How far can you go down hill?
I'll just say this very bluntly..
The truck is a lemon.
I had NOT made money since I got back on my truck after a visit/truck repair in Indianapolis.
I been in the hole as much as negative 1000 for the last 6 weeks and counting. THOUGH last week I finally got it lowered to negative -500. All because I decided to become a trainer in desperation and lucked out with getting a student who was just a re-hire and knew exactly what he needed to do.
I am TWO month behind half my bills, and ONE month behind the other half.
Honestly, I been trying to work as hard as I can and get this under control. I can not help but feel that I am a total fool. And you know what, I am.
I have NOT contacted family about this except my Mother. And the only reason she knows is she's VERY persistent on getting info out of me when she calls. Cause everyone knew I would fail. Do I feel they are right? YES...and NO. I just feel I been jinxed to fail. But at the same time, this IS the problem if things didn't go well and got a lemon of a truck. Guess what? It's a lemon.
Anyway, I have no idea how to get out of this on my own. But I am so fucking tired of failing at life. And I am so tired of begging for a way out and borrowing for more time.
So really, fuck bills, fuck debt, fuck everything.
Let's free fall.
It's about all I got going.
But I will still be kicking and screaming while falling. But I am not going to grab anyone with me to drag them down with me anymore.
The truck is a lemon.
I had NOT made money since I got back on my truck after a visit/truck repair in Indianapolis.
I been in the hole as much as negative 1000 for the last 6 weeks and counting. THOUGH last week I finally got it lowered to negative -500. All because I decided to become a trainer in desperation and lucked out with getting a student who was just a re-hire and knew exactly what he needed to do.
I am TWO month behind half my bills, and ONE month behind the other half.
Honestly, I been trying to work as hard as I can and get this under control. I can not help but feel that I am a total fool. And you know what, I am.
I have NOT contacted family about this except my Mother. And the only reason she knows is she's VERY persistent on getting info out of me when she calls. Cause everyone knew I would fail. Do I feel they are right? YES...and NO. I just feel I been jinxed to fail. But at the same time, this IS the problem if things didn't go well and got a lemon of a truck. Guess what? It's a lemon.
Anyway, I have no idea how to get out of this on my own. But I am so fucking tired of failing at life. And I am so tired of begging for a way out and borrowing for more time.
So really, fuck bills, fuck debt, fuck everything.
Let's free fall.
It's about all I got going.
But I will still be kicking and screaming while falling. But I am not going to grab anyone with me to drag them down with me anymore.