Dinner Party: Review, Discussion, Etc..
Mostly a repost of what's at the fanpage:
Dinner Party Review
"So raw, so right, all night, all right oh yeah…"
-Hunter James van der Beek
Sing it, Hunter. Sing it loud and sing it proud. Now, when I first watched the episode of "Dinner Party" on Thursday night, I was too creeped out by Jan's little dance to really think about Hunter's brilliant little lyrics up there, and what they meant in terms of the episode itself. The word "raw" definitely pops out in terms of significance. We're all familiar with the word and its many uses, of course. The one definition I'm thinking of, however, is being in an "unrefined or natural state". Being open and out there with no barriers. No filters, no censors….just letting it all hang out (that's what she said) for everyone to see. Sound familiar? Well, if you watched Thursday's episode then I think you might know what I'm getting at. It's quite a shock when a show that was always adored for its brilliant subtly is presented in the rawest, ugliest, most ridiculous set up imaginable, y'know. What the hell is going on? What's happening to this show?
The basic plot of "Dinner Party" was pretty much what it sounds like. Michael and Jan finally get Jim and Pam to come over for dinner, along with Andy and Angela. If you recall, back before the strike started, Angela broke up with Dwight after he mercy killed her cat without her permission. Ha. I had a tough time getting through that sentence guys. Wow. Good times, good times. So, yeah. Angela and Andy are together now, and Dwight is still miserable over it. This episode takes place right after "The Deposition", which aired last November. The next episode will actually take place five months later, so it will be in its usual, "real time" schedule. The party is obviously for couples, as you can see, leaving Dwight out of the picture, unfortunately. He's a little upset about it, I guess you could say. He cries a little bit. Ya.
The party starts off halfway normal, I suppose. Not really. But it's nothing compared to what happens later in the evening. Hoooo doggy. It gets to be REAL ugly, folks. I'm talking Priscilla Presley ugly. Yeah…it's that bad. Jim and Pam are the first to arrive, and the happy hosts bring them on upstairs for a tour of their home. This is when the Babe marathon begins. What's the Babe marathon, you say? You mean you don't know, babe? Didn't you watch the show, babe? Well, I'm not going to tell you, babe. That's your own fault for not watching, babe. Yeah. I think you get the point.
So what's upstairs at the Michael and Jan love nest? Well, to put it bluntly, JAN. Yeah. Jan is all over that place. On the walls, in the rooms (she uses EVERY spare room along with the bedroom) and even on some videotapes. And I'm not talking about old holiday videos of the Levinsons or Jannie's graduation ceremony. No, these are of a much different genre I'd say. Yeah. Just look at this picture hanging on the staircase wall. Nothing says narcissism like a giant pop art print of your face, babe. Or, well, technically that's a snapshot of Melora at an event some years ago. Why they didn't have one done up of a Jan publicity shot is beyond me. But, whatever. Not my problem. So, upstairs, we have three rooms that are made to be bedrooms, I believe. There's the master bedroom of course. And then there are two other rooms that are slightly smaller. One of them, we learn, is Jan's office. And it's never even been used, according to Michael. The other room is for…..get ready. You might want to sit down for this one. "Serenity by Jan". Yes. That's right. Jan has started her very own candle making company. She makes them right there in that little meth lab, or uh…candle wax um…scented oil lab. Yeah. My bad. Did you ever see that Seinfeld episode when George's father kept saying "Serenity now!" whenever something would get him worked up? And then finally, the local nut job tells him that he tried that chant himself, right before he was admitted into the hospital. "Serenity now, Insanity later." He says. Hmmm. Jan's already pretty insane I'd say. So I really don't know what to think about those candles she's made. I'm pretty sure that I don't want ANY of part of her serenity though. She shoves a candle under Jim's nose that's named "Bonfire". Named, of course, because it smells like fire. Wow. That's really um….really clever, Jan. Yeah. What other scents are there? "Sulfur"? "Waxy wax wax"? If you master those fragrances to actually smell like spices and fruits, you may have something there. For vanilla: "This one really smells like Vanilla", For Coffee: "You DO have coffee breath, by the way", Rose Romance: "Bathroom Lust", and, my personal favorite, "I swear I wasn't just smoking in my office, sir". You could probably sell that one in a multiple of different scents, of course. Febreze, mouthwash, tic tac…the possibilities are endless, Jan! Yea! Moving on to the master bedroom now. Where the walls aren't white anymore, just so you know. No, now they're the much softer eggshell white. And even though it's the same color, we're now in so much more comfort. Why? Because Jan says so. Duh. Not much else to see in their bedroom. Pretty boring. Yeah. Oh, except for the video camera on the tripod that's facing the bed. And the cute LITTLE bench at the foot of the bed that doubles as Michael's bed. Jan has some space issues, apparently. But don't worry, guys. Michael's got serenity, remember? Serenity by Jan. Um….on second thought. RUN MICHAEL! RUUUNNNN!
