FFXII ficlet.
Vayne does not look for gifts from his brother. Rather, he would run from such gifts. Sometimes, though, he has no chance to run. Pre-game, vague spoilers for House Solidor.
No One's Kit
At eleven Vayne was, in comparison with other members of his family, a most unfortunate child. His eldest brother, Isont, took after their father, from his stern mouth to his wry sense of humor. Teilo was luckier still, taking after their mother in more ways than not. The Senate was fond of Isont, and the women of the court found favor in Teilo, and neither was much disliked by any.
Vayne, on the most unfortunate side, gained the unlikeable parts of both mother and father. He was thin and gangly, with a face that still had much growing before it could be seen as anything approaching handsome. His humor was sour, if ever present, and his moods were more often than not approaching the apathetic.
His mother viewed him with a mild disinterest, with an occasional flash of curiousity on how, exactly, she had begat such an unlikely creature. His father paid him little mind, other than the occasion conversation with Vayne's tutors. Vayne's elder brothers would, at times, remember that they indeed had a younger brother, and at times, they would even go so far as to visit Vayne's rooms.
Vayne, however, was not a cheerful child, nor a child set for much playing. He was hard to tease, harder to please, and, all in all, was a difficult, sullen, tiring thing.
Not even his nurse liked him, if rumors were to be believed.
x
"Vayne," Teilo said, a smile on his face that told Vayne that his best chance was to run for his nurse.
"Vayne," Teilo said again, arm slung around Vayne's shoulders, and Vayne wished that his legs were just a little longer than his brother's. "Vayne, I've a gift for you."
"I can't," Vayne said, "have a gift. My tutor, he said I must work on my numbers, and Mother--"
"Vayne," Teilo sang as they walked out the door, Teilo's footsteps practically skipping out on the tiles. Vayne tried to drag his feet, but Teilo was much stronger than Vayne, and much bigger, too, and Vayne was sure that, if Teilo was hard-pressed, he'd be able to drag about even Judge Bergan. "Trust me, Vayne. Don't you trust your elder brothers?"
If, in that moment, Vayne were a bit braver than his eleven years permitted, he would have said that, no, he did not trust his elder brothers. Indeed, he would trust most anyone with the exception of his elder brothers. After all, it was his elder brothers, Teilo in particular, that seemed to trick Vayne into the many scrapes for which his nurse scolded him. Judge Drace still hadn't forgiven him, and Vayne hadn't even been near her underthings.
"Yes, Brother," Vayne said, with as world-weary a tone a child could convey, and Teilo's steps moved along just a little brighter.
The lower courtyards were far wilder than the upper courtyards, since the Empress could be little bothered to travel so many stairs. Since the Empress seldomly paid the gardens much mind, the servants paid the gardens just as little mind, and the yards became places for the boys to play. The bushes overgrew their fences, twisting and twining until they overshadowed the fountains, dropping petals into the slowly moving water.
In a far corner of the westernmost yard on the seventh level, there was a particular hole that Teilo graced with his games. This hole, in particular, was one that Vayne learned, at a very young age, to avoid with all his might. The bushes hid it well from windows that might overlook the garden, and in this dark little hole, Teilo hid spiders and snakes and pretty little maids, all in a row.
This was the exact hole that Teilo was currently leading Vayne to.
"My numbers," Vayne said, already feeling spider-legs on the back of his neck, "are very poor. Father is most displeased, and if my tutor notices me missing, Father will certainly--"
There was something moving in the bushes.
It wasn't that Vayne screamed, for he did not scream. He had learned, at the tender age of seven, that screaming made Teilo laugh all the harder. Instead, Vayne made little gasping noises, and he would pale to a most becoming shade.
The dirt was soggy around Vayne's fingernails, and Teilo's arm was still slung over his neck, hot and heavy.
"For you, little brother," Teilo said, and he sounded as though he was laughing. "A little lost kit for our little lost brother."
x
The couerl was hidden in Vayne's old playroom for the first few weeks. Teilo was gone on another campaign, dressed in silver and platinum, and the palace was slowly restricted. There were rumors of a war on the horizon, and Vayne was kept to his rooms all the more, out of the footsteps of hurrying judges and harrying senators.
