Happiness: A Learned Skill

[michelle1963]

Happiness.  For some it is an elusive condition; for others, not so much.  Why?

Could it be brain chemistry?  Medical science seems to confirm the hypothesis that brain chemistry is a factor given that medications that alter it often result in an improved mood in depressed patients.  However, researchers have found that modifying thinking patterns

Comments

[ehowton]

It would seem awfully self-serving to reply to this entry, but suffice it to say I enjoyed your thoughts on recasting and would like to explore that aspect further, as it is something I have done time and time again without having a word for it.

[michelle1963]

I have done this..., this "recasting" for as long as I can remember. Like you, I had no word for it, nor did I even recognize it as a skill.

When I was thinking about this post, trying to pull together as many as the threads about happiness that I have read, and you and I have discussed lately, I realized that I had probably been taught the skill of "recasting" from my father. As an INFJ, he often looked at issues from many, many sides, and if it pertained to me, enjoyed discussing these many sides in great detail.

[ehowton]

My own father extolled the virtues of experience when I was younger. He never begrudged us a new experience and often went out of his way to ensure we could experience as many new things as possible - something I attempt to accomplish with my own children.

Raising "happy" children may not at all be about what best to teach them, rather to just live in the moment yourself with them and always open them up to new things!

Leading by example, rather that words.

[michelle1963]

Yes. Modeling. Probably the greatest gift one can give their children is experience coupled with teaching them to be unafraid of new things.

(Like your avatar. I need to make one for myself of my dad.)

[ehowton]

Its one of catttitude's favorites. We used to have it hanging on our kitchen wall.

[michelle1963]

Yes. It's a great pic of your dad.

[michelle1963]

And so now, I have my own "dad" avatar.

[ehowton]

God that's awesome.

[michelle1963]

Why thank you sir! And thanks for the inspiration as well.

[michelle1963]

I have no doubt that people are born with a certain propensity for happiness / depression, and some are at either ends of the scale. Sounds like your daughter fell distinctly to one side. I read that for adults who are depressed the best treatment is both a medication to treat the feelings of depression ASAP and cognitive therapy to teach them different ways of thinking (or coping if the depression is due to a specific trauma). For a two year old, that would be so tough.

[ehowton]

Yikes! Yeah - my brother and I had an identical upbringing but turned out two very different people.