Shifting Underneath Our Feet (Jack/Jenna)
Title: Shifting Underneath Our Feet
Prompt: un_love_you #23. You remind me of me.
Fandom: 30 Rock
Pairing: Jack/Jenna
Note: This is an established relationship, future fic not about Jack/Liz, so I'm not sure how well this will work for people. But I found it interesting to write.
Spoilers: through 'Verna'
Word Count: 840
Rating: PG
Table: Over here.
Summary: They've both changed.
Disclaimer: Characters are not mine. Please don't sue.
*
In the time since he and Jenna met, Jack, despite his belief in the inflexibility of one's nature, has come to realize they've both changed. Not entirely, but not insignificantly. She's started to be upfront about her age; he's stopped sleeping with twentysomething women in an attempt to ignore his age. She's not always wrong; he doesn't always need for everyone to know when he's right. And this thing they've found themselves in, which would have been nothing but sex if it had started four years ago... well, quite frankly, sex is a very important part of their relationship.
(He loves that she's always excited by the prospect of going to bed -- or couch, or desk, or surprisingly sturdy end table, or surprisingly unsturdy dining room table -- with him. He doesn't mean to imply he considers her desire shocking, but he'd think after years of imagining what it would be like to have sex with him, the reality would be disappointing enough that she'd fail to keep up the level of interest she harbored pre-intimacy. And he recognizes that his looks, while still eye-catching, have faded over the years; that he's not losing the weight he's gained. Some women, at least those who only sleep with him because of his money and power, tire of him. He doesn't like that he's gotten to the point in his life where he's sensed -- more than once, even more than ten times -- a woman feigning sexual interest in him, but, again, this isn't a current concern.)
But sex is not all they share. Another thing that's changed since they first met: they're sick of having meaningless nights with meaningless people.
Which isn't to say they've declared themselves to be in love, or have total faith it will last (she doesn't think she wants kids, and this is another shift; having children is important to him), but they're not treating this as a fling. She considers him her boyfriend. (Her rich, attractive, sexually-skilled boyfriend is what she told Billy Bush at the premiere of Bunny-Love, a children's film about the Easter Bunny taking human form to chase his dream of becoming a famous tennis player. She was not happy with Access Hollywood's failure to air the interview, or with the severe cuts to her role as a sassy sports agent.) He refers to her as his girlfriend. Is honest with her up to a point. For instance: He'll tell her when she's being overly dramatic (which is happening less and less; either Jack or time or the combination of the two is succeeding in calming her). He'll tell her when he's most acutely aware of how much he cares for her. But when Verna last came to visit, for Christmas, Jack didn't let Jenna catch on that he doesn't care for the woman, certainly didn't give any clues as to their arrangement, and didn't criticize her and Jenna's holiday-themed version of 'I'll Make Love to You' (sample lyric: Oh Christmas night is your night, and I will do you right). Jenna insisted on rewriting it for Christmas because otherwise it wouldn't be 'appropriate for the time.' And he didn't even say anything about that, though he did give her a look.
Fine. He said something about the performance, but not to Jenna, and not to someone who'd encourage him to continue on with voicing his disapproval. Lemon, in fact, barely noted his disapproval. That Lemon fails to see a problem with the incestuous tone of their duets does take him aback, but Jack assumes her heart continues to be sufficiently warmed by the mother-daughter reunion for the ignoring of such things to be possible. (He hasn't told Liz of Verna's true motivation, either.)
Another change: he now understands dishonesty can be a kindness and not simply a means to an end. (He sometimes wishes he had evolved enough to cease lying for his own benefit, but he supposes that would be the sort of personal growth a man who works in television can't afford.) Knows dishonesty can build a family as easily as it can tear one apart, and feeling loved by a parent is important even when said parent doesn't deserve to be loved back.
He thinks of his father whenever that truth passes through his mind. Or, rather, the man he thought was his father, the man who was never around but from who the younger version of Jack craved attention. Craved love. (He still wants to be loved, if not by Jimmy Donaghy. He still wants someone to love him for longer than a couple of months.)
Jenna and he aren't so different, really. And, yes, when they first met, he never would have considered such a possibility. Nor would he have thought he'd be concerned about her happiness, or be proud of himself for helping to make her happy before it was expected of him, or want to continue making her happy.