Next, Andy and Angela show up. Oh, but not before Michael reveals his kick ass Plasma iphone. I'm sorry, what? That's actually a television set? Huh. My bad. Oh well. Clearly, it's the man's only joy in life. Well, besides the twins, obviously. Big boobs and a clear picture. Aint life grand? It sure is. Now let's hear some music now, shall we? Sure. Everyone's here now. Why not? Remember Jan's old assistant? Hunter James van der Beek? Of course. Who could forget the Huntermeister and his mysterious "good luck with your" band? Well, brace yourselves people. Cuz you's about to be HUNTED. That's right. Hunter made himself a cd, titled "The Hunted". Jan says he's a very talented songwriter. Let's listen ( or read), shall we?
"You took me by the hand,
Made me a man
That one night
You made everything all right
So raw, so right
All night, all right
Oh yeah oh yeah
So raw, so right
All night all right oh yeah …"
Mmmm. That is good, Jan. He's like a young Bobby Dylan…so full of passion about the pain and suffering of this terrible, terrible world. All right, oh yeah. So touching. Here's something, though. Just a little question, that's all. Just um…just curious. Uh…you didn't happen to…I dunno. Pop Hunter's cherry now. Did ya? Jan? Hmm? Because it kinda seems like ya did. With the way you were getting into the song and all. Swaying your hips, creeping us all out and stuff….yeah. Okay, well. I'm just going to assume that you did and take this time to uh…throw up in my mouth a little. Yup. Who's up for charades? Huh? I think you're gonna like this. This aint just your average charades. Get ready for CELEBRITY. Yeah, that's right. You have to give clues to who your celebrity is and people guess who they are. It's AWESOME.
No, it's not. So we're gonna skip to something else. Like, the fact that Michael apparently ran thru the glass slider at some point, because he thought he heard the ice cream truck. Which explains the temperature in the room. Can't expect to be warm with a giant opening in the house that's only covered by a tarp, y'know what I'm saying? Michael says it's Jan's fault because she had cleaned it so much that it looked invisible. Jan tells him that cleaning must make her the devil (and in case you didn't understand what she said, Melora was sure to make little horns on her head with her fingers, along with the most hilarious face I've ever seen). They both are laughing hysterically and causing an awkward scene, naturally. And then Michael says that she really is the devil, he's in hell, please help him, because he's burning. Wow. I'd absolutely LOVE to see how these two people survive a weekend together. Seriously. After watching this episode, it's a miracle that they're both still alive and kicking. And ready for more, as well! Amazing, isn't it? Remember when this show actually made sense sometimes? Yeah. That was nice. Can we go back to that way? Please? Cuz this blows. Big time. And that's what she said.
Just a few more things here, I promise. Trying my best to make this a quickie. Alright, that's enough. I know that's what she said. She says a lot, okay? She's really kind of a big whore if ya ask me. Either that or she's just got a really trashy vocabulary.
