Fun With the Aeneid.
This is what happens when my brain fries trying to write a final paper for English. I summarize a completely irrelevant part of the book to one of my friends.
Book IV of Virgil's The Aeneid, Very Abridged Version.
Micalla518: have you got any idea how hard it is to write a paper on the Aeneid without using the phrase "Trojan Man"?
Micalla518: I mean I could use it, but the fits of giggles that would ensue might not help my grade.
okibi banshi: HAHAHAHA
okibi banshi: <3
Micalla518: seriously.
Micalla518: lol
Micalla518: <3 back
Micalla518: i just can't get through this
Micalla518: i'm sitting here like
Micalla518: This shows that Aeneas is respected by his people as their king, but he is humble as well, considering himself to be a Trojan man before all else.
Micalla518: and i had to change it to man of Troy, lmao
okibi banshi: XD
Micalla518: yes. he considers himself to be a sex god.
Micalla518: ooohh, aeneas...
okibi banshi: hahsdjfahdsjfhjkldsajk
Micalla518: look at meee, i'm dido
okibi banshi: O.o what?
Micalla518: lol ok here's a brief summary of book IV of the aenid
Micalla518: Dido: OMG Aeneas that was a fanTAStic story
Micalla518: Everyone else: whatever
Micalla518: Venus: I'm gonna mess with your head, Dido. CUPID!! get your ass over here!! See that Queen? sit on her lap and breathe on her.
Micalla518: Cupid: WHAT?
Micalla518: Venus: don't disobey your mother. I SAID BREATHE.
Micalla518: Cupid: Umm, OK mom, whatever. Jeez, the things I gotta do because Aeneas is my half brother because mom's a whore...
Micalla518: Venus: I HEARD THAT.
Micalla518: Dido: oh, what a cute baby! oh, baby breath!
Micalla518: Aeneas: More punch, Dido?
Micalla518: Dido: LIKEOMG AENEAS YOU ARE TEH SEXY I LOOOOOVE YOU!!!
Micalla518: Aeneas: o.O....Dude!! Score!!!
Micalla518: Dido: Hey Aeneas, let's go *hunting* tomorrow!
Micalla518: Aeneas: Awesome! I'm a great hunter! Just the other day I...
Micalla518: Dido: Yeah, whatever. I'm gonna wear my sexy dress, so be there or be square.
Micalla518: THE NEXT DAY
Micalla518: Aeneas: Wow, you look good Dido.
Micalla518: Dido: OMG LIEK AENEAS YOU ARE TEH SEXY IN YOUR HUNTING GEAR
Micalla518: Juno: I'm horny. Time for some mind-altering porn.
Micalla518: The Sky: BOOM!! THUNDERBOLTS AND LIGHTNING, VERY VERY FRIGHTENING!!!
Micalla518: Dido: Aw, shit, it's raining...Hey, look! A conveniently placed cave!!...HEY AENEAS, IT'S RAINING, WHY DON'T WE GO WARM UP IN THERE?
Micalla518: Aeneas: SCORE!!!!
Micalla518: Some time later...
Micalla518: Dido: OMG LIEK YOU CAN'T GO TO ITALY YOU GOTTA STAY HERE AND BE MY BABYDADDY
Micalla518: Aeneas: OK, woman, two things: first of all, if I don't go to Italy, the gods will kick my ass. And I like my ass. Second: Ascanius is my son, not yours.
Micalla518: Dido: Babydaddy?
Micalla518: Aeneas: No.
okibi banshi: hahahahsdajkafla
Micalla518: Dido: Aren't we married because we had sex in a cave?
Micalla518: Aeneas: No.
Micalla518: Dido: OMG LIEK YOU LIE!!!!!11!!!1!!!
Micalla518: Aeneas: No. I have to leave now.
Micalla518: Dido: Fine. Go. YO, ANNA!! Build a pyre so I can burn all of his things in the first Boyfriend Bonfire ever.
Micalla518: Anna: OK...
Micalla518: Dido: HA!! I FOOLED YOU ALL!!! I REALLY wanted it to be my funeral pyre!!! *stab*
Micalla518: Anna: YOU BITCH
Micalla518: Aeneas *on his boat*: What's that fire out there? Dido must be having a barbeque or something. Oh well. Anybody up for a game of Spin the Spear?
Micalla518: The End. *bows*
*long pause later*
okibi banshi: HAHAHSHJKFLAHDJKL
okibi banshi: that was cleolinda-esque awesomeness.
okibi banshi: you rock.
