?” Rya asked scratching her head.
“Permanent. They can’t say their ‘r’s,” Takai informed sighing, having said this many moons before.
Mana’s eyes averted upward as he took his gloved hand and wiped it across his forehead. He then brought his glove back to look at it. His face was puzzled and most of us knew why. Not only does a black glove not show a black mark, it just so happens that permanent marker doesn’t come off. O, may he have fun with that and may Amai be blessed with the ability of running faster than Gackt can do his convulsion dance.
Surprisingly, without turning the bowels of hell rage on Amai, Mana simply turned his head to look at her. But it was too late. Faster than anyone could track, Amai had quite easily mastered the technique of vanishing into the air, some strange universe, or maybe even the underskirts of Mana’s dress. No one really knew.
“What the hell,” Takai remarked.
Everyone bustled around then trying to help. Mana was shown his new quarters, then Toshiya and Gackt offered their advise on how to get the mark off, seeing that they wore and knew more about makeup more than the girls. Yes, sad, but true. Mienaku offered to make dinner, seeing how no one wanted to wait around for Gackt’s four day cooking. And as healthy sounding as Butabara sounds, it may be oh so magically delicious, just not as much for those with heart problems. After dinner, Magical Farie Mana gave his first rule to be followed to heal Gackt.
Gackt was sitting on the couch, in his normal pose with legs spread in an ‘I don’t give a damn’ way or ‘world, look at the package I’m packing’ way. Either way, he looked almost comfortable, that is if you ignored the huge strawberry Short Cake mittens. Rya and Mienaku were on either side of Gackt, already offering their services to help touch him. Rya had an arm, and Naku, oddly enough a shin. Toshiya sat in the middle of the room in an over-sized Santa outfit, playing with two boxing battle robots. Meanwhile, Takai sat on the couch opposite of the other, with her feet up, taking up the whole couch and Mana stood in the front of the room before them all with a mark of an A surrounded by a freshly scrubbed, red skin.
“First rule,” Mana said saying his ‘r’ perfectly. “There will be no smoking in the home.”
Gackt scowled. Toshiya looked up, still playing, but the silence extended until the head of one of the robots popped up.
“Nani?!?!” Gackt said with a held rage. “Nan de yo, baka yaro?” Translation: What is this, stupid bastard? To us non-smokers, this first rule made Mana almost god-like for trying to save our poor, dying lungs.
“Second rule,” Mana continued. “Swearing will not be tolerated.”
“Shit,” Takai said under her breath. It escaped all but Magical Faerie Mana’s very magical hearing, as he soon turned his attention towards her. Takai’s eyes widened in surprise at his hearing. “Uh, I wasn’t finished. I was going to say Shitake.”
Rya apparently thought the whole situation was very funny and not only ended up sharing her laughter, but a tiny friend that squeaked out as well. Upon this accident, she quickly stomped her foot down on the ground. Still laughing she replied in between breaths, “Sorry, frog.”
Gackt glanced at her, not really sure what just happened or what was so humorous.
Mexican Ramen
Chapter 3
Later that day, the sound of la cucaracha sounded through the house, quickly followed by the thumping sounds of someone running.
As she dashed into the living room, Rya caught sight of Mana standing in front of the Mexican fireplace. Quickly trying to halt her mad dash for the door, or at least slow it down, she ended up tripping over her own feet and landing face down in front of the door.
“I got it!” Takai cried, as she stepped over the limp form of Rya. Opening the door she froze, staring at whomever it was outside. Blinking a couple of times, she closed the door. Turning, she faced the others who were now standing in the living room, watching her.
“Well?” Mienaku asked. “Who is it?”
Glaring at each of her roommates in turn, Takai finally asked, “ Who the hel-“ She cut herself off as she caught a glimpse of Mystical Mana in the corner of her eye. Rephrasing her question she continued, “heck ordered pizza from some greasy Mexican?”