Here's a bunch of random information for you to sift through, in regards to the rest of the episode: At some point, Michael lied to Jan and claimed that he and Pam were lovers for a while. And Jan won't believe Pam when she denies this claim. And get this: Jan may very well be the only person who actually has the looks to kill. Seriously. I've never seen anyone's eyes be THAT evil. It. Was. AWESOME. Teach us, Jan. Please? Dwight shows up with his own cooler of food, some wine glasses, and…wait a minute. Nana? Dwight? Are you dating my grandmother? Oh, wait. False alarm. It's his old babysitter. And it's totally carnal, that's all you need to know. Michael reveals that he's had 3 vasectomies. Make up your mind, Jan. Do you want a kid or not? "If you want to have kids, then fine you win. Let's have a fucking kid." Yeah? Alright. Let's get you fucking pregnant then babe! I'm fucking psyched. Why are we swearing? Fuck if I know.
All this leads to finally sitting down to eat. If you're feeling lucky, anyway. Michael's not sure if Jan's poisoning his food. Take a few bites. See what happens, I guess. Make your meals exciting for once. Could be poison. Could be sweet, delicious fun! You never know. Jan cries, Michael removes a giant painting and puts up a neon beer light, Jan sways to Hunter's creepy ballad in retaliation, Michael sorta kinda calls her a hooker, and then she hucks one of his Dundies at the plasma iphone. Television. I meant to say television. Sorry. Michael then yells at her for cracking the screen, she runs off crying, and now its time to say goodbye. That's when the cops show up. Have I been watching Benny Hill this whole time? Is that it? Is that what the problem is? This isn't really The Office? Have I been punked? Is Ashton Kusher hidden somewhere with his shiny cougar wife?
Wish that were true, but sadly, I really WAS watching The Office after all. Only, well, it wasn't The Office that I fell in love with so long ago. What I just sat through was a crude, pathetic imposter. A very cruel, very thoughtless joke. Written by the same two idiots that dreamed up last seasons shocker, "Women's Appreciation". I have no idea why, but both of these episodes have been totally focused on destroying Jan. Making her out to be the most vile, dirty, thoughtless piece of shit to ever walk the face of this planet. Am I accusing them of anything? No, no. This isn't Law and Order, guys. I just think it's odd, that's all. Whatever they're doing, there's one thing that I know for sure. They don't belong on this show. They're talented guys, but their comedy is way too immature for this series. Every other writer on that show gets it. They understand what's made the show a success. And that's the presence of intelligence combined with subtly, mixed together with just the right amount of humor. These guys, Gene Stupinitsky and Lee Eisenberg, don't know the first thing about how to write this show. It's like they sit in a room and giggle about Melora, and boobs, and amateur porn, or how all women are heartless bitches and only good for sex….etc. Then they remember they have a deadline and write up some random script about whatever they were giggling about this whole time. And VOILA! We're now watching the most ridiculous story ever, revolving around Melora's "excellent butt" and "shrunken chesticles". What? Exactly. Because of those two guys, Jan is now an evil, heartless bitch who enjoys fucking guys in schoolgirl outfits and possibly very young Emo musicians that know how to type. Well…at least now she's got some excellent boobs to match her excellent butt. Yea! Please, somebody. Get rid of those two goobers. They're ruining the show. I'm not the only one who saying this, y'know. Stop eating your JAM sandwiches and look around at other items on the menu. They're tasty. Trust me.
Finally, before I sign off, let's all give a big hand to Melora for an Emmy worthy performance. Yeah! Wooooooooo! You owned that episode, girl! Wow! Creepiness aside, you were totally on top of your game the entire half hour. Start to finish. Simply a POWERHOUSE performance. We are all just so, so proud of you, Melora. Really and truly. We all knew what you could do. We were just waiting for SOMEONE to give you enough room to do your thing the way you felt it should be done. Beautifully. Congratulations in advance for your Emmy nomination that I'm sure you'll be getting. You deserve it, kid.
