(to carry our love away)
i wonder what i would write about once i get into a place in my life where im completely content. i guess the idealistic rationality that one day, i could possibly, be content with my life and the world... that will be a dark day in history. i guess there's a difference between self-righteous contentment and happiness - it's a fine line that often teeters precariously over on a border. one way, the other way. i mean, i was having this conversation with someone who will remain unnamed.. i wonder if you can be a genuinely happy person but still realize the worlds problems (and that there are problems). i often question that myself - if that the persuit of happiness won't ever be attained because my critical and progressive eye is always at flex. maybe just something to talk about. or maybe, it's the fact that when i get out of school and i start creating my own life, i'll have something of some real importance to say.
i have my show on thursday, 40 minute set. i don't know half the songs i'm playing. im nervous. i figure that if i attach myself to my conviction, i'll be able to create something that might not be lovely, but will end up being beautiful. isn't that what we're looking for? is it possible to be completely ugly but still attain a certain grace and beauty. you think? maybe i'm just finding ways to justify my own fears. either way, i will probably get nervous. but no one is really paying attention to me anyways. i want to play guitar but im at school until i leave for the alexisonfire concert. doing nothing. twiddling. hopefully i'll get to record some. but it's all up in the air. we'll see what happens. hopefully i'll get some tunes out there.
thanks for listening to me whine, i really appreciate all the support that people i've never met before gives me. it's such a reassurance that i could, possibly on my own, be fine in this huge world. and maybe that the idealisms of a first draft gesture drawing outline can grow some detail along the way.
i have my show on thursday, 40 minute set. i don't know half the songs i'm playing. im nervous. i figure that if i attach myself to my conviction, i'll be able to create something that might not be lovely, but will end up being beautiful. isn't that what we're looking for? is it possible to be completely ugly but still attain a certain grace and beauty. you think? maybe i'm just finding ways to justify my own fears. either way, i will probably get nervous. but no one is really paying attention to me anyways. i want to play guitar but im at school until i leave for the alexisonfire concert. doing nothing. twiddling. hopefully i'll get to record some. but it's all up in the air. we'll see what happens. hopefully i'll get some tunes out there.
thanks for listening to me whine, i really appreciate all the support that people i've never met before gives me. it's such a reassurance that i could, possibly on my own, be fine in this huge world. and maybe that the idealisms of a first draft gesture drawing outline can grow some detail along the way.