Staring at Takai with a confused look on his face Gackt asked, “Pizza? Greasy Mexican?” Smiling suddenly as he understood what Takai was saying, Gackt reached for the door. He fumbled with the door trying to get it to open but soon slumped in defeat when his Strawberry Shortcake wrapped hands couldn’t grip the knob. Gackt finally turned towards Mana.
As if he understood what poor little Gackuto needed, maybe it’s that faerie magic; Mana reached past both Takai and Gackt and opened the door.
Standing on the other side of the door was a slightly fuming, um well, lets just say it looked like a pissed off Mexican with a pizza.
At Gackt’s exclaimed, “Hyde!” Takai removed herself from the doorway so that the greasy Mexican, uh we mean Hyde, could enter.
“Okurete gomen ne.” Hyde apologized as he forgot his anger upon seeing Gackt. Hyde gave his friend one of his most dashing smiles that seemed to transform his face and then embraced his long time buddy from Japan.
“Don’t be sorry for being late,” Mana said from behind the group. “Just pretend that time doesn’t exist.”
Rya looked up from her once face planted position from the ground. “Huh? Did I hear that right?”
Mienaku leaned down towards Rya and lowered her voice. “I think he’s going by his faery time.”
“Ohhhhh….” Rya looked at Naku for a second longer then spat out “Okies,” before once again dropping her face into the ground.
The thud sound brought Gackt’s attention back to his roommates as he then began to introduce them. He first introduced the form of Rya on the ground as the unexplainable one, as she replied with a Boy Scout salute into the air, Mienaku, with nerves of steal with the help of caffeine, Mana as the magical farie that could heal him, Takai, the ever pissy one, Amai, the one to be careful of, and Toshiya, the ever happy carefree one of the group.
He gave a curtsey bow and then stopped when his eyes saw Takai, who was looking at the ceiling at if there could possible be something of interest tattooed there, for only her to see. “Were you referring to me as a greasy Mexican?”
All eyes were on Takai as they waited for a response. Finally, she just shrugged it off and finally met his gaze. “Uh, I didn’t mean bad greasy. Greasy can be good,” Takai said improvising as she went along. “You remember Grease Lightning? Well, if not, lets just say it was the healthy kind of greasy that wouldn’t have aged John Travolta as bad as he is today.”
Mienaku let out a long low whistle. “That statement had to hurt.”
Takai tried to once again explain herself, but one by one, people stopped listening and walked away. In the end, she was left trying to explain herself to Mana. After a few minutes that she finally gave up as well and left to go work on a project in her room.
Thirty minutes or so into a picture that she was creating of a not so G-rated Gackt and a slip and slide, Takai postponed her computer-generated art at the sound of Hyde’s voice. “…and here you would think it would be soft, but it’s not, instead it’s hard.”
Takai stood up and peered around her room. Upon seeing no one she begrudgingly sighed. “Why do I hear Hyde?”
“…yet here you would think that it would be hard and its soft…”
Sounding as if the voice was nearby, Takai searched her room but found not one single shred of the Japanese-looking Hispanic. Shrugging it off, she then went back to coloring her character.
“..and here it should be rough. Instead it’s smooth, almost too smooth, as if there’s no texture at all.”
Her hand freezing over the mouse, Takai stopped her adjustments on her artwork as Hyde’s voice once again echoed throughout her room. Looking around, she expected to find him standing behind her, critiquing her coloring as she worked. Finding nothing, she went back to fixing her characters left pants leg.
“..here it’s so flat-“
Screaming in frustration, Takai jumped from her chair and did another quick search of her room. Coming back to her desk, she eyed her coffee cup. She hadn’t made the coffee today, Naku had. Remembering previous experiments her crazy roommate had attempted with food, she fled from her room in search of her caffeine fiend friend.
Takai pauses in the hallway as something in the bathroom catches her attention. Going back she looks inside to find Rya with her head practically in the toilet bowl, screaming Hyde’s name.
Clearing her throat, Takai watches in amusement as Rya jumps. Startled, she drops the toilet seat on her head. Spinning, Rya turns to face Takai in the doorway as she rubs her head.
