so many vivid dreams again!!!!

[mickmick77]

they taunt me when i sleep
they creep in through my head
these visions of people
i thought i had left in the past
i wake up shivering and covered in sweat
i still feel the ecstasy
slowly draining from my body
that name is on my lips
that smell is still in my head
then i realize i shouldn't be dreaming these things
i realize i have let this go
no more talking
no more visits
no more hanging out with friends
no more hugs
no more support
nobody left to talk to like we used to talk
no long, lingering, passionate kisses
that made my entire body tremble
no arms around me
the ones that made me feel so safe
no more tears shed for no other reason than i had been crying
no more laughing, and running and giggling
no more playing with the kids
it was all a lie
i thought i had left it behind
distanced myself enough
learned not to care
then, when i sleep
it all creeps back into my head

and i cry again