Vayne took to his studies, and took to his rooms, and would watch Archadia outside his windows. At times, Bergan would come in with a missive from Isont, or Father, or sometimes, rarely, Teilo. Vayne's marks improved, though his tutor still said he was more hopeless than not, and Vayne's nurse was a little more forgiving for Vayne's mishaps.
"How is my son?" Vayne's mother would ask every week or so, stopping by his rooms on her way to her bower.
"He improves," his nurse would say, and sometimes Vayne would be able to catch his fingers on his mother's skirts, and sometimes she would touch the top of his hair, a curious look on her face.
"He does not," she would say, "get his hair from either of us. Strange, that he takes after none of us." Then she would leave, a fluttering of silk and satin, and Vayne's nurse would bundle him back into the rooms, once more out of the way.
"How is my brother?" Isont asked, sitting straight-backed in the tutor's chair, a teacup held carefully between his fingers.
"He is well," Vayne's nurse would say, her embroidery thread snapping bright in the candle-light. Vayne would edge forward, near close enough to touch Isont's shirt-sleeves, and Isont would pause, give Vayne a small smile.
"He is a quiet child, is he not?" Isont would murmur, and the teacup would click to the saucer. "Not at all like my other brother. What a strange child." Then Isont would leave, flocked by the Senators, a dark head bent near the gray.
Vayne, the letter read, how is our little lost kit? I hope Mother hasn't found it yet, or I believe our lives will be forfeit. I'll return in the fall, so I'll expect our kit to be most grown, and most fearsome. Try not to get eaten, Little Brother, or your nurse shall be ever so cross.
Teilo's letters were splattered with mud and rust, and Vayne hid them beneath his mattress, in a little pile that grew ever so slowly.
Look for me in the winter. I'll bring you a gift, covered in snow.
A delay has caught me. I'll return in the springtime. Give Mother my love, and catch away my wishes.
I'll arrive in the summer, in time for your naming day. What shall I bring as a gift?
The men are tired, Little Brother.
I am tired, Vayne.
And-- Vayne, I cannot get on.
The letters were frayed, and they tore from being folded far too many times. Vayne read the letters, again and again, and when his nurse came in, he would slide the letters beneath his shirt, next to his skin, where they rested, warm and rough, papercuts to his chest.
Vayne would write back, sloppy ink-drips that lessened over the years.
The couerl is well. It eats a great amount, and grows by the day. Nurse is beginning to question the state of my toys.
Mother rarely stops by the nursery. I don't think she would notice anything amiss, should she come.
Father sends his regards to you daily. Isont tells me so, when he visits my rooms.
I'm no longer allowed out of doors without Bergan nearby. He is a constant shadow, and I would trade him for--
I would rather--
If Isont would speak to the Senate, I believe--
My naming-day is coming soon. I look for--
I would rather--
The couerl still grows. I grow as well. Perhaps--
I would rather--
I would ask you for--
He burned the letters in the fireplace, and instead, he would let fly the ashes from the window, and he would watch them wave and fall, scattered down to Archadia.
x
Teilo returned in the late spring, riding into Archadia before noon. Vayne fought his way down the stairs, ducking between judges and servants. He reached the courtyard, a half-step in front of Bergan, and a half-hour behind Isont.
Teilo's arms were around their mother, and Isont's hand was clutching Teilo's shoulder, and Vayne stood beyond it all, Bergan a shadow at his side.
"Father," Teilo began.
"Couldn't," Isont said, and Teilo's face was pressed against their mother's hair.
"My son," their mother said, and her hands looked small and slender as they slipped through Teilo's hair, dragging through the long tangles.
Vayne slipped closer, until he was close enough to touch, and he caught Teilo's shirt between his fingers.
"Brother," Teilo said, and Vayne pressed his face against their mother's side, and Isont's hand was heavy on Vayne's head.
x
"The couerl?" Teilo asked, and his cane tapped loudly against the tile.
"He does well," Vayne said, walking a half-step away from Teilo. "He's grown a great deal. He's kept in the third south courtyard. The judges are fond of him."
