If I Were Dido, I'd Thank You in a Song (30 Rock, Jack/Liz)
Title: If I Were Dido, I'd Thank You in a Song
Prompt: 100_situations #091. Burst
Fandom: 30 Rock
Pairing: Jack/Liz
Word Count: 862
Rating: PG
Table: Number Two.
Summary: How Liz outs herself as a Jack-dating person.
Disclaimer: Not mine. Don't sue!
*
Liz outs herself as a Jack-dating person in an Emmy speech. She and her fellow TGS writers have just won for Outstanding Writing for a Variety, Music or Comedy Program and she ends up suddenly changing what she'd rehearsed (though she didn't expect to win) to include, "And last but not least, I'd like to thank my boyfriend Jack, who drives me insane. Sometimes even in a good way." (This gets a laugh.) In the moments after she says it, she can sense realization pass over the people collected behind her. They now know why Jack is there as her date-but-not-really (though he actually is), why he's spent most of the night by her side, why he had his hand on hers before their category was announced. She says a final "Thank you all" before they leave the stage. (Yes, she goes the wrong way at first.)
After a couple minutes backstage, Frank says, "The Jack in your speech was Jack-Donaghy-Jack, right?"
Lutz's eyes widen. "It was?" (Well, apparently realization didn't pass over him.)
"It was," Liz says. "It's no big deal. It's just... a thing. Between adults. That we shouldn't discuss anymore, because it is none of your business."
Several seconds of silence. Then Frank says, "Now that you're doing the boss, can I get some monkeys for 'Chuck Norris at the Zoo'?"
"No," she snaps. "I'm not using my relationship to get more crap for our show. It's... gross. Anyway, I don't want to deal with monkeys."
"Wow, Liz. That's totally sexist," he replies, and before she can ask what that means, they're being ushered into the press room. They aren't asked too many questions because, well. Reporters don't really care about people who are just writers and aren't named Diablo Cody. Someone from Entertainment Weekly asks if it was a surprise for them to beat a program as funny and innovative as The Daily Show. (Liz's response: "Well, I guess it was certainly a surprise to you.") Then a few questions about Tracy and a 'Who are you wearing?' that Liz mistakenly believes to be directed at her. (Frank doesn't seem surprised the question's for him. "Tux, hat, shoes, all me. The socks are from Target." Sandy Anders from TVTime.com seems very interested in getting an 'Eat Tacos' hat for herself.) There are no questions about Jack, as probably none of them knows she's just admitted to sleeping with her boss. And even if they did, they probably wouldn't care. (One of the good things about not being famous, she supposes.)
When she gets back to her seat, she asks, "Did I just make a lot of trouble for us?"
"In what sense?"
She stares at Jack incredulously. "In the 'my staff knows I'm dating you' sense. In the 'you're my boss and maybe us being a couple isn't exactly appropriate' way."
Jack shrugs. "I don't believe so. Your staff has no power over me. And I imagine Geiss would be sympathetic, as he's had relationships with employees in the past. He's even been attracted to creative types like yourself from time to time."
Her stare continues to be incredulous. "You're not seeing me to be more like Don Geiss, are you?"
"Don't be ridiculous," he scoffs. "If that was my goal, I would've ended this five months ago and had you transferred to Arizona. You know, I'm pleasantly surprised you thanked me."
"Really? I thought you'd be expecting it."
"I assumed you were too worried about exposing our relationship to even thank me as your boss and mentor. That you were concerned you might say my name with too much affection or in a way suspiciously professional--"
"I did worry about that. A lot. So, yeah, I wasn't actually going to thank you. But when I was up there, I thought, you know, who cares if they find out. And I couldn't not thank you. You're one of the most important people in my life." That seems like an overly serious thing to say, so. "Right alongside Han Solo and my hot dog vendor."
He smiles slightly, the I-know-you one that sometimes makes her want to hit him, but often (like right now) makes her want to kiss him. "You really do love me."
"Yeah, well. Of course I do." This also seems too serious, especially with Lutz a few seats away. But she can't find a way to undercut it, and she doesn't especially want to. "So."
"I love you, too. Substantially more than hot dog vendors or any Harrison Ford character."
She laughs, because he says the second part with as much gravity as the first. "Even Indiana Jones?"
"Certainly. I don't trust men who carry whips."
Then she does kiss him, because. Just because. From a couple rows back, Frank calls out, "Are you getting me my monkeys?"
"No," she yells, not bothering to look in his direction.
"What does that mean?" Jack asks. "If it's a euphemism for something sexual, I encourage you to fire him."
"It's..." She shakes her head. "It's nothing."