“What are you doing?” Takai asks.
“Looking for Hyde,” Rya states as if it should have been obvious just by watching her.
“And why,” Takai ask one eyebrow raised, “would he be in the toilet?”
“Well,” Rya starts staring at her feet, “he wasn’t under the couch, or in the fridge, or in the closet, and I know sometimes I fall in the toilet. So, I thought maybe he had fallen in and couldn’t get out. I mean I could hear him but not see him.” Still looking at her feet she asks, “Where else was I suppose to look?”
Waiting a few minutes, Rya looks up, expecting the doorway to be empty. Upon seeing Takai still standing in the doorway, a stupefied expression on her face, she asks, “Um, Takai?”
Suddenly snapped out of it, Takai asks, “Did you have any coffee this morning?”
“I don’t like coffee. Remember?” Rya answers.
“Just checking.” Takai says as she walks out of the doorway.
Coming into the living room she finds what looks like the ass of a giant rabbit sticking out from under the couch.
Walking around to the backside of the couch, she sees Toshiya with a sucker in his mouth playing with a Tonka truck.
“Uh, Toshiya?”
Looking up at her he grins. “Hey, Takai, look at this!” Taking the sucker he holds it up for her viewing pleasure. “Someone left this under the couch, and it’s watermelon!”
“Um, that’s great!” Takai states, stressing the great, “but what are you doing under the couch?”
“Well,” Toshiya starts as he pushes his truck around making little ‘vroom, vroom’ noises, “I was looking for Hyde, but I couldn’t find him.” Frowning he scrunched up his nose. “But look what else I found,” he exclaimed, grinning again as he showed Takai his Tonka truck.
“Great!” Takai said. Looking around the living room she asked Toshiya, “Have you seen Naku lately?”
“Nope,” he said between ‘vroom vrooms’,”but I can tell you she’s not under the couch.” Rolling her eyes, Takai muttered, “Thanks,” as she walked out of the living room.
Heading for the kitchen she stopped as she once again heard Hyde’s voice echoing throughout the house. “Do you have to remove your pants?” Looking around, Takai still doesn’t see him.
Entering the kitchen, she stops in front of the fridge. Feeling slightly foolish she opens it. Upon finding no Hyde, and no food she closes it, muttering to herself about stupidity.
Turning around, she finds Mienaku standing in the doorway, staring at her.
“Please tell me that you hear Hyde too, and that it’s not the coffee.”
Staring at her roommate for a moment longer, Takai answers, “ I hear Hyde too and it’s not the coffee.”
Sighing in relief, Mienaku heads for the coffee pot. After refilling her mug, she asks, “So where do you think he is?”
Not really listening, Takai answers, “Well he’s not under the couch, in the fridge, or in the toilet.”
Trying not to choke on her coffee, Mienaku puts her hand on Takai’s forehead. “Well you don’t seem to have a fever.”
Snapping out of her daze, Takai smacks Mienaku’s hand from head, almost causing her to spill her precious coffee.
“Agghh! You hit me, you bitch! I’m gonna tell Mystical Mana on you!”
Shrugging, Takai stated, “Fine then, I’ll tell him that you cussed,”
As Hyde’s voice echoed throughout the kitchen, followed by a faint fermented goat cheese scent, both girls looked at each other.
Walking from the kitchen, Takai stormed through the halls opening all the doors and looking in. Naku quickly followed her, mug in hand.
As they came to the last of the 27 rooms, Takai turned the knob, only to find it locked. Looking at Naku, she motions her closer to the door. As both girls press their ears to the door they could hear Gackt and Hyde’s voices from within.
A muttered, “Bingo!” from Takai startles Naku into dropping her coffee. As they both reach for the mug of hot java, they bump heads and crash against the door, knocking it open.
Looking up from their positions on the now open room’s floor, they find a nearly naked Gackt and a blindfolded Hyde standing before them.