"I would see him," Teilo said, not a song but a groan. "If I might, Vayne?"
If Vayne were brave, for all his thirteen years, he would say, yes, by the gods. Anything Teilo would ask for Vayne would grant, if he could only have Teilo, as Teilo had been.
"Yes, Teilo," Vayne said, and Teilo's cane sounded all the louder.
The third southern courtyard was wild and overgrown, much like Teilo's yard had been, and Vayne hid his own things in it. His couerl, and his judges, and himself, all set out in little rows, where he would touch the world, and conquer it. There were no flowers, but there were thorns, twisting around until it was more impossible than possible to enter, and to leave.
Teilo’s arm was slung across Vayne's neck, hot and heavy, and Vayne helped his brother cross the steps into the yard, onto the moss and dirt and stone.
“Where is this couerl?" Teilo asked, and Vayne helped him to a marble bench, half-broken and all-forgotten.
"He hides," Vayne said, "from those he does not know. Wait, he'll come."
It was cold, for all that it was early summer, and Teilo's breath was mist. Vayne didn't move closer, but he didn't move farther away, either. His fingertips skittered over the cold marble, and brushed the steel cane lying between the two. The metal was colder yet, and Vayne's fingers curled around it, gripped it tight.
“I fear it will not come," Teilo said, some hours later, and his face was turned up towards the sun. "He would have forgotten me, after so many years."
"He has grown," Teilo said, hours later, and his shoulder was warm against Vayne's. "I believe he has grown to no longer need me."
“Perhaps," Teilo said, when his mist-breath was fading into the sunlight, "it is better this way. Should he see me again, I fear that it will not end well. At times, when you grow up, you realize that you must rid of yourself hindrances of old."
"You would say he would hurt you?" Vayne asked, and the cane was slowly warming in his hand.
"I would, should it come to it," Teilo said.
"I do not believe he would," Vayne said, kicking his heels at the cracked pavement.
"In time we shall see," Teilo said. He stood with difficulty, grasping Vayne's shoulder. Vayne caught him, held him steady, and the cane was caught between the two of them. "Give our little kit our regards, little brother," Teilo said, and his kiss was cool on Vayne's forehead.
No One's Kit
At eleven Vayne was, in comparison with other members of his family, a most unfortunate child. His eldest brother, Isont, took after their father, from his stern mouth to his wry sense of humor. Teilo was luckier still, taking after their mother in more ways than not. The Senate was fond of Isont, and the women of the court found favor in Teilo, and neither was much disliked by any.
Vayne, on the most unfortunate side, gained the unlikeable parts of both mother and father. He was thin and gangly, with a face that still had much growing before it could be seen as anything approaching handsome. His humor was sour, if ever present, and his moods were more often than not approaching the apathetic.
His mother viewed him with a mild disinterest, with an occasional flash of curiousity on how, exactly, she had begat such an unlikely creature. His father paid him little mind, other than the occasion conversation with Vayne's tutors. Vayne's elder brothers would, at times, remember that they indeed had a younger brother, and at times, they would even go so far as to visit Vayne's rooms.
Vayne, however, was not a cheerful child, nor a child set for much playing. He was hard to tease, harder to please, and, all in all, was a difficult, sullen, tiring thing.
Not even his nurse liked him, if rumors were to be believed.
x
"Vayne," Teilo said, a smile on his face that told Vayne that his best chance was to run for his nurse.
"Vayne," Teilo said again, arm slung around Vayne's shoulders, and Vayne wished that his legs were just a little longer than his brother's. "Vayne, I've a gift for you."
"I can't," Vayne said, "have a gift. My tutor, he said I must work on my numbers, and Mother--"
"Vayne," Teilo sang as they walked out the door, Teilo's footsteps practically skipping out on the tiles. Vayne tried to drag his feet, but Teilo was much stronger than Vayne, and much bigger, too, and Vayne was sure that, if Teilo was hard-pressed, he'd be able to drag about even Judge Bergan. "Trust me, Vayne. Don't you trust your elder brothers?"
