Writer's Block: Reacting to my bad mood
When I'm having a bad day, I tend to get really quiet but say that everything's fine to those around me. As soon as I can get, I think of an excuse and leave. I make a bee line to my car and just drive. Drive and cry. I don't know why I do it but I do. I blast the music and just try to forget about everything. I might stop at a store and go in and just look around. Or I might just drive around the town, stopping in a parking lot if I have to cry some more. I tend to just circle a close perimeter too...nothing too far away. I don't end up in Timbuktu or anything.
The thing is, too, I want someone to talk to. I know it sounds weird because I leave and drive alone but I do. When I'm driving, I constantly look at my phone and silently beg someone to call me at the right time. Someone I can just spill my feelings out to. I probably wouldn't even care if it was a wrong number or a close friend. As long it was someone to talk to. But that's the thing. They have to call. Otherwise I'll just drive around for a good hour or so.
The thing is, too, I want someone to talk to. I know it sounds weird because I leave and drive alone but I do. When I'm driving, I constantly look at my phone and silently beg someone to call me at the right time. Someone I can just spill my feelings out to. I probably wouldn't even care if it was a wrong number or a close friend. As long it was someone to talk to. But that's the thing. They have to call. Otherwise I'll just drive around for a good hour or so.