Dinner Party Review
"So raw, so right, all night, all right oh yeah…"
-Hunter James van der Beek
Sing it, Hunter. Sing it loud and sing it proud. Now, when I first watched the episode of "Dinner Party" on Thursday night, I was too creeped out by Jan's little dance to really think about Hunter's brilliant little lyrics up there, and what they meant in terms of the episode itself. The word "raw" definitely pops out in terms of significance. We're all familiar with the word and its many uses, of course. The one definition I'm thinking of, however, is being in an "unrefined or natural state". Being open and out there with no barriers. No filters, no censors….just letting it all hang out (that's what she said) for everyone to see. Sound familiar? Well, if you watched Thursday's episode then I think you might know what I'm getting at. It's quite a shock when a show that was always adored for its brilliant subtly is presented in the rawest, ugliest, most ridiculous set up imaginable, y'know. What the hell is going on? What's happening to this show?
The basic plot of "Dinner Party" was pretty much what it sounds like. Michael and Jan finally get Jim and Pam to come over for dinner, along with Andy and Angela. If you recall, back before the strike started, Angela broke up with Dwight after he mercy killed her cat without her permission. Ha. I had a tough time getting through that sentence guys. Wow. Good times, good times. So, yeah. Angela and Andy are together now, and Dwight is still miserable over it. This episode takes place right after "The Deposition", which aired last November. The next episode will actually take place five months later, so it will be in its usual, "real time" schedule. The party is obviously for couples, as you can see, leaving Dwight out of the picture, unfortunately. He's a little upset about it, I guess you could say. He cries a little bit. Ya.
The party starts off halfway normal, I suppose. Not really. But it's nothing compared to what happens later in the evening. Hoooo doggy. It gets to be REAL ugly, folks. I'm talking Priscilla Presley ugly. Yeah…it's that bad. Jim and Pam are the first to arrive, and the happy hosts bring them on upstairs for a tour of their home. This is when the Babe marathon begins. What's the Babe marathon, you say? You mean you don't know, babe? Didn't you watch the show, babe? Well, I'm not going to tell you, babe. That's your own fault for not watching, babe. Yeah. I think you get the point.
So what's upstairs at the Michael and Jan love nest? Well, to put it bluntly, JAN. Yeah. Jan is all over that place. On the walls, in the rooms (she uses EVERY spare room along with the bedroom) and even on some videotapes. And I'm not talking about old holiday videos of the Levinsons or Jannie's graduation ceremony. No, these are of a much different genre I'd say. Yeah. Just look at this picture hanging on the staircase wall. Nothing says narcissism like a giant pop art print of your face, babe. Or, well, technically that's a snapshot of Melora at an event some years ago. Why they didn't have one done up of a Jan publicity shot is beyond me. But, whatever. Not my problem. So, upstairs, we have three rooms that are made to be bedrooms, I believe. There's the master bedroom of course. And then there are two other rooms that are slightly smaller. One of them, we learn, is Jan's office. And it's never even been used, according to Michael. The other room is for…..get ready. You might want to sit down for this one. "Serenity by Jan". Yes. That's right. Jan has started her very own candle making company. She makes them right there in that little meth lab, or uh…candle wax um…scented oil lab. Yeah. My bad. Did you ever see that Seinfeld episode when George's father kept saying "Serenity now!" whenever something would get him worked up? And then finally, the local nut job tells him that he tried that chant himself, right before he was admitted into the hospital. "Serenity now, Insanity later." He says. Hmmm. Jan's already pretty insane I'd say. So I really don't know what to think about those candles she's made. I'm pretty sure that I don't want ANY of part of her serenity though. She shoves a candle under Jim's nose that's named "Bonfire". Named, of course, because it smells like fire. Wow. That's really um….really clever, Jan. Yeah. What other scents are there? "Sulfur"? "Waxy wax wax"? If you master those fragrances to actually smell like spices and fruits, you may have something there. For vanilla: "This one really smells like Vanilla", For Coffee: "You DO have coffee breath, by the way", Rose Romance: "Bathroom Lust", and, my personal favorite, "I swear I wasn't just smoking in my office, sir". You could probably sell that one in a multiple of different scents, of course. Febreze, mouthwash, tic tac…the possibilities are endless, Jan! Yea! Moving on to the master bedroom now. Where the walls aren't white anymore, just so you know. No, now they're the much softer eggshell white. And even though it's the same color, we're now in so much more comfort. Why? Because Jan says so. Duh. Not much else to see in their bedroom. Pretty boring. Yeah. Oh, except for the video camera on the tripod that's facing the bed. And the cute LITTLE bench at the foot of the bed that doubles as Michael's bed. Jan has some space issues, apparently. But don't worry, guys. Michael's got serenity, remember? Serenity by Jan. Um….on second thought. RUN MICHAEL! RUUUNNNN!