If, in that moment, Vayne were a bit braver than his eleven years permitted, he would have said that, no, he did not trust his elder brothers. Indeed, he would trust most anyone with the exception of his elder brothers. After all, it was his elder brothers, Teilo in particular, that seemed to trick Vayne into the many scrapes for which his nurse scolded him. Judge Drace still hadn't forgiven him, and Vayne hadn't even been near her underthings.
"Yes, Brother," Vayne said, with as world-weary a tone a child could convey, and Teilo's steps moved along just a little brighter.
The lower courtyards were far wilder than the upper courtyards, since the Empress could be little bothered to travel so many stairs. Since the Empress seldomly paid the gardens much mind, the servants paid the gardens just as little mind, and the yards became places for the boys to play. The bushes overgrew their fences, twisting and twining until they overshadowed the fountains, dropping petals into the slowly moving water.
In a far corner of the westernmost yard on the seventh level, there was a particular hole that Teilo graced with his games. This hole, in particular, was one that Vayne learned, at a very young age, to avoid with all his might. The bushes hid it well from windows that might overlook the garden, and in this dark little hole, Teilo hid spiders and snakes and pretty little maids, all in a row.
This was the exact hole that Teilo was currently leading Vayne to.
"My numbers," Vayne said, already feeling spider-legs on the back of his neck, "are very poor. Father is most displeased, and if my tutor notices me missing, Father will certainly--"
There was something moving in the bushes.
It wasn't that Vayne screamed, for he did not scream. He had learned, at the tender age of seven, that screaming made Teilo laugh all the harder. Instead, Vayne made little gasping noises, and he would pale to a most becoming shade.
The dirt was soggy around Vayne's fingernails, and Teilo's arm was still slung over his neck, hot and heavy.
"For you, little brother," Teilo said, and he sounded as though he was laughing. "A little lost kit for our little lost brother."
x
The couerl was hidden in Vayne's old playroom for the first few weeks. Teilo was gone on another campaign, dressed in silver and platinum, and the palace was slowly restricted. There were rumors of a war on the horizon, and Vayne was kept to his rooms all the more, out of the footsteps of hurrying judges and harrying senators.
Vayne took to his studies, and took to his rooms, and would watch Archadia outside his windows. At times, Bergan would come in with a missive from Isont, or Father, or sometimes, rarely, Teilo. Vayne's marks improved, though his tutor still said he was more hopeless than not, and Vayne's nurse was a little more forgiving for Vayne's mishaps.
"How is my son?" Vayne's mother would ask every week or so, stopping by his rooms on her way to her bower.
"He improves," his nurse would say, and sometimes Vayne would be able to catch his fingers on his mother's skirts, and sometimes she would touch the top of his hair, a curious look on her face.
"He does not," she would say, "get his hair from either of us. Strange, that he takes after none of us." Then she would leave, a fluttering of silk and satin, and Vayne's nurse would bundle him back into the rooms, once more out of the way.
"How is my brother?" Isont asked, sitting straight-backed in the tutor's chair, a teacup held carefully between his fingers.
"He is well," Vayne's nurse would say, her embroidery thread snapping bright in the candle-light. Vayne would edge forward, near close enough to touch Isont's shirt-sleeves, and Isont would pause, give Vayne a small smile.
"He is a quiet child, is he not?" Isont would murmur, and the teacup would click to the saucer. "Not at all like my other brother. What a strange child." Then Isont would leave, flocked by the Senators, a dark head bent near the gray.
Vayne, the letter read, how is our little lost kit? I hope Mother hasn't found it yet, or I believe our lives will be forfeit. I'll return in the fall, so I'll expect our kit to be most grown, and most fearsome. Try not to get eaten, Little Brother, or your nurse shall be ever so cross.
Teilo's letters were splattered with mud and rust, and Vayne hid them beneath his mattress, in a little pile that grew ever so slowly.
Look for me in the winter. I'll bring you a gift, covered in snow.
A delay has caught me. I'll return in the springtime. Give Mother my love, and catch away my wishes.
I'll arrive in the summer, in time for your naming day. What shall I bring as a gift?
The men are tired, Little Brother.
I am tired, Vayne.
And-- Vayne, I cannot get on.