Blushing, Takai tries to scuttle from the room. Meanwhile, Mienaku was getting comfy on the floor sipping at the remaining coffee in her mug. “Please,” she says, whipping a camcorder from thin air, “continue.”
Pulling down his blindfold as he hears someone other than Gackt, Hyde looks around. Upon seeing Mienaku on the floor with a camcorder in her hand he turns to Gackt. “Has she been here the whole-” Finally registering Gackt’s near nudity, Hyde stammers off.
“Ah,” Mienaku states sadly, “it seems playtime with ‘junior’ is over.” Stashing her camcorder back in its hideaway, she gets up from the floor. “And I only just got here.” Still sipping at her coffee she walks towards the door. Halfway there, she grabs Takai, who was still trying to stealthily escape. As she exited, embarrassed roommate in toll, she closes the door behind her.
Takai heads back to her room wanting to finish her project but stops at the sound of a sneeze. She slowly stops and turns around only to find that no one is behind her. She shrugs it off and heads back to her room. At her doorstep, hand on the knob, she hears somebody blowing their nose, soon followed a minute after by the sound of a liquid making a huge drop into another liquid substance. Takai’s face slightly contorts as she realizes that not only can she still hear Hyde, but now everything that he does as well. Take now for example. Hyde was probably taken a good ‘ol pisser into that freeze your ass off until goose bumps populate your ass from that hell and damnation freaking cold ceramic bowl that Rya had planted her face in just moments ago. What a peachy thought.
“Naku!” Takai yelled down the hall.
Moments later fast foots steps could be heard pummeling the wooden floors at a rapid pace.
“Hold on a moment!” Mienaku yelled back as she barely rounded the corner without smashing her running form into the wall. She slowed to a bare stop in front of Takai, her socks sliding on the almost glassy floor. She had to catch her balance before finally looking at Takai.
“No wait,” Mienaku said waving her hands apart in the air as she spoke. “You hear Hyde take a wiz.”
Takai backed away from her door. “Good, you heard it too then.”
“Well, duh, I was listening in on the bathroom door with Rya and Toshiya.”
“What???” Takai replied half shocked.
“Yea, I was surprised too that Toshiya wanted to listen in.” Mienaku shrugged. “I guess he thought it was some sort of game and he didn’t want to be left out.”
“Umm. Okay. But what I really meant was.. was…” Takai stops and looks up to the ceiling.
Naku laughs and points at Takai. “You forgot what you were going to say, didn’t you?”
Giving Naku “the look” slows Naku down to the occasional chuckle. “Dammit! I knew what I was going to say, but your comment just threw me way off. So, uh… So dammit!”
“You were talking about hearing Hyde pee.” Mienaku stopped for a second. “No wait, you weren’t there. How did you hear him?”
“Ah! Thank you! That was my point. We can still hear Hy..” The sound of Hyde’s voice cut through then, silencing the house. “NANI???!!!??”
“To the downstairs main living facility of the pueblo!” Mienaku sounded off to the tune of Batman going to the bat cave.
The two then proceeded to the new secret elevator that Gackt had found by accident one day. Only the three of them knew about it, and none were about to share its location. If the others wanted to know about it, they had to discover it as well. One of the coolest attributes of the elevator was that it was built into the wall that looked like a giant and intricate mirror piece, straight down four flights. This way, others could not see in, or even know about it, when the passengers onboard could see clearly out as if the wall was glass. Funny thing was, it was on the opposite side of where the stairs were.
Mienaku chuckled as she pointed at the form of Rya hurdling herself madly down the four flights of steps. “Ahh, poor Rya. We gotta tell her about his thing one day. If she breaks her neck running like that, from whom would I get my daily laugh?” She looks at Takai. “Oh, never mind. You’re here.” Naku smiled sweetly.
“Yea, yea, choke it up. It wouldn’t be my fault if one day something accidentally slipped into your coffee that knocks you out. Beware: you may find yourself strapped to the bottom of an air plane one day..” Takai’s sentence and thoughts trailed off as she began to laugh, pointing to the stairs.