Next, Andy and Angela show up. Oh, but not before Michael reveals his kick ass Plasma iphone. I'm sorry, what? That's actually a television set? Huh. My bad. Oh well. Clearly, it's the man's only joy in life. Well, besides the twins, obviously. Big boobs and a clear picture. Aint life grand? It sure is. Now let's hear some music now, shall we? Sure. Everyone's here now. Why not? Remember Jan's old assistant? Hunter James van der Beek? Of course. Who could forget the Huntermeister and his mysterious "good luck with your" band? Well, brace yourselves people. Cuz you's about to be HUNTED. That's right. Hunter made himself a cd, titled "The Hunted". Jan says he's a very talented songwriter. Let's listen ( or read), shall we?
"You took me by the hand,
Made me a man
That one night
You made everything all right
So raw, so right
All night, all right
Oh yeah oh yeah
So raw, so right
All night all right oh yeah …"
Mmmm. That is good, Jan. He's like a young Bobby Dylan…so full of passion about the pain and suffering of this terrible, terrible world. All right, oh yeah. So touching. Here's something, though. Just a little question, that's all. Just um…just curious. Uh…you didn't happen to…I dunno. Pop Hunter's cherry now. Did ya? Jan? Hmm? Because it kinda seems like ya did. With the way you were getting into the song and all. Swaying your hips, creeping us all out and stuff….yeah. Okay, well. I'm just going to assume that you did and take this time to uh…throw up in my mouth a little. Yup. Who's up for charades? Huh? I think you're gonna like this. This aint just your average charades. Get ready for CELEBRITY. Yeah, that's right. You have to give clues to who your celebrity is and people guess who they are. It's AWESOME.
No, it's not. So we're gonna skip to something else. Like, the fact that Michael apparently ran thru the glass slider at some point, because he thought he heard the ice cream truck. Which explains the temperature in the room. Can't expect to be warm with a giant opening in the house that's only covered by a tarp, y'know what I'm saying? Michael says it's Jan's fault because she had cleaned it so much that it looked invisible. Jan tells him that cleaning must make her the devil (and in case you didn't understand what she said, Melora was sure to make little horns on her head with her fingers, along with the most hilarious face I've ever seen). They both are laughing hysterically and causing an awkward scene, naturally. And then Michael says that she really is the devil, he's in hell, please help him, because he's burning. Wow. I'd absolutely LOVE to see how these two people survive a weekend together. Seriously. After watching this episode, it's a miracle that they're both still alive and kicking. And ready for more, as well! Amazing, isn't it? Remember when this show actually made sense sometimes? Yeah. That was nice. Can we go back to that way? Please? Cuz this blows. Big time. And that's what she said.
Just a few more things here, I promise. Trying my best to make this a quickie. Alright, that's enough. I know that's what she said. She says a lot, okay? She's really kind of a big whore if ya ask me. Either that or she's just got a really trashy vocabulary.