Sometimes, that change scares him. But he does believe it's a change for the better.
END
Prompt: un_love_you #23. You remind me of me.
Fandom: 30 Rock
Pairing: Jack/Jenna
Note: This is an established relationship, future fic not about Jack/Liz, so I'm not sure how well this will work for people. But I found it interesting to write.
Spoilers: through 'Verna'
Word Count: 840
Rating: PG
Table: Over here.
Summary: They've both changed.
Disclaimer: Characters are not mine. Please don't sue.
*
In the time since he and Jenna met, Jack, despite his belief in the inflexibility of one's nature, has come to realize they've both changed. Not entirely, but not insignificantly. She's started to be upfront about her age; he's stopped sleeping with twentysomething women in an attempt to ignore his age. She's not always wrong; he doesn't always need for everyone to know when he's right. And this thing they've found themselves in, which would have been nothing but sex if it had started four years ago... well, quite frankly, sex is a very important part of their relationship.
(He loves that she's always excited by the prospect of going to bed -- or couch, or desk, or surprisingly sturdy end table, or surprisingly unsturdy dining room table -- with him. He doesn't mean to imply he considers her desire shocking, but he'd think after years of imagining what it would be like to have sex with him, the reality would be disappointing enough that she'd fail to keep up the level of interest she harbored pre-intimacy. And he recognizes that his looks, while still eye-catching, have faded over the years; that he's not losing the weight he's gained. Some women, at least those who only sleep with him because of his money and power, tire of him. He doesn't like that he's gotten to the point in his life where he's sensed -- more than once, even more than ten times -- a woman feigning sexual interest in him, but, again, this isn't a current concern.)
But sex is not all they share. Another thing that's changed since they first met: they're sick of having meaningless nights with meaningless people.
Which isn't to say they've declared themselves to be in love, or have total faith it will last (she doesn't think she wants kids, and this is another shift; having children is important to him), but they're not treating this as a fling. She considers him her boyfriend. (Her rich, attractive, sexually-skilled boyfriend is what she told Billy Bush at the premiere of Bunny-Love, a children's film about the Easter Bunny taking human form to chase his dream of becoming a famous tennis player. She was not happy with Access Hollywood's failure to air the interview, or with the severe cuts to her role as a sassy sports agent.) He refers to her as his girlfriend. Is honest with her up to a point. For instance: He'll tell her when she's being overly dramatic (which is happening less and less; either Jack or time or the combination of the two is succeeding in calming her). He'll tell her when he's most acutely aware of how much he cares for her. But when Verna last came to visit, for Christmas, Jack didn't let Jenna catch on that he doesn't care for the woman, certainly didn't give any clues as to their arrangement, and didn't criticize her and Jenna's holiday-themed version of 'I'll Make Love to You' (sample lyric: Oh Christmas night is your night, and I will do you right). Jenna insisted on rewriting it for Christmas because otherwise it wouldn't be 'appropriate for the time.' And he didn't even say anything about that, though he did give her a look.
Fine. He said something about the performance, but not to Jenna, and not to someone who'd encourage him to continue on with voicing his disapproval. Lemon, in fact, barely noted his disapproval. That Lemon fails to see a problem with the incestuous tone of their duets does take him aback, but Jack assumes her heart continues to be sufficiently warmed by the mother-daughter reunion for the ignoring of such things to be possible. (He hasn't told Liz of Verna's true motivation, either.)
Another change: he now understands dishonesty can be a kindness and not simply a means to an end. (He sometimes wishes he had evolved enough to cease lying for his own benefit, but he supposes that would be the sort of personal growth a man who works in television can't afford.) Knows dishonesty can build a family as easily as it can tear one apart, and feeling loved by a parent is important even when said parent doesn't deserve to be loved back.
He thinks of his father whenever that truth passes through his mind. Or, rather, the man he thought was his father, the man who was never around but from who the younger version of Jack craved attention. Craved love. (He still wants to be loved, if not by Jimmy Donaghy. He still wants someone to love him for longer than a couple of months.)
Jenna and he aren't so different, really. And, yes, when they first met, he never would have considered such a possibility. Nor would he have thought he'd be concerned about her happiness, or be proud of himself for helping to make her happy before it was expected of him, or want to continue making her happy.
Sometimes, that change scares him. But he does believe it's a change for the better.
END