Mienaku followed her finger to the form of Gackt running one floor behind Rya, just as madly as she was. Only maybe a little faster. It was kinda scary how fast that boy could really high tail it when need be. Sad thing was, he knew about the elevator. He was the one who found it.
By the time that Rya and Gackt had both reached the bottom floor, Mienaku and Takai were there in the middle if the space, between the elevator and the stairs, still busting a stitch over having seen Gackt use the stairs.
“What’s so funny?” Rya stopped to ask them as Gackt kept his speedway to the living room.
“Stairs..” Takia squeezed out in between breaths. Rya looked back and forth, confused, and scratched her head before finally shrugging and running off to catch up with Gackt.
“Demo..naze?” Hyde’s voice once again spoke.
Mienaku and Takai finally dragged themselves to the living room, wiping their eyes from the tears that had leaked out during their hysteric epidemic. The only personage that was absent was Toshiya and Amai, who may or may not show up at the speed of lightning, depending upon how much like gold she was following Mana’s rule.
“Let me get his straight,” Rya stated to Mana from a few feet away. “So you’re telling us that your powers sometimes tend to flux, depending on how many people are around you, and that is why we can all hear Hyde?”
“Yes, and no” Mana said shaking his head with a tiny sigh. “I’m afraid it has spread.”
“But we have only heard Hyde so far.” Mienaku said as she sat down on the couch next to Gackt.
“Incorrect. I believe that you also heard… myself, using the restroom.”
Everyone’s jaw dropped and Mienaku let out a low whistle.
“But not to worry,” Mana continued. “So far it is only the two of us..”
The sound of a light scratch was heard in the same way that everyone had heard Hyde talk and Mana…pee. Everyone turned their heads as the noise continued and left Gackt as the main spotlight of attention. He apparently was the only one unaware of this fact, seeing as how he was still attempting to scratch an itch with his wrapped up hands.
Mana continued once again, but in a heavier voice. “…make that now three of us.”
Gackt’s head rose at that. “Whose the ta-lurd?” Note: this is suppose to third, not ta-lurd, but why try to correct him? Wasn’t watching him try to scratch himself precious enough to make up for it?
“Don’t look at me,” Rya kicked in. “If I was the turd, you would know it.”
“Rya. Do this for me: Shhhh… Shhhhhhh….” Mienaku demonstrated by putting her finger up to her lips.
Before Rya could even begin to think of a retort the sound of la cucaracha resounded throughout the house. It was quickly followed by a shouted, “Ooh, Ooh, I got it!” from somewhere upstairs. Shrugging the group went back to discussing how to prevent future Mana power poofs.
Not to long into their discussion on special hats, they were interrupted by the distinctive thump-scrape sound of something being drug down the stairs. Turning as one the group eyed the bottom of the stairs, expecting to see Amai dragging something out in a body bag. What they saw was the upper torso and lower, um, well, fin of Toshiya as he stubbornly drug himself towards the door.
“Um, Toshiya?” Naku asked, trying to figure out why he was in a mermaid suit.
“Not light now,” he said still struggling to get his be finned body to the door, “ I answel the dool. If I don’t and he might see his shadow and lun away.”
“Eh?” Rya asked leaning towards Takai. “What is he talking about? Sounds like a ground hog.”
Turning to give Rya “the Look”, Takai noticed how close she was and quickly took a step backwards. Her doing this somehow offset Rya’s balance and she fell, landing on the floor with thud. Ignoring the now fallen Rya, Takai turned back to the door just in time to watch as Toshiya tried to open the door. Poor Toshiya was having trouble maneuvering his shiny red fin out of the way of the door. Luckily enough for him his visitor was thin enough to squeeze through the small cracked opening. As he stepped completely into the foyer the newest houseguest was greeted with a delighted cry of “Shin-Shin!” and the pleasure of having one of his band mates molest his leg.