Here's a bunch of random information for you to sift through, in regards to the rest of the episode: At some point, Michael lied to Jan and claimed that he and Pam were lovers for a while. And Jan won't believe Pam when she denies this claim. And get this: Jan may very well be the only person who actually has the looks to kill. Seriously. I've never seen anyone's eyes be THAT evil. It. Was. AWESOME. Teach us, Jan. Please? Dwight shows up with his own cooler of food, some wine glasses, and…wait a minute. Nana? Dwight? Are you dating my grandmother? Oh, wait. False alarm. It's his old babysitter. And it's totally carnal, that's all you need to know. Michael reveals that he's had 3 vasectomies. Make up your mind, Jan. Do you want a kid or not? "If you want to have kids, then fine you win. Let's have a fucking kid." Yeah? Alright. Let's get you fucking pregnant then babe! I'm fucking psyched. Why are we swearing? Fuck if I know.
All this leads to finally sitting down to eat. If you're feeling lucky, anyway. Michael's not sure if Jan's poisoning his food. Take a few bites. See what happens, I guess. Make your meals exciting for once. Could be poison. Could be sweet, delicious fun! You never know. Jan cries, Michael removes a giant painting and puts up a neon beer light, Jan sways to Hunter's creepy ballad in retaliation, Michael sorta kinda calls her a hooker, and then she hucks one of his Dundies at the plasma iphone. Television. I meant to say television. Sorry. Michael then yells at her for cracking the screen, she runs off crying, and now its time to say goodbye. That's when the cops show up. Have I been watching Benny Hill this whole time? Is that it? Is that what the problem is? This isn't really The Office? Have I been punked? Is Ashton Kusher hidden somewhere with his shiny cougar wife?
Wish that were true, but sadly, I really WAS watching The Office after all. Only, well, it wasn't The Office that I fell in love with so long ago. What I just sat through was a crude, pathetic imposter. A very cruel, very thoughtless joke. Written by the same two idiots that dreamed up last seasons shocker, "Women's Appreciation". I have no idea why, but both of these episodes have been totally focused on destroying Jan. Making her out to be the most vile, dirty, thoughtless piece of shit to ever walk the face of this planet. Am I accusing them of anything? No, no. This isn't Law and Order, guys. I just think it's odd, that's all. Whatever they're doing, there's one thing that I know for sure. They don't belong on this show. They're talented guys, but their comedy is way too immature for this series. Every other writer on that show gets it. They understand what's made the show a success. And that's the presence of intelligence combined with subtly, mixed together with just the right amount of humor. These guys, Gene Stupinitsky and Lee Eisenberg, don't know the first thing about how to write this show. It's like they sit in a room and giggle about Melora, and boobs, and amateur porn, or how all women are heartless bitches and only good for sex….etc. Then they remember they have a deadline and write up some random script about whatever they were giggling about this whole time. And VOILA! We're now watching the most ridiculous story ever, revolving around Melora's "excellent butt" and "shrunken chesticles". What? Exactly. Because of those two guys, Jan is now an evil, heartless bitch who enjoys fucking guys in schoolgirl outfits and possibly very young Emo musicians that know how to type. Well…at least now she's got some excellent boobs to match her excellent butt. Yea! Please, somebody. Get rid of those two goobers. They're ruining the show. I'm not the only one who saying this, y'know. Stop eating your JAM sandwiches and look around at other items on the menu. They're tasty. Trust me.
Finally, before I sign off, let's all give a big hand to Melora for an Emmy worthy performance. Yeah! Wooooooooo! You owned that episode, girl! Wow! Creepiness aside, you were totally on top of your game the entire half hour. Start to finish. Simply a POWERHOUSE performance. We are all just so, so proud of you, Melora. Really and truly. We all knew what you could do. We were just waiting for SOMEONE to give you enough room to do your thing the way you felt it should be done. Beautifully. Congratulations in advance for your Emmy nomination that I'm sure you'll be getting. You deserve it, kid.