His hand is over hers for the second time of the evening. "Congratulations on your award, Lemon."
"Thank you. Again."
END
Prompt: 100_situations #091. Burst
Fandom: 30 Rock
Pairing: Jack/Liz
Word Count: 862
Rating: PG
Table: Number Two.
Summary: How Liz outs herself as a Jack-dating person.
Disclaimer: Not mine. Don't sue!
*
Liz outs herself as a Jack-dating person in an Emmy speech. She and her fellow TGS writers have just won for Outstanding Writing for a Variety, Music or Comedy Program and she ends up suddenly changing what she'd rehearsed (though she didn't expect to win) to include, "And last but not least, I'd like to thank my boyfriend Jack, who drives me insane. Sometimes even in a good way." (This gets a laugh.) In the moments after she says it, she can sense realization pass over the people collected behind her. They now know why Jack is there as her date-but-not-really (though he actually is), why he's spent most of the night by her side, why he had his hand on hers before their category was announced. She says a final "Thank you all" before they leave the stage. (Yes, she goes the wrong way at first.)
After a couple minutes backstage, Frank says, "The Jack in your speech was Jack-Donaghy-Jack, right?"
Lutz's eyes widen. "It was?" (Well, apparently realization didn't pass over him.)
"It was," Liz says. "It's no big deal. It's just... a thing. Between adults. That we shouldn't discuss anymore, because it is none of your business."
Several seconds of silence. Then Frank says, "Now that you're doing the boss, can I get some monkeys for 'Chuck Norris at the Zoo'?"
"No," she snaps. "I'm not using my relationship to get more crap for our show. It's... gross. Anyway, I don't want to deal with monkeys."
"Wow, Liz. That's totally sexist," he replies, and before she can ask what that means, they're being ushered into the press room. They aren't asked too many questions because, well. Reporters don't really care about people who are just writers and aren't named Diablo Cody. Someone from Entertainment Weekly asks if it was a surprise for them to beat a program as funny and innovative as The Daily Show. (Liz's response: "Well, I guess it was certainly a surprise to you.") Then a few questions about Tracy and a 'Who are you wearing?' that Liz mistakenly believes to be directed at her. (Frank doesn't seem surprised the question's for him. "Tux, hat, shoes, all me. The socks are from Target." Sandy Anders from TVTime.com seems very interested in getting an 'Eat Tacos' hat for herself.) There are no questions about Jack, as probably none of them knows she's just admitted to sleeping with her boss. And even if they did, they probably wouldn't care. (One of the good things about not being famous, she supposes.)
When she gets back to her seat, she asks, "Did I just make a lot of trouble for us?"
"In what sense?"
She stares at Jack incredulously. "In the 'my staff knows I'm dating you' sense. In the 'you're my boss and maybe us being a couple isn't exactly appropriate' way."
Jack shrugs. "I don't believe so. Your staff has no power over me. And I imagine Geiss would be sympathetic, as he's had relationships with employees in the past. He's even been attracted to creative types like yourself from time to time."
Her stare continues to be incredulous. "You're not seeing me to be more like Don Geiss, are you?"
"Don't be ridiculous," he scoffs. "If that was my goal, I would've ended this five months ago and had you transferred to Arizona. You know, I'm pleasantly surprised you thanked me."
"Really? I thought you'd be expecting it."
"I assumed you were too worried about exposing our relationship to even thank me as your boss and mentor. That you were concerned you might say my name with too much affection or in a way suspiciously professional--"
"I did worry about that. A lot. So, yeah, I wasn't actually going to thank you. But when I was up there, I thought, you know, who cares if they find out. And I couldn't not thank you. You're one of the most important people in my life." That seems like an overly serious thing to say, so. "Right alongside Han Solo and my hot dog vendor."
He smiles slightly, the I-know-you one that sometimes makes her want to hit him, but often (like right now) makes her want to kiss him. "You really do love me."
"Yeah, well. Of course I do." This also seems too serious, especially with Lutz a few seats away. But she can't find a way to undercut it, and she doesn't especially want to. "So."
"I love you, too. Substantially more than hot dog vendors or any Harrison Ford character."
She laughs, because he says the second part with as much gravity as the first. "Even Indiana Jones?"
"Certainly. I don't trust men who carry whips."
Then she does kiss him, because. Just because. From a couple rows back, Frank calls out, "Are you getting me my monkeys?"
"No," she yells, not bothering to look in his direction.
"What does that mean?" Jack asks. "If it's a euphemism for something sexual, I encourage you to fire him."
"It's..." She shakes her head. "It's nothing."
His hand is over hers for the second time of the evening. "Congratulations on your award, Lemon."
"Thank you. Again."
END