The letters were frayed, and they tore from being folded far too many times. Vayne read the letters, again and again, and when his nurse came in, he would slide the letters beneath his shirt, next to his skin, where they rested, warm and rough, papercuts to his chest.
Vayne would write back, sloppy ink-drips that lessened over the years.
The couerl is well. It eats a great amount, and grows by the day. Nurse is beginning to question the state of my toys.
Mother rarely stops by the nursery. I don't think she would notice anything amiss, should she come.
Father sends his regards to you daily. Isont tells me so, when he visits my rooms.
I'm no longer allowed out of doors without Bergan nearby. He is a constant shadow, and I would trade him for--
I would rather--
If Isont would speak to the Senate, I believe--
My naming-day is coming soon. I look for--
I would rather--
The couerl still grows. I grow as well. Perhaps--
I would rather--
I would ask you for--
He burned the letters in the fireplace, and instead, he would let fly the ashes from the window, and he would watch them wave and fall, scattered down to Archadia.
x
Teilo returned in the late spring, riding into Archadia before noon. Vayne fought his way down the stairs, ducking between judges and servants. He reached the courtyard, a half-step in front of Bergan, and a half-hour behind Isont.
Teilo's arms were around their mother, and Isont's hand was clutching Teilo's shoulder, and Vayne stood beyond it all, Bergan a shadow at his side.
"Father," Teilo began.
"Couldn't," Isont said, and Teilo's face was pressed against their mother's hair.
"My son," their mother said, and her hands looked small and slender as they slipped through Teilo's hair, dragging through the long tangles.
Vayne slipped closer, until he was close enough to touch, and he caught Teilo's shirt between his fingers.
"Brother," Teilo said, and Vayne pressed his face against their mother's side, and Isont's hand was heavy on Vayne's head.
x
"The couerl?" Teilo asked, and his cane tapped loudly against the tile.
"He does well," Vayne said, walking a half-step away from Teilo. "He's grown a great deal. He's kept in the third south courtyard. The judges are fond of him."
"I would see him," Teilo said, not a song but a groan. "If I might, Vayne?"
If Vayne were brave, for all his thirteen years, he would say, yes, by the gods. Anything Teilo would ask for Vayne would grant, if he could only have Teilo, as Teilo had been.
"Yes, Teilo," Vayne said, and Teilo's cane sounded all the louder.
The third southern courtyard was wild and overgrown, much like Teilo's yard had been, and Vayne hid his own things in it. His couerl, and his judges, and himself, all set out in little rows, where he would touch the world, and conquer it. There were no flowers, but there were thorns, twisting around until it was more impossible than possible to enter, and to leave.
Teilo’s arm was slung across Vayne's neck, hot and heavy, and Vayne helped his brother cross the steps into the yard, onto the moss and dirt and stone.
“Where is this couerl?" Teilo asked, and Vayne helped him to a marble bench, half-broken and all-forgotten.
"He hides," Vayne said, "from those he does not know. Wait, he'll come."
It was cold, for all that it was early summer, and Teilo's breath was mist. Vayne didn't move closer, but he didn't move farther away, either. His fingertips skittered over the cold marble, and brushed the steel cane lying between the two. The metal was colder yet, and Vayne's fingers curled around it, gripped it tight.
“I fear it will not come," Teilo said, some hours later, and his face was turned up towards the sun. "He would have forgotten me, after so many years."
"He has grown," Teilo said, hours later, and his shoulder was warm against Vayne's. "I believe he has grown to no longer need me."
“Perhaps," Teilo said, when his mist-breath was fading into the sunlight, "it is better this way. Should he see me again, I fear that it will not end well. At times, when you grow up, you realize that you must rid of yourself hindrances of old."
"You would say he would hurt you?" Vayne asked, and the cane was slowly warming in his hand.
"I would, should it come to it," Teilo said.
"I do not believe he would," Vayne said, kicking his heels at the cracked pavement.
"In time we shall see," Teilo said. He stood with difficulty, grasping Vayne's shoulder. Vayne caught him, held him steady, and the cane was caught between the two of them. "Give our little kit our regards, little brother," Teilo said, and his kiss was cool on Vayne's forehead.