(no subject)
I have come to realize that I really don't think about things much before I act. Nor do I spend a lot of time planning. I used to have goals, I used to feel motivated, I used to have plans, and dreams and aspirations.
I really don't anymore. I am just letting things happen. Simply living and sitting back and watching. This doesn't really upset me, or make me depressed. I have kinda grown used to it because I have been shifting this way in the last few years. I remember back in school all the plans I had. The things I thought I would eventually do. The schools I would go to, and the person I would become.
A year ago it seemed just plain negative to feel the way I was. But it isn't like that anymore. So I don't want to play the depression card. I look around me and everyone is growing up. I am stuck as childish as ever, and the sorts. But at the same time I feel old. And to bypass that I act silly. I am silly. I miss the old me. But even with the drama, it seems simple. Life is simple.
It just makes me nostalgic. I want to be a better person.
Don't try to piece that together... Random babble thoughts.
I really don't anymore. I am just letting things happen. Simply living and sitting back and watching. This doesn't really upset me, or make me depressed. I have kinda grown used to it because I have been shifting this way in the last few years. I remember back in school all the plans I had. The things I thought I would eventually do. The schools I would go to, and the person I would become.
A year ago it seemed just plain negative to feel the way I was. But it isn't like that anymore. So I don't want to play the depression card. I look around me and everyone is growing up. I am stuck as childish as ever, and the sorts. But at the same time I feel old. And to bypass that I act silly. I am silly. I miss the old me. But even with the drama, it seems simple. Life is simple.
It just makes me nostalgic. I want to be a better person.
Don't try to piece that together... Random babble thoughts.