Micalla518: hhahahaha
Micalla518: thank you ^_^
I can go to sleep feeling like I've accomplished something now ^_^
Book IV of Virgil's The Aeneid, Very Abridged Version.
Micalla518: have you got any idea how hard it is to write a paper on the Aeneid without using the phrase "Trojan Man"?
Micalla518: I mean I could use it, but the fits of giggles that would ensue might not help my grade.
okibi banshi: HAHAHAHA
okibi banshi: <3
Micalla518: seriously.
Micalla518: lol
Micalla518: <3 back
Micalla518: i just can't get through this
Micalla518: i'm sitting here like
Micalla518: This shows that Aeneas is respected by his people as their king, but he is humble as well, considering himself to be a Trojan man before all else.
Micalla518: and i had to change it to man of Troy, lmao
okibi banshi: XD
Micalla518: yes. he considers himself to be a sex god.
Micalla518: ooohh, aeneas...
okibi banshi: hahsdjfahdsjfhjkldsajk
Micalla518: look at meee, i'm dido
okibi banshi: O.o what?
Micalla518: lol ok here's a brief summary of book IV of the aenid
Micalla518: Dido: OMG Aeneas that was a fanTAStic story
Micalla518: Everyone else: whatever
Micalla518: Venus: I'm gonna mess with your head, Dido. CUPID!! get your ass over here!! See that Queen? sit on her lap and breathe on her.
Micalla518: Cupid: WHAT?
Micalla518: Venus: don't disobey your mother. I SAID BREATHE.
Micalla518: Cupid: Umm, OK mom, whatever. Jeez, the things I gotta do because Aeneas is my half brother because mom's a whore...
Micalla518: Venus: I HEARD THAT.
Micalla518: Dido: oh, what a cute baby! oh, baby breath!
Micalla518: Aeneas: More punch, Dido?
Micalla518: Dido: LIKEOMG AENEAS YOU ARE TEH SEXY I LOOOOOVE YOU!!!
Micalla518: Aeneas: o.O....Dude!! Score!!!
Micalla518: Dido: Hey Aeneas, let's go *hunting* tomorrow!
Micalla518: Aeneas: Awesome! I'm a great hunter! Just the other day I...
Micalla518: Dido: Yeah, whatever. I'm gonna wear my sexy dress, so be there or be square.
Micalla518: THE NEXT DAY
Micalla518: Aeneas: Wow, you look good Dido.
Micalla518: Dido: OMG LIEK AENEAS YOU ARE TEH SEXY IN YOUR HUNTING GEAR
Micalla518: Juno: I'm horny. Time for some mind-altering porn.
Micalla518: The Sky: BOOM!! THUNDERBOLTS AND LIGHTNING, VERY VERY FRIGHTENING!!!
Micalla518: Dido: Aw, shit, it's raining...Hey, look! A conveniently placed cave!!...HEY AENEAS, IT'S RAINING, WHY DON'T WE GO WARM UP IN THERE?
Micalla518: Aeneas: SCORE!!!!
Micalla518: Some time later...
Micalla518: Dido: OMG LIEK YOU CAN'T GO TO ITALY YOU GOTTA STAY HERE AND BE MY BABYDADDY
Micalla518: Aeneas: OK, woman, two things: first of all, if I don't go to Italy, the gods will kick my ass. And I like my ass. Second: Ascanius is my son, not yours.
Micalla518: Dido: Babydaddy?
Micalla518: Aeneas: No.
okibi banshi: hahahahsdajkafla
Micalla518: Dido: Aren't we married because we had sex in a cave?
Micalla518: Aeneas: No.
Micalla518: Dido: OMG LIEK YOU LIE!!!!!11!!!1!!!
Micalla518: Aeneas: No. I have to leave now.
Micalla518: Dido: Fine. Go. YO, ANNA!! Build a pyre so I can burn all of his things in the first Boyfriend Bonfire ever.
Micalla518: Anna: OK...
Micalla518: Dido: HA!! I FOOLED YOU ALL!!! I REALLY wanted it to be my funeral pyre!!! *stab*
Micalla518: Anna: YOU BITCH
Micalla518: Aeneas *on his boat*: What's that fire out there? Dido must be having a barbeque or something. Oh well. Anybody up for a game of Spin the Spear?
Micalla518: The End. *bows*
*long pause later*
okibi banshi: HAHAHSHJKFLAHDJKL
okibi banshi: that was cleolinda-esque awesomeness.
okibi banshi: you rock.
Micalla518: hhahahaha
Micalla518: thank you ^_^
I can go to sleep feeling like I've accomplished something now ^_^