Looking down at Toshiya, poor Shinya was unaware that he was about to be attacked by the evil Rya. That is, until he felt small jerky tugs on his curled hair, which were quickly followed by softly exclaimed ooohhs. Attempting to turn around to face his attacker, Shinya tripped over Toshiya’s fin and stumbled, causing his curls to bounce even more, much to Rya’s amusement. Finally able to stand with Toshiya still attached to his thigh, and for some strange reason he was petting his boot, Shinya faced Rya just as she was about to tug another springy curl. Noticing that she was caught, Rya gave a sheepish giggle and peered up at Shinya, trying to get a good glimpse at his eyes.
Leaning back as far as he could, Shinya looked around for the nearest exit. As luck would have it, it was currently blocked by the insatiably curious Rya.
Looking around like a deer in headlights, Shinya searched for some sort of help out of his predicament. As if sensing his band mate’s uncomfortable ness, Toshiya looked up. Upon seeing Rya invading poor Shin-Shin’s bubble, he did what any good friend would do. He attacked with his fin, knocking her onto the floor, where she landed with a squeal and a thud.
Ignoring her twitching form, Toshiya looked up, ”Come on Shin-Shin, I’ll show you to your room.” Picking up his suitcase, which magically appeared, Shinya followed the slowly dragging form of Toshiya up the stairs and out of sight.
“Well, that was that I suppose,” Takia murmured.
Rya stood at the base of the stairs with her hands on her hips, head aimed up towards the top of the steps. “Uh, how did Shinya get here?”
Mienaku let out a long sigh before replying. “Well, you can eliminate him flying here, unless Mana had a hand in it.” She then turned towards the gothic man-farie guru. “Did you?”
Mana shook his head and then turned away to also head up the stairs. Almost to the second floor, he paused without ever looking back. “Oh, and I choose to take the stairs.” Moments later left almost everyone confused, that is, all but Takai and Naku.
“Damn, he’s good,” Takai, whispered to her comrade.
“Takai, if he’s that good you do realize that he now knows that you just cussed.” Mienaku replied.
“True, Takai. Just say dang it, or darn it; like me!” Rya said now slowing slinking up the stairs. Crouched down low, as if using the side bar poles of the staircase as a wall, Rya was making her up the stairs as if the top of the railing had enclosed her into a small tunnel that only she was in. Somehow she was managing to make herself struggle to waddle up the stairs.
“Uhhh..” Gackt replied with as much wit as he could gather for the moment.
“Don’t ask,” Naku wavered off. “This is Rya in her secretive, people don’t know even though they really do, man hunt for out of curiosity’s sake.” She stops. “But I dibbed Shin-Shin. Hey Rya, the curiosity stops here!” Leaving, she goes to hinder the sneaky would-be attacker from her so-called mission.
“Ocean? Um, well, I really don’t know where we are in Mexico, but…” Takai’s voice came filtering out from down the hall. A look around the room showcases that two bodies are now missing from the room, Takai and Hyde. Gackt creeps down the hallway and stops near the doorway of the room that contains his most prized possession, beside himself, of course.
“Hmm…,” Takai’s voice floated out into the hallway. “Bad luck you say. Well, frankly I’m not buying it. Gomen. Your story is bad piss. And I hope the magical faire of stupendous hearing heard that because I’m sounding like flopp’n retarded reject from the era of no return.”
“Eh?” Hyde’s voice spoke for the confused look on his face that Gackt couldn’t see.
“Yea, uh, about that, forget that. Can Mana bless them with something? I don’t think he’s religious, but if I fetch Gackt’s little wiener dog and throw a sombrero on of its head, can Mana use that somehow?”
“Don tink so.”
“You’re probably right. How does putting salt in the toilet and flushing the keys down one by one sound Hyde?”
Upon hearing the word “keys” Gackt round the corner into the room at top sumo speed. He immediately glares from the half destroyed piano to the two piano pedophilers. The two try to quickly hide the confiscated pieces, but being too late caused Gackt to then try to chase them both down, and for them, to run, duck, and fail away like crazy as never before seen.